Removing Invisible Armor With Ash Butterss

I’m excited to have Dean Taraborelli with us. He's the innovative mind behind the Sanctuary at Sedona, where he has developed a groundbreaking method for treating addiction and trauma. This unique, non-12 step residential center in Arizona is renowned for its approach to dealing with a broad spectrum of addictions, as well as depression, anxiety, and PTSD.

At the heart of the Sanctuary is its Integrative Addiction Recovery program, a pioneering effort that blends the latest scientific research with ancient healing traditions. This holistic approach treats the whole person rather than just the symptoms. Dean's commitment and dedication have helped countless individuals embark on a journey of healing, empowering them to live fulfilling and enriched lives.

We talk about his personal journey and inspiration for the Sanctuary at Sedona. We explore the moments that set him on the path to recovery and sobriety. Dean shares insights into the core philosophy with an emphasis on health and feeling good. We also discuss the effectiveness of various healing modalities, psychedelics, and more.

• [04:33] Dean shares his journey that led to founding the Sanctuary at Sedona. In his efforts to manage his addiction he went to treatment frequently.

• [06:03] After many relapses, he started expanding his search worldwide. 

• [07:06] He realized that he knew more about addiction than many of the counselors, and realized we need a new model of treatment.

• [08:04] Sanctuary is a non 12-step program, but it's not anti 12-step.

• [09:20] He realized that there was a lot of science that could be applied to getting well and improving mental health.

• [10:29] The mind-body connection is indisputable. Our unconscious mind is more powerful than our conscious mind. The holistic approach enhances the other treatment methods.

• [12:06] The mind influences the body.

• [13:24] Reprogramming the unconscious mind. Repetition, constant hypnosis, and different meditative states. Breath work.

• [14:28] The nervous system can be accessed without talking about a lot of stuff. The nervous system is energy. When we begin to understand what influences this energy the work begins.

• [15:46] Trauma is stored in our brain and affects all of the decisions we make, especially in a time of stress.

• [16:54] We need to work on the monologue that makes our inhibitions.

• [17:34] The program drew from experts like David Perlmutter, Mark Hyman, and Joe Dispenza.

• [18:27] At Sanctuary people are treated with loving, kindness, and care.

• [19:21] Dean went to a conference in Sedona and ended up meeting his future teacher. It was like his talk was for him.

• [20:42] Energy medicine dissipates charge. 

• [22:24] Dean's recovery path is like his wellness path. Recovery means being no longer defined by the use of the substance.

• [23:46] A daily process of health translates into recovery.

• [29:12] The connection between the gut and the brain. Depression and anxiety being caused by inflammation.

• [31:37] For aftercare, the Sanctuary likes the focus on what makes people feel good when finding support.

• [33:43] The core philosophy behind the Sanctuary. Every thought changes the brain so use it to your advantage.

• [35:42] We can up regulate and down regulate genes. They focus on getting to the root cause also.

• [39:01] Inflammation is usually a metabolism related thing.

• [41:30] Some of the most impactful modalities utilized at Sanctuary include a combination of modalities that help quiet the brain and open up the possibilities of different neural networks. 

• [52:34] Psychedelics work on the higher brain as opposed to alcohol or marijuana. What we take is a very personal choice.

• [56:50] Helping people and giving them different ideas and strategies for recovery is Dean's goal. 

• [57:22] Recovery is much better on the other side, and the process isn't going to be as bad as you think it could be.

Links mentioned in this episode:

• Camelback Recovery

• I Love Being Sober YouTube

• The Sanctuary at Sedona

• Dean Taraborelli

• Dean Taraborelli LinkedInGrof Transpersonal Training

Today, we explore the inspiring journey of Cole Chance. Her transformation from the depths of addiction into a beacon of hope in the recovery world is both challenging and enlightening. As a trauma-informed yoga instructor, she skillfully blends the wisdom of yoga and Buddhism with insights from modern neuroscience and psychology. Her approach prioritizes compassionate self-inquiry, guiding students to explore their mind and body for deeper understanding and freedom. This episode delves into Cole's philosophy and teachings, shedding light on how to navigate life's complexities with grace and self-compassion.

Cole's journey began at age 13, marked by numerous treatment programs and relapses before she acknowledged her addiction and the need for change. A significant turning point was her discovery of yoga during treatment, which played a crucial role in managing her stress and breathing. We also discuss the concept of nervous system allyship in recovery, emphasizing the importance of recognizing our mental states and actively learning how to shift them when necessary. Cole's story highlights the profound impact of self-awareness and mindful practices in overcoming addiction.

• [05:01] Cole was having social anxiety, and the minute she began drinking she felt better. She was 13.[06:25] She felt so great, she decided that she would do it forever.

• [08:55] She grew up and was living in Santa Cruz, and she started drinking vodka and orange juice in the morning. She was also  hiding drinking from her partner who was also a big drinker. 

• [12:08] After getting a DUI, she had court ordered treatment. She went to treatment six or seven times, but she wasn't supposed to be there.

• [12:57] Cole shares her first AA meeting experience.

• [15:04] She had a seizure but blamed it on stress. 

• [15:37] She had a pattern of going to treatment whenever she hit a wall, but then after sobering up a bit she realized she wasn't supposed to be in treatment.

• [19:23] She didn't want to admit that she had a problem, because then she would have to do something about it.

• [25:55] She had repeated relapses and the alcohol wasn't making her feel better. 

• [27:16] A friend said that she was going to come to a point where she could either be high or happy.

• [28:02] This realization was when she called a sober living facility and asked for help. 

• [29:28] Her first job was to make it sober for 3 days. That was 10 years ago.

• [30:39] Our lives are a culmination of what happened before so the previous treatments did build.

• [31:19] Just because you relapse, treatment isn't for nothing.

• [35:49] Yoga during her treatment really had an affect on her. 

• [39:32] Yoga is great for the stress of recovery, and it regulates your breath. 

• [43:09] Tim talks about the benefits of a cold plunge and how it can be similar to yoga. 

• [43:30] Nervous system allyship in recovery. The nervous system and brain like to work in patterns and being an ally means you're working with your nervous system.

• [47:18] We shut down when we are in danger. We can mobilize our energy to make something change or just give up.

• [48:40] It's healthy to be able to move through all of the different states that we go through. 

• [49:46] When we understand how we respond, we can do things to help us recreate better patterns. We become an active operator of our nervous system.

• [50:45] Understand how your nervous system responds and then find ways to settle down. If you're anxious, you can hum. This will help stimulate the vagus nerve. Shaking can also help.

• [51:53] If you're shut down, you need to use energy to get to the green. Invite some movement to move into yellow, and then you can move into green.

• [53:42] Whatever state our nervous system is in will be the reality that we see.

Links mentioned in this episode:

• Camelback Recovery

• I Love Being Sober YouTube

• Emerge Recovery

• Cole Chance Yoga

• Cole Chance YouTube

• Nervous System Love

I’m delighted to introduce Deanne Adamson, founder of Being True to You, a groundbreaking program transforming addiction recovery. Deanne combines her extensive background in Mental Health Counseling, Psychology, Philosophy, Theology, Psychotherapy, and Personal Development with her experiences in family services and victim advocacy. 

Her innovative approach aims to revolutionize addiction recovery by offering a dynamic, purpose-driven, and results-oriented platform. This platform not only combats addiction but also challenges the associated stigma, inspiring intrinsic motivation in individuals. Join us in exploring this transformative journey with Deanne Adamson.

We talk about a multifaceted approach to addiction recovery. Deanne emphasizes the importance of recognizing addiction, committing to change, and actively working through the process. She outlines practical steps including building a support team, self-reflection on addiction's impact, and understanding addiction as a progressive condition often exploited in our culture. We also discuss the role of psychedelic therapies in self-assessment, lifestyle examination, and more. .  

• [06:57] Deanne likes to help people find inner and outer steps they can take to help themselves. 

• [08:41] These steps include conceding that addiction has happened and accepting that it's going to be a process to get out of it.

• [09:26] Pledge to change and make it personal to you so that it can drive your recovery.

• [10:02] Start the work and work with the material as it comes up.

• [10:53] External steps include building a support team, finding who you can trust, identifying your support team and finding three people you can confide in.

• [11:41] Write down where addiction has a hold of you and what you can do about it.

• [13:15] Deanne talks about how addiction is externalizing your problems and solutions and getting attached to a certain thing for a feeling or belief. It's a progressive condition that continues to take over your mind.

• [15:14] Addiction is something you do repeatedly in spite of negative consequences.

• [16:24] A lot of people get addicted because the phenomenon of addiction is exploited in our culture.

• [22:25] Deanne values the work and transformation not the quick fix which is the trap of addiction. 

• [23:39] Psychedelic therapies can be really helpful with taking an inventory of oneself and assessing where your mind is at.  A person can pull apart their lifestyle and look at what they are doing that creates the conditions they are in today.

• [25:36] The long-term solution is to feel good on the other side of it.

• [27:23] When you work with a coach who understands addiction they'll understand what you're going through.

• [31:16] The medicine is going to open doors and windows and help show you what you need to do.

• [34:14] Getting and staying sober takes finding a new path in life.

• [42:09] The armor that is protecting our self includes anger, projections, resistance, and emotion in general.

• [45:41] The ego can create a protective armor and we won't want to let people in.

• [47:49] We talk about incremental changes in transformational recovery. Taking the stairs, not the elevator.

• [53:08] We talk about how great it feels when you are able to achieve any goal, even a small one.

• [54:49] To really help someone you need to get into a place of compassion. Autonomy is also important. 

• [01:01:59] Deanne shares what they do at Being True to You, her coaching company. 

Links mentioned in this episode:

• Camelback Recovery

• I Love Being Sober YouTube

• Dopamine Nation: Finding Balance in the Age of Indulgence

• Tiny Habits: The Small Changes That Change Everything

• Being True to You

• 833-379-0070

• Being True to You Facebook

• Being True to You Instagram

There's a growing body of research that suggests porn addiction is on the rise. Jeremy Lipkowitz, a former porn addict, now dedicates his life to helping others overcome their struggles. As a meditation instructor and digital habits expert, Jeremy is committed to guiding men on a journey of mind mastery and the development of fulfilling relationships.

He helps men combat porn addiction and carve out a life filled with purpose and integrity. His work has been featured in publications like Men's Health Magazine and Livestrong. He also pioneered the Unhooked Recovery program, a 30-day transformative experience aimed at breaking the chains of addiction.

Jeremy's background as a Buddhist monk and his credentials as an ICF-certified Executive Coach underpin his approach. Join us as we dive into a conversation with Jeremy, who is here to share his insights on achieving personal mastery and peak performance, through the power of self-love and scientific principles.

• [04:51] Jeremy started looking at porn at a young age and overtime it progressed to addiction. 

• [07:18] The negative effects of porn addiction build up over time.

• [08:17] Jeremy shares when he realized that porn was a problem. 

• [10:57] He realized that he would never be happy if he was always craving sex with new people.

• [11:25] Suffering is the feeling of wanting something you don't have. He was creating this suffering by watching so much porn. 

• [12:18] He was creating super highways of lust.

• [12:54] One of the things that porn does is make you addicted to novelty, instead of cultivating a deep relationship with a person.

• [13:59] Meditation is a way of training the mind.

• [18:36] Mindfulness is a present moment of awareness of what is happening in an open and spacious way that's not trying to push any experience away or hold on to any experience.

• [19:13] Awareness of any of your senses or an emotional state and the orientation you have towards that experience.

• [21:53] Awareness is 90% of transformation.

• [23:08] Jeremy practices Vipassana, or insight meditation. At a retreat, you do nothing but sit and walk for 10 days. You are really present with what's happening. 

• [25:45] You feel a deep peace when you don't need anything more.

• [29:05] Jeremy has spent 10,000 hours watching porn, and he knows what it is like. He's put in the work, and it's his life's passion to help people with addiction.

• [37:18] Porn takes away the sexual energy that you're giving your partner and puts it into porn. 

• [37:55] If you can stop for 30 days, you likely aren't addicted.

• [41:10] Letting go of shame is important. A lot of Buddhism is just looking at what are and aren't wholesome mind states to cultivate.

• [48:06] Mindfulness helps with recovery by giving you a choice about how you want to live.

• [51:03] Jeremy shares his morning routine. 

Links mentioned in this episode:

• Camelback Recovery

• I Love Being Sober YouTube

• Unhooked Podcast

• Jeremy Lipkowitz | Unhooked Podcast Instagram

• Discovery Call for 1:1 Coaching

• The Miracle of Mindfulness: An Introduction to the Practice of Meditation

Have you ever wondered if your vitamins are working or not? My guest today has the answers. Barton Scott is a biochemist, inventor, and founder of Upgradedformulas.com. In 2015, using his chemical engineering background, Barton crafted a new type of mineral known as Stabilized Nano Minerals. 

These minerals are easily absorbed by the body without regular digestion. Plus, his at-home hair analysis testing helps pinpoint nutrient deficiencies, making it easier to address them. Barton is deeply committed to helping people tackle daily stress, sleep issues, hormonal imbalances, and more.

He shares a poignant personal journey inspired by the loss of his mother, underscoring the vital role of mineral balance in our health and emotions. We also touch on the significance of dietary sodium, highlighting the benefits of sea salt. Join us for a captivating exploration into the nexus of nutrition and well-being.

• [04:49] Barton is a chemical engineer, and he studied nutrition. He built a process using nanotechnology equipment to improve mineral absorption. 

• [07:43] He produces an encapsulated gel to help minerals absorb into the bloodstream.

• [08:10] He's now writing a book about how nutrition becomes personality. Our energy levels are determined by us and what we consume.

• [09:27] Too much iron can cause personality shifts. Lack of magnesium will give you anxiety. 

• [11:30] We can't help but be addicted if we're missing things. Testing is the first step.

• [11:55] Barton's passion was inspired from losing his mother. He was involved with nutrition for himself and his loss of his mother. 

• [14:35] Problems with mineral absorption affect almost all bodily functions. Testing can give a map of what minerals we need. 

• [18:37] Hair is tissue and tests with hair are stable.

• [20:49] Lack of lithium can cause anxiety. Minerals are also water soluble. 

• [25:46] Naturopaths actually study nutrition and are likely to give good advice.

• [27:27] Upgraded mood has lithium in it. 

• [29:53] The hair test looks at the hair closest to your scalp. The test is redone every 3 months.

• [30:30] The Dutch test is an adrenal test.

• [32:16] Some minerals do have lower absorption rates. Some nutrients compete with other nutrients for receptor sites.

• [32:55] We need sodium, and sea salt is the best type because it has trace minerals.

• [33:51] Barton talks about iodine and our thyroids. People in Japan eat 15 mg of iodine a day.

• [37:55] Minerals activate the pathways that vitamins need. Boron activates vitamin D.

• [38:27] Barton talks about chelated vitamins and minerals.

• [40:21] We talk about Quinton Hypertonic. Upgraded T shows improvements in fertility issues. 

Links mentioned in this episode:

• Camelback Recovery

• I Love Being Sober YouTube

• Upgraded Formulas Use Code BARTON10 at checkout!

• Barton Scott Instagram

• Upgraded Formulas YouTube

• Total Upgrade Podcast

I’m excited to continue my chat with Mary Tilson. Just yesterday, I was on her show, and we discovered we have so much in common. In 2013, Mary overcame alcohol and drug addiction and has since dedicated herself to assisting others on their journey to sobriety. After reshaping her life, she made it her mission to guide others towards recovery, founding Sun and Moon Sober Living—a community rooted in holistic healing.

As an E-RYT 500 Yoga & Meditation Teacher, a certified Professional Recovery Coach, and an International Retreat Leader, Mary draws from a rich tapestry of ancient traditions combined with modern science. When she's not imparting her wisdom, she can often be found soaking in nature's lessons amidst the majestic mountains of Colorado, where she calls home. Join us as we delve into her inspiring journey.

• [05:11] Mary didn't think she had a problem until she went to college and started experimenting with various drugs. She was blacking out and ended up in terrifying situations. 

• [08:36] She desperately needed help, and called her mom asking for help. 

• [10:01] She also went to yoga daily. When she went back to school, she started drinking and using drugs again, but yoga was also a big part of her life. 

• [11:16] She had no concept of what someone young would do with their life if they were sober.

• [11:36] After graduating, she got a job in digital advertising.

• [13:04] She started doing cocaine late at night. She went to work after being up all night and realized that this wasn't working. 

• [18:58] Trauma informed yoga and meditation. Yoga has an incredible ability to support people during healing. It gives people choice and helps them adapt and make the practice their own.

• [20:12] Movement is more than just working on the physical body. Yoga helped Mary with her recovery.

• [23:48] Fitness is mental, emotional, and spiritual.

• [28:25] Awareness being clean and sober. What are you numbing from?

• [30:18] The difference between trauma informed yoga and regular yoga.

• [33:56] Mary talks about the importance of mindfulness in recovery.

• [36:06] Understanding our nervous system and regulating. Without substances, we do need tools to regulate. 

• [41:12] Mary loves cold plunges and healthy stressors. Mentally you are safe even though it's cold. It's a peaceful state. 

• [46:46] The importance of embracing multiple pathways to recovery. It's not one size fits all.

• [50:48] Recovery is a program of action.

• [51:17] When it comes to habit change, making it small is much more doable. Consistency is also important to carve out new pathways in the brain. 

• [54:04] There's a lot of positive reinforcement when you are sharing your wins.

• [57:50] Having a sober community is really important, because we need that sense of connection.

Links mentioned in this episode:

• Camelback Recovery

• I Love Being Sober YouTube

• Mary Tilson Yoga

• Sun and Moon Sober Living

• Sun and Moon Sober Living Instagram

• Mary Tilson Instagram

• Sun & Moon Sober Living Podcast

• Recovery Through Relapsing With Brandon Lee

• The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma

• Waking the Tiger: Healing Trauma

• Tiny Habits: The Small Changes That Change Everything

Isn’t it time we remove the stigma around mental health, trauma, and addiction? That’s the mission of my guest Ash Butterss, a holistic transformation coach and the visionary behind "Behind The Smile" – a podcast tackling this stigma. 

After choosing sobriety in 2020, Ash left her corporate world, immersing herself in self-development and spearheading the fight against addiction-related stereotypes. Now, combining her skills in yoga and meditation, Ash aids individuals in realizing their utmost potential and cultivating a purpose-driven life.

We talk about the inspiration behind "Behind the Smile," Ash's personal journey that fueled her passion for recovery, the essence of holistic transformation, and her credentials in the field. We delve into the practices essential for deep self-connection, Ash's morning routine, and the pivotal role yoga and meditation play in her healing journey.

• [05:10] Ash created “Behind The Smile” to smash through the stigma of addiction.

• [07:43]  When Ash realized that she was an alcoholic, she also realized that more people needed to feel safe in order to step out and admit they had an addiction.

• [09:51] Ash was a daily drinker for two years and depended on alcohol to numb reality. Eventually, she became physically dependent on it.

• [10:08] February 14th, 2020 was when Ash realized it was time to make a change.

• [19:02] We talk about relapses. You don't lose the knowledge. Relapse is part of the journey. 

• [20:36] The 'gift of desperation' helped Ash stay sober. Having a solution and being willing to do the work helped too. 

• [22:14] She spent 3 weeks as an inpatient. When she got out COVID started and everything shut down.

• [24:39] Vulnerability and opening up is a gift of recovery. 12 Step is a beautiful environment to learn to trust. Ash has connected to her authentic self. 

• [29:51] There are so many amazing things we get to do when we are in recovery.

• [30:15] Holistic transformation is the connection between mind, body, and spirit. Getting clean and sober was essential in order to do the deeper work.

• [31:01] Removing the alcohol made Ash realize that she had some trauma and things to process. 

• [31:35] The holistic transformation model looks at the three sides of mind, body, and spirit. Coping mechanisms create invisible armor.

• [32:48] The armor weighs you down and prevents you from allowing people to get in. It also prevents you from connecting with your heart.

• [33:10] The first thing we have to do to remove the armor is to create awareness. 

• [34:37] The shame we carry isn't ours and we hand it back over. We also need to learn to question our conditioned thoughts.

• [41:05] After Removing alcohol, Ash had to find things to fill the hole. Yoga and meditation became a big part of her life.

• [42:28] Steps to cultivate a deeper connection with self.

• [46:50] Breathwork has changed Ash's life.

• [48:15] Ash shares her morning routine. 

• [56:01] Reaching out to someone is the most powerful thing you can do. 

Links mentioned in this episode:

• Camelback Recovery

• I Love Being Sober YouTube

• Ash Butterss

• Ash Butterss Instagram

• Behind The Smile

• The Miracle Morning (Updated and Expanded Edition): The Not-So-Obvious Secret Guaranteed to Transform Your Life (Before 8AM)

Mike Domitrz has been a featured expert on shows like "Dateline NBC" and frequently quoted in renowned publications like the Wall Street Journal. He is the Founder of The Center for Respect, an acclaimed author, and Hall of Fame speaker. It’s his mission to traverse the globe each year sharing valuable insights with countless businesses, organizations, educational institutions, and even the US military. 

He is one of the preeminent voices on the topic of RESPECT. In our conversation today, we'll delve into what drives Mike's passion, who can benefit from his insights, and address prevalent myths about respect. We'll also discuss the standards he believes in and offer guidance for parents and individuals navigating complex topics related to respect.

• [04:43] The only way someone can say they are an expert is if the industry says that they're an expert. Mike is referred to as the subject matter expert on respect.

• [05:43] When Mike was in college, he found out that his sister was raped. Mike started studying and discovered that consent was something that had to be asked for. 

• [07:44] Mike wanted to speak about consent and respect. This was 33 years ago.

• [09:09] While in college he spoke full-time. He knew society wasn't ready and he took a break.

• [10:04] In 2002, he sold his business and decided to start speaking again. He had a family of six to support and no income.

• [10:58] Going all in to succeed was the right approach for Mike.

• [17:49] Mike shares his audience. He speaks to schools, parents, universities, corporations, and the military. 

• [18:54] When people feel respected at the office they are way more likely to be happy and do a good job.

• [22:08] Mike shares what he teaches about respect to the different groups. 

• [24:26] One of the big lessons Mike teaches is how to say no. 

• [26:32] The biggest myth around respect is that it's earned. Everyone should be seen and valued in the workplace.

• [28:32] The ideal sexual standard for people. We know what we don't want. We need to know what we want. 

• [29:52] Consent is the bare minimum requirement, not the standard of excellence when it comes to whether to have sex or not.

• [31:08] Mutually amazing consensual sex is the point. This shifts the standard.

• [33:51] Consent is a very low bar to teach to our kids as the standard.

• [35:24] Sexual decision making has never been confronted in a room by a speaker. This is a triggering discussion for many.

• [36:20] One of the most common mistakes that parents make when discussing respect is the part about making people respect you. When someone doesn't treat you with respect, move on to someone that does. You deserve to always be treated with respect.

• [40:24] Answer honestly on a date. Be authentic. 

• [42:04] We don't have to say sorry, when saying no to sex. It's okay to say not tonight. 

• [45:49] Overcoming that feeling that you owe someone sex. Saying no isn't rejecting someone, saying no is honoring your body.

• [50:45] We talk about sex and fulfillment at different stages of life. 

• [52:34] What do we do from here? Step back and talk to your partner about having mutual amazing sex. 

Links mentioned in this episode:

• Camelback Recovery

• I Love Being Sober YouTube

• The Center for Respect

• (800)329-9390

• Mike Domitrz

• Mike Domitrz LinkedIn

• Mike Domitrz Instagram

• Mike Domitrz YouTube

Pete Sousa is the  host of the The Payoff with Pete podcast. A podcast for anyone who is working on or thinking about getting sober. He also calls games for ESPN. Pete has been sober for 12 years and is passionate about carrying his message of enjoying a sober lifestyle. Pete’s sobriety was a journey that included ups and downs. His inspiring message is for anyone who needs motivation to continue on their personal sobriety journey.

Some of the things we talk about include: What was Pete's upbringing like and when did he first realize he was an alcoholic? We delve into his professional journey with ESPN and the inspiration behind “The Payoff with Pete”. We also discuss the intriguing concept of “the gift of desperation” and how relapses fit into the recovery journey. Join us as we unravel these topics and more in today's episode.

• [06:47] Pete grew up outside of Philadelphia. He had a good life, but his dad was an alcoholic. 

• [09:39] As a kid, Pete was on Adderall, and it made him feel great.

• [11:46] He discovered in high school that alcohol took away his nerves and anxiety. He drank when he could.

• [14:14] He also found his mom's old prescriptions and took them.

• [15:27] Pete found out he had cardiomyopathy which messed up his football career.

• [16:35] Pete realized he was an alcoholic early in high school and college.

• [20:11] Talking about your story of sobriety helps you stay sober. 

• [21:14] After college, Pete took ecstasy. He also got a job and moved to New York.

• [22:45] Pete didn't like how he was when he was addicted. Pete started doing cocaine in 2000, and by 2002, he was back at home living with his parents.

• [25:02] He took his dad's car and got stopped by the police. The next day he ended up at AA.

• [26:14] The meetings started to work and he kept going.  He still hung out with his old friends, smoked weed, and began drinking again.

• [28:03] He continued drinking for years and when he tried to stop it was hard. He ended up with broken relationships, trouble with the law, and a lot of different problems.

• [30:25] It was finally time for him to go to treatment. After going to rehab, he began to change.

• [31:37] He had a major shift in his life when he finally became coachable. He listened to people who had a life that he wanted to have.

• [33:24] Breaking up while he was in treatment was one of the best things that happened to him. He left a toxic relationship.

• [35:28] After his 30 days of rehab, he went to an extended care center.

• [36:46] Pete started feeling great in sobriety and chased that feeling the same way he used to chase the alcohol and the drugs.

• [37:24] He thought he was above working at KFC, but he got a job there anyway.

• [40:08] Recovery jobs help you go all in. His KFC job gave him confidence and humility.

• [43:41] After recovery, Pete began getting opportunities that he thought he would never get again. He ended up calling games and doing broadcasting jobs.

• [45:31] After being 4 years sober, he got another job with the Hornets. He also saw Michael Jordan again.

• [51:13] November 7th, 2011 was Pete's sobriety date.

• [52:28] Framing recovery as a journey. 

• [53:16] The "gift of desperation" was when Pete began to embrace the journey and go to any lengths to get sober. 

• [58:23] Pete's suggestions for newcomers includes being honest.

• [01:00:33] The Payoff With Pete podcast is about sobriety and inspiring people who want to get sober. 

Links mentioned in this episode:

• Camelback Recovery

• I Love Being Sober YouTube

• Peter Meyerhoff: A Story of Redemption and Drive

• Addiction And Mental Illness Can Take Hold Of Anyone But It DOES NOT Have To Define Who You Are

• The Payoff with Pete

• Pete Sousa Instagram

• Recovery Through Relapsing With Brandon Lee

Matt Jerr, host of the Sober Friends Podcast is here to talk about his experience and strength on his sober journey. We dive into when he realized he was an alcoholic, why he decided to get sober, and what makes him an expert on sobriety and recovery. We also talk about why he considers himself a “high bottom drunk”. 

The Sober Friends Podcast is a weekly show where you can listen to inspiring and honest conversations about sobriety, recovery, and wellness. This podcast is for anyone who wants to learn more about living a sober and fulfilling life. I was on this podcast a few weeks ago, and now it’s time to learn more about Matt. 

• [03:12] Matt had a lot of trauma in his upbringing. His parents divorced when he was three or four years old. Matt lived with his mom, and he grew up poor. 

• [04:32] A lot of people in his family had drinking problems. Matt began drinking when he was sixteen years old. It was hard to get alcohol, and he craved it all the time. 

• [05:05] He was an addict from early on.

• [07:50] The moves he made with his mother created a trauma response in Matt.

• [08:57] He went to college and almost got kicked out, until he turned his life around. He could focus on doing well. 

• [10:12] He began drinking like an alcoholic when he was 17 or 18, but he was in college and everyone drank.

• [11:14] He drank a lot, and would get sick most nights. He questioned his drinking up until age 38.

• [12:50] Matt realized that if he really wanted to stop drinking, everything in his life needed to change.

• [13:29] Not drinking was one of the worst feelings in his life.

• [14:45] His therapist asked him to go to a meeting, he reluctantly went, and finally felt at home. AA was much more fun than he thought it would be.

• [16:27] He felt committed to do it forever. He's never relapsed.

• [19:51] Recovery became his new addiction, and he didn't want to disappoint anyone else in the meetings.

• [22:40] Matt doesn't feel like he's an expert on sobriety and recovery, but he does feel like he can bring a story. He can share what has helped him stay sober. He's also very vulnerable on his podcast.

• [25:26] AA is a program to help people start living.

• [28:29] We talk about vulnerability, intimacy, and learning how to connect.

• [30:02] The "high bottom drunk" is different from a "low bottom drunk" that has to stop drinking or they'll die or lose their family or something really bad. 

• [31:25] Matt was "high bottom drunk". Being called an alcoholic was unacceptable and the worst thing that you could say to him. Knowing he was an alcoholic was the bottom that he knew he had to do something about.

• [33:07] If you're a "high bottom drunk", go ahead and stop drinking. You don't have to wait until you hit rock bottom.

• [35:52] The Sober Friends podcast. Matt had a previous podcast, and he listened to a podcast called Recovery. He thought he could bring something to the table. It wasn't as easy as he thought it would be. It helps him, and it helps other people. 

• [37:32] If you want to start your own podcast, do it!

• [39:55] Starting a podcast can also be another layer of accountability.

Links mentioned in this episode:

• Camelback Recovery

• I Love Being Sober YouTube

• Sober Friends Podcast

• Sober Friends Podcast Instagram

• Matt@SoberFriendsPod.com

• E144: Unmasking the Power of Sobriety: Tim Westbrook's Inspiring Journey