Shut The Freak Up, with Joseph McClendon III

Hi guys I’m Dan Reed, and welcome back to The Career Dad Show

It’s been a minute… or several months… and to be honest, I needed a bit of a break. If I can’t practice what I preach, then what good am I?

Anyway, it’s great to be back, and let me introduce you to Amit.

Amit realised his career in banking was impacting his mental health, and he was becoming someone he didn’t like. He decided to jack it all in and start a business - during lockdown - with a 2 and a 4 year old at home. Amit believed in plan B, and now helps others do the same.

Today I’m joined by father-of-3 Paul Tremain, better known on Instagram as the Multidad. 

We talk about Lockdown 3.0, balancing work and family, imposter syndrome, as well as reflecting on how Paul felt when he found out he was having twins. 

This is an amazing episode if you’re expecting twins, trying to balance work with family, or want some tips on dealing with imposter syndrome.

So here we are - the end of 202 is upon us.

I wanted to take this opportunity to thank you for your support this year. Whether it's been listening to the podcast, watching the videos, interacting with the socials... I appreciate it all.

Have a fantastic Christmas - and see you in 2021!

How are angels made? When Bryson’s mom passed away, he thought about how to communicate this with his son. So he wrote a book. Following a successful Kickstarter, How Angels Are Made was published. 

This isn’t Bryson’s job, though. He runs the back-office of his wife’s chiropractic clinic, and has been the main caregiver to his 3 kids during Covid. How does he find the time? By auditing his 24 hours…

Contents

• 1m 02s: Atlanta, Georgia: The great melting pot
• 5m 34s: When the daughters came along…
• 10m 01s: Being an essential worker (with 3 kids)
• 15m 33s: How Angels Are Made: a book to help kids deal with group
• 20m 02s: Learning about Kickstarter
• 23m 42s: We all have 24 hours
• 27m 57s: I plan out the next 5 years
• 34m 25s: Every kid is different

Starting a marketing agency just before Covid wasn’t part of the plan, but 12 months later and Yonder is going from strength to strength.

Chris left his well-paid corporate gig to fulfil a decade-long dream, and also adopted two kids along the way. Chris shares his take on digital marketing and business, as well as the emotions around adopting.

There never was the right time to do any of this, but at some point Chris realised that when he said 'I'll do it when...' was just another way of saying 'I'm afraid to'. So he did it.

Contents

• 1m 21s: I grew up in a Southern Baptist Preacher’s house
• 6m 01s: Empathy has been the key to success
• 12m 21s: Turning down Disney was turning down a dream
• 15m 48s: That classic side-hustle
• 18m 26s: The decision to adopt
• 30m 18s: ‘Balance’ is a constant struggle, but golf helps
• 36m 11s: The future of Yonder
• 37m 48s: You don’t have to be perfect

Ruben is known as The Luge Man. He’s the first person to compete in 4 Olympics over 4 different decades.

He talks to me how had the dream - and the perseverance - to become an Olympian, and how finding mentors is the key to unlocking success.

Ruben’s also homeschooled his kids (now 15 and 18) from Day 1, which gives us a lot to talk about with Covid…

Contents

• 0m 45s: Who is The Luge Man?
• 5m 53s: Did you really pick the luge by process of elimination?
• 7m 40s: Finding a mentor, being shy, and food stamps
• 15m 35s: Would you change anything about your journey?
• 18m 30s: My kids on finding their own Olympics
• 24m 15s: Homeschooling
• 31m 33s: 90 minute chunks of time
• 33m 49s: Best advice for new parents

At 17, Joseph was beaten to within an inch of his life by 3 men because of the colour of his skin.

The shame and self-loathing led to Joseph being homeless as a teenager, until a man gave him a book that changed his life.

Joseph’s now a Doctor of Neuropsychology, a lecturer, a performance coach, and a father. Listen as Joseph explains why we all need to Shut The Freak Up.

Contents

• 1m 03s: 3 grown men tried to take my life because of the colour of my skin
• 4m 03s: Homeless by 18
• 6m 01s: Luck and serendipity are manufactured 
• 9m 41s: Covid: There’s no ‘New Normal’
• 12m 24s: Is adversity the best teacher?
• 15m 07s: The ’S’ word: Scheduling
• 19m 48s: Feel, felt, found
• 22m 41s: Co-parenting as a single dad
• 27m 35s: There’s greatness in all of us
• 29m 12s: The Black Baby Doll Experiment
• 35m 32s: Shut The Freak Up

Chris had a successful career in corporate sales, taking on the highs and lows that came with it. As he says, ‘I was operating from a place of low self esteem’. 

He’s overcome addictions and now is happily married, and has a 13 year old son - who Chris is proud to be the father to that he didn’t have. 

Chris also started the EFA Movement: Empowered Fathers in Action, which helps good dads become great dads.

Contents

• 1m 21s: The lifestyle of a sales person
• 3m 58s: Operating from a place of low self esteem
• 5m 45s: Becoming the dad that I wanted to have
• 8m 04s: My son and virtual learning
• 10m 15s: The Fortnite debate and staying safe online
• 13m 45s: Co-dependent vs inter-dependent
• 19m 42s: How do you map your future?
• 21m 36s: EFA: Empowered Fathers in Action
• 27m 47s: Given what you’ve been through… would you change any of it?
• 29m 56s: It all starts with Wellness (and the 8 pillars)
• 34m 15s: What are the hopes for your son?
• 37m 10s: Fatherly advice: Learn to relate and understand your children

Despite being in his early 20s, Brendan has presented over 900 times.

His participation in Case Competitions (as Brendan describes them: professional sport for nerds) landed him a role at IBM.

But that’s not enough for him. Brendan started a YouTube channel called MasterTalk, where he teaches others how to unlearn the fear of public speaking.

There’s so much advice packed into this episode - enjoy!

Contents

• 0m 48s: Let’s talk about talking
• 3m 06s: Where the fear of public speaking comes from
• 6m 50s: Unlearning the fear
• 11m 27s: Reducing the fraud
• 14m 39s: Public speaking vs workplace presentations
• 17m 56s: This didn’t come naturally (nor did the language)
• 20m 40s: How Case Competitions work
• 23m 50s: What the future holds
• 26m 25s: Ask yourself one hard question about life every day
• 30m 31s: Giving away my best bits for free
• 35m 03s: The random word exercise