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    About this Episode

    Fantasy is a big part of love addiction; it's what keeps us hooked in our co-addicted relationships as we try to make a partner into who we want them to be instead of accepting the reality of who they are.

    In this episode, Jodi discusses the role of fantasy in love addiction, how it 'works', and how it all begins in childhood as a way to escape.

    Music by JD Pendley

    Recent Episodes from Journals of a Love Addict Podcast

    EP44: Most Codependable

    EP44: Most Codependable
    Love addiction comes with a set of symptoms, leading to a pattern of dysfunctional relationships; whether we tend to be more anxious or more avoidant (or both), we may find ourselves in the push/pull of addictive relationships more than once. Then, after each relationship we say "I'll never do that again", fully intending to make some changes, but...
     
    Even if we enter love addiction recovery and address the symptoms, we may still find that we're unknowingly driven by outdated messages telling us who we're supposed to be and how we're supposed to live our lives. Why? Because of inherited cultural beliefs that infiltrate our decision-making.
     
    In this episode, Jodi discusses these cultural beliefs--how they fuel love addiction, and can meddle with life in recovery, too. She also reviews the symptoms of codependence and love addiction, and talks about the impact that seemingly benign labels can have on kids.
     
     
    Show notes and resources:
     
    Music by JD Pendley
     
    Jodi's website: jodiwhiteonline.com
     
    References: Facing Codependence and Facing Love Addiction by Pia Mellody; Ready to Heal by Kelly McDaniel
     
    Album mentioned: Just a Girl by No Doubt
     
    Disclaimer:
     
    This podcast is shared for educational and informational purposes only. It is not intended to be a substitute for mental health treatment with a licensed mental health professional or to be used in place of the advice of a physician. If you are struggling please don't delay in seeking the assistance of a licensed mental health practitioner or healthcare professional.  If you're in crisis please visit NAMI.org or call 1-800-273-TALK for 24-hour assistance.

    EP43: LYLAS

    EP43: LYLAS

    The term 'love addiction' is often referred to in the context of romantic relationships, but did you know that the symptoms can apply to platonic relationships, too?

    In this episode, Jodi talks about her history with undervaluing herself in friendships and overlooking red flags in order to belong and be the "best friend". She's joined by her friend Brooke (from "A Breakup Story"), to discuss the complexity of female friendships past and present.

    Show notes and resources:

    Music by JD Pendley

    Jodi's website: jodiwhiteonline.com

    NYT article: What To Do If A Friend Ghosts You by Catherine Pearson

    Books referenced: Facing Love Addiction by Pia Mellody and Mother Hunger by Kelly McDaniel

    Disclaimer:

    This podcast is shared for educational and informational purposes only. It is not intended to be a substitute for mental health treatment with a licensed mental health professional or to be used in place of the advice of a physician. If you are struggling please don't delay in seeking the assistance of a licensed mental health practitioner or healthcare professional.  If you're in crisis please visit NAMI.org or call 1-800-273-TALK for 24-hour assistance. 

    EP42: Talking About Blocking with Leah Aguirre, LCSW

    EP42: Talking About Blocking with Leah Aguirre, LCSW

    Have you ever needed to block someone? Maybe you ended a relationship and no longer wanted to see their social media activity, or maybe you found yourself needing to have a hard boundary with a former friend. In today's world, considering that most of us are accessible on multiple platforms, it's not uncommon to block another person...BUT, that doesn't mean it's always easy to do (for a number of reasons).

    Blocking is an important topic, so Jodi invited trauma therapist, Leah Aguierre--someone who talks openly about the subject on social media--to join her for a conversation. On this episode Jodi and Leah cover why we struggle with the idea of blocking, four reasons why blocking can be helpful in certain situations, and they share personal experiences with blocking.

    Show notes and resources:

    Music by JD Pendley

    You can learn more about Leah here leahaguierrelcsw.com and on Instagram @leahaguirrelcsw

    Jodi's website: jodiwhiteonline.com

    Disclaimer:

    This podcast is shared for educational and informational purposes only. It is not intended to be a substitute for mental health treatment with a licensed mental health professional or to be used in place of the advice of a physician. If you are struggling please don't delay in seeking the assistance of a licensed mental health practitioner or healthcare professional. If you're in crisis please visit NAMI.org or call 1-800-273-TALK for 24-hour assistance. 

    EP41: The Three Whys with Nicole Lewis-Keeber

    EP41: The Three Whys with Nicole Lewis-Keeber

    You may have heard about the importance of your 'why'--that thing that motivates you and provides a sense of purpose in life and work. But what if that concept was broken down even further, into three parts that took you deeper into that 'why'?

    Nicole Lewis-Keeber (therapist, coach & author) has done just that, and she talks with Jodi in this episode of the podcast about The Three Whys. Jodi also shares an early experience that took her away from her Why, and a little about the process of getting back to it.

    Show notes and resources:

    Music by JD Pendley

    Learn more about Nicole and download her book, "The Three Whys", here.

    Jodi mentions this book by Stephen Cope.

    Follow Jodi on Instagram @jodiwhite_

    Disclaimer:

    This podcast is shared for educational and informational purposes only. It is not intended to be a substitute for mental health treatment with a licensed mental health professional or to be used in place of the advice of a physician. If you are struggling please don't delay in seeking the assistance of a licensed mental health practitioner or healthcare professional.  If you're in crisis please visit NAMI.org or call 1-800-273-TALK for 24-hour assistance. 

     

    EP40: That Therapist (A Conversation with Dr. Lara Dye)

    EP40: That Therapist (A Conversation with Dr. Lara Dye)

    If you're a listener of the podcast, then you've heard Jodi talk about 'that therapist'--the one she worked with in 2016, who taught her about love addiction, supported her through withrawal, and played a vital role in her in early recovery.

    That therapist is Dr. Lara Dye, a Pia Mellody-trained psychologist specializing in love & sex addiction, limerence--and who has personal experience with love addiction recovery. And, because she was such an important part of Jodi's recovery journey, she invited Dr. Dye to talk with her for this episode of the podcast.

    Music by JD Pendley

     

    EP39: Intimacy Intolerance with Kelly McDaniel

    EP39: Intimacy Intolerance with Kelly McDaniel

    What is intimacy? If you Google the term you might find varying--yet similar--definitions...but what does it mean to YOU?

    In this episode, Kelly McDaniel (author of "Ready to Heal" and "Mother Hunger") is back to talk with Jodi regarding what intimacy really is, and the reason why in love addiction--although we might crave closeness--we struggle to tolerate authentic intimacy.

    Music by JD Pendley

    EP38: Pretty Baby (A Mother Hunger Conversation)

    EP38: Pretty Baby (A Mother Hunger Conversation)

    Have you seen the Hulu documentary, "Pretty Baby: Brooke Shields"? It paints a powerful portrait of Brooke's sexualization as a child actor, and brings attention to the waters in which young women swim from a young age. In this docuseries, Brooke Shields discusses the highs and lows of her career, and provides insight into the complex relationship with her mother.

    On this episode of the podcast, Jodi is joined by her friend, Brooke, to discuss "Pretty Baby" through a lens of Mother Hunger (because we can't understand love addiction without talking about Mother Hunger). Even if you haven't watched the documentary, you'll get something out of this one.

    Music by JD Pendley

    https://www.journalsofaloveaddict.com/

    EP37: A Case of Cathexis

    EP37: A Case of Cathexis

    In love addiction we often feel like we're in love, but is it really love? And what is genuine love, anyway?

    In this episode, Jodi discusses the concept of cathexis--the thing we often confuse with genuine love--and the role it played in her love addiction. She also shares a recent painful experience that forced her to slow down in order to examine (and accept) reality, and to embrace the grief that came with all of it. 
     
    Music by JD Pendley

    EP36: You Are Not Stuck with Becky Vollmer

    EP36: You Are Not Stuck with Becky Vollmer

    Do you ever feel like what you're doing in the world isn't aligned with who you are? Like maybe you're going through the motions of 'supposed to' instead of living from your true purpose? If so, you're not alone...

    In this episode Jodi talks with Becky Vollmer about her new book, "You Are Not Stuck: How Soul-Guided Choices Transform Fear Into Freedom" which provides relatable steps for getting back to authenticity. They also discuss their similar experiences with first careers; the importance of knowing what we do and don't value; and how yoga can help us tap into our True Self.

    Music by JD Pendley

     

    EP35: When He's Married To Mom with Dr. Kenneth Adams

    EP35: When He's Married To Mom with Dr. Kenneth Adams

    When we're enmeshed with a parent we might feel responsible for taking care of them emotionally, and guilty if we don't do what they expect of us.

    And while enmeshment is often uncomfortable, it may also come with feeling special and can be very challenging to recognize and overcome.

    In this episode, Jodi talks with Dr. Kenneth Adams, therapist and author of "When He's Married to Mom", about mother-enmeshed men: What is childhood like for them? What are their adult relationships like? And how to recover from enmeshment and have functional adult relationships (with both partners and parents).

    Music by JD Pendley