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    Guest: Joe Marler (part 2)

    enJuly 01, 2022

    Podcast Summary

    • Rugby legend Joe Mahler shares insights on playing rugbyBorn in 1990, Mahler focuses on being decent under high ball, avoiding smaller wingers, staying in middle of field, and facing intimidating opponents. Despite injuries, he desires to play cricket.

      Learning from this."podcast is that rugby legend, Joe Mahler, shared his experiences and insights about playing rugby, specifically focusing on his vascular physique, the challenges of facing larger opponents, and the importance of staying in the middle of the field. Mahler discussed how he was born in 1990, which led to a humorous conversation about semen. He shared that his primary job is to be decent under the high ball and avoid getting battered by smaller wingers. Mahler also talked about facing intimidating opponents like Sebastian Chabale and shared a story about being run over by a winger during the World Cup final. He emphasized the importance of staying in the middle of the field and avoiding unnecessary confrontations. Mahler also mentioned that he's had several injuries leading to multiple retirements, and joked about his nickname "helmet boy." Despite this, he expressed his desire to play cricket someday. Overall, Mahler's conversation provided an entertaining and insightful look into the mind of a rugby legend.

    • Reflecting on His Career: Gratitude and Ambivalence from David WalliamsBritish comedian and actor David Walliams expresses gratitude for his experiences, particularly rugby under 21 and TV shows, while acknowledging his past ambivalence towards rugby's pressure and financial benefits.

      David Walliams, a well-known British comedian and actor, reflects on his career and expresses gratitude for his experiences, particularly those related to his time playing rugby under 21 and performing on popular TV shows like "8 out of 10 Cats" and "Afterlife." He shares that he once took his opportunities for granted but now savors every moment. Walliams also discusses his ambivalence towards his rugby career, expressing that he didn't enjoy the constant pressure and focus required, but now appreciates the financial benefits. He jokes about making the game less enjoyable for others and admires figures like Sonny Adams, who brought others down to his level. Overall, Walliams' conversation highlights the importance of appreciating experiences and the value of hard work and determination.

    • The rough and painful experiences in rugbyPlayers endure intense physical contact and injuries for the camaraderie and unique experiences in rugby

      Rugby can be a rough and painful experience for players, with incidents like ear biting and being choked out happening on and off the field. Despite the discomfort and injuries, the camaraderie and unique experiences keep the players engaged and committed to the game. The scrum, a crucial part of rugby, involves intense physical contact and can lead to various injuries such as bulging discs and pins and needles. However, the excitement and adrenaline rush make it a worthwhile experience for the players. The conversation between the players also reveals their sense of humor and light-hearted approach towards their experiences, even in the face of pain and discomfort.

    • The Value of Fan Support for AthletesFan support creates essential buzz and atmosphere for athletes, enhancing their enjoyment and performance. Absence of fans can negatively affect morale and motivation, particularly for younger players.

      The excitement and energy from playing in front of a live audience is a significant motivation for athletes, even if they have previously downplayed the importance of fan support for financial reasons. The speaker in this conversation shared his personal experience of realizing the value of the fans during the pandemic when rugby matches were played in empty stadiums. He acknowledged that the buzz and atmosphere created by the fans are essential for his enjoyment and performance on the field. The speaker also mentioned how the absence of fans affected the motivation of younger players, creating a sense of disinterest and hopelessness within the team. Overall, this conversation highlights the importance of fan support in professional sports and the impact it has on the morale and motivation of athletes.

    • An unexpected intersection of snooker and DJingPeople can have hidden talents and multifaceted identities, encouraging us to approach them with an open mind and embrace the unexpected.

      Steve Davis, a renowned snooker player and DJ, defied expectations during a chance encounter at a literary festival. Instead of the anticipated after-dinner speaking engagement, Davis was found casually drinking a cider behind the tent. When discovered, he revealed his side gig as a techno DJ, surprising the speaker. This unexpected intersection of snooker and DJing showcases how individuals can have hidden talents and multifaceted identities. The encounter serves as a reminder to approach people with an open mind and to be willing to embrace the unexpected.

    • Joe shares childhood stories from HeathfieldJoe recalls burning down a slide and interacts with older kids, expressing excitement about podcast appearance

      The speaker, Joe, shared stories from his childhood in Heathfield, including an incident where they burned down a playground slide at Downsview Avenue around 2004. He also mentioned his interaction with some older kids and how they reacted to his success as an England player. The conversation also touched upon the topic of famous people living in Heathfield, such as Robert Smith from The Cure. The speaker expressed his excitement about coming on the podcast and how it might change his perception in the eyes of others. The conversation was filled with nostalgic anecdotes and light-hearted banter.

    • Joe's Love for Teamwork and SelflessnessJoe values teamwork over personal glory, often playing defensive roles in sports to prioritize the team's success.

      Joe values teamwork and selflessness over personal glory. He shares a fondness for sports, particularly football and cricket, and has a history of playing these games in various teams. Despite his apparent skills, Joe has often chosen to play defensive roles, such as a destroyer or an artist at the back. This decision, driven by his focus on the team, has earned him admiration from others. Currently, Joe is preoccupied with building a mud kitchen for his kids and is looking to buy plywood instead of MDF for the project. He also has a connection to Heathfield, having played golf for a village nearby. When asked about his future plans, Joe expresses his difficulty in making long-term commitments. Instead, he focuses on the present and the tasks at hand. Throughout the conversation, Joe's selflessness and dedication to his team shine through, making him an inspiring figure.

    • Speakers recall details amidst distractionsThrough humor and adaptability, speakers managed to stay focused and plan a meeting despite interruptions and chaos.

      Despite the chaos and distractions, the speakers managed to recall important details about a location and plan to meet up. The conversation was filled with interruptions, humor, and random occurrences, but they remained focused on the task at hand. The speakers mentioned a fire station opposite a co-op, a house where a slide had burned down, and a mud kitchen that needed help. They also made plans to meet up at a place that was in "spitting distance" from where one of them currently was. Despite the disjointed nature of the conversation, they were able to piece together the necessary information to make their plans. Additionally, they expressed their love for Monty Python and made plans to jam together, showcasing their shared interests and sense of humor. Overall, the conversation demonstrated the importance of staying focused and adaptable in the face of distractions and interruptions.

    • Friends reminiscing about their past and sharing storiesThey discussed their youth, joked, and appreciated their friendship, reflecting on the significance of shared experiences.

      The conversation between the two friends revolved around their shared past experiences, particularly their connection to the places Heathfield and New Haven. They reminisced about their youth, joked around, and discussed their current lives. The friend, Joe, mentioned his musical past and shared a story about a guitar he once owned. They also talked about their podcast and the possibility of promoting each other's work. Despite some technical difficulties, they expressed their appreciation for each other and their friendship. Overall, the conversation was a reminder of the importance of friendship and the shared experiences that bring people together.

    • A heartwarming discussion about Heathfield and Doctor WhoSpeakers shared fond memories and the importance of research for inclusion in a collaborative podcast episode.

      Despite busy schedules, the speakers were eager to collaborate on a podcast episode about Heathfield, a market town in East Sussex, England. They discussed the importance of research for inclusion and enjoyed reminiscing about their shared connection to the town, which brought up fond memories of Tom Baker and Doctor Who. The conversation was filled with humor and a shared appreciation for the Chatterbix podcast, even the less than perfect episodes. Despite technical difficulties and interruptions, they expressed their enjoyment of the conversation and their excitement to continue the collaboration.

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    114: Learn How to Age Well in 2021

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    Hello everyone and welcome to episode 114, “Learn how to Age Well in 2021.”

    Before we get started

    Several weeks ago a family friend stopped over to our house, and on her way out the door, she said, “Oh, by the way, I listened to your podcast this morning [episode 109, Rekindle Relationships by Remembering]. It made me feel guilty about a friend of mine who lost her husband a year ago. So I called her to set up a time to get together. Thank you.”

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    On to today's program

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    “People become old far too fast”

    Keep listening to hear what we can do to keep from becoming old far too fast.

    People become old far too fast

    To put this six-word paragraph into its context, I’ll read a brief section from Hardy’s book:

    “As a person ages, they tend to stop engaging in new situations, experiences, and environments. In other words, people’s personalities become increasingly consistent because they stop putting themselves in new contexts. p. 200.

    “By the time a person reaches their thirties, they stop having as many ‘first experiences,’ as an example, first time driving, first job, first big failure, etc.

    “As people age, they become increasingly less open to having new experiences. They stop surrounding themselves with new types of people. They stop engaging in new roles and in new environments. New challenges aren't taken on anymore. They stop experiencing new emotions.

    "People become old far too fast.”

    Don’t avoid the “new”

    The operative word in his comments is “new.” The author writes how people who become old far too fast avoid “new.” By my count he uses the word “new” eight times in the section I just read.

    I don’t know about you, but I wonder if this is true for me, too. Do I avoid “new”?

    Because truth be told, I’m a fan of “old.” Old ways of doing things. Familiar foods, familiar clothes, familiar people. Old ways of dealing with life that I think have served me well.

    But maybe I’m missing something. How about you? Maybe we all need a little more “new” in our lives to age well.

    Hmm. If you’re with me on this, I’d like to suggest we focus on just one new thing to keep us from becoming old far too fast.

    It’s this: learn one new skill. And that skill would be INVESTING. Yes, investing. Not investing money, but investing in ourselves, and investing in others

    Investing in ourselves
    • In my twenties, during my high school teaching days, I would spend an hour a week on my future. Started with anticipating my future as a teacher.  MS in counseling that led to something totally away from my intended goal
    • Benjamin Hardy, the author of Personality isn’t Permanent would call it investing in my “future self.” The person I want to be
    • We can invest in ourselves by reading
    • Be open to new relationships to age well in 2021
    • Learning new relationship skills, such as listening. How to ask questions. How to fight the urge to fill the airwaves with the sound of our voice
    • Make room for God in ways you haven't before. Make room for him
    • We can invest in ourselves by studying the Bible to learn how to be more kind, compassionate, and patient with one another
    • Another way we can invest in ourselves is to acknowledge our fears and practice trusting people more. And God more, too.
    • Listen to episodes 11-14 about the four levels of relationship skill. I’ll have a link to them in the show notes.
    Investing in others
    • When you invest money, you expect a return on your investment. You expect to get something back. It’s not always that way with relationships
    • Invest in people without any exception of a return on your investment
    • Quote from basketball coaching legend, John Wooden, who said, “You haven't had a perfect day until you've done something for someone who can never repay you.”
    • Being with kids keeps you from aging too fast
    • Teachers and others who work with kids have a great opportunity to invest in others
    • Mr. Littaritz’s funeral, June 19, 2021. Most of his 87 years on earth were spent investing in others, namely teenagers
    So what does all this mean for YOU?

    How can you use what you’ve heard today to improve the relationships in YOUR life? Here are a few ideas:

    • Invest in others. Example: Mr. Littaritz. He prepared his students for the draft, running his P.E. class like boot camp. The marching, the barking at students. And at times with a smirk afterward
    • Invest in yourself to age well. Devout an hour a week for your future like I did in my 20s
    • Colossians 3:10 “Put on your new nature, and be renewed as you learn to know your Creator and become like him.”
    • Learning to know your creator and becoming like him is a great way to invest in yourself.
    Here’s the main point I hope you remember from today’s episode

    We can age well by investing in our self and in others. It keeps our focus more on the new and less on the old. And it prevents us from aging faster than we should.

    I’d love to hear any thoughts you have about today’s episode. Just send them to me in an email to john [at] caringforothers [dot] org. Or you can share your thoughts in the “Leave a Reply” box at the bottom of the show notes.

    Closing

    In closing, if you found this podcast helpful, please subscribe if you haven’t already done so. Feel free to forward this episode to others you think might be interested in today’s content.

    I hope your thinking was stimulated by today’s show, to both reflect and to act. So that you will find the joy God intends for you through your relationships. Because after all, You Were Made for This.

    Well, that’s all for today. I look forward to connecting with you again next week. Goodbye for now.

    Related resources you may want to check out

    Dr. Benjamin Hardy’s book, Personality Isn’t permanent

    Prior episodes:

    113 Our Choices Define Us, Not Our Personality.

    105 How to Listen Better

    044: Thankful for the People Who Invested in Us

    011 Relationship Skills - Level 1

    012 Relationship Skills - Level 2

    013 Relationship Skills - Level 3

    014 Relationship Skills - Level 4

    You Were Made for This is sponsored by Caring for Others, a missionary care ministry. We depend upon the generosity of donors to pay our bills.  If you'd like to support what we do with a secure tax-deductible donation, please click here. We'd be so grateful if you did.

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