Episode Fifty Three - 30 Second Reviews, Bacon as a Plant, Expensive Whiskey, Fake Ferraris & F1 Memorabilia

Rob & Jonny return from their monumental summer road trip to the Czech Republic to tell Ben everything that he missed. Along with the Porsche Panamera, a wide range of topics are covered, including Czech cuisine, varying levels of European football stadia, and childcare.

After a short hiatus, Smooth Traffic returns to preview the 2019 Summer Road Trip! Three years since taking a Caterham from Land's End to John O'Groats, Rob & Jonny finally feel ready to embark on another road trip, and have decided to treat themselves. Once again though, Ben misses out, though for an altogether more important reason...

It's that time of year again, as Jonny and Rob huddle around the microphone to discuss the upcoming Formula One season... and Ben's here this time too! As Rob and Jonny discuss who they think should and shouldn't be on the grid, as well as making some absurdly bold predictions, Ben takes us through which teams have the best colour schemes for the new season, before choosing a team to support. If he was actually going to watch the F1. Based purely on their livery.

The chaps return for 2019 and, once again, Jonny brings his own unique style to the 30 second reviews, while Rob starts the year by repeating himself about driving etiquette in snowy conditions. The Champions League of crisps gets underway and there are a few upsets in the first knockout round. Ben hosts another 'higher or lower' quiz, this time covering classic cars, and there's some contention about the winner. The chaps also receive a fax about a tweet (because it's 2019 after all) and discuss what accessories would be provided if there were Smooth Traffic action figures.

It's Christmas, and the chaps have gotten together to produce a vaguely-themed episode! Rob offers Jonny an early Christmas present to celebrate his new life as an office worker, but Ben slams the brakes on before things get out of hand. Jonny compares the Ford Ranger to Ray Mears and talks about the Transit EV concept. Ben and Rob try to repair the damage from the last episode by giving Jonny some car-based art to review, and also review the mince pies that they've tried so far this year. There's a culture quiz just for Ben, so that Rob and Jonny can figure out exactly how much help he needs, and the chaps discuss the exorbitant prices of men's clothing.

Jonny provides yet more concise and informative reviews via the 30 second review format, before announcing a Champions League-style tournament to discover the best crisps. Ben asks Jonny to review some art produced by a rather unexpected source, with inevitable results, while Rob and Jonny have an insightful discussion about cyclists and bad drivers. There's also time for a roundup of tech news from F1, Audi, Samsung, science and the toilet industry.

Despite Jonny's best efforts to technologically sabotage himself, this episode almost goes off without a hitch. The chaps receive a fax from no less than a deity, which raises the question: what plant should bacon be? Jonny has driven a lot of cars recently, and provides his own unique insight on these via our classic 30 second reviews format. There are some rants thanks to expensive whiskey and chopped-up Ferraris appearing on Twitter, and Ben also puts together a pretty decent quiz on F1 memorabilia.

For the first time in a while, the Smooth Traffic guys have all ended up in the same room together. The chaps discuss the Bracknell Bees ice hockey team, following a trip to watch them play the Invicta Dynamos, as well as providing 30-second reviews of all the cars that they drove at the recent SMMT regional test days. Jonny asks why USB cables are so expensive, and why they break so often, leading Rob and Ben to question Jonny's life choices. The chaps try to figure out who wins the eternal struggle for dominance between FIFA and Pro Evolution Soccer for the current season, and Jonny reveals Bitter cars to the world, much to everyone's dismay. There's also a lot of drinking, followed by tasting notes from the world's newest experts!

Smooth Traffic has (finally) made it to 50 episodes, and the chaps celebrate in style(ish). Jonny reviews two Jaguars, the XE and XF, as well as the Alfa Romeo Giulia. There's a world exclusive Alfa Romeo Stelvio passenger ride, as well as thoughts on the recent gameplay trailer release for Red Dead Redemption 2. Jonny reviews more art, there's an exciting round of Deadliest Boot Spaces, and the usual level of disjointed discussion.