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    Home > Episode > 188: Coming Home to Ourselves:

    About this Episode

    Constantly searching for validation and happiness outside of ourselves can be an exhausting and often disappointing journey which is why we must learn how to come home to ourselves.

    Finding neutrality in our journeys without so much pressure on the outcome or the ideas of the outside world is a practice that Sonia Jhas has been working on for years.

    Sonia gave up her skyrocketing corporate career and through her journey of deep analysis, education, determination, and willpower she uncovered a deep passion for wellness, as well as a driving desire to help others. 

    She made it her mission to help people live their best lives through online talks, speaking engagements, television appearances, and coaching. 

    The TEDx speaker and award-winning mindset and wellness expert’s enthusiasm, sense of humor, and openness about her own journey have earned her a reputation as an unstoppable force in the wellness arena. She is the author of the book, I’ll Start Again Tomorrow (And Other Lies I’ve Told Myself).

    I’m so excited for you to hear this vulnerable conversation with Sonia.

     

    We’re going to dig into:

    • [4:50] What does happiness mean to Sonia

    • [8:34] Finding neutrality to find your own inner peace and happiness

    • [11:48] How to get out of your own head

    • [17:25] Who would you be if no one was watching?

    • [18:45] Diving into the story of how she wrote her book

    • [29:13] How do you keep growing and evolving without having to start from scratch each time?

    • [36:35] The problem of burning ourselves out while chasing after the myth of getting “there” and THEN things calming down

    • [38:55] The drive of fear and our idea of safety

    • [46:00] How can someone create a little more happiness each day starting today

     

     

    Resources:

     

    Connect with Sonia

     

    Connect with Simona

     

    Recent Episodes from Happiness Happens

    223: Coming Back Home to You with Randi Halaway

    223: Coming Back Home to You with Randi Halaway

    We’re all on a unique journey in life, striving to become the best version of ourselves. One of the key catalysts in that journey is truly understanding who we are and embodying our most authentic self. In this week’s episode of the Happiness Happens podcast, I’m joined by Randi Halaway, a Self love and Business Coach for women who are READY to step into their highest level of mastery and claim more freedom, abundance, and fulfillment in their lives. Our talk revolves around the importance of self-love, mastering a heart-centered life, and reconnecting with our true selves. 

    The conversation opened with Randi emphasizing the power of feeling inspired, aligned, and tuned in to your unique purpose and potential on this earth. As she explained, self-love plays a vital role in self-discovery and personal growth. By loving and accepting ourselves, we can break through limiting beliefs and blocks that prevent us from expressing our true nature.

    Randi also shared her personal journey, including her shift from a 17-year career as a hairstylist to becoming a champion for women, empowering them to step into their highest level of mastery and claim more freedom, abundance, and fulfillment in their lives.

    Our interaction with others can often lead us to stray from our path, particularly when we start absorbing their emotions or problems. Sharing her insights, Randi emphasized the need for balance between having an open heart and not taking on more than what is meant for us. Whether it's someone else's emotion or issues, recognizing it and if it's not for us, releasing it with love can help us reclaim our power.

    We also touched on the importance of remaining connected with our inner peace, especially in a world that can often be chaotic and overpowering. Randi’s words about everything happening in our outer world ultimately being a reflection of our inner world resonated strongly. By nourishing our inner peace, we can reduce the impact of external factors on our happiness.

    Navigating the interplay between ego and our past traumas can be challenging, but it is crucial in fostering self-love and understanding. Randi delved into how our egos, which are designed to protect us, can sometimes lead us to create illusions of control and safety.

    By recognizing these patterns and leaning into our intuition, we can free ourselves from these constraints and open up to a more heart-based and authentic understanding of ourselves. This shift in perspective can lead to experiencing a deeper connection to our true selves.

    To embrace a heart-centered life, Randi stresses the need for making ourselves a priority and grounding our intentions in our hearts rather than our minds. By releasing the need for external validation and focusing on providing it for ourselves, we can manifest a life that aligns with our true selves.

    The journey towards a heart-centered and authentic life is a continuous one, filled with moments of self-discovery, growth, and transformation. As Randi poignantly stated, "The idea is learning how to navigate the uncomfort of being out of control, the uncomfort of the unknown all those types of things.”

    We’ll touch on:

    • 0:00 Intro

    • 2:34 What does happiness mean to you

    • 3:45 How to balance living with an open heart while not taking on what isn’t meant for you

    • 7:13 Learning to release something without having to go through extensive practices

    • 11:10 Our need for control

    • 13:47 What does it feel like when you have a deep connection to self

    • 17:32 Wanting people's acceptance of your choices and how they understand from the lens of their past experiences

    • 20:59 The idea of being who you truly are

    • 23:47 Are Ego and Trauma cohabitants, the more trauma the higher the ego?

    • 26:40 Where do you go from the place of feeling like you're doing the wrong thing because of someone else's reaction

    • 32:46 How to create a little more happiness in your day, every day, starting today

     

    Resources:

     

     

    Connect with Randi

     

    Connect with Simona

     

    Happiness Happens
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    222: Self Awareness, Assertiveness, and Creating Real Boundaries

    222: Self Awareness, Assertiveness, and Creating Real Boundaries

    In today's fast-paced world, creating and maintaining boundaries in our personal and professional lives has become crucial for our well-being and happiness. Join me, as I delve into the topic of setting boundaries in a tangible and impactful way, sharing personal insights and practical tips to help you navigate this journey towards a more authentic and fulfilling life.

    Intro to Setting Boundaries
    How do you create better boundaries in your life with your family, friends, loved ones, and even with yourself? This is a question many of us grapple with daily. Setting boundaries is not about being mean; it's about honoring your needs and values. It's about living authentically and prioritizing your happiness above all else.

    Figuring out Your Level of Perfectionism and People Pleasing Tendencies
    One of the first steps in setting boundaries is understanding your level of perfectionism and people-pleasing tendencies. It's easy to fall into the trap of living your life for others, sacrificing your own happiness in the process. By getting quiet with yourself and being discerning of others' opinions, you can start to differentiate between what serves you and what doesn't.

    Making Boundaries Does Not Equal Being Mean
    Putting up boundaries can be challenging, especially if you fear being perceived as mean. However, being assertive in your communication and learning to say no are essential skills in setting and maintaining boundaries. Remember, saying no is not selfish; it's a way of respecting your limits and prioritizing your well-being.

    Communication is Key
    Effective communication is fundamental in setting boundaries. By expressing your needs and limits assertively but kindly, you can ensure that others understand and respect your boundaries. Using "I" statements and being direct in your communication can help establish clear boundaries that benefit both you and those around you.

    Self-awareness and Setting Boundaries
    Self-awareness plays a significant role in the boundary-setting process. Understanding your limits, values, and what brings you joy is essential for creating boundaries that align with your true self. Pay attention to how certain situations and relationships make you feel and honor those feelings by setting boundaries that support your well-being.

    Setting boundaries is a journey of self-discovery and empowerment. It's about learning to trust yourself, make aligned decisions, and prioritize your happiness. Remember, it's not your job to seek approval from others or justify your choices. By setting boundaries that reflect your values and needs, you are taking a powerful step towards living authentically and joyfully.

    pens when you prioritize your well-being and honor your truth. Stay empowered, stay authentic, and let happiness happen when you least expect it.

    We’ll touch on:

    • 0:00 Intro

    • 0:26 Figuring out your level of perfectionism and people pleasing tendencies

    • 4:34 Making boundaries does not equal being mean

    • 05:57 Adapting to better communication

    • 07:05 Learn how to say no

    • 08:58 Developing self awareness

     

    Resources:

     

    Connect with Simona

     

    Happiness Happens
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    221: The Year of the Wood Dragon: Understanding the Chinese New Year and the New 20-Year Cycle with Patricia Lohan

    221: The Year of the Wood Dragon: Understanding the Chinese New Year and the New 20-Year Cycle with Patricia Lohan

    We're diving into a conversation with a repeat guest on the podcast, Patricia Lohan. A feng shui expert, speaker, author, and widely regarded as the Mary Poppins of prosperity, Patricia is here to delve into an entirely different topic than our last conversation. Today, we're talking about the Chinese New Year, specifically the Year of the Wood Dragon, and the new 20-year cycle we are stepping into. 

    The Dawn of a New 20-Year Cycle
    As Patricia explains, feng shui, like Chinese medicine, aligns its principles with the seasons and cycles of nature. Following this path, we are now entering not just the Year of the Wood Dragon but a new dynamic in the larger 180-year cycle, known as Cycle 9. 

    The previous cycle, period 8, was dominated by the earth element and symbolized by young men in business. It was an era characterized by education, wisdom, and long-term building with a slow and steady energy. With the advancement into the new era, period 9, we're entering a contrasting phase dominated by the energy of fire.

    Impacts of the Fire Energy in Period 9
    The fire element in period 9 brings about a sense of transformation, soul discovery, and the rising power of mature women. It's a period of constant change, symbolic of passion, aggression, excitement, and flexibility. Over the next 20 years, we can expect to see the emergence of more female leaders, entrepreneurs, and changemakers stepping into their power. 

    Apart from the gender dynamics, this period also anticipates significant technological advancements. Entrepreneurs and businesses must embrace technology to thrive, focusing on online presence, 3D virtual reality, blockchain energy, solar power, biotech, digital media, social media, and PR, among others.

    Riding The Wave of Transformation
    For those keen on riding this wave of transformation, it's essential to focus on grounding practices. Self-care and balance become crucial to prevent burnout. Investing time in meditation, nurturing relationships, taking care of one's health, specifically the eyes, heart, and digestive system, plays an integral role in aligning with the energy of this phase. 

    Moreover, the fire element strengthens the notion of collaboration. As the fire requires fuel to continue burning, it signifies a call for synergy and partnership for continuous evolution and growth. 

    Welcoming the Chinese New Year
    Apart from the 20-year cycle, the Chinese New Year ushers in the Year of the Wood Dragon, representing joy, authority, transformation, self-care, and growth. The dragon also symbolizes the harmonizing of male and female energies during this period, lending an aura of balance to the year.

    Keeping Your Space Aligned
    As the energy amid this new era shifts, it warrants a corresponding shift in our personal spaces. During this transition, keeping our homes balanced and harmonized with the era's energy becomes essential. Consider decluttering your home, doing a thorough spring cleaning, and setting up your space in alignment with the energy of the Year of the Wood Dragon.

    Welcoming a new era or a new year always carries with it a sense of renewal and transformation. As we step into the Year of the Wood Dragon and embrace the fire energy of period 9, let's remain mindful of the balance we need to maintain while riding this wave of change. Remember, your actions today dictate your tomorrow, so partake in self-care and ensure your environment is primed to support you in this transformative era. 

     

    We’ll touch on:

    • 0:00 Intro

    • 4:11 What does happiness mean to you

    • 6:58 The 20 year cycle we're in and the year of the Wood Dragon

    • 9:34 How certain elements affect different astrological signs

    • 13:01 Industries that will do best in this phase

    • 14:55 What is the significance of the cycle numbers/how does that work

    • 17:47 This 20 year cycle compared to this lunar new year

    • 20:38 What to change in your physical space at this point

    • 23:28 Big spring clean

    • 31:51 How to create a little more happiness in your day, every day, starting today

     

    Resources:

     

    Connect with Patricia

     

    Connect with Simona

     

    Happiness Happens
    enFebruary 27, 2024

    220: Addiction, Recovery, and the Law with Eric Fong

    220: Addiction, Recovery, and the Law with Eric Fong

    Eric Fong is no stranger to adversity. A renowned trial lawyer with over 25 years of experience and hundreds of high stakes civil and criminal cases under his belt, he's seen the worst life can throw at people. But the struggles were often not only in the courtrooms but also in his own life as he grappled with addiction for years. Today, however, he stands on the other side of the struggle as a beacon of hope for those who find themselves in similar hardships.

    From Lawyer to Addiction, and Back
    Eric's fascination with law sparked the beginning of his professional journey. As he hustled in the courtrooms, arguing and defending, he fell into the clutches of addiction that affected both his professional and personal life. Eric shared that he was so engrossed in addiction that he became a recluse and stopped accepting cases. The result was catastrophic – his addiction destroyed his practice, created turmoil in his personal life, and cost him his family.

    Despite several attempts at pledging sobriety, Eric always found himself relapsing. However, after realizing his behavior was rapidly spiraling out of control, he took the first decisive step towards sobriety. Eric turned to various forms of therapy, sought help, and found the 12 Steps Program to be particularly beneficial. It's been more than five years since then, and Eric now stands on the sober side of life, rebuilding not just his career but his entire existence.

    The Turnaround: Empathy and Compassion for Law
    Eric's personal journey of overcoming addiction and rejuvenating his life and career gave him an unexpected advantage – increased empathy and compassion for his cases and clients. His difficult past has allowed him to understand other people's struggles in a way that few in his profession are able to. This empathy translates into a stronger commitment towards his clients and a more understanding approach, making him a better lawyer.

    The Pitfalls of the Wrong Paths
    Eric's story draws attention to the current state of the criminal justice system, which he describes as a flawed social experiment. He believes that punishment doesn't inherently create change, and it is rather supporting, teaching, and rehabilitating individuals that truly make a difference.

    The mass incarceration problem, Eric argues, is partly a result of systemic injustice that favors the few who can afford high-quality legal help. Balancing the scales of justice and giving equal legal representation to all, in his view, is a pressing challenge.

    The Path to Happiness: Mastering Adversity
    When it comes to happiness, Eric stresses the importance of confronting one's unhappiness. The pathway to happiness is rooted in understanding and acknowledging whatever is making us unhappy, he says. We must confront our fears, the things that cause us shame or embarrassment, those aspects that prevent us from achieving happiness.

    Eric Fong's life delivers a powerful message. Overcoming addiction, rejuvenating a derailed career, and becoming a voice for justice reform – Eric's journey illustrates the innate human potential for transformation and resilience. His belief in redemption, rehabilitation, and the power of empathy offers hope and a beacon for those finding their own path out of adversity.

    It serves as a reminder that happiness doesn't come easy, it requires conquering difficult times, and it is in overcoming adversity that one can truly find the source of happiness – a source that Eric Fong found on his journey and shares with people he represents today. After all, happiness happens when we least expect it, especially when we embrace and overcome our struggles. 

    We’ll touch on:

    • 0:00 Intro

    • 4:20 What does happiness mean to you

    • 05:49 Life as a Greek Tragedy

    • 10:26 Should most offenders have the opportunity to rehabilitate?

    • 15:57 The need for creative thinking in leaders and the problem with having older leaders

    • 21:33 Eric's story with addiction

    • 25:12 The moment he decided enough was enough

    • 29:45 How his experiences have affected his work as a lawyer

    • 31:21 Keeping empathy for the people he works with

    • 33:22 Looking critically at the law

    • 36:45 One way you take care of your mental, physical, emotional, spiritual health

    • 38:58 How to create a little more happiness in your day, every day, starting today

     

    Resources:

     

    Connect with Eric

     

    Connect with Simona

     

    Happiness Happens
    enFebruary 20, 2024

    219: Stuck? Get OUT of Your Own Way with Brittany Rogars

    219: Stuck? Get OUT of Your Own Way with Brittany Rogars

    How do we get past our self-imposed limitations and focus on the present moment? This topic formed the crux of this episode on "Happiness Happens," where I had the pleasure of hosting a really powerful conversation with Brittany Rogars. 

    Creating Connections Amid Similarities
    Brittany and I had first crossed paths a year ago, and we instantly found common ground in our perspectives and attitudes towards various aspects of life. Our podcast conversation revolved around overcoming self-imposed obstacles and avoiding self-sabotage in pursuit of success. We also ventured into the territory of self-critique.

    The Power of Resilience
    Brittany's life hasn't been devoid of hardships. Raised in a family grappling with addiction, she learned the value of resilience quite early. Brittany's story significantly pivots around the tragic loss of her best friend, Kylie, to addiction in 2019, which sparked her entrepreneurial spirit. She subsequently founded a soap company supporting addiction recovery initiatives.

    However, adversity struck again when she lost her sense of smell, forcing her to close her soap company. This challenging period led Brittany towards deep introspection which helped her to realign with her passion for the dental industry. As a result, SKF Practice Solutions was born, a testament to Brittany's ability to thrive amidst change.

    Embracing Life with Family
    In her personal life, Brittany is a dedicated mother and partner to an entrepreneurial husband. Activities such as baking, reading, and exploring life with her family bring her joy. Her resilience towards life's unpredictability serves as a powerful reminder for others striving to carve out their paths of resilience and growth.

    The Happiness Equation
    We dive into different aspects of happiness. According to Brittany, happiness is about accepting the present moment, going with life's ebbs and flows, and finding comfort in the knowledge that aligning with purpose will attract universal support. This insightful perspective drew upon her personal transformation from craving safety and structure to finding joy in unpredictability.

    Striking a Balance: Personal and Professional life
    In our engaging exchange, Brittany shared her single most pertinent advice for grounding yourself – spending time alone. This self-imposed separation from external situations allows for introspection and realignment with one's core values. Such "me-time" can significantly transform how one shows up as a business owner, spouse, or parent.

    Navigating Self-Doubt and Embracing Opportunities
    Self-doubt and the tendency to self-sabotage are issues that plague many of us. Brittany shared her strategy of facing this challenge, emphasizing the need to engage with potential opportunities instead of shying away from them. According to Brittany, limitations often arise from comfort zones constructed in our minds, challenged only when we decide to step out of our safe havens.

    Our conversation with Brittany left us with a wealth of wisdom about self-discovery, handling life's challenges, and pushing beyond self-imposed boundaries. In this journey of life, remember to surround yourself with individuals who lift you up and inspire you to become better versions of yourself. Above all, remember to embrace the present moment and cherish the journey as you continue to stride forward in your pursuit of happiness.

    We’ll touch on:

    • 0:00 Intro

    • 5:32 What does happiness mean to Brittany

    • 7:15 Her tip for grounding in the moment

    • 8:11 How prioritizing herself shows up in life, business and being a mom

    • 8:51 How moments of pause allow you to react differently to situations and stress

    • 9:32 Being your own worst critic shown up in your life

    • 10:26 Why we self sabotage

    • 13:11 Accepting when you outgrow parts of your life and learning to not feel bad about that

    • 16:45 Is safety real or constructed in our minds?

    • 17:29 Advice for someone constantly self-sabotaging and getting in their own way in fear of success

    • 21:03 Following nudges from the universe

    • 23:55 Her favorite part about the life she is creating right now

    • 30:07 How to create a little more happiness in your day, every day, starting today

     

    Resources:

     

    Connect with Brittany

     

    Connect with Simona

     

    Happiness Happens
    enFebruary 13, 2024

    218: The 12 Questions for Deeper Love with Topaz Adizes

    218: The 12 Questions for Deeper Love with Topaz Adizes

    Why do our relationships only reach a certain depth? Why can we only achieve a certain level of conversation or emotional awareness within these relationships? How can we dig deeper to establish fulfilling relationships? In this episode of the Happiness Happens podcast, Topaz Adizes, an Emmy award-winning writer, director, and experienced design architect joins me for a conversation on the power of human connection.

    Topaz's work boasts a revered collection of accolades, including selections to prestigious platforms such as Cannes, Sundance, IDFA, and South by Southwest. His productions have seen features in prominent outlets such as the New Yorker Magazine, Vanity Fair, and the New York Times, earning him an Emmy for New Approaches to Documentary and two World Press Photo Awards for Immersive Storytelling and Interactive Documentary. 

    Topaz is the founder and executive director of the experiential design studio, The Skin Deep. This unique venture uses its digital channels to provide what Topaz refers to as "digital doses of humanity." Utilizing methodologies from card games to conducting face-to-face interactions, the project offers a distinctive way for people to approach communication and relationships. 

    In our discussion, Topaz touched on his new book, "The 12 Questions for Love," emphasizing the power of asking well-structured questions to facilitate a deeper understanding of each other within a relationship. According to him, the two most powerful questions from his book include, "what pain in me do you wish you could heal?" and "what experience do you wish we never had?".

    In the face of the common habit of seeking answers, Topaz advises his readers and listeners to instead focus on creating better questions. By focusing on the question, we set ourselves up for conversations that are more empowering, constructive, and provide a stronger sense of agency. Humans are incredible beings capable of adaptation, and as we continue to adapt to the changing ways of our society, we can reshape our outlook and feelings towards each other.

    The vision of Topaz echoes throughout our conversation, reminding us of the undeniable power that well-crafted questions possess. In his captivating exploration of human interaction and in-depth conversations, he opened up mesmerizing insights. At the end of the day, as Topaz suggests, creating better questions might just be the key to unlocking deeper, more meaningful relationships.

    We’ll touch on:

    • 0:00 Intro

    • 3:04 what does happiness mean to Topaz

    • 4:08 How to evaluate each moment and honor it for what it is at that time

    • 5:25 The power of human connection and what we as a society might be missing

    • 10:51 Can everyone access deep conversations?

    • 12:37 What happens when we don’t have emotional safety in a relationship

    • 20:31 Out of the 12 questions in his book, which is his favorite to ask

    • 25:35 Younger generations and their relationship with connectedness

    • 29:11 The one thing he wants readers to believe about themselves after reading his book

    • 30:14 How to create a little more happiness in your day, every day, starting today

     

    Resources:

     

    Connect with Topaz

     

    Connect with Simona

     

    Happiness Happens
    enFebruary 06, 2024

    217: You Were Born to Matter and Become Passion Struck with John R. Miles

    217: You Were Born to Matter and Become Passion Struck with John R. Miles

    In a world where time and energy are valuable commodities, finding your true passion can be a transformative experience. It's a journey that leads to a deep sense of purpose and fulfillment, ultimately contributing to your overall happiness. In this episode, we dive into a powerful conversation with John R. Miles, an expert on intentional behavior change, leadership, and personal mastery. John is the author of the book "Passion Struck," where he shares 12 powerful principles to unlock your purpose and ignite your most intentional life. Join us as we explore the nitty-gritty of discovering and living your passion every single day.

    We start the conversation by asking John what happiness means to him. He describes it as a state of mind where he wakes up energized, excited about what the day has in store. For John, living a life that he loves and aligning his actions with his passions leads to a sense of happiness and contentment.

    We delve deeper into John's daily routine, asking how he stays aligned with his passion every morning. John shares that he practices gratitude both at night and in the morning. Starting his day with a mindful walk, he immerses himself in the tranquility of nature, setting intentions and expressing gratitude. This practice grounds him and sets the tone for a day filled with excellence, enthusiasm, hope, and love.

    We explore John's personal journey of finding fulfillment. John explains that he had accomplished much in his career but realized he was on a treadmill, always chasing the next achievement. The turning point was a period of burnout, severe depression, and apathy. Seeking guidance from a psychologist and career coach, John discovered the importance of crafting a well-rounded life with multiple areas of focus. This balance included physical health, mental health, spiritual health, emotional health, and relationship health. By finding harmony in these areas, John found true contentment and happiness.

    John introduces the concept of "human mosquitoes" – the negative influences that derail our hopes and aspirations. He categorizes them into three types: "blood suckers," boundary destroyers; "invisible suffocators," pessimists; and "PITAs" (Pain in the Ass), selfish individuals. John advises setting boundaries and being consistent in their application. Recognizing these negative influences allows individuals to make informed decisions about their presence in their lives.

    John emphasizes the importance of self-awareness and utilizing one's unique strengths. He advises focusing on tasks and activities that bring joy and working on improving weaknesses without overshadowing strengths. John urges embracing the journey and learning from mistakes. By giving ourselves grace and acknowledging our significance, we can make a meaningful impact on the world.

    Discovering your passion is a deeply personal and transformative experience. It requires intentional mindset shifts, behavior changes, and deliberate actions. John R. Miles, in his book "Passion Struck," provides a roadmap to unlock your purpose and ignite your most intentional life. By practicing gratitude, setting boundaries, and finding alignment with your passions, you can create a life that brings you true happiness and fulfillment.

    Don't forget to grab a copy of John's book, "Passion Struck," and embark on your own journey of self-discovery and intentional living. Remember, your happiness and passion are within reach.

    We’ll touch on:

    • [0:00] Intro

    • [2:23] What happiness means to John

    • [5:03] Changing your life from feeling unfulfilled to filled with passion

    • [8:59] How parts of your life start to fall away when you do the inner work

    • [10:30] Three types of human mosquitoes

    • [15:24] What to do when you realize people in your life might be these mosquitoes

    • [18:12] Tips for crafting your life

    • [22:55] Why John write this book

    • [25:36] What Johns wants readers to feel after reading his book

    • [27:00] How to create a little more happiness in your day, every day, starting today

     

    Resources:

     

    Connect with John

     

    Connect with Simona

     

    Happiness Happens
    enJanuary 30, 2024

    216: 3 Ways to Start the Process of Letting Go with Susan Casey

    216: 3 Ways to Start the Process of Letting Go with Susan Casey

    In this week’s episode of the Happiness Happens podcast, I have the incredible privilege of diving deep into the human experience and exploring the pursuit of genuine joy. In this special episode, I had the honor of sitting down with Susan Casey, an extraordinary author, podcaster, speaker, and creator. Susan's work revolves around themes of grief, loss, internal well-being, and higher consciousness. Join me as I recount this transformative conversation about discovering true happiness, releasing what no longer serves us, and nurturing a deep sense of self-love.

     

    It all began with a beautiful twist of fate. Susan Casey, a passionate human seeking to start her own podcast, found me on Instagram. Together, we embarked on a journey that would lead us to create a podcast that has since evolved into a vibrant community centered around grief, loss, and personal growth. Susan's presence in my life is truly a shining beacon of light, radiating love and wisdom.

     

    In our conversation, I wasted no time in delving into the core question: "What does happiness mean to you?" Susan's response left me in awe as she emphasized the profound importance of authenticity. According to Susan, true happiness is found when we embrace our most authentic selves, inviting all emotions and experiences to shape our joy. It's about embracing the full spectrum of our humanity, rather than suppressing or avoiding certain feelings.

     

    During our discussion, we explored the dangerous habit of self-invalidation and self-judgment, and the toll it takes on our happiness and connection to self. Susan poignantly revealed how we tend to be overly critical of ourselves, dismissing and judging our own emotions. However, she urged us to practice self-love, highlighting the necessity of embracing all our experiences and offering ourselves the compassion we deserve.

     

    Seeking a deeper understanding, I raised a question about individuals who have experienced trauma or intense pain and how self-invalidation affects their healing process. Drawing upon her expertise as a therapist, Susan brought forth a perspective that resonated with me. She believes that our souls choose specific life paths and experiences for the purpose of growth, healing, and expansion, even if it may be difficult to comprehend at times.

     

    Our conversation then turned towards the concept of letting go and its profound impact on our well-being. Susan eloquently likened our ability to let emotions pass through us to a screen allowing wind to pass through. By avoiding emotional buildup and explosions, we open up space for healing and transformation. Susan emphasized the importance of nurturing a connection with our higher consciousness through practices like meditation, automatic writing, and engaging in joyful activities.

     

    As our enlightening conversation neared its end, I asked Susan for practical steps to incorporate letting go and inviting more happiness into our lives. Her response centered around the fundamental practice of self-compassion. By releasing self-judgment and embracing self-love, we lay the groundwork for growth and transformation. These acts of self-compassion allow us to authentically shine and live a life brimming with joy.

     

    My conversation with Susan Casey was nothing short of extraordinary. In her presence, I discovered the profound essence of happiness and the paramount importance of embracing authenticity. Through self-compassion, releasing what no longer serves us, and fostering a connection with our higher consciousness, we embark on a profound journey of self-discovery, healing, and unbridled joy. I hope sharing this conversation inspires you to wholeheartedly embrace your authenticity and awaken the untapped wellspring of joy within yourself. Remember, true happiness unfolds when we allow ourselves to shine authentically.

     

    We’ll touch on:

    • [0:00] Intro

    • [2:43] What does Happiness mean to Susan

    • [3:36] Does bypassing hard feelings lead to unhappiness?

    • [5:09] Why do we have the ability to invalidate ourselves and our feelings?

    • [7:51] Having more awareness of what decisions really serve us

    • [11:45] The time we need vs. the time we have

    • [19:46] 3 ways to start the process of letting go

    • [26:20] The impact of anger

    • [28:53] How to create a little more happiness in your day, every day, starting today

     

    Resources:

     

    Connect with Susan

     

    Connect with Simona

     

    Happiness Happens
    enJanuary 23, 2024

    215: Are You With a Narcissist? The Complexities of Narcissism and Divorce with Molly Rubesh (Part 2)

    215: Are You With a Narcissist? The Complexities of Narcissism and Divorce with Molly Rubesh (Part 2)

    Have you ever found yourself questioning if someone in your life is a narcissist? In today's episode, Molly Rubesh joins me to talk about this topic in the specific context of divorce. We explore various aspects of recognizing signs, understanding different behaviors, and navigating the challenging dynamics that arise. Get ready for an eye-opening discussion that could empower you or someone you know going through a similar experience.

     

    In our previous episode, Molly shared valuable insights on narcissism and its impact on relationships. If you haven't listened to it yet, we highly recommend checking it out. Today, Molly is back for a part two episode, and we pick up where we left off, diving deeper into narcissism specifically.

     

    We talk about the varying levels of narcissism and the tendency to use the term loosely. It’s important to differentiate between someone with narcissistic personality disorder and someone who simply exhibits narcissistic tendencies. Molly highlights that while dealing with individuals who possess these traits can be challenging, it is crucial to seek immediate help if you are in an abusive relationship where safety is compromised.

     

    We explore the gray areas of narcissism and the impact of social media's portrayal of the term. We also acknowledge that narcissism exists on a spectrum, and it is not black and white. Many individuals may display narcissistic traits without being diagnosed with a personality disorder. This recognition is vital to avoid labeling and to foster a deeper understanding of the complexities within relationships.

     

    The conversation delves into the experiences of individuals who have found themselves in relationships with narcissistic or narcissistic-tendency partners. Molly emphasizes that most of the people she has coached during divorce are divorcing someone with narcissistic tendencies. They discuss the telltale signs of narcissistic behavior, such as manipulating, gaslighting, and making the other person feel crazy. Simona and Molly highlight the importance of recognizing these patterns and understanding their impact on emotional well-being.

     

    We also cover empowerment for individuals dealing with narcissistic partners. Molly explains that coaching sessions offer a safe space for clients to explore their emotions and experiences honestly. We differentiate between illusions created by gaslighting and the actual truth. Additionally, we delve into the concept of codependency and guide individuals in understanding their own desires and goals, independent of the narcissistic tendencies of their partner.

     

    I raised an important question regarding the process of transitioning from awareness to taking action. The conversation shifts towards Molly explaining the process of uncovering one's truth amidst a long-term relationship or marriage. We discuss the conditioning and upbringing that shape an individual's beliefs and choices. Molly highlights the importance of questioning these beliefs, understanding the role of past experiences, and identifying what one truly desires. She emphasizes that everyone has their own version of truth and that coaching aids in uncovering this truth, leading to self-empowerment and personal growth.

     

    Molly and I also explore the common belief that staying together for the sake of the children is always the best decision. We discuss the potential fear of being alone that often underlies this choice. Molly shares her own experience, stating that children can benefit from divorced parents who are individually fulfilled rather than trapped in an unhappy marriage. The conversation highlights the importance of nurturing one's identity as a parent and as an individual, allowing children to witness empowered decision-making and autonomy.

     

    Understanding narcissism in the context of divorce is a complex journey that requires self-reflection, support, and empowerment. Molly’s valuable insights shed light on the intricacies of such relationships and offer guidance for those navigating this challenging path. 

     

    Remember, you are more than the titles society assigns you; you are worthy of happiness, fulfillment, and personal growth. Whether you choose to stay or leave, your well-being and empowerment should remain a priority. So embrace your truth, seek support, and embark on a journey of self-discovery and transformation.

     

    Molly Rubesh is a wife, blended mom of four, life coach, and author of the children's book "Is Heaven Farther Than the North Pole?"  After 20 years in the pharmaceutical and medical device industry, Molly left the corporate world to pursue a career where she could find more meaning in helping others. 

     

    Molly has had her fair share of adversity, starting with a divorce, which ended her 11-year marriage in 2017. After Molly met her now husband, his ex-wife died, leaving them to love and raise her two stepsons through the grief of their biological mother. Just as things settled down, Molly's dad died in 2021. This journey has given Molly the perspective she has today: that joy and sadness can coexist. Molly is sure that with support, we can find joy in the hard times and build a life we love. Molly encourages women to step into their fullest authenticity by going after what they want in this life.

     

    We’ll touch on:

    • [0:00] Intro

    • [2:15] Narcissistic personality disorder vs. narcissistic tendencies

    • [5:53] Navigating relationships with someone who has these tendencies 

    • [7:59] Making the shift between awareness and action

    • [10:21] How you can start to find awareness in your own situation 

    • [13:14] Thoughts on "staying together for the kids"

    • [21:39] 3 steps for someone who might be in this situation right now 

     

    Resources:

     

    Connect with Molly

     

    Connect with Simona

     

    Happiness Happens
    enJanuary 16, 2024

    214: Considering Divorce? These Tips Will Help You with Molly Rubesh

    214: Considering Divorce? These Tips Will Help You with Molly Rubesh

    Are you going through a divorce? Or maybe you know someone who is. Divorce is a challenging and painful experience that can leave us feeling lost and devastated. But what if I told you that divorce doesn't have to be a sad journey? What if I told you that you have the power to create a bright and authentic life post-divorce? In today's episode with expert Molly Rubesh, we will explore the concept of self-empowerment during divorce and how it can lead to a life full of joy and authenticity.

     

    1. Embracing the Self-Empowerment Piece of Divorce:

    Divorce can be a catalyst for personal growth and self-discovery. Molly Rubesh, a divorce coach, shares her journey of empowerment. Molly highlights the importance of recognizing that happiness comes from within and cannot be found in material things. She describes a moment of peace she experiences each night before falling asleep when she envisions her loved ones safe and content. This moment of pure bliss reminds us that happiness is a state of mind that can be cultivated even in the midst of challenging times.

     

    2. The Journey to Self-Healing and Growth:

    Molly emphasizes the need for individuals going through divorce to seek professional support, such as therapy or divorce coaching. These professionals can provide guidance and help navigate the complex emotions that arise during this process. Therapy or coaching can offer a safe space to explore and work through feelings of shame, guilt, and anger. Taking the time to heal and understand oneself is essential in overcoming the challenges of divorce and moving forward in a positive way.

     

    3. Finding Joy and Coexisting with Sadness:

    Divorce is accompanied by a mix of emotions, ranging from sadness and grief to joy and excitement for the future. Molly shares that it is okay to experience both sadness and joy simultaneously. She encourages individuals to allow themselves to feel these emotions fully and to let them flow naturally. By acknowledging and embracing these emotions, one can find moments of joy even in the midst of difficult times. Molly believes that joy and sadness can coexist, and it is through this acceptance that we can build a life that we love.

     

    4. Building Healthy Relationships and Blended Families:

    Navigating divorce becomes even more complex when children are involved. Molly provides valuable insights into co-parenting and blended families. She emphasizes the importance of creating an environment where children do not have to choose between their parents or feel pressured to take sides. Open communication, mutual respect, and creating a supportive network can foster healthy relationships within blended families. Molly's own experience demonstrates that blended families can be successful when both parents prioritize the well-being of the children and work together for their happiness.

     

    5. Embracing a New Beginning:

    Divorce marks the end of one chapter and the beginning of another. It is an opportunity for personal growth, self-reflection, and the chance to redefine one's life. Molly's story is a testament to the fact that divorce can lead to a new and fulfilling relationship. By learning from past experiences, recognizing personal strengths and weaknesses, and embracing self-awareness, individuals can create a solid foundation for a healthy and happy future.

     

    Divorce is undoubtedly a challenging and painful experience, but it also presents an opportunity for self-empowerment and personal growth. Molly Rubesh shares her own journey through divorce, highlighting the importance of finding joy amidst the sadness and embracing self-discovery. By seeking professional support, building healthy relationships, and focusing on personal growth, individuals can navigate divorce and create a bright and authentic life post-divorce. Remember, happiness happens when we choose to embrace our true selves and find joy in the journey.

     

    Molly Rubesh is a wife, blended mom of four, life coach, and author of the children's book "Is Heaven Farther Than the North Pole?"  After 20 years in the pharmaceutical and medical device industry, Molly left the corporate world to pursue a career where she could find more meaning in helping others. 

     

    Molly has had her fair share of adversity, starting with a divorce, which ended her 11-year marriage in 2017. After Molly met her now husband, his ex-wife died, leaving them to love and raise her two stepsons through the grief of their biological mother. Just as things settled down, Molly's dad died in 2021. This journey has given Molly the perspective she has today: that joy and sadness can coexist. Molly is sure that with support, we can find joy in the hard times and build a life we love. Molly encourages women to step into their fullest authenticity by going after what they want in this life.

     

    We’ll touch on:

    • [0:00] Intro

    • [2:31] What does happiness mean to Molly

    • [3:22] Why it’s so hard to find happiness within amidst divorce

    • [6:24] Processing emotions even when they are very hard to feel

    • [7:45] Molly's divorce journey

    • [11:53] Not getting stuck in anger

    • [12:59] The impact divorce has on kids

    • [19:51] Some of the biggest gifts of divorce

    • [23:07] Her relationship with her step kids

    • [25:48] Advice for someone on the fence about if divorce is their next right step

    • [27:52] One way to create a bit more happiness every day

     

    Resources:

     

    Connect with Molly

     

    Connect with Simona

     

    Happiness Happens
    enJanuary 09, 2024
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