My Story: 19 & Pregnant

As much as we all love the holidays, it can be an intense time if you are an expectant or single mom. I know for me those first few years as a single parent were really challenging at times.

In today’s episode, I’m going to share some of my story maneuvering the Holiday season as a single parent, and then I’ll share some lessons I’ve learned along the way.

Now, if you’re thinking, “I’m not a single/expectant parent, so this doesn’t apply to me,” stick with me, because we all know people in our communities walking out this unique parenthood journey, and we can all learn to love and welcome them better in this season!

So, stay tuned for some great advice on how to embrace help and community in this new season. And if anything, know that I’ve been there and have had my fair share of awkward family encounters.

Here’s the breakdown of some important points from today’s episode…

• [0:50] My story of being 6-months pregnant & not having a wedding ring in a traditional hispanic family. My siblings were really supportive and protected me in tough conversations.
• [1:35] The early years were challenging. But one year, my work adopted us for Christmas and gave us tons of gifts. It was hard to accept help, but so good to embrace community.
• [2:40] Later on, I joined a single mom community. Being single through the holidays can be challenging, but it can be beautiful if you allow others into that space.
• [3:15] This experience changed the way my family does the holidays. We strive to open up our home to welcome anyone and everyone.
• [3:35] Maybe you’re facing an unexpected pregnancy and haven’t told anyone yet. I know how tough that can be in so close proximity to family and friends. Just know, you are not alone. 
• [3:55] I don’t want to make light of the challenges you’re facing, but this will pass. We’re heading into a new year, and things can look much different from how they do now.

This is a community, and you belong here. As always, feel free to connect with me at elisa@shemight.com if you have any questions or maybe you just need a listening ear.

So, no matter where you find yourself, I hope you have a wonderful Holiday season!

When I found out I was pregnant, I knew I would have to tell some people. But if I'm honest, I was not prepared for some of the responses I would receive from those closest to me.

Today’s episode is about preparing you for some of those challenging conversations. Whether you’re breaking the news or on the receiving end of it, my hope is that you will walk away from our time together prepared to navigate people’s responses well. 

In this episode, I'll walk you through some negative responses you might hear and help you learn how to process them. Then, I’ll share some empowering responses that I hope you’ll hear—but if not, you’ll hear them from me.

Here are some of the highlights:

• [0:55] My story. At 19, I was not prepared for some of the responses I received. 
• [1:33] People are reactive. We’re so quick to give a response. Here are some negative responses you might here.
• [1:55] “Wow, you’re really young.” That’s just not helpful.
• [2:39] “How are you going to______?” Education, job, future, etc. Again, not empowering.
• [3:30] “I’m so sorry.” The most common response. When I told my career-driven sister about my pregnancy, she said this to me. 
• [4:27] “Are you guys even in a serious relationship?” Maybe you haven’t been dating very long. 
• [5:11] You only get one chance to respond to this news. Here are some positive responses I hope you hear from those who love you.
• [5:24] “I love you.” Sometimes, what we need is not even a response, just someone to sit with you in this.
• [5:50] “You are not alone.” My favorite response I wish people used more!
• [6:01] “What do you need? How can I help?” This gives you permission to tell them how they can empower you in the moment.
• [6:30] But if you don’t have a community of your support, I want to be part of your community. You can do whatever you set your mind to. 

This is a community, and you belong here. So, reach out to me directly at elisa@shemight.com if you have any questions, or maybe you just need a listening ear.

Until next time, friends!

When I was 19 and pregnant, I was working as a waitress at a restaurant. I certainly did not have a lot of disposable income. But I learned some hard lessons about what babies actually need and the best ways to get those items.

Today, I’ll be sharing my tips and tricks for budgeting for a newborn. From throwing a baby shower to borrowing items from a friend to thrifting at your local second-hand stores, having a baby does not have to break the bank!

Because at the end of the day, your baby needs love, not stuff.

*For those of you listening on my podcast, hop over to my YouTube Channel to join my son, his girlfriend, and me on a fun shopping trip to Target! Click here to join the fun!  

Here are the highlights of this episode:

• [00:36] What does a baby actually need? How do I get that in an affordable way?
• [01:02] Throw a baby shower! Friends and family want to buy things for your baby. Ask for gift cards and diapers, throw a raffle to make it fun, then shop for the items you really need.
• [02:25] Ask your community what items they actually find necessary. Ask to borrow items or purchase items for a fraction of the cost.
• [03:45] Go thrifting! Get ideas at boutiques/high-end stores, then purchase items online or at a thrift store.
• [04:21] Babies need love, not things. Don’t overthink it. Think about spending on something for yourself, like a massage or books to read, to make you feel better.
• [05:30] So glad you’re part of the She Might community. Reach out with any questions or ideas!
• [06:03] Trip to Target! Click here to join the fun & meet by son and his girlfriend:

I hope this week encourages you! Next time I see you, my grandson will be with us! <3

As always, I’d love to hear from you. Reach out to me directly at elisa@shemight.com or join me weekly at my kitchen table on my YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCbZGOsLFKXyYU7yi3myzAUQ/

Creating your birth plan and putting together a hospital checklist are important steps to preparing yourself for labor and delivery. But with the breadth of information online and ever-growing opinions of our family and friends, it can be hard to stay true to ourselves in the process.

Today, I’ll be sharing some advice on how to approach your birth plan in a way that empowers you in your unique situation and personality.

There is no one size fits all here, so just know yourself and do what makes you feel most comfortable.

Here’s that hospital checklist:

• Hospital Paperwork, ID, and Insurance Card
• Socks/Slippers - it gets cold in the hospital!
• Bathrobe - to cover where the hospital gown doesn’t
• Music Playlist/Relaxing entertainment - books, playlists, and music that relaxes you
• Toiletries & Cosmetics - to feel fresh and comfortable
• Essential Oils - to calm and ease you if it helps you
• Glasses/contact lenses - if you need them
• Change of clothes - choose something loose fitting and comfortable
• Cell Phone Charger - so you can take all the pictures you want of your new baby
• Baby outfits, socks, and booties - to dress the little one and keep baby warm
• Diaper bag - yes, all the diapers
• Car seat -  to take baby home safely

Happy packing and planning, friends! I hope you enjoyed this week with me!

Here’s where you’ll find some of the highlights of the episode:

• [00:33] Inspiration behind this episode. My son and his girlfriend are preparing for the arrival of their baby, sparked conversations about labor and delivery. My grandson is coming soon!
• [01:05] What to do when it comes to a birth plan. Know who you are, consider your unique personality and situation, there is no one size fits all.
• [01:52] My own birth plan with my first child. I was a total hippy who wanted an all natural birth, but plans changed, so also be prepared to be a little flexible.
• [02:28] What to bring to the hospital. Socks, bathrobe, music playlist, toiletries, makeup, cell phone charger, essential oils, baby outfits, diaper bag, car seat. But hospital has items in case you forget!
• [04:29] Most importantly, bring your voice. You decide what you want and how you want it. Do what works for you.
• [05:00] Don’t forget—my son and his girlfriend are going to work through their real life birth story. Stay tuned for that!

I’d love to hear from you! Contact me directly at elisa@vftv.org or join me weekly at my kitchen table on my YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCbZGOsLFKXyYU7yi3myzAUQ/

I am going to be a grandma! Yes, you read that right. In March of this year my 19-year-old son told me that he and his girlfriend were pregnant. 

“They're too young, not married, not ready, and what on earth will people think???” Strong emotions overwhelmed me, but somehow, I walked around the counter and pulled him into a hug.

So here we are, 9 months into this journey with my son and his girlfriend, and we will meet my grandson this week!!!

On today’s episode, I share about our unexpected journey (x2), the moment he broke the news, and how I’m walking through this now as a parent.

Here are some of the highlights:

• [00:15] Pregnancy announcement. My son and his girlfriend are pregnant.
• [01:05] How Tyler broke the news. Happened during an argument, how I felt at first, pulling him into a hug, what I told him.
• [02:19] The first person his girlfriend told. Friend offered to pay for her abortion, all the voices she wrestled with, what his girlfriend actually wanted to hear.
• [03:19] My feelings as his mom. Fear and concern, but also hope.
• [03:33] Advice for the child considering telling a parent. Write a few notes, pick a good time to tell them, some ways to think about their response.
• [04:30] Welcome. We're not meant to do life alone. Subscribe & stay in touch.

That was on my heart to share this week. See you next time!

Reach out to me directly at elisa@vftv.org or join me weekly at my kitchen table on my YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCbZGOsLFKXyYU7yi3myzAUQ/

Finding out you’re pregnant is not always good news. When I saw those two lines on the pregnancy test, I felt like time stood still. I had my whole life ahead of me. I couldn’t believe I had let this happen.

For this week’s episode, I’ll be sharing my personal story of being 19 and pregnant, and I’ll be getting deep here because I believe in the power of transparency.

But beyond being vulnerable, I hope that my story lets you in on something important. There are not a lot of places where we can have conversations about unexpected pregnancy. So consider this a safe place for us to have those conversations on everything from relationships, jobs, crazy parents, all of it!

Here's where you'll find some of the highlights:

• [01:07] A little backstory. My childhood, my mom passing away, hanging with the wrong crowd, using hard-core drugs, so a lot of trauma. 
• [02:31] Moving to Massachusetts. Bought my first snow scraper, made some not-so-great friends, got into a relationship.
• [02:54] Finding out I was pregnant. All the emotions and thoughts, going to an abortion clinic.
• [04:00] Telling my dad. Our relationship was in a rough spot. This is the phone call I had with him, his response, and what I decided to do.
• [06:20] To the single moms, birth moms, maybe you've had an abortion, you are not alone. 
• [06:35] Why am I dong this? There's power in vulnerability and community. This is a safe place to talk about it all. A preview of topics to come. 

I hope my story encourages you this week!

Reach out to me directly at elisa@vftv.org or join me weekly at my kitchen table on my YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCbZGOsLFKXyYU7yi3myzAUQ/