Episode 17: Don’t panic, but there’s PCP in the clam chowder!

Welcome to the burning lava hot hellscape of your dreams! No, it’s not hell folks, it’s pronounced summer, or summah if you’re Ben Affleck, which you are. Sink your teeth into an heirloom tomato, and then get horny as we tell you all about your 25th favorite emoji according to science, the sexy little eggplant! So slick yourself up with baby oil and do some grillin' and chillin', it’s Life’s a Banquet the tomatocast! 

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Mama Mia babes, it’s a time for an extra saucy Ep of America's number one selling podcast! Join Nicole & Z as they tell the tales of Italy’s finest, Chef Boyardee, and the sexy history of Puttanesca! So kiss your fingers and don’t let that god damn meatball roll away from you, it’s Life’s a Banquet the pastacast! 

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It’s time to get wet and wild with part 2 of our waterworld saga! Z has the harrowing tale of José Salvador Alvarenga and his unbelievable survival story after being lost at sea for 438 days. So grab your swimmies and jump on in to Life’s a Banquet the podcast!

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Ahoy, mateys, and argh to you all! This week Nic and Z are deep diving into the great blue abyss. Nicole regales us with the tale of tuna, and spoiler alert, it’s dolphin! So call Kevin Costner and tell him we’re gonna need a bigger boat, it’s Life’s a Banquet the seacast!

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Ahoy babes! Gather round and grab a fist-full of buttery pound cake, and open your little ear holes as two middle aged women tell you all about Ben Affleck's back tattoo and the riveting history of baking powder! Guess what? It’s made from ground up forks and knives! So grab yourself a dry scone and be careful not to choke on it, it’s Life’s a Banquet the podcast!

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Ahoy mouse community, this Buds for you! This week Nic & Z are talking fromage! Oui, it’s true! Nic gets hysterical about Mac & Cheese, while Zahra taps into the wires of the Associated Press to bring you everything you need to know about Cheese and crime! So bake your self up a Brie and melt into this unhinged Ep, it’s Life’s a Banquet the podcast!

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It’s only 350 days until Valentine’s Day...

And that’s why we are getting an early jump with our VD lovestravaganza! Buckle up, buttercups, for the gory story of the Valentine's Day massacre, and the worst possible foods to eat on a date if you want to get laid without soiling the bed. So crack into that box of Russel Stovers and pick out all the shwaggy ones filled with fruit cream, it’s Life’s a Banquet the lovecast!

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Hello tiny baby piglets, and welcome to a frightening episode about Americas third favorite meat, Pig meat! Join Nicole & Z as they take on Big Pork one falling-off-the-bone rib after another, in this hard hitting exposé! PIGS! They’re awfully cute, but they will eat you if you don’t eat them first! So dust off that Shake & Bake and queue up Pig in the City, it’s Life’s a Banquet the podcast!!

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Strech it, toss it, and cover it in outrageous conspiracy theories. That’s right folks, it’s everyones favorite food, especially if you’re a turtle….PIZZA! Join us for the brutal history of the “Pizza Wars”, and the adorable ping pong themed restaurant at the center of The Clinton’s all child buffet! So grab a slice and log on to the dark web, it’s Life’s a Banquet the mother fucking podcast!!

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Move over Charlie Sheen, there’s a new bad boy in town, and his name is Bobby Flay! Folks, it’s time for a trip down memory lane, and the path is slathered in Mango Salsa! Join us for two hilarious NYT reviews of Union Square Cafe and Mesa Grill, and save room for the Blue Corn Crusted everything! 

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