Podcast Summary
Maintain optimal health with Athletic Greens and stay informed with Five Bullet Friday: Athletic Greens provides essential nutrients and Five Bullet Friday keeps you updated on new discoveries, both contributing to a healthier and more informed lifestyle
Both Athletic Greens and Five Bullet Friday offer valuable additions to maintain optimal health and stay informed about new discoveries. Athletic Greens, an all-in-one nutritional supplement, ensures you get essential vitamins, minerals, and other nutrients, even when whole foods aren't available. Five Bullet Friday, Tim Ferriss's email newsletter, delivers a weekly dose of the coolest finds, keeping you updated on apps, books, documentaries, and more. Additionally, subscribing to Five Bullet Friday grants you access to exclusive opportunities and events. Chip Connolly, the guest on this episode, shares his experiences transitioning from running a company to advising disruptive startups like Airbnb and founding the Modern Elder Academy, which focuses on redefining midlife experience.
Unexpected diagnosis leads to reflection on life's priorities: A diagnosis can serve as a wake-up call to reassess priorities and focus on health and purpose.
Life can unexpectedly throw challenges at us, and these challenges can serve as wake-up calls to reassess our priorities and live our lives to the fullest. This was the experience of the speaker, who was diagnosed with intermediate stage prostate cancer during a book tour. He was initially taken aback by the diagnosis, but came to see it as an opportunity to focus on his health and reflect on his purpose in life. Prostate cancer, while serious, is relatively tame compared to other types of cancer. The speaker's diagnosis forced him to consider his mortality and what he wanted to accomplish and experience in the time he had left. He saw parallels between his experience and the quote "The meaning of life is to find your gift and the purpose of life is to give it away." This quote, which the speaker had shared during lunch, resonated with him as he navigated the challenges of his diagnosis and the resulting changes in his life.
Discovering and Sharing Your Gift: Find your passion and share it with the world, as it's the true purpose of life. Creativity and design are essential in business, and your unique perspective can make a difference.
Chip Conley, a disruptor in the hospitality industry and the founder of the Modern Elder Academy, emphasizes the importance of finding and sharing your gift with the world. From his experience in commercial real estate and starting a boutique hotel company, he learned that creativity and design are essential aspects of business. Initially, he aspired to be a philosopher, but business seemed like a more practical path. Unintentionally, he entered the hotel industry at 26 and founded Joata Viv, a company with a mission statement in its name, which resonated with him. During his time at Stanford Business School, he and Seth Godin brainstormed business ideas and faced challenges due to their youth and innocence. Throughout his career, Chip has demonstrated that finding your passion and sharing it with others is the true purpose of life.
Forming a group for idea critique and brainstorming: Engaging in a group for idea critique and brainstorming can lead to valuable learning experiences, personal and professional growth, and potential future opportunities.
Forming a group or mastermind for brainstorming and idea critique can lead to valuable learning experiences beyond traditional coursework. Clarity about the group's purpose, respectful intellectual engagement, and a good time are essential ingredients for success. The group's discussions can help incubate ideas, leading to personal and professional growth. Sometimes, the seeds planted early may take time to germinate and lead to significant outcomes later in life. The speakers' experience of forming such a group during business school led them to write a book and eventually pursue entrepreneurial ventures.
Reflecting on lessons learned: Continuously reflecting on lessons learned, especially the painful ones, can lead to emotional regulation, deeper insights, and personal growth.
Continuous learning and reflection are essential practices for personal and professional growth. The speaker shares her experience of maintaining a weekly inventory of lessons learned since her mid-twenties, which she calls her "wisdom book." This practice has helped her to process emotions, regulate responses, and gain deeper insights. The speaker emphasizes that the lessons learned are not trivial, but often profound and painful. For instance, this week, she learned about emotional regulation in response to a New York Times article that she felt did not accurately represent her work. The speaker also emphasizes the importance of calm leadership during troubled times and the power of choosing one's response to stimuli. Overall, the speaker's reflection underscores the value of ongoing self-reflection and learning as a means of personal and professional growth.
Practicing emotional regulation through mindfulness and meditation: Find mindfulness practices like meditation, mantra-based techniques, loving-kindness meditation, and breathing exercises to help regulate emotions and be present in the moment.
Developing emotional regulation involves being responsive rather than reactive, and finding practices that help us get out of our brains and into the present moment. The speaker has found meditation, particularly mantra-based practices like Transcendental Meditation (TM), to be effective for him. He also emphasizes the importance of recognizing when to be in an "attain" mode versus an "attune" mode, and learning to attune ourselves to our surroundings instead of constantly striving for attainment. The speaker also recommends resources like loving-kindness meditation, Jack Kornfield's guided meditations, and Chade Meng Tan's book "Joy On Demand" for those interested in exploring these practices further. Additionally, the speaker shares his unique breathing technique using the metaphor of louvered windows in the forehead to help regulate emotions and calm the mind.
Unexpected opportunities from authentic connections: Building authentic connections can lead to unexpected opportunities. Be prepared, show genuine interest, and make the most of unexpected interactions.
Building authentic connections can lead to unexpected opportunities. The speaker shared an anecdote about meeting Richard Branson by asking about his parents and striking up a conversation. Later, this connection led to Branson reading and editing the speaker's first book. Another example given was meeting Brenda Lee, a famous country singer, at their motel in the Tenderloin district of San Francisco. These encounters demonstrate the importance of being prepared, showing genuine interest, and making the most of unexpected interactions. Whether it's in business or personal life, taking the initiative to connect with others can lead to meaningful and unexpected outcomes.
Understanding and catering to unspoken customer needs: Identifying and addressing deeper customer desires can lead to unexpected business success.
Identifying and meeting unrecognized needs of your customers can lead to unexpected business success. The Phoenix Hotel in San Francisco became a popular destination for rock and roll bands after Brenda Lee and Arlo Guthrie stayed there, but it was the offer of free massages to tour managers that really drew in business. This was a cost-effective way to cater to an unspoken need of these customers, and it helped the hotel stand out from competitors. The story illustrates that great entrepreneurs don't just meet expectations, but deliver on desires by understanding and addressing the deeper needs of their customers. This strategy, which is outlined in Bill Taylor's book "Peak," can lead to significant business growth.
Hotel Vitale's Bold Move: A Yoga Studio on the Penthouse Level: Understanding customer needs beyond expressed desires and taking calculated risks can lead to significant business success.
Being first in offering a unique feature or product, even if it seems unconventional or risky, can lead to significant success. In the case of Hotel Vitale, creating a yoga studio on the penthouse level was a bold move that initially met skepticism from investors. However, understanding the customer's needs beyond their expressed desires led to a high-demand amenity and positive media attention, ultimately making Hotel Vitale the most successful upscale hotel in San Francisco. This strategy aligns with the approach of business leaders like Henry Ford and Richard Branson, who have also taken calculated risks to innovate and differentiate themselves in their industries. By anticipating customer needs and taking calculated risks, businesses can create a valuable and memorable experience for their customers.
Investing in relationships through kindness and generosity: Successful entrepreneurs build strong networks by helping others and fostering authentic relationships, creating a positive reputation that precedes them.
Successful entrepreneurs like Sam, who have built businesses from the ground up, understand the importance of helping others and building strong relationships. Sam's actions towards Liz, a fellow entrepreneur, served as an investment in their friendship and his reputation. This "karmic capitalism" approach not only helped Liz succeed but also led to a supportive network of people who rallied behind Sam during tough times. By being generous and authentic, entrepreneurs can create a positive reputation that precedes them and fosters a community of like-minded individuals. As Sam puts it, "Your reputation is one of the few things in your life that's portable."
Realizing when to sell a business: Entrepreneurs should recognize when they've outgrown their businesses and consider new passions or endeavors to avoid feeling lost or depressed in retirement.
Entrepreneurs often tie their self-worth to their businesses, making it difficult to consider selling or moving on. Chip Conley, the former CEO of Joao de Viv, shared his experience of realizing that his identity had shifted and he was no longer fulfilled by running the company. He had built it for creativity and freedom, but after 22 years, he found himself running a large corporation with little room for those things. The decision to sell was emotionally intense, as he had been the face of the company for most of his adult life. However, he realized that his identity had moved on, and he was ready for the next chapter. It's important for entrepreneurs to recognize when they've outgrown their businesses and are no longer finding joy in them, and to move toward a new passion or endeavor to avoid feeling lost or depressed in retirement. Chip's experience shows that it's never too late to pivot and find fulfillment in a new area.
Chip Conley's Transformative Festival Experience: Despite facing adversity, finding peace and beauty can lead to personal growth and new identities. Experiencing and honoring life's moments of beauty is essential.
Chip Conley's near-death experience at a festival transformed his identity and perspective on life. Despite the challenging circumstances, including giving speeches on crutches and experiencing multiple flatline episodes, he found peace and beauty on the other side. This experience led him to write "Emotional Equations," which became a New York Times bestseller and reinforced his new identity as a writer and speaker. The experience also taught him the importance of experiencing and honoring beauty in life, even when faced with adversity. The vivid imagery of the light and oil casting kaleidoscope colors on the wall remained a significant memory from this transformative moment.
Finding meaning in suffering and creating meaningful moments: Reflecting on suffering and identifying lessons can provide meaning and reduce despair. Manage anxiety with the equation anxiety = uncertainty x powerlessness and disappointment = expectations - reality.
Creating meaningful moments in life and finding meaning in suffering are essential for personal growth. The speaker shared her experience of realizing this during a hospital stay, where she reflected on the book "Man's Search for Meaning" by Viktor Frankl. She discovered that meaning reduces despair, and the practice of identifying lessons from her experiences was a valuable source of meaning. The speaker also shared two equations from the book: anxiety equals uncertainty times powerlessness and disappointment equals expectations minus reality. These equations help understand and manage anxiety and disappointment, respectively. Overall, the speaker emphasized the importance of finding meaning in life's challenges and creating moments of beauty and gratitude.
Understanding motivations for simple living: Success doesn't guarantee a simple life, intentional choices and self-awareness are key to embracing simplicity.
Living a simple and still life is a conscious choice, not an automatic result of past successes or age. The speaker, who has had a successful career and now runs a midlife wisdom school in Baja, California, reflects on the importance of understanding one's motivations and intentions behind actions. He shares how his own drive to succeed led him to make big changes in his life, from selling a hotel company to joining Airbnb and starting the modern elder academy. However, he emphasizes the importance of being aware of one's ego and legacy, and making deliberate choices in executing on new ideas. The speaker also acknowledges the challenges of learning to be still and simple, and the potential benefits of midlife wisdom schools as a place for lifelong learning and growth.
Redefining Midlife: From Crisis to Marathon: The concept of midlife has changed, and people are seeking ways to navigate it as a long journey of personal growth and rejuvenation, rather than a crisis.
The concept of a midlife crisis has evolved as people are living longer. Coined in 1965, midlife was once defined as being between 45 and 65 years old. However, with increased longevity, midlife is now considered to be from 35 to 75. This new definition comes from the feeling of being overwhelmed by the accumulation of responsibilities, identities, and possessions, leading to a reset. Midlife is no longer a crisis but a marathon, and people are looking for ways to navigate it. The Modern Elder Academy is an example of a "pit stop" for people in midlife, offering a place for personal growth and rejuvenation. The academy is also intended to inspire other social entrepreneurs to create similar institutions around the world. Chip Conley's goal is to address ageism and help people thrive in midlife, and he plans to expand beyond his current location.
The Unexpected Pleasures and Wisdom of Aging: Happiness declines in midlife but increases in later years due to editing mode and improved brain function, allowing for wise decision making and distilling complex information.
Aging can bring unexpected pleasures and wisdom, despite societal narratives suggesting otherwise. The U-curve of happiness theory, which has been proven in most countries except Russia, shows that happiness declines from age 25 to around 45, then begins to increase with each successive decade. This is due to the editing mode people enter in midlife, discarding things and focusing on what truly matters. The aging brain may have less recall, but it becomes more adept at synthesizing and thinking holistically. This ability can be beneficial in distilling down complex information and making wise decisions, as demonstrated by Airbnb's reduction from 30 strategic initiatives to four. Creating a midlife wisdom school or similar institution could be a meaningful legacy, helping people aspire to aging and discover the joys and wisdom it brings.
Discovering Essence through 'What Business Are We In?' exercise: Through the 'What Business Are We In?' exercise, organizations and individuals can define their essence and adapt to new opportunities by reframing their mindset in midlife, promoting modern eldership.
Curiosity and wisdom, combined as modern eldership, can help organizations distill important initiatives down to their essence. This was achieved through an exercise called "What business are we in?" where participants were asked to answer the question five times, each time in a different way. This exercise helped Airbnb define their mantra as a place where people can belong anywhere, and it can also be applied to individuals to discover their personal mastery. The Academy, in general, encourages individuals to reframe their mindset in midlife to adapt to new opportunities. The idea of modern eldership and the "What business are we in?" exercise can be valuable tools for any organization or individual seeking clarity and direction.
Identifying and letting go of limiting beliefs: Explore and release outdated mindsets through writing, sharing, and conversations to foster personal growth and evolution
Evolving is the first step towards personal growth, and it involves identifying and letting go of mindsets or beliefs that no longer serve us. This process can be facilitated through exercises like writing down and sharing name tags representing these outdated beliefs, and having conversations about why they are no longer useful. This liminal experience helps individuals transition into something new, leading to a deeper understanding of themselves and their goals. At the Modern Elder Academy, participants engage in such exercises and mindfulness practices to calm their nervous system and evolve out of limiting beliefs.
Exploring Identity and Values in the Modern Elder Program: The Modern Elder program encourages self-discovery and authenticity through identity exploration and values inventory, offering a supportive environment for personal growth and professional development.
The Modern Elder program encourages participants to undergo an identity cleanse and values inventory before joining the cohort. During the program, they prioritize their values and ways of being, which can change over time. Accountability partners and weekly Zoom calls help individuals reflect on their values and how they've shifted. Personal stories, like the speaker's experience coming to terms with his sexuality, highlight the importance of self-discovery and authenticity in the process. The Modern Elder program offers a safe space for individuals to explore their identities and values, fostering personal growth and professional development.
Personal readiness and life circumstances impact decisions: Approaching the end of a career, a man reconsidered being a sperm donor for a self-sufficient couple, forming deep bonds and expanding his family.
Life circumstances and personal readiness can significantly influence decisions, even those that were previously considered off-limits. The speaker, who had previously declined offers to be a sperm donor, reconsidered when he was approaching the end of a long business career and felt a desire for a new role. The women who asked for his help were self-sufficient and clear about their intentions, which allowed for a unique co-parenting arrangement. The outcome was unexpectedly deep, with the speaker forming strong bonds with the boys. Previous experiences, such as being a foster parent, may have influenced his ability to connect with the children. Ultimately, the speaker's openness to new experiences led to a meaningful expansion of his family.
Guiding younger generations and embracing change: Stay instinctive yet mindful, embrace the unknown, and remain curious and wise to adapt in today's world.
Having the responsibility of guiding and loving younger generations can be a humbling experience that helps us get out of our egos and embrace change. This was highlighted by the speaker's experience of raising a child with his Israeli partner, who was a different race and sexual orientation, and the evolution of family structures over the last few decades. The speaker emphasized the importance of being instinctive yet mindful in parenting, embracing the unknown, and staying curious and wise to remain relevant in today's world. Books like "Man's Search for Meaning," "The Hundred Year Life," "The Happiness Curve," and "Setting the Table" have been gifted by the speaker due to their practical and philosophical insights. The speaker also shared his belief that markets are a form of meditation and a source of learning.
Embrace the elder years as a time of growth and wisdom: Seneca encourages us to make the most of our time by pursuing new passions and experiences, embracing our age, and finding peace through Stoic philosophy.
According to Seneca, it's not the shortness of life that matters most, but rather how we choose to spend it. As we age, it's essential to recognize that we're not wasting time, but instead, living a significant portion of our lives. For instance, if you're 58 and plan to live to 98, you've only lived half of your adult life. Therefore, it's crucial to make the most of the time we have by pursuing new passions and experiences. Moreover, embracing our age and the depth of emotions and spiritual connections that come with it can lead to greater happiness. Anxiety and fear of aging can be paralyzing, but learning to accept and even embrace the inevitable can lead to a more fulfilling life. Stoic philosophy, as practiced by Marcus Aurelius, can help us separate what we can control from what we cannot and find peace in the face of uncertainty and mortality. So, instead of fearing aging, we should strive to live fully and embrace the elder years as a time of growth and wisdom. Therefore, my advice is to be yourself, live in the present, and make the most of every moment, no matter your age. Embrace the elder and live a meaningful life.
Tim Ferriss' Weekly Email Recommendations: Tim Ferriss curates and shares valuable articles, books, and tools every week in his Five-Bullet Friday email to help his audience discover new resources and improve their lives.
That Tim Ferriss, the host of the Tim Ferriss Show, shares a weekly curated email called the "Five-Bullet Friday." This email includes his favorite articles, books, and tools that he has discovered and found valuable. He describes it as a "tiny bite of goodness" before the weekend. If you're interested in receiving this email, simply visit fourhourworkweek.com and enter your email address. Ferriss hopes that his readers will enjoy and find value in the content he shares. This practice of curating and sharing valuable information is a way for Ferriss to give back to his audience and help them discover new resources to improve their lives.