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    84. “We spend 98% of what we make—but we refuse to change our lifestyle”

    enFebruary 28, 2023
    What is the main focus of designing a rich life?
    How did Christine and Thomas describe their financial situation?
    What percentage did the financial advisor charge Christine and Thomas?
    Which apps does Ramit use for budget management?
    What did Christine do to manage her coffee expenses?

    Podcast Summary

    • Designing a rich life goes beyond managing moneyUnderstanding what truly matters to us is essential for designing a rich life, not just managing money effectively.

      Designing a rich life goes beyond just managing money and involves understanding what truly matters to us. Ramit Sethi, the host of the podcast, shared his upcoming events in Philadelphia and Boston, where he will help people design their rich lives using his journal. He emphasized that money doesn't have to be boring and that many people, like Christine and Thomas, are living above their means without realizing it. Christine and Thomas, a couple with three young children, described their financial situation as stressful and were unaware of the severity of their situation. Ramit expressed concern about their financial situation and encouraged listeners to watch his YouTube episode for a full understanding. The host also shared his personal relationship with money, which he described as stressful and a daily cause of anxiety. He uses apps like YNAB and Google Sheets to manage his budget and check his accounts regularly for peace of mind. Overall, the key takeaway is that managing money is just one aspect of designing a rich life, and it's essential to understand what we truly value to live a fulfilling life.

    • Balancing Financial Monitoring and Relaxation in RelationshipsEffective financial management involves open communication, balance between monitoring and relaxation, and agreement on financial goals to reduce stress and anxiety.

      Effective financial management involves constant monitoring and communication between partners, but it can also bring stress and anxiety. Christine and Thomas, for instance, have different approaches to managing their finances. Christine is more anxious and checks their accounts multiple times a day, while Thomas is more avoidant and prefers not to focus on finances in the morning. Their communication style around money is common in relationships, with the anxious partner bringing up money frequently and the avoidant partner feeling overwhelmed by the perceived constant discussion. Despite the stress, both partners agree that having a cushion in their finances would allow them to feel more comfortable and reduce the need for constant checking. Effective financial management requires a balance between monitoring and relaxation, as well as open and honest communication between partners.

    • Effective Tools and Communication for Financial SuccessRegular financial discussions, utilizing helpful resources, and finding balance between management and personal time can lead to financial success and well-being

      Having the right tools and resources can significantly enhance our experiences, whether it's booking memorable travel activities through Viator or improving our sleep quality with 8 Sleep's high-tech pod cover. The importance of effective communication and planning, as demonstrated through regular budget meetings, can also contribute to better financial management. However, finding the balance between managing finances and personal time is essential. Christine reached out to Ramit for advice due to feeling overwhelmed with their current financial situation. While they used to have weekly budget meetings and were in a better financial position, they no longer prioritize this practice. The correlation between regular financial discussions and improved financial standing is worth considering. Ultimately, having open conversations about finances, utilizing helpful resources, and finding a balance between financial management and personal time can lead to greater financial success and overall well-being.

    • Managing Finances in a Relationship: The Hidden StruggleOpen communication and teamwork are crucial for managing finances in a relationship. Avoiding discussions and negative perspectives can lead to stress and unhealthy habits.

      The fear of upcoming expenses and the burden of managing finances alone can cause significant stress and feelings of isolation in a relationship. The speaker's husband, Thomas, wants to avoid thinking about money and prefers not to discuss it. However, their financial situation has become more complicated with increasing expenses and debt. The speaker feels overwhelmed and alone in managing their finances, leading to feelings of sadness and loneliness. It's essential to communicate openly about finances and work together to address financial challenges. Avoiding money discussions and viewing it as a negative can lead to misunderstandings, stress, and unhealthy financial habits. Couples should aim to change their perspective on money and view it as a tool for achieving their goals and building a secure future.

    • Thomas's negative perspective towards moneyThomas's lack of perspective towards money leads to a tight budget and high debt. To improve, they need to increase income, reduce expenses, or both.

      Thomas's perspective towards money is rooted in his inability to see the big picture. He equates money with negative experiences and lacks the perspective to understand that it's a necessary part of life with ups and downs. The conversation also reveals that the couple's expenses have significantly increased, leading to a tight budget and high debt. Their combined income of $133,000 a year, with $394,000 in debt, leaves them with only 2% wiggle room in their budget. To improve their financial situation, they need to increase their income, reduce expenses, or both. Understanding the importance of having a financial cushion and perspective towards money could help them make better financial decisions and ultimately reach their financial goals.

    • High fixed expenses limit savings and financial freedomIdentifying and reducing fixed costs is crucial for financial freedom. Focus on total cost of ownership instead of monthly payments for large purchases.

      High fixed expenses can lead to significant financial stress and limit one's ability to save and enjoy life. In the case of Christine and Thomas, their expenses, particularly on childcare and a high-end car, make up nearly 100% of their take-home income. This leaves them unable to save for emergencies or future goals, and forces them to live paycheck to paycheck. The speaker emphasizes the importance of identifying and reducing these fixed costs, and advocates for a focus on total cost of ownership rather than monthly payments when making large purchases. By doing so, individuals can gain financial freedom and live more fulfilling lives.

    • Hidden costs of large purchasesMonthly payments don't reflect total cost of ownership for large purchases, so calculate it beforehand. Tools like Superhuman can save time and boost productivity.

      Making decisions based on monthly payments alone can lead to unexpected and hidden costs in the long run. This is particularly true for large purchases like houses and cars, which have significant phantom costs. For instance, a $75,000 truck financed with a 5-year loan at 5.5% interest and no down payment would result in a total cost of ownership of approximately $91,000. Extending the loan term to 7 years to lower monthly payments would result in an even higher total cost of ownership. Therefore, it's crucial to calculate the total cost of ownership before making a purchase. Additionally, using tools like email software Superhuman can save time and increase productivity. Peak Tea, a sponsor, offers a high-quality tea experience with minimal preparation, allowing consumers to enjoy the care and love put into each cup.

    • Prioritizing Debt Repayment and Avoiding 0% OffersPay off debts quickly to avoid retroactive interest and potential financial pitfalls. Valuable financial lessons from upbringing can inform smart financial decisions.

      It's important to prioritize debt repayment and avoid relying too heavily on 0% offers. PEEK tea, which dissolves instantly in hot or cold water, is a convenient solution for travelers. Meanwhile, the discussion also touched on the importance of addressing debt and the potential consequences of missing payments. Credit card companies often have fine print that can result in retroactive interest if the term isn't met exactly. It's crucial to pay off debts as quickly as possible to avoid these pitfalls. Additionally, the conversation highlighted the importance of valuing financial lessons from upbringing and using them to make informed financial decisions. The speaker shared that their parents, who were extremely frugal, instilled in them the importance of saving and living below their means.

    • Lessons from parents on saving and living below meansGrowing up, parents instilled values of saving and living below means. Now, despite a large house and fixed costs exceeding income, finding ways to increase income or reduce expenses is necessary.

      Growing up, Christine and her siblings learned the importance of saving and living below their means from their parents, who had managed to amass a significant retirement fund despite not earning high salaries. Christine carries these lessons with her today, prioritizing experiences for her children while also finding ways to save in other areas. However, in their current situation, they have a large house that is a significant expense, and their fixed costs exceed their take-home income. While they value their home as their forever home, they may need to consider increasing their income or finding ways to reduce expenses in order to make it work in their conscious spending plan. Despite having grown up in smaller houses themselves, Christine and her partner now have a much larger one, which highlights the importance of balancing values and financial realities.

    • Couple discusses making adjustments to spendingRecognizing the need to adjust spending, couples should consider smaller sacrifices to free up more money for their budget, even if it means letting go of attachments.

      The couple recognized the need to make adjustments in their spending to improve their financial situation, but were hesitant to make significant changes to their lifestyle. They acknowledged their love for their jobs and their desire to provide a good childhood for their children. Christine's guilt-free spending was found to be negative 10%, leading to a loss of hundreds of dollars each month. The couple discussed selling one of their vehicles to reduce expenses, but found it difficult to let go of things they had grown attached to. Ultimately, they agreed to consider making smaller sacrifices, such as reducing their car payments, to free up more money for their overall budget. The conversation highlighted the importance of reevaluating spending habits and being open to making adjustments, even if it meant giving up something that was once a dream or source of pride.

    • Underestimating the impact of major expensesMaking small changes to fixed costs may not significantly impact your financial situation. Instead, focus on making larger changes to address major expenses that contribute to high fixed costs.

      Focusing too much on small changes to fixed costs may not significantly impact one's financial situation. In the discussion, Thomas and Christine analyzed Thomas's expenses and found that by reducing his car payment, they could lower his fixed costs from $953 to $753. However, they realized that this change was not as impactful as they thought, and more significant changes would be required to make a noticeable difference in their financial situation. Christine shared that their expenses had accumulated over time due to major decisions such as buying a new house, getting a new job, and having multiple dogs and children. They had believed they could afford these expenses as they expected to make more money as they got older. However, they ended up taking a job that paid less than they anticipated, leaving them living on a tight budget. The conversation highlighted the importance of being aware of the decisions that lead to high fixed costs and the need to make larger changes to improve one's financial situation.

    • Understanding the long-term implications of financial decisionsBeing financially literate and considering long-term consequences can help avoid financial traps and ensure financial stability

      Many people, like Christine and Thomas, find themselves trapped in a cycle of making episodic one-time decisions about big purchases without considering the long-term financial implications. This can lead to feelings of being unable to afford desired experiences and a sense of financial instability. Christine and Thomas's experience with hiring a financial advisor without fully understanding the fees is a common occurrence. The advisor charged them 2% per year, which amounts to over 50% of their returns going to the advisor. This situation highlights the importance of being financially literate and understanding the long-term implications of financial decisions. Christine's solution to her coffee obsession, where she sets up a system to discover new coffee regularly, can be applied to other areas of life to help make informed decisions and avoid financial traps.

    • Upgrade your daily routine with better coffee and educationFocus on reducing fixed costs, investing consistently, and prioritizing a financially secure future

      Improving your daily life can be as simple as discovering better coffee with Trade or learning from the world's greatest instructors on MasterClass. However, it's essential to focus on long-term goals instead of just managing small everyday expenses. The real issue is often high fixed costs and insufficient investments. To manage your money effectively, prioritize reducing fixed costs, investing consistently, and focusing on designing your rich life. While it may seem daunting, engaging with money and understanding these critical areas is crucial for your livelihood, alongside family and health. So, upgrade your coffee and education to enhance your daily routine and work towards a financially secure future. And as a special offer, use the links drinktrade.com/ramit and masterclass.com/ramit for a free bag of coffee with any subscription purchase or two memberships for the price of one, respectively.

    • Considering top priorities and intentional spendingIdentify what truly matters, make intentional spending choices, and work towards a more fulfilling life by focusing on priorities like experiences, desired house amenities, vacations, and retirement savings.

      While focusing on our bottom line expenses and making decisions based on what's in front of us can help us get by, it's also important to consider our top priorities and give ourselves permission to spend more in those areas if we can afford it. Christine's example shows how a series of decisions can limit our vision of a rich life, and we may not even realize it. By taking the time to identify what truly matters to us, we can make more intentional spending choices and work towards a more fulfilling life. For instance, Christine's rich life includes being able to spend significant amounts on experiences, a house with desired amenities, vacations, and retirement savings. Understanding and focusing on these priorities can make a big difference in our financial journey.

    • Retirement Planning: Understanding Financial Goals and CalculationsClear financial goals and calculations for retirement are crucial for effective savings strategies and better financial outcomes. Prioritize investments, focus on long-term planning, and challenge assumptions to ensure resources are used effectively.

      Understanding the financial goals and calculations for retirement is crucial, as it can significantly impact one's lifestyle and savings strategies. During the conversation, it became clear that having a clear grasp of how much money is needed for retirement and what return rate to expect is essential. The discussion also highlighted the importance of prioritizing investments and focusing on long-term financial planning, rather than just managing expenses day-to-day. It's easy to get caught up in the present and neglect planning for the future, but engaging in this process can lead to better financial outcomes. It's important to challenge assumptions and reconsider priorities to ensure that resources are being used effectively towards long-term goals.

    • Couple's High Fixed CostsCouple spent 98% of income on fixed costs, advised to reduce expenses on truck/van, eating out, subscriptions, utilities, and DIRECTV to reach recommended 60%.

      The couple's high fixed costs are preventing them from saving enough money and investing for their future. The conversation highlighted that they were spending 98% of their take-home income on fixed costs, leaving little to no room for savings or unexpected expenses. The financial advisor suggested they discuss potential adjustments, such as lowering payments for their truck and van, cutting back on eating out and subscriptions, and reevaluating expenses like utilities and DIRECTV. By the end of the conversation, they had managed to reduce their fixed costs to 83% of their income, but there was still a long way to go to reach the recommended 60%. The advisor emphasized the importance of acknowledging their current spending habits and working together to make changes to build the life they desired.

    • Prioritize the big things in lifeFocus on major expenses and experiences, communicate effectively, and align spending with your 'rich life' vision for financial stability and reduced stress.

      Focusing on small expenses while neglecting larger, more impactful decisions can lead to unnecessary stress and financial instability. The speaker emphasizes the importance of being decisive and prioritizing the big things in life, such as family, experiences, and health, when making spending decisions. They also suggest using a broad-stroke approach instead of a fine-point pencil to make significant changes. The conversation also touched on the importance of defining one's "rich life" and aligning spending with that vision. Additionally, the discussion highlighted the need for effective communication and teamwork when it comes to managing finances. The speaker encouraged the listeners to reflect on their mindset towards money and consider adopting a more strategic and holistic approach to budgeting and spending.

    • Effective communication and teamwork lead to progress in managing personal financesEffective communication, goal setting, and making sacrifices can help reduce fixed costs from 97% to 80% of income in managing personal finances.

      Effective communication and teamwork can lead to significant progress in managing personal finances. Thomas and Christine, after recognizing their focus on small details and understanding each other's feelings towards money, made sacrifices such as selling their Jeep, canceling gymnastics, and reducing groceries. They set goals to reduce their fixed costs, aiming for 60-65% within a year. Their recent updates showed progress, with a sold Jeep, canceled gymnastics, and reduced mortgage payments. They now have weekly budget meetings and have made changes like raises, side jobs, and tax deductions. Their fixed costs have decreased from 97% to 80% of their income. By listening to the IWT podcast and implementing these strategies, they feel more connected and in control of their finances. For those looking to take control of their money, Ramit Sethi encourages starting with his book and, for faster progress, joining his money coaching program. Effective communication, goal setting, and making sacrifices are key to managing personal finances effectively.

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    Taylor is 39 and Steve is 42. They're married and live in New York City. Steve lost his job years ago, but has coasted without getting serious about his career. Taylor’s done the opposite—and now she’s ready to buy a home. Does Steve have what it takes to make a change for their future? This episode is brought to you by: Rocket Money | Stop throwing your money away. Cancel unwanted subscriptions – and manage your expenses the easy way – by going to https://rocketmoney.com/ramit. LMNT | Right now, LMNT is offering 8 single serving packets FREE with any LMNT order. This is a great way to try all 8 flavors. Get yours at https://drinklmnt.com/RAMIT. ZocDoc | Download the ZocDoc app for FREE at https://zocdoc.com/ramit then find and book a top-rated doctor today. Grammarly | Easier said? Done. Save time with one click. Sign up and download for free at https://grammarly.com/ramit  Trust & Will | Secure your assets and protect your loved ones. Get 10% off plus free shipping on your estate plan documents by visiting https://trustandwill.com/ramit   Links mentioned in this episode • Sign up for my free "How to build a second income stream" webinar on July 15th • “We panic over money—but spend $84K/year on travel and shopping” #162 • “Our gas is about to get shut off, but I refuse to sell any of my 7 cars” #151  Connect with Ramit • Get the Podcast Newsletter and exclusive Q&A about the show • Get Money Coaching with Ramit  • Download the Conscious Spending Plan • Listen to my book—now on Audible • Get my New York Times best-selling book • Get my no-numbers journal • Other episodes • Instagram • Twitter • YouTube If you and your partner have a money issue and you want my help, I occasionally select a couple to work with, free of charge. Apply for my help here. Produced by Crate Media.

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    139. Lose Yourself: The Secret to Finding Flow and Being Fully Present

    139. Lose Yourself: The Secret to Finding Flow and Being Fully Present

    Whether you're looking to boost your productivity, find more joy in your work, or simply be more present in the moment, you need flow — and research by Assistant Professor David Melnikoff could help you find it.

    Melnikoff investigates how we pursue our goals, and how flow — the state of being totally immersed and engaged in what we’re doing — can help us achieve them. According to him, flow isn’t necessarily about enjoying a task or activity for its own sake, but more about the process of discovery that unfolds as we take action in the face of uncertainty. “The source of flow is engaging in an activity that allows you to reduce uncertainty about your future, engaging in actions that reduce possible future outcomes, or ideally, eliminate all possible future outcomes except for one,” he says. With each action that we take, the path before us narrows, leading us more directly to the goal that we’ve set.

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    Episode Reference Links:

    Connect:


    Chapters:

    (00:00:00) Introduction

    Host Matt Abraham welcomes guest David Melnikoff, an assistant professor of organizational behavior at Stanford GSB and an expert on flow and goal achievement.

    (00:00:40) Understanding Flow and Its Benefits

    The definition of flow and the reversal of the usual dynamic of goal pursuit.

    (00:02:20) Achieving and Maintaining Flow

    Misconceptions about achieving flow and the role of reducing uncertainty in engaging activities. 

    (00:06:22) Flow in Business and Leadership

    Applying flow principles to business, emphasizing the structuring of tasks and goals to induce flow through uncertainty reduction. 

    (00:08:39) Personal Applications of Flow for Goal Pursuit

    How to utilize flow principles to set and achieve goals with advice on framing tasks to maximize uncertainty and flow. 

    (00:11:03) Collaborative Flow and Communication

    The potential for shared flow experiences in collaborative settings and the role of communication in facilitating flow.

    (00:13:05) Goal Setting and Achievement Advice

    Advice on goal setting, advocating for goals with a degree of uncertainty to enhance engagement and likelihood of entering a flow state.

    (00:14:43) The Final Three Questions

    David Melnikoff shares how he invites flow into his life, a communicator he admires, and his recipe for communication.

    (00:16:17) Conclusion


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    [6] Se fixer des objectifs : Clarifier ses objectifs

    [6] Se fixer des objectifs : Clarifier ses objectifs

    CLARIFIER SES OBJECTIFS 

    Dans cette deuxième thématique on rentre dans le dur. Il est l'heure de se fixer des objectifs et développer sa productivité. Pas de panique, on y va petit à petit et surtout dans la bonne humeur. 

    Dans ce podcast, découvrez quelques outils qui vous permettront d'y voir plus clair et de savoir ce qui est la priorité pour VOUS.

    Vous pouvez aussi laisser une note et un commentaire sur iTunes, Apple Podcast ou votre plateforme d'écoute 😊 A bientôt ! 

    Camille et Sophie

    ~~~~

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    💌Nous contacter par email 

    ✨ -15% sur tout le site www.mymellowdays.com jusqu'au 17 octobre 2020 avec le code MARRADE15 !

    What Did We Achieve Last Year | How To Measure If You're Getting Better

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    Timeline:
    (0:00) - Intro
    (1:08) - Measuring the unquantifiable
    (6:53) - Setting a goal around something unknown
    (14:55) - How Juan went last year
    (20:53) - Boostagram Lounge
    (26:21) - Library of Babel
    (30:50) - Kyrin's 2023 goals
    (33:11) - Good, bad & neutral
    (44:39) - Effort vs achievement
    (52:53) - Motivating yourself
    (59:41) - Fitness challenge
    (1:03:01) - Summary
    (1:08:23) - V4V: Support via the 3T's


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