105: Body Confidence Reclaimed in 2nd Birth

In a bustling city teeming with ambition and dreams, Alexis - an actress, dreamer, and now mother takes us on her journey into motherhood. From the grand stages of New York City to the intimate confines of a 5-story Harlem walk-up, Alexis prepares for the role of a lifetime. As she immerses herself in prenatal yoga, pores over all the books, and engages in birth classes, her transition is magnified by music, art, and deep-rooted determination. Facing an accelerated birth amid apprehensive paramedics, the ties of sisterhood bring comfort as her doula holds the fort. In the midst of chaos, Alexis gives birth at home, keeping her resilience flowing like a quiet undercurrent and a new star, baby Anita, is born.  A tale of dreams, drama, and the divine journey into motherhood... This is the mesmerizing story of Alexis Field giving birth to baby Anita.

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In this 2nd episode of a 2-parter, Kaitlin shares her 2nd and 3rd babies’ birth stories. After having a traumatic first birth, Kaitlin finds her voice and makes every effort to help things go differently. This includes finding a VBAC-supportive provider since she was aiming to have a vaginal birth after cesarean, seeking out lots of education and hiring a doula for support. She contrasts the ways in which her 2nd baby’s birth was redemptive and empowering, and then shares her very efficient homebirth with her 3rd. Kaitlin explains how her experiences were what not only drew her to becoming a birth doula but also motivated her to start Be Her Village as a way to help birthing families access the support they need whether they can afford it or not through a gift registry for support and education. 

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Today’s story is the 1st episode of a 2-parter. In it, the founder of Be Her Village, a baby registry that provides a way to give the gift of support instead of far less important baby gear, shares her first of 3 babies’ birth stories. Kaitlin’s 3 births couldn’t be more different from each other. In this episode, Kaitlin shares planning for a birthing center birth with midwives that shifted to a hospital induction and, ultimately, an unplanned cesarean. She shares how it was traumatic not because of the mode of birth, but largely because of the way she was treated. This first story lays the foundation for both why she made different choices for births 2 and 3, which will be shared in the next episode, and why she started Be Her Village as a way to help folks access the support they need for a great birth and postpartum period. Sneak peek into the next episode: she has a transformative, healing 2nd vaginal birth after cesarean (or VBAC) in a hospital with an OB and doula, and with her third a much faster labor and birth at home. 

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Melissa had her first baby as a teen but second baby 15 years later with a different partner and with an early pregnancy loss in between. Each journey was very different, and she shares in today’s episode how and why she made quite different choices for her most recent birthing process. This included switching from obstetrical care to hospital midwifery care to, ultimately, have an unmedicated birth in a freestanding birthing center in Washington state. She shares feeling instant love for her firstborn, like she’d never known. She then details experiencing grief stemming from her previous early pregnancy loss during her 3rd pregnancy and shares how that loss created anxiety and hesitation to bond with baby during pregnancy. But then Melissa shares a reclamation of confidence in her body through birthing her second son. Melissa also shares a bit about how easy breastfeeding was with her first son, yet how much more challenging both breastfeeding and pumping was her second time around.

And, just a quick content warning, though you probably already picked up on it in the description: pregnancy loss will be mentioned and detailed in this story.

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In part 2 of this 2-episode birth story, Jessica shares the rest of her unmedicated birth story with midwives in an NYC hospital. She details the contrast of her very positive birth experience to the postpartum care experience, discusses some initial breastfeeding challenges in which an IBCLC provides stellar support and addresses a lip tie & tongue tie her son had. She also shares how important a postpartum virtual support group the our doula collective offered was for her as a new parent and the essential community of support she discovered there.

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Jessica learned about midwives and doulas in a college class, which planted the seed for her desire once becoming pregnant for an unmedicated birth. As a runner, she made connections between how empowering and satisfying running a race can be to her desire to have an unmedicated birth. In this episode, Jessica shares her story of alternative conception while planning a wedding, switching care providers twice to find an ideal match with hospital midwives, hiring a doula and educating herself all with the goal of achieving the unmedicated birth she very much hoped for and was able to achieve. This is part 1 of a 2 part birth story, and fun sneak peek for the next episode: you’ll hear details of how her son was born en caul (with the amniotic sac intact).

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Bettina prides herself on being a thorough researcher. She carries that into pregnancy and  interviews 6 doulas before choosing one, switches from an OB to midwifery care when she doesn’t feel aligned, gets prenatal breastfeeding support due to having inverted nipples, and more. At the end of pregnancy, talk of induction arises due to concerns of fetal growth restriction due to baby measuring small. Knowing that she and her partner are healthy but fairly petite people, she trusts her baby is healthy, advocates for more time, even signing an Against Medical Advice form to not be induced at 39 weeks, and meanwhile tries all the natural induction techniques. Her proactive measures pay off and help her have a respectful, well-supported, unmedicated hospital birth. Bettina also shares some about the breastfeeding challenges she faced and the expert support she received from both lactation consultants and a chiropractor who specializes in the Webster technique for newborns.

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Following an early pregnancy scare, Taylor proceeds to have a healthy pregnancy. Feeling frustrated when she passes her due date and isn’t showing much change toward going into labor, Taylor tries all the things to start labor and avoid induction. Once her water breaks, she has a super efficient unmedicated birth in which she labors at home for as long as possible until she starts feeling pressure and arrives at the hospital just in time to push and give birth. She and Joey share how educating themselves made a big difference in not feeling the need to rush to the hospital when her water broke, and how her empowering birth experience has awakened an interest in moving into birth work.

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Sierra envisioned a waterbirth for her baby, but was disheartened to find it’s hard to find a birthing location where that’s possible and also hard to find birthing center options in NYC. With the help of her doula, she finds the one birthing center in all of NYC and switches her care. Working with midwives, Sierra immediately feels much more cared about, seen and heard than she ever did with her hospital OB. Listen to hear this exciting story of how Sierra’s son had very different plans for where he wanted to be born at 39 weeks!

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Despite the fact that EmJ has always had a self-professed low pain tolerance, she finds instinctive coping mechanisms that work for her to have the unmedicated birth that she had hoped to have in a Manhattan hospital. Part of what helps this happen was how EmJ receives uncommonly doula-like support from the nurses that helps her to manage well when things were at the most intense points. After the birth story, EmJ details navigating breastfeeding, and ultimately, exclusive pumping, in light of having had previous breast reduction surgery. She seeks out pelvic PT and finds it incredibly valuable to do an initial phone consult shortly after birth, particularly since she had experienced a fairly significant tear. Finally, EmJ gives some lesser known info on how she learned as a solo business owner that she could participate in the NY State Paid Parental Leave program and give us some tricks for small business owners. 

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