Episode 24: Thir13en Ghosts

In an episode that goes on almost as long as the movie, we explore Guillermo Del Toro's Disney fanfic where Alice and Loke are pursued through the Haunted Mansion ride by the lady who turned down the role of Wasp in Ant-Man for being too love-interest-y. Beware of Crimson Peak!

We're BACK and bringing you 1995's "Mortal Kombat," a film Roger Ebert said he "wouldn't go so far as to recommend." Join us as we dissect the film's many subtle themes, such as kicking, and, like, punching.

We cover what may very well be THE LOUDEST MOVIE UNTIL MICHAEL BAY'S TRANSFORMERS FRANCHISE CAME ALONG, a cheesy remake of a cheesy 60s cheesefest: Thir13en Ghosts, in which a math professor fails to notice that his teenage daughter is actually almost 30. I guess the title isn't the only thing that fails at math...

Now let us never speak of Fast & Furious Presents: Hobbs & Shaw ever again.

Stanley Kubrick's 1980 classic "The Shining" marks the second film we've watched that was probably at least partially made as an excuse for the filmmakers to dick around in a cool hotel for a couple of weeks. Amy complains a fair bit about the odd screeching violin noise the movie keeps making.

Amy has us revisit a childhood classic for many an 80s youth: The NeverEnding Story. Yes, that's how it's written, with the capital E in the middle. Shut up. Let's take a trip down memory lane and see if we can't figure out why online therapy is so popular amongst the xennials. 

Our first foray into foreign films (say that six times fast) mostly involves Amy sighing in frustration as she is subjected to an animated 70s sci-fi film that is presumably a complex allegory about power dynamics but is like 85% tits and sex.

We start 2021 off with the movie it deserves, one about idiots failing history and a world in desperate need of a time machine. Thankfully, the lovable Bill and Ted are here to make it not as terrible, since they're cute, so there's that. Amy pronounces German castle names for us!

We discuss the OG - Bram Stoker's Dracula. Francis Ford Coppola made the ultimate 90s "sexy" version of the tale, where everyone is breathing heavily, sniffing each other, and absolutely thirsty AF. Join us for the film that only needed a bunch of glitter and long awkward pauses in the conversation to morph into "Twilight."

In this episode we learn that Amy’s definition of “horror movie” is “anything that has bugs in it,” as she chooses the 1999 decidedly NON-horror re-make of “The Mummy” for her scary movie. If you look real hard, you might see a smear of blood on Brendan Fraser’s shirt, so maybe something scary happened off-screen.

Here is the link to the MN Toy Posse webcast we were on: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O4D-rzvoGyw

You should check them out!