Podcast Summary
Testing the Limits of Awful Behavior on Dating Apps: Despite terrible behavior, an attractive profile on dating apps can still receive numerous messages, emphasizing the superficial nature of online dating.
People's behavior on dating apps like OKCupid can be surprising. Comedy writer Ali Reid created a fake profile as an Aaron Carter fan to test the limits of how awful a person could be before men would stop messaging. The profile, which included listing "convincing people I'm pregnant" as a skill and "knocking the cups out of homeless people's hands" as a typical Friday night activity, was very successful, receiving over 1000 messages in a few weeks. The success of the profile can be attributed to the fact that the woman was presented as attractive, despite her terrible behavior. This experiment highlights the superficial nature of online dating and the importance of appearances, even for those with repellent personalities.
The Superstar Effect in Online Dating: Studies show that attractiveness, education, income, and profession significantly impact online dating success. Men tend to prefer younger women, while women prefer older, financially stable partners.
Online dating can be a complex and intriguing world, where looks play a significant role in determining who receives the most attention. A study found that a hot woman receives roughly four times the messages an average-looking woman gets, and 25 times as many as an ugly one. This phenomenon is known as the "superstar effect." Men are also drawn to certain professions, such as lawyers, doctors, men in the military, and firefighters. Paul Oyer, a labor economist at Stanford, turned his attention to online dating after re-entering the dating world himself and realizing that the dating market shares similarities with labor markets. He found that education and income can indirectly impact attractiveness, as people with higher education and income levels are more likely to make more money, making them more attractive on dating sites. While looks matter a lot, weight doesn't matter as much independent of attractiveness. However, it's important to note that men and women have different preferences. For example, men tend to prefer younger women, while women tend to prefer older, more financially stable partners. Overall, approaching online dating with a factual and economically-minded perspective can lead to better outcomes.
Balancing Bragging and Self-Deprecation in Online Dating Profiles: Strike a balance between boasting and self-deprecation in online dating profiles to attract potential partners. Authenticity, humor, and clear representation of personality are key.
While income may not be as important a factor for men in online dating as it is for women, creating an effective dating profile is crucial for both genders. According to economist Paul Oyer, it's important to strike a balance between bragging and self-deprecation in one's profile. However, being too transparent or bragging too much can come across as unattractive. It's also essential to be aware of potential misunderstandings in communication, such as the meaning of certain words or phrases. In the end, building a successful online dating profile involves authenticity, humor, and a clear representation of one's personality. It's also important to consider which dating site to use based on personal preferences and goals. Overall, Oyer's research provides valuable insights into the rules of attraction in online dating, but it's essential to remember that every individual's experience may vary.
Identifying your dating objectives and market dynamics: Be clear about what you want in a relationship, leverage demographic advantages in favorable markets, and exercise patience for a good match.
Understanding your objectives and the market dynamics can significantly impact your approach to online dating. According to economist Paul Oyer, the first step is to identify what you're looking for – be it marriage, companionship, or option value. New York City, being demographically more female than male, provides a good competitive advantage for straight males seeking partners. Moreover, being 28 years old means you have the luxury of time and the ability to be picky, as a successful relationship could last for decades. Economists refer to the concept of settling when the benefits of continuing the search outweigh the benefits of the current option. However, at 28, your patience level should be high, and you should aim for a good match. Overall, Oyer suggests that using a large dating website like OKCupid in a city like New York City puts you in a favorable position in the online dating market.
A larger dating pool increases chances of compatibility: A larger dating pool can lead to more compatible matches, but only if the technology effectively filters and presents suitable candidates, potentially increasing the cost of screening.
Being in a large dating pool, despite the initial overwhelming feeling, can increase your chances of finding a compatible partner. The speaker uses the analogy of a boardwalk with various compatible and incompatible individuals, where having a larger pool (more women on the boardwalk) increases the likelihood of finding a good fit, but only if the technology is advanced enough to effectively filter and present suitable matches. The speaker also mentions the concept of a "thick market effect," where having more options can lead to higher costs of screening potential candidates. Ultimately, the speaker expresses a preference for a dating site with robust filtering capabilities, as it allows for a more efficient search in a larger pool.
Exploring the depths of online dating profiles: Fill profiles with detail, signal compatibility, and authenticity. Mindful of signals sent as they impact potential matches in online dating.
The process of online dating relies heavily on algorithms and the information provided in your profile. Economist Paul Boyer, author of "Everything I Ever Needed to Know About Economics I Learned From Online Dating," suggests filling out your profile with more detail, keeping in mind the importance of signaling compatibility and authenticity. However, he also acknowledges that people sometimes lie or omit information to send a specific message. The order of discovering information in online dating has flipped, with attributes being shown first and compatibility assessed later. OKCupid's "My Details" section allows users to fill in various facts about themselves, some of which can be manipulated to signal desirability for certain types of relationships. Boyer suggests being mindful of the signals you send, as they can have a strong impact on potential matches. Ultimately, online dating is a bigger deal than you think, as it challenges traditional methods of finding compatibility and introduces new elements of strategy and self-presentation.
Considering the impact of your dating profile details: Be truthful about your interests and circumstances to attract suitable matches and filter out unsuitable ones.
When creating a dating profile, it's important to consider how your details may be perceived and the potential impact on attracting certain types of people. Economists suggest being mindful of statistical discrimination and adverse selection. For instance, frequent jokes about alcohol consumption or casual attire in photos may give the impression of not being serious about settling down. Additionally, women often look for certain traits in a potential spouse, such as wealth, and being upfront about your background and income level can help filter out unsuitable matches. Being truthful about your interests and circumstances can lead to better matches in the long run. It's essential to understand the distinction between those who will be attracted to your profile initially and those who will like you once they get to know you. Being transparent in coordination games, where interests are aligned, can lead to successful matches.
Expert advice leads to increased interest in online dating: Following expert tips, such as updating photos and answering more questions, can lead to more messages from potential matches in online dating.
Making adjustments to your online dating profile based on expert advice can lead to increased interest from potential matches. In the case of PJ Vote, he followed the advice of Paul Euler and made changes to his OKCupid profile, including updating photos and answering more questions about himself. The result was an influx of new messages from women. However, it's important to note that the new photo may have also contributed to the increase in attention. Additionally, being authentic and showcasing one's best attributes is crucial, but avoiding coming across as vain or listing insignificant traits as selling points is also important. Overall, the experience serves as a reminder that learning from experts and being open to making adjustments can lead to positive outcomes in the realm of online dating.
Online dating flips traditional process on its head: Online dating allows individuals to view potential partners' attributes before assessing compatibility, improving chances of successful matches for certain groups like young gay and lesbian individuals and ethnic communities.
Online dating has significantly transformed the way people connect and form relationships, especially for individuals in smaller or specific communities where finding a compatible partner might be challenging. Economist Justin Wolfers explains that the internet has flipped the traditional dating process on its head, allowing individuals to view potential partners' attributes before assessing compatibility. This high-information approach is believed to improve the chances of successful matches, but the long-term stability of these relationships remains to be seen. For various reasons, including societal pressures and geographical limitations, online dating has been particularly beneficial for certain groups, such as young gay and lesbian individuals, and members of ethnic communities. Overall, online dating represents a new and theoretically improved way for individuals to navigate the vast pool of potential partners and increase their chances of finding a compatible match.
