Season 2, Episode 25: Community Building is a Family Affair with Cohost Yvonne Jones

Episode 45 is the season finale for Season 2 for That Social Work Lady Podcast. Recorded on November 12, 2022, this episode pays homage to my sorority Sigma Gamma Rho Sorority, Inc. I am so grateful to the two women who joined me to celebrate our sorority's centennial celebration: Dr. Araba Afenyi-Annan and Educator Leola Banks.  We pledged together at the University of Michigan - Ann Arbor (Iota Psi Chapter) and have each done the work to live out our sorority mission - Greater Service, Greater Progress!

Sigma Gamma Rho Sorority, Inc. was organized on November 12, 1922, in Indianapolis, Indiana, by seven young educators: Mary Lou Allison Gardner Little, Dorothy Hanley Whiteside, Vivian Irene White Marbury, Nannie Mae Gahn Johnson, Hattie Mae Annette Dulin Redford, Bessie Mae Downey Rhoades Martin, and Cubena McClure. The group became an incorporated national collegiate sorority on December 30, 1929, when a charter was granted to the Alpha chapter at Butler University. Since its inception, the dynamic women of Sigma Gamma Rho have built and sustained a well-known and well-respected reputation for leading positive change to help uplift the community through sisterhood, leadership, and service.

LEOLA BANKS, known as Tee to her family and close friends, is a proud native Detroiter and product of the Detroit Public School District; graduating 2nd in her class from Central High School. She currently works as an Assistant Principal with Detroit Public Schools Community District.  Ms. Banks has taught elementary as well as middle school reading, language arts and mathematics.  She also served in various roles (Lead Teacher, Title I Intervention Teacher and Instructional Specialist) prior to her current role in administration. She received a Bachelor of Arts Degree in Communications from The University of Michigan, Ann Arbor and has earned two Master’s degrees in Curriculum & Instruction and Educational Leadership from the University of Detroit Mercy.  Leola is a committed advocate for equity and quality education for under-represented and underprivileged children which has been her motivation for remaining in public education.  Ms. Banks has a close-knit family; two sisters and a very loving mother, her greatest supporter, who raised three girls as a single parent. Additionally, she is a proud member of Sigma Gamma Rho Sorority, Inc., enjoys attending and serving in her church, spending time with family, friends and traveling.  Ms. Banks is honored to be an educator.  She wholeheartedly believes it is her “ministry.” Most importantly, God has had His hands on her for a very long time.  Since her baptism, at the age of 14, she has enjoyed gospel music, reading, and studying the Word of God.  She loves the Lord!

Dr. Araba Afenyi-Annan is a retired academic physician, researcher, and educator. After a life changing injury left her permanently disabled in chronic pain, she was led on a new life path and understanding of healing. As a student and practitioner of A Course In Miracles, she believes her true purpose is to be truly helpful and live a life of Love. Her life is a testament to the power of grace. Now a certified spiritual counselor, facilitator, author and speaker, it is her joy and honor to support others on their journey of spiritual growth and awakening. A mother and co-parent of two teenagers, she believes parenting is an untapped yet vital vehicle for individual and collective transformation. 

To learn more about the illustrious organization, Sigma Gamma Rho Sorority, Inc.:
https://www.sgrho1922.org/
https://www.instagram.com/sgrhoupdates/
https://www.facebook.com/sgrhoupdates

Comediennes are community griots. They make spaces for the stories that we all need to know and tell them with flare and honesty while making us laugh.

enoje (EN-oh-jay) is a community griot. In episode 44, she graces me with her brilliance, and goals for creating space for women to explore comedy for our mental health and well being. She takes her cue from her own mother's laughter. Remembering stories from her childhood of her mother and the aunties being in the kitchen telling each other stories from their day and laughing uncontrollably. Their joy is the focus of her mission. More specifically, extending that joy to as many women who are willing to join in.

enoje is the founder and director of Bish Funny, a comedy project that creates opportunities for women+. She's the host of Let 'Em Eat Laughs, a conversation series about comedians, food, and culture. enoje is an Executive Board member of the Black Women in Comedy Laff Fest in New York. And she is the host and producer of Toronto's recently launched popular comedy series, Ladies Love Cool Jokes.

Follow enoje on
Instagram @funnybishness or
Ladies Love Cool Jokes
The Black Women in Comedy Laff Fest

Abortion is a medical procedure that ends a pregnancy.  Why then is something so basic at the heart of so many toxic conversations?

Episode 43 brings a topic that is very dear to my heart - bodily autonomy. It’s time we reframe the abortion conversation as a discussion about right to privacy and bodily autonomy.  Any other approach to this conversation is problematic and grounded in patriarchal toxicity. American citizens with the capacity for pregnancy deserve to be able to make medical decisions about their bodies with the guidance of medical care professions of their choosing without the interference of people who are ignorant to the actual functions of the female reproduction system. 

Learn more about the facts on abortion and reproductive health:
https://usafacts.org/data/topics/security-safety/child-care-and-safety/foster-care/children-in-foster-care/?utm_source=google&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=ND-StatsData&gclid=Cj0KCQjwqc6aBhC4ARIsAN06NmMfs-NCPJ8aVdLIo10CN5q44b-yhnuANNN0POT1umbfjGf9yo3ainsaAvcaEALw_wcB

https://www.statista.com/statistics/191226/reported-forcible-rape-rate-in-the-us-since-1990/

https://www.plannedparenthood.org/learn/abortion/in-clinic-abortion-procedures

https://www.amnesty.org/en/what-we-do/sexual-and-reproductive-rights/abortion-facts/

https://www.mayoclinic.org/tests-procedures/dilation-and-curettage/about/pac-20384910

Jacqueline M. Baker is a speaker, author, leadership consultant and advisor known for her unique approach to modern etiquette and leadership. As the author of The Unexpected Leader: Discovering the Leader Within You and Leader by Mistake: Becoming A Leader One Mistake At A Time, she frequently speaks and writes on the leadership-for-all concept.

In Episode 42, I got to speak with leadership consultant and entrepreneur Jacqueline M. Baker about her company Scarlet Communications and the impact she has had on leadership training in corporate America. Baker’s story is one of perseverance, finding your niche and pursuing it. From her perspective we are ALL leaders. Listening to her share her unique definition for leadership and the way she teaches etiquette so that her clients will shine no matter the environment they find themselves in, will have you believing and owning your own capacity for leadership.

For more information about the work Jacqueline M. Baker does and to grab a copy of her books, go to:
https://jacquelinembaker.com/
Just Start: From Ideas to Action Podcast

Episode 41 brings another Black woman's story and this time we're getting advice from a leadership expert.

Jacqueline M. Baker is a speaker, author, leadership consultant and advisor known for her unique approach to modern etiquette and leadership. As the author of The Unexpected Leader: Discovering the Leader Within You and Leader by Mistake: Becoming A Leader One Mistake At A Time, she frequently speaks and writes on the leadership-for-all concept.

This conversation that I got to have with Jacqueline M. Baker is a full motivational lesson for the unexpected leader. I appreciate Baker for her uncanny ability to elevate uncommon genius and help the reluctant leaders among us accept our role. Baker reminds us that you don't have to ALL the things you think you need to move in the direction of your goals and dreams. What you need most to START is to know your personal North Star. When you know your North Star, according to Baker, you will know which direction to move in.  I agree with her. Find your North Star and then start.

For more information about the work Jacqueline M. Baker does and to grab a copy of her books, go to:
https://jacquelinembaker.com/
Just Start: From Ideas to Action Podcast

The world has shifted. It has changed. So how do you are a parent of black or brown child pivot to be responsive to the times we live in now?

...parents fear being viewed as inconsistent or worst undermining our own authority by changing our minds. The paradox of that is that there is no better expression of authority to making a change due to changing circumstances or the realization that you didn't do enough due diligence before making a decision.
-Heather Frazier, Pivot Parenting Podcast

Episode 40 explores the need for black and brown parents to revise the parenting strategies we've leaned on for centuries. Our conservatism that served us so well in the 20th century have helped us keep our children safe in a world hellbent on their demise. However, those strategies do NOT help us raise adults who will have the skills they need to navigate life in a global community. We  have to recognize the world our children will 'adult' in is starkly different from the one we are currently 'adulting' in. So how can we continue to use the exact same tools and mindset in our parenting that was used to move us into adulthood? The truth is we undermine our authority with our children when we are restrictive and unmoving. The choke hold placed on kids is what threatens your relationship with your children. When you do more due diligence, when you open yourself up to the possibility that what has always been is not what will always be, you build and solidify the bridge between you and your child.

Rules to Pivoting in Parenting:
1. Pay attention to your child. Remind yourself that who they were at 7 will not be who they are at 12 or 14. Pay attention to the changes they are making in their values and ideas.
2. Get to know the people your child surrounds themselves with both in person and virtually. Most kids in the 21st century who virtual friendships that are completely different from the friends they are around in person.
3. Realize that your child's virtual life is just as vibrant and important to them as their 'real' life. Group chats, direct messaging, gaming squads, are communities that your child is engaged in. They may have a different persona that they take on in each community they navigate.
4. Evaluate if the culture of the spaces you allow your child in aligns with your values and culture or are in alignment with who your child is evolving in to.
5. Remember you can do this!

Other resources to check out:
https://danahirtparenting.com/new-blog/2018/2/9/how-to-pivot-when-changing-parenting-rules
https://www.blackgirlspivot.com/
https://heatherfrazier.com/podcast/

Whew! I'm tired (please read as tiiiii'ed). But I know I'm not the only one out here feeling the multiple levels of tired that I feel.

Episode 39  in this Season 2 is all about rest. Michale Bernard Beckwith once said, "Authentic Rest is power." I read that quote when my son was an infant after my body had been stressed and strained beyond my previously recognized limitations. I thought then that I knew what 'rest' meant. However, according to Dr. Saundra Dalton-Smith I grossly overestimated what I knew. Dr. Dalton-Smith's research demonstrates that we all have 7 buckets that must be filled in order to experience authentic rest. They are Physical, Mental, Emotional, Social, Sensory, Creative, and Spiritual. You may very well be getting all the physical rest you need, that does not mean you are rested! Your rejuvenation and renewal starts with identifying what kind of rest you actually need.

Learn more about Dr. Dalton-Smith:
https://www.drdaltonsmith.com

Get her Book:
Sacred Rest: Recover Your Life, Renew Your Energy, Restore Your Sanity


Don't know who Michael Bernard Beckwith is, check him out as well:
https://michaelbeckwith.com

Special Needs Advocate and Educator Vertongie Kendrix-Bailey  shares in Episode 38, that was stressful to see her toddler cry a lot, act as if he was lost at times and throw tantrums. When he was 4 years old, her son Hezekiah was diagnosed with autism after a comprehensive evaluation by his medical team. The medical team that evaluated Hezekiah included a pediatrician, a psychiatrist, an occupational therapist, a speech and language pathologist, and a nurse. After the evaluation and diagnosis Kendrix-Bailey knew she had to get help for her son.  With that in mind, Kendrix-Bailey took it upon herself to educate herself about autism. She took college courses on children with special needs and autism. Then she began a nonprofit to educate and empower parents and other community members named, Hezekiah Kidz, Inc.

The mission at Hezekiah Kidz, Inc. is to empower children with autism and other disabilities with life skills. This nonprofit aims to move children beyond their disabilities,  provide them with the skills to survive, and prepare them to live a meaningful life.  Hezekiah Kidz, Inc. envisions a world where all children regardless of their disabilities are valued and afforded resources to develop the skills to realize their full potential. Each year Hezekiah Kidz, Inc. hosts an Autism Community Day. This event raises awareness, provides links to community programs for parents of children with special needs, and offers fun activities for families and community members alike. Autism Community Day will take place on Saturday, September 24, 2022 at The Game Room in Livonia, MI.

 Kendrix-Bailey credits her oldest son with laying the groundwork for the mission and purpose of Hezekiah Kidz, Inc. He did this simply by showing his mother that her youngest son may have a diagnosed disability but that doesn't mean he doesn't have abilities! 

Vertongie is a woman of great humility and expansive determination. She is a stroke survivor and parents a child with special needs. What others may see as set backs, Vertongie has turned into set ups for success. Parenting her son who has autism has taught her the importance of advocacy and has propelled her to work diligently to learn as much as she can in order to be the best support not only for her son but for all the children in her community.

Vertongie began her educational journey in Detroit Public Schools. She holds a Bachelor's degree in Business Administration-Accounting, a Master's degree in Administration-Human Resources, and is currently working towards a 2nd Master's in Special Education with her eye on a Ph. D. in Behavioral Health. To say that she believes education is important in setting and achieving your goals would be an understatement.

To learn more about  Vertongie's nonprofit and upcoming events check out:
Hezekiah Kidz, Inc
Autism Alliance
Friendship Circle

In Episode 37, Vertongie Kendrix-Bailey shares her journey as a mother and advocate for her two sons: Zechariah and Hezekiah. Her parenting philosophy guides how she has crafted community to support her values and goals for her family.

As a highly educated professional, Vertongie is the kind of mother who uses all her resources and skills to provide for and advocate for her children and herself. Vertongie also serves as a parent liaison for Children with Special Needs, participates on nonprofit boards, trains parents on how to be better advocates for their children, organizes local campaigns,  and found her own foundation/small business Hezekiah Kidz, Inc.

Vertongie is a woman of great humility and expansive determination. She is a stroke survivor and parents a child with special needs. What others may see as set backs, Vertongie has turned into set ups for success. Parenting her son who has autism has taught her the importance of advocacy and has propelled her to work diligently to learn as much as she can in order to be the best support not only for her son but for all the children in her community.

Vertongie began her educational journey in Detroit Public Schools. She holds a Bachelor's degree in Business Administration-Accounting, a Master's degree in Administration-Human Resources, and is currently working towards a 2nd Master's in Special Education with her eye on a Ph. D. in Behavioral Health. To say that she believes education is important in setting and achieving your goals would be an understatement.

To learn more about a few of the program Vertongie supports check out:
Hezekiah Kidz, Inc
DAPCEP
CHADD
Autism Alliance of Michigan

Episode 36 continues our conversation with Detroit's very own #communitycounselor Patrece M. Lucas, MS, LPC.

Patrece specializes in providing culturally specific counseling and creating safe healing spaces for African, Black, and other indigenous and BIPOC communities. She has committed her life's work to advocating for communities of color to not only survive but to dismantle broken systems and create new ones that are inherent on supporting and uplifting the communities capacity to thrive.

As a licensed Mental Health Counselor Patrece serves as a community counselor in Detroit and its surrounding communities.  She is in private practice as a counselor, wellness partner and mediator at her agency called indigo transitions.

In Episode 36, we learn more about Community Counselor Patrece Lucas's approach to mental health services and the origins of her program "Coffee with a Counselor." At the root of her motivation is to destigmatize mental health service and access for the Black community. She understood that in order to get more Black people engaged with a mental health professional she would first have to demystify the idea of 'going to therapy.'

You can connect with Patrece via
CoffeewithaCounselor@gmail.com
indigo transitions 
Where do Black Women Go to Grieve?