Episode 9: Planet of the Apes

In which we come to terms with Ron Ormond's anti-communist, red scare religious propoganda film IF FOOTMEN TIRE YOU, WHAT WILL HORSES DO? (1971). Wow. Just wow. People believe this stuff?

In which we discuss our enjoyment of Claudia Weill's truly independent film GIRLFRIENDS (1978) but somehow veer into discussing White Chicks (2004). (Contains spoilers.)

In which we conduct a thorough investigation of Dan's love language.

In which we eviscerate LOVE ACTUALLY (2003), Richart Curtis's much-loved and unforgivable romantic comedy.

In which Dan and Ron watch several episodes of The Simpsons—Marge vs. the Monorail, Last Exit to Springfield, and A Milhouse Divided—and in the end Ron falls asleep. (Warning: spoilers.)

In which Dan and Ron get their bumbling superhero needs fulfilled by Kinka Usher's MYSTERY MEN (1999), a comic book adaptation that's not from Marvel or DC. Based on Bob Burden's indie series, and featuring Ben Stiller, William H. Macy, Janeane Garofalo, and Geoffrey Rush. (Contains spoilers.)

In which Dan and Ron suffer through RABBIT TEST (1978), the first and only film directed by Joan Rivers, so that you don't have to watch a pregnant Billy Crystal encounter a slew of comedy stars of the 70s. (Contains many intentional spoilers.)

In which Matt, Dan, and Ron sit by a loud fountain in Saratoga Springs and talk about NOPE (2022), BEAST (2022), EVIL TOONS (1992), FAKE-OUT (1982), SMALL TOWN ECSTASY (2022), and THE REHEARSAL (2022). Warning: All sorts of spoilers.

In which Matt, Dan, and Ron finish out two days at the Mahoning Drive-In by watching the electrifying MAN-MADE MONSTER (1941) and the third Black Lagoon movie, THE CREATURE WALKS AMONG US (1942).

In which Matt, Dan, and Ron start off their second night at the Mahoning Drive-In with Boris Karloff as THE MUMMY (1932) and the Invisible Man's grandson in INVISIBLE AGENT (1942).