Nostalgia for the Future & Nothing to Lose

Where do we draw the line in terms of who's responsible for protection? Do we expect the government to protect us from everything? 

Life is risky, and to an extent, each person is responsible for the risks they choose to subject themselves to. This brings up the question that at what point is the government overstepping or overreaching their authority in the name of “protecting the public.”

In today's episode, Virginia and I talk through the concerns I have with the status of the stock market, interest rates, inflation, and general economic climate of the US right now. It’s all accumulating to a point that’s making me feel very on edge. 

I have strong concerns about the stimulus payments that were sent to Americans because, as we express, some of us didn’t necessarily need the money and we feel it could have been applied differently to really help those who actually needed it. It all comes down to access, education, and the privilege to have those things.

Now, we’re collectively facing the repercussions of rates being too low for too long in combination with the infusion of trillions of dollars as stimulus - recession. 

The public will always spend money, although we may see a shift in purchasing trends. However, when seemingly excessive restrictions and regulations result in the suppression of free market will, we have a problem.

In this episode, listen for:

• My frustration around when good companies get destroyed by government overreach
• Looking back at the mid-pandemic market peaks
• “Is there ever a point where we hit zero?”

I’m constantly trying to find the balance between remaining informed and being oblivious. For now, it seems that watching the news is making me feel frazzled which is a signal that I do need to step away and get a fresh perspective. Thank goodness for the beach!

www.unlearningproject.org

“Why does it have to be that so much of your energetic years are committed to earning income or saving or working? ”

Society has ingrained in us that we have to work 50 weeks out of the year and only get two weeks off, but when you really think about it, that puts you on a path toward spending all your valuable time working, saving, and hustling instead of enjoying your life. 

In today’s episode, Virginia and I talk about Bill Perkins’s book, Die with Zero. In summary, Bill’s book operates off the premise that we work like dogs during the best years of our lives to accumulate a great deal of money but then never really spend it. 

We live in a fear-based society where productivity, packed schedules, and accumulation of wealth are valued above all else. Well, guess what - they don’t put your net worth on your tombstone, so what’s all that worry on building a nest egg actually worth?

Even if we reach retirement age with a healthy nest egg, we may find that we lack the physical and mental stamina to enjoy our newfound freedom. So, it’s time we all focus on enjoying the prime years of our lives a little more so and worry less about accumulating a random number in our investment portfolio. 

In this episode, listen for:

• Money is a tool for creating joy and happiness in our lives and in the lives of others 
• Your mind thinks of life as limitless and our years are numbered. You won’t be as able and agile 10 years from now as you are today.
• Why it makes sense to front load your money and resources now

There is no need to let the prospect of making and spending money frighten us into a state of financial restraint. Time is of the utmost value. Make the most of the time you have and steer clear of the all work & no play mentality. When you make a purchase of something, reveal that purchase, enjoy it to the max, and show guilt the door. 

Is your wealth going to outlive you? If so, what can you do to create joy in the lives of those you love right now, making the best use of your money possible while you’re here to take part in the memories. 

www.unlearningproject.org

 Bill Perkins’s book, Die with Zero

 

There are seasons of life in which all your energy, time, and mental space is taken up by your circumstances. The thing is, you probably don’t even realize you were in a bubble until you come out of it. One major “bubble” of life is the 20 year period in which you have kids, are driving your career forward, and are likely caring for or at least keeping an eye on your aging parents. 

Prior to having kids, we had a social life, ambitions, and even hobbies. But inside the bubble, our priorities are different and our own desires often get shuffled to the side. Sometimes the bubble consumes you so completely that it’s tough to keep up with world events, pop culture, or anything that doesn’t relate directly to our immediate family’s needs and wants.   

Comedian Bill Burr provided the inspiration for this conversation with his skit about The Bubble. Today, Virginia and I discuss our different phases of being in the bubble.

The common rhetoric of practicing gratefulness directly conflicts with our natural desire to compare ourselves with others. Who has it worse? Does it depend on income, the number of kids, the grandparents’ ability to help, working parents vs stay at home parents? Everything’s a comparison. 

The truth is, comparison and seemingly selfish thoughts are your brain’s natural tendency toward survival mode. It’s natural to look toward others as a gauge - are you doing better or worse?  

Only your scenario is occupying your brain’s attention. It’s natural to think you’d handle a situation better than someone else. Our ability to understand what someone else is going through is limited by our own experience and true sympathy typically doesn’t surface until we experience something equally as tough. 

 

In this episode, listen for:

• It does not diminish the impact your condition is having on your life and mental health, even if someone else in the world is in a worse situation [13:38] 

 

• It's a natural instinct to keep moving forward and believe that things will get better to keep you from going down the rabbit hole of despair [27:32]

 

• You must be aware of where you are in your life's journey and of your personal ambitions [38:31] 

 

“The Bubble” concept becomes most apparent at the mid-life point. Once your kids are grown, it’s possible you find yourself looking back, wondering what happened to the original goals you set for yourself in your 20s. 

At this point, it’s useful to redefine what some call a mid-life crisis. Although some go about it the wrong way, mid-life is often a great time to reevaluate your lifestyle, goals, and ambitions. This is typically the point at which you’re exiting the bubble and finally have the mental space and energy to refocus on your desires in life. Are those things from your 20’s still important? It’s okay for goals to fade away, become irrelevant, or change. 

www.unlearningproject.org

Have you ever noticed a tendency to view yourself as invincible? It’s not a true belief of invincibility, but rather a perception that other people’s experiences couldn’t or wouldn’t ever happen to us. Virginia and I both admit to this when it comes to being sick.

It’s not typically something most people admit out loud or are even conscious of, but it’s the optimistic or perhaps naive assumption similarly phrased as “that won’t happen to me.”

For us, it’s often like a badge of honor that we never get sick. The perception digs in deeper as we often assume we’d react differently, navigate better, or problem-solve more quickly than someone else. 

This week I, Al Gugliotta, share about my Covid experience. Can you believe it? I wound up with Covid after two years of evading it! I still can’t believe it although I’ll have to come around soon since I’m still dealing with the chest congestion and all the after-effects.

Maybe this is one of those instinctual patterns like fight-or-flight that helps us keep moving forward during tough times or maybe it’s setting us up for disappointment. 

 In this episode, listen for:

• Having a greater sense of empathy and gratitude for the vaccine because of my exposure to COVID  [26:07] 
• We’re terrified of stillness and quiet. We’re conditioned to stay busy and if we stop, it’s uncomfortable [39:47] 
• Are you too close to your life and lifestyle which prevents you from taking action on your goals? [51:44] 

One thing I see clearly is the tendency for people (us included) to focus on a single issue that elicits an emotional response from them. We’re so focused on local issues that are blown out of proportion by the media when there are much more impactful issues going on in the world.

I’ve tried for so long to listen to all the news/podcasts to get both sides of the story and I’m starting to see that it’s not serving me, leading me toward a media fast altogether.

www.unlearningproject.org

You probably know someone who’s always showing off their latest purchase- maybe it’s gourmet lunch, a new car, the latest tech - you name it. When someone buys goods or services in an attempt to show their success, they are participating in conspicuous consumption.   

These days, everyone posts on social media doing “humble brags” about their life, and even if they don’t intend to showboat their status, that’s exactly what’s happening. Even something so seemingly innocent as vacation pics can be revealing of your status. 

 

No matter what you share, there’s always someone reading into it and wishing they had that money, time, experience, freedom, etc.  

 

The entire point of achieving Financial Independence is to have a steady cash flow, work less hours, and spend more time with your family. When consumption is purposeful and when each purchase is meaningful, you’ll automatically feel more fulfilled, no matter your financial status or achievements.  

 

In this episode, listen for 

• Instead of spending money on luxuries that may or may not last, foster connections with the humans you care most about.
• When purchasing a car, television, or other items, consider whether it’s a smart purchase over the long term, rather than participating in the latest flashy trends.
• You’ve seen ads portraying the “ideal” retirement lifestyle, but is that what you want your retirement to look like? 

 

Long-term investing helps attain the financial freedom you desire, but circumstances change. Are you so impressionable that huge corporations can say anything and you’ll believe it? 

 

Corporations suffer little-to-no consequences for false claims or poor products while the general public suffers as a direct result of decisions they made. Think about all the scams in just the past 10 years - Volkswagen, Purdue Pharma, HSBC, etc. This is the point at which trust is broken. Instead of being easily swayed, use your better judgment, do your research, and decide the truth for yourself.

www.unlearningproject.org

“You shouldn’t deny somebody their bottom.” In the end, hitting rock bottom may be the only thing that will save you.

In this episode, Virginia joins me as we discuss helping others and the possibility of helping too much. Imagine if someone came to you for help, how would you proceed? 

How do you find the balance between letting someone fend for themselves versus sharing the wealth?

Do handouts really help or do they ultimately prevent someone from experiencing the pain of hitting rock bottom and therefore denying them the fuel they may need to catapult toward success?

In this episode, listen for, 

 

• You will never forget your rock bottom [20:07] 

• While you are at your lowest point, you must solve problems day after day in order to climb out of your slump [46:17] 

• Reflect back on your lowest points and recognize that you have developed as a result of your experiences.[50:35]

If a person hasn’t yet struck rock bottom, they may lack the perseverance required to achieve their goals and set a higher bar for themselves in the future.

Consider the long-term results if you lend a hand. You’ll eventually have to let the person you’re trying to help get hit rock bottom in order for them to appreciate what they’ve been given.

www.unlearningproject.org

Jim Rohn said “Everyday stand guard at the door of your mind.” We are constantly bombarded with information. Our minds grow hazy as we begin to believe everything that comes our way. You must maintain vigilance while screening out irrelevant information.

Listen in as Timothy Messina joins me in a discussion about the harsh realities of the housing market crash and our contrarian views toward the corporations fueling the news content these days. Our discussion sums up the key points that stuck in our minds after watching the 2015 movie, “The Big Short” about the US subprime mortgage industry. 

Sadly, families lost their homes (and many lost their lives) due to the 2008/2009 market crash because high-risk mortgage loans were chopped up and packaged into securities that received high-quality ratings, causing them to, for a short period, attract investors and drive the stock market and the housing market upward. 

In this episode, listen for

• The definition of a true contrarian - do you think you could do it? 
• Better decisions can be made across the board with the right resources and solid research
• When something is popular, resist the temptation to follow the herd

Billions of dollars are being poured into giant firms every day.  This bolsters their business, making them seem like an authority.  Meanwhile, consumers place their complete trust in these corporations and their “advice” to the public. 

The oil industry and pharmaceutical companies, as just two examples, serve the public a healthy dose of what they want to hear while simultaneously covering up detrimental facts. The worst part? It’s been going on since we were kids and probably even before then. 

Rather than following the herd, consider going against it. Do your own research, stand up for what you believe in, and act in your own best interests.

www.unlearningproject.org

“Success is a balance between optimism and realism where it's unhindered by the weight of pessimism.” Which one are you? 

Is it ingrained in us to determine whether we are pessimists, optimists, or realists, and if so, do we continue to change in order to stay on track? Today, Virginia Elder joins me as we discuss how our minds operate, react, and what occurs when we’re confronted with uncontrollable circumstances.

In this episode, listen for:

• Examples of scenarios in which it is necessary to prioritize when problems occur- Optimists Reaslist Mindset (22:16)
• Optimistic realism enables us to experience the best until confronted with the worst (30:49) 
• Being a pessimist will keep you from attempting. (35:05) 

When circumstances are beyond our control, we have to quit reacting emotionally. At some point, there’s a need to evaluate and have a plan of action. We may think we’re stuck in an unpleasant situation, but it’s important to recognize that it will work out in the end. 

 

www.unlearningproject.org

When you come from nothing, it’s natural to push toward achievement. But what happens when you’ve achieved what you wanted? 

Does the bar move higher, do you fear losing it all, or can you sit back and enjoy the fruits of your labor?  Antonio Porretta joins me today to hash over the conversation we started having over coffee nearly 10 years ago. We’re able to look back, laugh and identify the key decisions that got us where we are.   

In this episode, listen for:

• Setting the guidelines for what's possible and what’s worth worrying about
• Walking the tightrope between striving for more versus benign grateful for what you have 
• Entrepreneurship can be lonely, so actively create ways to feel connected
• All the fear lies in anticipation of preconceived (false) notions in your head

At some point, we must consider what our ultimate goal is. “More” isn’t a goal. What is the point of scrimping and saving if you never stop and just enjoy what you have? Consider the sacrifice the generation before ours made so that we can have the privilege to look at life through our current lens. Maybe the goal should be just to give our kids a more advanced starting point than what we had.  

www.unlearningproject.org

We face risks daily in areas of money, health, kids, family, education, career, etc. Some risk has to do with the decisions we make while other risk lies in not making a move. In what areas of your life do you think you’re conjuring up risk that doesn’t really exist or that’s holding you back?

As with many things, our personal risk assessment begins with what we learned in childhood. In some ways, we want to continue what our parents did, but in other ways, we’ll have to make a conscious effort to unlearn the risks that they did or didn’t take. 

What proportion of our perceived risk is not real? 

How does exposure affect our perception of risk?

Do you tend to air on the side of caution or disregard risk?

How would you act if you knew that risk wasn’t real?

With heightened self-awareness, you could identify and cherry-pick risks you’re willing to take, identify biases, and alter areas in your life intentionally.