Relationships with Christina Tosi and Will Guidara

Podcast Summary

• Christina Tosi and Will Guadagrele's Unique Meeting and Collaboration: Industry connections can lead to unexpected collaborations, and even during challenging times, cultivating relationships offers optimism and wisdom.

  The power couple behind Milk Bar and 11 Madison Park, Christina Tosi and Will Guadagrele, met through mutual industry connections after Christina gained attention for a cookie collaboration. Meanwhile, driving a Nissan Rogue allows for efficient time management to experience new things, like the fresh scents of Clorox Scentiva that transform spaces. Additionally, Ross offers deals on well-known brands for affordable prices this spring. During their interview, Christina and Will shared insights on cultivating relationships, especially during challenging times like COVID-19. Their unique perspective offers a sense of optimism and wisdom.

• Forming Meaningful Connections: Determination, persistence, and genuine connection are essential in forming meaningful relationships. Whether through charisma or genuine interest, the pursuit of a connection can lead to lasting bonds.

  The speaker shares a unique ability to form meaningful connections with people, whether transactional or genuine. He recounts a story of how he used his charisma and the help of a friend to connect with a pastry chef, Christina Tozzi, whom he had long admired. He was persistent in his pursuit, even asking his friend Paula to keep Christina engaged until he could gather the courage to ask for her number. The speaker also reflects on the importance of genuine relationships versus transactional ones, comparing it to the difference between a child's request for friendship and a real, lasting bond. He concludes by sharing a quote from a paperweight given to him by his father, encouraging the pursuit of goals despite potential failure. Overall, the speaker's story highlights the importance of determination, persistence, and genuine connection in building relationships.

• Expressing and pursuing what you truly want: Confidence and conviction in self-expression and pursuit of goals leads to success and inspires others

  Having the confidence and conviction to openly express and pursue what you truly want in life, whether it's personal or professional, is crucial for achieving success. Passion and self-assurance are rare and valuable traits that can attract opportunities and inspire others. Growing up in an environment that encourages self-expression and respect for one's authenticity can help foster these qualities. By taking things to the next level and being willing to give more of yourself, you can inspire others to do the same and create meaningful connections.

• The Power of Meaningful Relationships: Meaningful relationships provide a safe space for personal growth, encourage authenticity, and instill joy and excitement in life. Investing equally in friendships and recognizing their value beyond shared interests is crucial.

  Meaningful relationships provide a safe space for individuals to be themselves, allowing for genuine connection and personal growth. This is exemplified by the speakers' friendship with Will and Christina, who encourage excitement and relaxation, and create an environment where one can be authentic, warts and all. The speakers' mother also played a significant role in shaping this perspective, instilling in her a sense of making every moment an opportunity for joy and excitement. Additionally, the importance of investing equally in friendships and recognizing their value beyond shared interests and values was highlighted. The speakers' personal journey towards self-discovery led them to understand the importance of finding a quiet confidence in oneself, which is nurtured through meaningful relationships.

• Friendships need investment and growth: Recognize and let go of draining friendships, prioritize those that bring growth, communicate effectively, and take responsibility for maintaining healthy relationships.

  Friendships, like any other relationship, require investment and growth. The speaker shares her experience of recognizing and letting go of friendships that were stagnant and draining her energy. She emphasizes the importance of accountability and communication in maintaining healthy friendships. The speaker suggests that it's essential to evaluate the energy exchange in friendships and consider the time and resources spent on each relationship. She concludes by emphasizing the importance of taking responsibility for maintaining friendships and being willing to put in the effort to keep them alive. The speaker's approach is not about cutting ties harshly but rather about setting boundaries and prioritizing relationships that bring growth and positivity.

• Consider the energy exchange in friendships: Great friendships leave us feeling energized, equitable relationships allow both parties to contribute uniquely and feel valued

  Meaningful friendships are those that leave us feeling energized and refueled. We should consider the energy exchange in our friendships, ensuring they are net positive. A great friendship is like a great meal, leaving us still talking about it long after the interaction has ended. In equitable friendships, each person brings their unique contributions, pouring their energy into the other without expecting it to be returned in the same way. It's essential to remember that relationships should not be equal but equitable, allowing both parties to feel whole and valued.

• Trust and Understanding in Relationships: Building successful relationships involves trust, confidence, and understanding that both parties will be there for each other in good times and bad. Love is defined as giving someone the power to destroy you and trusting they won't use it.

  A successful and equitable relationship is not about keeping track of who does more or initiates more plans. Instead, it's about trust and confidence in each other's reliability and support. The speaker emphasizes that it's natural for people to have off days and that true relationships are built on the understanding that both parties will be there for each other in times of need. The speaker also shares a powerful definition of love as giving someone the power to destroy you and trusting they won't use it. The question then arises about what skills we need to invest in to build and maintain good friendships, and the speaker reflects on the lessons they've learned from their parents. The discussion highlights the importance of trust, confidence, and understanding in relationships, whether romantic or platonic.

• The Power of Small Acts of Kindness: Small acts of kindness towards others, even in insignificant moments, can have a profound impact on their lives. Appreciation and relationship building are essential, especially in challenging times.

  Small acts of kindness and appreciation towards others, even in seemingly insignificant moments, can have a profound impact on people's lives. The speaker shared personal experiences of treating everyone with kindness and respect, no matter their position, and how it was remembered and appreciated years later. In today's challenging times, the importance of relationship and appreciation has become even more apparent. People are rediscovering the beauty in normal moments and finding a deeper appreciation for the things they do every day. The speaker hopes that the forced changes in life brought about by the crisis will lead to a lasting commitment to these practices, making the experience worthwhile. The normal moments that once felt like lows can now be sources of joy and connection through the release of love chemicals like oxytocin and serotonin.

• Investing in friendships is a long-term commitment: Investing in friendships requires focus and commitment, and saying 'no' to some things allows for full investment in others. Happiness comes from looking forward to experiences, like reuniting with friends.

  Investing in friendships is a long-term and stable endeavor, unlike gambling, which comes with unpredictable highs and lows. The speaker shares her experience of learning to reinvest in friendships after realizing they had gambled with them in the past. She emphasizes the importance of saying "no" to some things in order to serve oneself and be able to fully commit to others. The speaker also shares a quote from her father about the secret to happiness being "always having something to look forward to," and encourages focusing on the things one is excited to do again rather than dwelling on what is missed. Specifically, she is excited to spend time in person with friends again, whether it's in or out.

• Embracing Positive Habits Post-Pandemic: The speaker encourages embracing authenticity and patience, continuing positive pandemic habits like family dinners and self-acceptance.

  The speaker is looking forward to continuing some positive habits learned during the COVID-19 pandemic, such as family dinners and being more comfortable with one's appearance. She hopes that these changes will persist after the pandemic, allowing people to be more authentic and patient with each other. The speaker acknowledges that she cannot ensure these changes will last, but she plans to pursue them nonetheless. Additionally, she reflects on how much time and energy are often spent on pleasing others rather than oneself, and she encourages everyone to embrace their true selves. The speaker's parting thought is that while we cannot ensure the future, we can pursue the things that bring us joy and authenticity.

• The Importance of Nurturing Relationships: Investing time and energy in relationships strengthens and maintains personal, professional, and family connections, leading to improved mental health and enterprise value.

  Investing time and energy in relationships is essential for their growth and survival. During a conversation with Simon Sinek, the importance of nurturing personal, professional, and family relationships was emphasized. We often prioritize work and ambition over relationships due to limited resources, but neglecting relationships can lead to their deterioration. Surrounding ourselves with supportive friends and pursuing shared values together can help strengthen and maintain these connections. The speakers also highlighted the inspiration they draw from their own relationships and encouraged listeners to continue investing in their friendships. Mental health and enterprise value were also touched upon, with BetterHelp offering accessible online therapy and Cross Country Consulting providing tailored solutions for accounting, technology, and transactions to help businesses create present and future value. Overall, the conversation underscored the significance of investing in relationships and personal growth for both personal and professional success.