BBXX: Let's Get Intimate!

Dr. Kate Balestrieri is a sex-positive therapist whose clinical focus is to help people heal from trauma, establish healthy boundaries, build effective communication strategies, improve relationships, and enhance their sex lives. Her work places extra emphasis on the connection between thoughts, feelings, and physical sensations in order to help people create transformation in their lives and relationships through the mind-body connection. 

Guided by the synthesis of multiple theoretical approaches—including psychodynamic, affect regulation, interpersonal neurobiological, attachment focused, cognitive behavioral, somatic and systemic principles—she incorporates evidenced-based research into her counseling services. 

Dr. Kate Balestrieri is also the Founder of the platform Modern Intimacy, which provides an inclusive space for people to get access to education about important but stigmatized topics that people live with every day, related to trauma, relationships, sexual health, and sexual sexual problems.

In our conversation, we explore different definitions of pleasure, joy, and contentment—and the importance of challenging our default definitions of everyday terms. We discuss the relationship between sexual pleasure and non-sexual pleasure, how pleasure is something we are innately capable of yet culturally conditioned away from, the role of shame and self-sabotage, and how we can cultivate a pleasure practice to reclaim pleasure in our lives. 

Dr. Jeremy Goldberg is a PhD scholar who spent the past five years studying the science of human behavior, specifically how attitudes affect action and how we can communicate to inspire greater and lasting change. He is a TEDx speaker, coach, founder of Love Distance Love Bombs and host of The Long Distance Love Bombs Podcast.

We talk about how to stop being afraid of standing up for yourself or having hard conversations, learn how to ask for what you want and express your needs with confidence, step into your power and care less about what other people think, and how to understand and unpack the stories we tell ourselves in order to get the life we want as a result.

Dr. Amy Moors research focuses on issues related to gender, sexuality, diversity, and well-being. For example, examining diverse expressions of sexuality, including how stigma affects well-being among sexual minorities and people engaged in consensually non-monogamous relationships. Her research has been featured in TIME, Scientific American, and The Atlantic. 

In addition to serving on the faculty at Chapman University, Dr. Moors is a Research Fellow at The Kinsey Institute at Indiana University and the co-chair of the American Psychological Association’s Division 44 Consensual Non-Monogamy Task Force. 

We discuss the meaning of consensual non-monogamy (CNM), important terms and terminology, misconceptions about CNM relationships, how CNM and monogamous relationships are similar vs. different, what we can learn from types of relationships different from our own, and some of the surprising findings from her research.  

Sasza was recently interviewed by Stella Stephanopoulos as a guest on the Everyday Endorphins podcast. We received so much positive feedback from it that we decided to reshare it here on the BBXX podcast! 

Stella interviews Sasza about building a deeper understanding of ourselves and how the relationship with ourselves is the pathway towards creating deeper, more intimate, relationships with others. They explore why many people tend to find romantic partners when they least expect it, what it means to date intentionally, the role of patience and timing, and how Sasza manifested her partner through a love letter. They also discuss self care as a form of self respect and how we all embody yin and yang energy in different ways.  

We talk about the mind-body connection, high performance habits, breaking down old beliefs, how to move from a state of mental stress to mental strength, and how to work towards the ultimate goal of success without sacrifice. We also share tips for how to design a “sensory diet” in order to escape from the overstimulation that plagues our modern day-to-day lives. 

Dr. Blossom is a doctor of occupational therapy and high performance coach. She works with high-achievers and high-achieving organizations and leverages the latest science and research related to the body-mind connection in order to demonstrate how the power of your brain paired with high performance habits can radically reshape the direction of your life and work.

We talk about the mind-body connection, how to influence our bodies through our mind—and inversely—how to influence our mind through our body. 

We explore what sex represents, the meanings we attach to it, and some common anxieties and fears underlying it. We discuss shame, the purpose it serves, where it originates from, and ways to liberate ourselves from shame through awareness and exploration of ourselves and our relationship to sex & sexuality.  

Arlyn Owens is a psychosexual therapist, educator, and registered nurse. Arlyn provides counseling and therapy around the topics of sexuality, intimacy, and relationships. His areas of expertise include communication, shame and identity, kink, and consensual non-monogamy.

A few months ago, I made up this thought exercise, and I couldn’t get it out of my head. I kept coming back to it, kept feeling relief from it, and kept getting positive feedback from people I had shared it with. It might be a tough pill to swallow, but it’s actually liberating, and it forces a perspective shift that can be game-changing in your relationship.

This is the story that challenged me in a big way—and a really great way. I’ve never thought of blame, accountability, or responsibility the same ever since, and it’s been game-changing in my relationships.

Have you ever felt frustrated with where you are in life? How did you get to where you are now? Did you choose the life you’re currently living or did it sort of happen by default? Have you consciously, intentionally designed the life you are living, or do you feel like things are happening to you and out of your control?

These are some of the thought-provoking questions we reflect on as we explore how to live a life by design rather than by default! We talk about how to recognize when you’re not living a life true to yourself, how to understand what your core values are, and how to live in deeper alignment with those values. We share advice for ditching the default life, redefining success and failure, creating goals, building consistent habits, and incorporating more fun and play into your daily life.

Kate House believes that “if nothing changes, nothing changes” and seven years ago she decided to change everything. She realized by not changing her circumstances she was actually choosing to stay in them. She left her job to pursue a new path that was better for her health, her family, and her happiness. She is now a certified health coach and host of the “Live By Design” podcast. 

Want to experience more positive feelings, a stronger sense of life satisfaction, and less negative emotions in your life? Join us for a conversation to uncover the key ingredients that will maximize your happiness and well-being. 

Stella Stephanopoulos is the host of the Everyday Endorphins podcast, which hosts conversations on the nuances of mental health and wellness with the goal of inspiring others to feel empowered to take control of their own wellbeing by focusing on what brings them joy and happiness. Stella has a degree in Philosophy-Neuroscience-Psychology and is a contributing writer for Thrive Global.

We talk about eudaimonic vs. hedonic well-being, positive psychology, type 1 vs. type 2 fun, comparison as the thief of joy, the role of guilt, pride, and shame in hustle culture, how to evaluate your own happiness and wellbeing, and the best habits to help increase your sense of happiness and well-being. 

This is Part Three in a series of ongoing conversations with Adriana Robertson and Michael Fenchel about how to co-create your dream relationship. 

We talk about how to consciously create spaces for connection to thrive in your relationship, incorporating more fun and play into your relationship routine, and keeping the spark burning. 

We talk about how to establish agreements and boundaries that protect your partnership, tips and tricks for weekday or weekend connection rituals, and how to give or receive the gift of “spoiling sessions.” 

If you haven’t listened to our previous Humans of Intimacy episodes with Adriana and Michael, or our previous episodes in this series, then be sure to check them out!

This is Part Two in a series of ongoing conversations with Adriana Robertson and Michael Fenchel about how to co-create your dream relationship. 

We might think we know everything about our partner, but that’s not actually possible. We’re constantly learning and growing as individuals, and our relationships should also be evolving along with us. Approaching our relationship from a place of curiosity helps us create shared understanding in our relationships, which is one of the most important antidotes to conflict. 

We talk about how to get through tough times in a relationship, how to react when you are in the midst of a conflict, proactively preventing conflict through shared understanding, and how to know when it’s worth it to keep investing in your relationship vs. call it quits.  

If you haven’t listened to our previous Humans of Intimacy episodes with Adriana and Michael, be sure to check them out!

This is Part One in a series of ongoing conversations with Adriana Roberton and Michael Fenchel about how to co-create your dream relationship. 

We talk about the importance of shared understanding, defining agreements in your relationship, and strategies for repairing conflict. We explore desires, fears, and boundaries as a powerful tool for communication, as well as other tips, tricks, and strategies to include in your Couples Toolkit. Most importantly, we explore how to know when a relationship is worth fighting for—and how to recognize if it’s time to walk away. 

If you haven’t listened to our previous Humans of Intimacy episodes with Adriana and Michael, be sure to check them out!

What’s one thing that you want to unlearn? Sometimes, it’s less about what we need to *learn* and more about what we need to *unlearn* in order to be able to live the life and the relationships that we truly desire. 

We talk about the biggest lessons learned from dating, challenges in the relationship with ourselves, the process of unlearning, normalizing the hard and ugly part of the journey, and advice for what to do when it feels like you’re deep in the mud of your own personal development. We explore how to tap into the most authentic version of yourself, how to show up the way you actually want to in relationships, and what it feels like to live in relationships that are aligned with your values.

Michael Fenchel is the co-founder of Breathe For Change, the largest yoga teacher training in the United States. He has co-founded and grown four companies including PRDX, a movement dedicated to empowering entrepreneurial leaders to create more belonging and flow in their lives, relationships, and teams.

How many of us have accepted ourselves fully, for everything that we are? Most of us still have a long way to go and many parts of ourselves still yet to be acknowledged let alone accepted. Adriana Robertson has become a master in helping people reclaim the many different pieces of themselves—the good, the bad and the ugly—in order to find wholeness. 

We talk about how relationships serve as mirrors to see ourselves in a different way and how we can learn, grow, and heal with another person. We learn how to tap into our intuition, discover our inner wisdom, and create an internal compass in order to better guide ourselves, our decisions, and our relationships. 

Adriana has been a Harvard leadership trainer, international development leader, and a coach & facilitator for over 10 years. She is now the co-founder of PRDX, a movement dedicated to empowering entrepreneurial leaders to create more belonging and flow in their lives, relationships, and teams.

This piece of advice will change the way you think every day. It will help you cultivate more empathy for others and more appreciation for yourself in everything you do.

Have you ever felt stuck in "analysis paralysis"? It's time to think differently about how we make decisions. Here's an easy trick so that you can make the right decision—every time. This perspective shift changed my life.

Without realizing it, most of us don’t use these words correctly. While envy tends to seem like just a stronger version of jealousy, the psychology and meaning behind it are of important difference. We love to examine the way that subtle linguistic differences can shape the way we communicate and connect with one another :)

Do you know the difference between giving thanks and expressing gratitude? While similar in some ways, the use cases for each are different and, as always, we love to examine the way that subtle linguistic differences can shape the way we communicate and connect with one another :)

Vitale Buford is an executive coach, international speaker, and author of the book, "Addicted to Perfect," in which she explores her 10-year struggle with Adderall and perfectionism.

If you hear the word "perfectionism" and you don't think it's relevant to you, please have a listen anyway. This episode is going to surprise you.

We talk with Vitale about the deeper issues that perfectionism stems from as we learn about its relationship to self-worth, personal criticism, codependency, abandonment, and its role as a coping mechanism. We also discuss the danger of living a life focused on trying to please others and the consequences of living your life without really knowing who you