Podcast Summary
Embracing Unique Qualities: The Value of Being Socially Awkward: Despite feeling awkward in social situations, socially awkward individuals can provide unique perspectives and insights, adding value in various aspects of life.
Being socially awkward, while challenging, can have unexpected advantages. CrossCountry Consulting, as a trusted advisor, helps businesses create present and future value through tailored solutions for accounting and risk, technology, and transactions. At the 2024 Black Effect Podcast Festival, Nissan offers an opportunity to pitch podcast ideas, and Clorox Scentiva provides a refreshing cleaning experience with its coconut scent. Tai Tashiro, a psychologist, studied social awkwardness and wrote a book about it. He shared that his own experiences of being socially awkward started in childhood. Despite feeling uncomfortable in social situations, he found comfort in observing others and learning from their interactions. The conversation with Tai highlighted the importance of embracing our unique qualities, even if they make us feel awkward at times. He emphasized that socially fluent people might benefit from the perspective and insights of socially awkward individuals. So, whether it's through business growth, personal experiences, or podcast pitches, remember that there's value in being true to ourselves, even when we feel awkward.
Understanding Social Awkwardness: Empathize with socially awkward individuals, they may possess unique qualities. Learn skills to improve social abilities and study socially fluent individuals to understand their innate or learned skills.
Social awkwardness is a common struggle for many individuals, and it can be a barrier to forming meaningful connections. The speaker shares his empathy for friends who have had a hard time socializing and the impact it has on both parties involved. He also explores the connection between social awkwardness, introversion, and extroversion, acknowledging that there are socially awkward introverts and extroverts. The speaker proposes the term "socially fluent" for those who are not socially awkward and suggests that awkward individuals can learn skills to improve their social abilities. He encourages studying socially fluent individuals to understand the innate or learned skills they possess. Ultimately, the speaker emphasizes the importance of understanding and empathizing with those who struggle socially, as they may be hiding unique and interesting qualities.
Underestimating the Challenges of Social Fluency: Socially awkward individuals face challenges in maintaining social norms outside of controlled environments, but can overcome these challenges through observation, practice, and patience.
People often underestimate the effort and skills required to appear socially fluent, especially in public speaking. While some may perceive socially awkward individuals as lacking the ability to engage in social situations, the truth is that many have honed their skills to a high degree in controlled environments like public speaking. However, outside of these controlled situations, socially awkward individuals may struggle with maintaining social norms due to a lack of practice and experience. For instance, maintaining appropriate personal space, making eye contact, and responding appropriately to questions can be challenging for those who are socially awkward. To overcome these challenges, individuals can observe and learn from socially fluent people, practicing hyperawareness and eventually making these behaviors more natural. A common misconception is that socially awkward individuals should focus on the minutiae of social interactions, such as the exact length of eye contact. However, a general guideline of maintaining eye contact for about 3 seconds at a time and looking away for about 1 second can be a good starting point. Ultimately, the journey to improving social skills involves a combination of observation, practice, and patience.
Socially awkward individuals often avoid looking at the eye region during social interactions and instead focus on the chin or ear area.: Socially awkward individuals reduce emotional overwhelm during social interactions by focusing on areas with less social information, like the chin or ear.
Socially awkward individuals may avoid looking at the eye region during social interactions due to its emotional intensity. Instead, they tend to look at areas like the chin or ear, which contain less social information. This behavior helps reduce the emotional overwhelming nature of social interactions for them. However, it's important to remember that everyone processes social situations differently, and what may be uncomfortable for some might be natural for others. For those who find this topic relatable, they might appreciate the podcast "How I Built This," where entrepreneurs share their stories of building successful businesses despite moments of doubt and failure. The podcast offers valuable insights into innovation and creativity. Additionally, for Mother's Day, consider gifting a Bartesian countertop cocktail maker to take the hassle out of preparing premium cocktails for mom. With over 60 cocktail options and real fruit juices, it's a thoughtful and practical gift that can be enjoyed every day.
Awkwardness's Evolutionary Value: Awkwardness, though often seen as a disadvantage, offers unique perspectives, creativity, and exceptional achievements through persistence and obsession
Awkwardness, though it may seem like a disadvantage, has significant evolutionary value. While socially fluent individuals were likely favored for procreating due to their alpha status, awkward individuals carried on through their genetic predisposition and obsessive interests. This obsession leads to persistence through challenges and, eventually, exceptional achievements. Moreover, awkward individuals offer unique perspectives and creativity to society, adding diversity to group thinking and potentially uncovering new resources. Despite the self-consciousness and insecurity that often come with awkwardness, it is essential to recognize its value in observing the world in a different way and contributing to innovation.
Understanding Awkwardness: Acknowledging awkwardness can be appreciated, it's normal during adolescence, and strategies include improving social skills or finding compatible social environments.
Being socially awkward and having low self-esteem are not necessarily connected. While acknowledging one's awkwardness might seem daunting, it can actually be appreciated by others for its straightforwardness. Adolescence is the time when awkwardness often emerges due to the rapid changes and new social expectations. Awkward moments are simply deviations from minor social expectations, and the discomfort arises when there's a gap between these expectations and one's ability to meet them. A useful strategy to navigate social situations is to either work on improving social fluency or seek environments where social expectations align better with one's abilities.
Choosing social environments for success: Recognize quieter settings for flexibility and less pressure, focus on getting others to talk, and choose environments that suit your preferences for positive social interactions.
Understanding the social expectations of different environments and putting yourself in situations where you can thrive is a key strategy for those who find social interactions challenging. This means recognizing that smaller, quieter settings like a dinner table allow for more flexibility and less pressure to perform compared to louder, more chaotic environments like parties or clubs. Additionally, focusing on getting the other person to talk and showing genuine interest in what they have to say can lead to positive social interactions, while forcing yourself into uncomfortable situations can lead to unnecessary stress and discomfort. It's important to remember that everyone has unique preferences and skills, and setting yourself up for success by choosing social environments that suit you best can lead to more enjoyable and successful interactions.
Socially awkward and fluent individuals can learn from each other: Both socially awkward and fluent individuals have unique strengths and weaknesses. Socially awkward individuals can learn social skills, while socially fluent individuals can practice compassion and understanding. Seek help, practice self-awareness, and remember that everyone faces challenges and can achieve great things with determination and resilience.
Both socially awkward and socially fluent people can learn valuable lessons from each other. For socially awkward individuals, they can learn how to navigate social situations more effectively, such as initiating conversations and dealing with awkward silences. On the other hand, socially fluent people can learn that awkward individuals are just as kind and trustworthy as anyone else, and that everyone deserves compassion and understanding. Moreover, it's essential to recognize that everyone has unique social strengths and weaknesses, and no one is perfect in every social situation. It's important to remember that social skills can be learned and improved upon, and seeking help from resources like therapy can be beneficial for individuals who struggle with social interactions. Additionally, the discussion highlighted the importance of self-awareness and finding the right balance of socializing for one's individual needs. Ignoring one's social battery and spreading oneself too thin can lead to exhaustion and negatively impact overall well-being. Finally, the conversation touched on the inspiring stories of successful entrepreneurs who faced challenges and setbacks but persevered to build thriving businesses. These stories serve as reminders that everyone encounters obstacles, but with determination, resilience, and a willingness to learn, we can overcome them and achieve great things.
Valuable Qualities of Awkward People: Awkward people possess valuable qualities like empathy, determination, and a deep passion for solving complex problems. We can learn from their persistence and discipline in pursuing their passions.
Awkward people, despite their perceived social disadvantages, possess valuable qualities that socially fluent individuals can learn from. These qualities include empathy, determination, and a deep passion for solving complex problems. The speaker shared a personal experience of working with an awkward yet brilliant chief technology officer, who created an environment that allowed him to thrive and focus on the problem at hand. The awkward person's persistence and discipline in pursuing their passions is something that the socially fluent can strive for. A specific childhood memory the speaker shared was receiving a rainbow jacket from his father, which he cherished and was a significant moment in his life. Overall, the speaker emphasizes the importance of recognizing and valuing the unique strengths of all individuals, regardless of their social status or perceived quirks.
The importance of being thoughtful, fair, and self-reliant: Learning from past mistakes, being fair and generous, and committing to self-reliance can help us navigate life's challenges and grow into our best selves.
Being thoughtful, fair, and self-reliant are valuable qualities in life. The speaker's experience of stealing an item as a child and her father's reaction taught her the importance of being fair and generous towards others. This lesson has stayed with her and influenced her work in helping others become self-reliant and successful. Her awkwardness, which once caused distress, has become a source of strength and resilience. The conversation highlights the importance of being thoughtful, fair, and self-reliant, and the power of these qualities in helping us navigate life's challenges. It's never too late to learn and grow from our experiences, and being true to ourselves is an essential part of that journey. The speaker's work reflects her commitment to helping others become their best selves and find their own path to success.
Accessing Mental Health Support and Ocean Conservation: BetterHelp offers online therapy for affordable and convenient mental health support. Monterey Bay Aquarium inspires conservation efforts to protect the ocean for future generations.
Everyone, regardless of their background, can face mental health challenges, and having access to affordable and convenient mental health support can make a significant difference. BetterHelp offers online therapy, providing flexibility and affordability compared to in-person therapy. Additionally, it's essential to protect the ocean for future generations, and Monterey Bay Aquarium is dedicated to inspiring conservation efforts. Lastly, learning to manage finances effectively and breaking free from financial misconceptions can lead to a comfortable and financially secure lifestyle, with State Farm as a trusted partner.
