Building Strong Homes, One story at a time.

Is hospitality something that doesn't come easy for you? Are you always worried about how clean (or messy!) your home is? Or that you can't cook? Or that you just don't know how to entertain? My guest today, Sue Donaldson, is the queen of hospitality and she's here to help. Yes, she grew up with a mother who loved welcoming people into their home, but Sue's grandmother, her mom's mom, never invited people in. In spite of that, she decided she wanted to learn how to be hospitable and did just that. 

Now, because of her mother's influence, Sue's gift of hospitality is second nature for her. But she's learned that it's not about a clean house or even entertaining, it's about serving others.  Pinterest and Instagram have skewed our ideas of hospitality, but Sue has so many practical and creative suggestions about how to make it easy for you. 

She also talks about how being a mother of young children is like living on a desert island (amen!) and how important it is to have a community of other moms around you and one of the best ways to do that is by inviting those moms in. Yes, welcoming people past the threshold of your front door can be vulnerable, but it can also be very rewarding. 

We also talk about mentoring and a secret to make it easier for both the mentor and the mentee. And Sue has some great free resources she'll share at the end of our interview. You'll be excited to start welcoming people into your home after you listen to this episode.

As the mother of a son, I understand the challenges of raising boys to become good and godly men. When my son was young, I was always second guessing myself and wishing I had a blueprint to help me, and my husband know the best way to lead him down the right path towards manhood. This episode is a resource I wish was available then.

My guests today, Erin and Jason Davis, parents of four boys themselves, have recently released their book, Lies Boys Believe: And the Epic Quest for Truth. In this episode they share why giving our boys a foundation based on truth will help them navigate our difficult culture, how we should encourage our sons to have hearts that please God, not just behave in a way they won't get caught, as well as developing a no-secrets family. I also asked several moms of boys if they had questions for the Davis's and they had some great ones! Erin and Jason were so gracious to answer as many as they could and so this episode is a little longer than most. But I know you're probably struggling with some of these same questions, so I wanted to make sure we addressed them. They have so many practical ideas on how to connect with boys that I know you're going to come away from this episode better equipped and more confident to be the best boy parent you can be.

Check out the show notes at CarolRoper.org/podcast

Is the current status of our world, nation and maybe even your community getting you down? Do some days make you wonder if you’ll ever experience joy again because there’s so much hard in your life right now? My guest today, Brant Hansen, will help us look at the bright side of things by turning our focus to all of the good that is around us. And y’all, I can’t believe this, but I called him by the wrong name a couple of times in this interview and he wouldn’t let me edit that out!

Brant has a humble and empathetic heart and an amazing sense of humor that allows him to share stories from his own life that encourage and lift people up. One of my favorite quotes from this episode is when Brant says, “Maybe we need to all learn how to be awkward. It’s not the worst thing in the world. I could survive that.” He shares many of his awkward moments to prove he knows what he’s talking about. So, let’s learn to get over ourselves and experience joy in the hard.

Mike Novotny is not one to run from tough topics. As a matter of fact, he's even written a book about it called Taboo: Topics Christians Should be Talking About but Don't. Sounds pretty intriguing, right? In this episode we dive into topics that deal with mental health, suicide, pornography and politics. Mike also shares some of his personal struggles as well. I appreciate the fact that Mike isn't just sharing his opinions about these hot-button issues, but that he goes straight to the Bible to share what God says about them. I hope this episode will encourage you to not shy away from tough topics and stand strong on God's word for answers to tough questions.

Molly Stillman has lived the type of life that when shared, people stop in their tracks and ask, “Wait, what happened?” Molly’s mother, Lynda Van Devanter Buckley served as an Army nurse during the Vietnam War and wrote the bestselling memoir, Home Before Morning. When Molly was seventeen, Lynda passed away after an eight-year battle with an autoimmune disorder due to her exposure to Agent Orange. Four years later, Molly turned twenty-one and unexpectedly inherited a quarter of a million dollars from her mother’s estranged family’s estate. Through “retail therapy” and a long series of grossly irresponsible financial decisions, Molly found herself broke with over $36,000 in credit card debt less than two years later. Shame, guilt, and embarrassment set in.

Listen in as Molly shares her journey to faith as she worked her way out of debt and reveals how every messed up, broken story has a purpose. She now helps others through podcasting, speaking and her new book coming out in March, If I Don't Laugh, I'll Cry: How Death, Debt and Comedy Led to a Life of Faith, Farming and Forgetting What I Came into This Room For.

The empty nest years can feel like a season of losing our purpose, especially as a mom. When the kids leave home many of us are plunged into feelings of loss and grief, not knowing how to handle the extra time and conversations with our spouse. Ruthie Gray has been there and feels so passionately about ministering to women in this phase of life that she wrote a book, Empty Nest Awakening: Weaving the Threads of Your Passion into Purpose.

As a mother of four adult children, Ruthie has walked her own journey through the empty nest and has learned a lot about how we can grow and be filled with purpose once the kids leave home. She also addresses the pains of being in the sandwich generation as well as ideas on how to connect with your spouse when it's just the two of you again.

Ruthie is funny and practical and has a lot of great wisdom to share. You'll walk away from this conversation with a renewed perspective of the empty nest and be excited to forge ahead into the future God has for you.

Find shownotes at CarolRoper.org/Podcast

In this episode my guest, Amber Albee Swenson, shares practical tips that are really simple to incorporate into your relationship with your spouse, as well as warning signs that show you might be in dangerous territory with someone outside of your marriage. Amber has lots of great wisdom including this: "There's a woman out there who would be thrilled with your husband. So, stop being critical [of him]. Being critical is not a spiritual gift." That's a good word we need to frequently be reminded of.

One of the struggles that hit every family in some way is when you lose someone you love. Today's guest, Mike Nappa, lost his beloved wife, Amy, to cancer in 2016. In the years since her passing God has helped him to learn why grieving is such an important part of losing a loved one and how He's taught him how to grieve well. 

This is one of the most touching and informative interviews I've done. 

Mike has such a heart for those who are walking their own grief journey, and he truly wants to help those who are hurting as well as those who are trying to be there for them and understand their pain and what they need. He shares what one friend does for him every year on the anniversary of his wife's death (which, by the way is September 11) and why that has helped him to not only grieve that day well but also to look forward to it. Mike also talks about how his then three-year-old granddaughter struggled with her own grief and how one teacher recognized and helped her deal with her grief in the middle of a meltdown. He also gives wise advice to someone who is in the depth of despair in their grief journey.

Before I interviewed Mike, I asked my mom if she had any questions she'd like me to ask him since she's not quite three years out from losing my dad. He was genuinely happy to answer her question. Mike truly is one of the nicest guys I've ever had the pleasure of talking to and I know our conversation will be a blessing to you.

For more information and resources go to CarolRoper.org/podcast

Mike's book, Reflections for the Grieving Soul: Meditations and Scripture for Finding Hope After Loss

Does this sound familiar? You've been told to simply trust that the school system has your child's mental well-being covered. But what happens when that trust results in your child feeling overwhelmed, anxious, or lost in the education system? The pain of watching your child struggle while being told to just wait it out can be unbearable. It's time to take action and discover effective strategies to support your child's mental health in the school system, so they can thrive academically and emotionally.

In this episode my guest, Katie J. Trent, shares why she is a passionate advocate for children's mental health in the school system. With a background in counseling and ministry, Katie brings a wealth of experience and insight to the challenges children face today. Having worked as an elementary school counselor, she witnessed firsthand the impact of the highly politicized agenda on children's well-being. Katie is dedicated to empowering parents with the knowledge and tools to navigate these challenges and create a nurturing environment for their children's mental health. Her new book, "Recipes for a Sweet Child," offers creative and Bible-based activities that foster emotional well-being. With her expertise and genuine care for children, Katie is a trusted resource for parents seeking to support their child's mental health in the school system.

If you're feeling frustrated and discouraged because your efforts to serve others are not producing the desired result, then you are not alone! Perhaps you have been tirelessly volunteering your time, but still witnessing little impact. Maybe you have been pouring your heart into a cause, only to face constant setbacks and obstacles. Whatever the case may be, know that many others have experienced this same pain, and there is hope for a breakthrough in your journey of serving others.

Melissa Roberts is an incredible woman who has devoted her life to uplifting and nurturing others. As the founder and CEO of Rahab's Women and Children Home in Griffin, Georgia, Melissa exudes compassion and a deep desire to create a better world. She is a dedicated wife, a loving mother of six children, and a strong advocate for the importance of good family values. Through her determination and sheer will, Melissa has implemented a twelve-month program for homeless mothers, equipping them with essential life skills. Her uncompromised dedication to instilling biblical principles and creating solid foundations for these families is truly inspirational.

**Since we recorded this episode Melissa has encountered an issue. They were set up by a nonprofit CEO to lease a house from him and things were going well. Then he passed away and God told Melissa it was time to find another home. Little did she know that only weeks later the new CEO would be asking them to leave so she could live in the home. She believes it is a God mission for his family to come together and help relocate the five families that live in Rahab’s. When she learned they had to move, she told God what she wanted, and He's is doing it! 

They immediately contacted a realtor friend in the area and two weeks later, a property surfaced that he thought would be perfect for us, and it is. It's almost 5 acres, with two houses on the property that will house their families. But the houses need some work and Melissa is working on getting supplies and things donated and volunteer labor to get it ready.

So, they need financial help. Their move in cost is $4400 and, so they won’t have to deplete their account, they need to raise that amount plus moving cost and repairs in the home in order to make these homes into what they need for their Rahab families. If you feel led to give, would you please go to RahabsHouse.org to donate. You will be investing in women who are willing to work hard and want to create a better life for themselves and their families.**

Every individual, no matter their background or circumstances, deserves a life of abundance. We want to help shift their mindset and help them see themselves how God sees them, so they can create a sustainable lifestyle and bless the next generation. - Melissa Roberts

Go to carolroper.org for show notes

In a world where children's literature seemed innocent and free from controversy, Marcia Moston's journey took an unexpected turn. As she embarked on her role as a library board member, little did she know that she would stumble upon a hidden truth. The prevalence of gender identity ideology in those beloved books shook her to the core, shattering her perception of what was safe for children. But it was a chance encounter with a frail individual who had undergone a life-altering transition that deepened her longing for answers. And now, she realizes her quest is far from over.

Marcia is a dear friend with a vibrant personality who, beyond her teaching prowess and literary finesse, has delved into a realm not commonly her playing field. Fortified with years of experience as an English educator as well as a storyteller, Marcia has used her convincing wit to voice her concerns about the sweeping wave of gender identity ideologies affecting our youth. She has bravely accepted to navigate this controversial territory with the sole intent to help educate parents wading through the unsettling tide. Her empathetic nature coupled with an educator's understanding makes her a reliable compass on this voyage.

Kids want help and hope. We need to be there for them, navigating through the challenges and providing support. - Marcia Moston

Go to CarolRoper.org/podcast for show notes and more resources

In a world defined by the pursuit of greatness and recognition, one woman dared to challenge the norms. Kelly Needham's captivating journey unfolds, revealing an unexpected twist she didn't anticipate. As she grapples with her identity and insecurities amidst her husband's soaring success, an internal dialogue sparks, questioning the meaning of it all. She discovers how we as a society have been fooled into chasing meaning and purpose in all the wrong places, identifies the source of our hunger for the extraordinary and shows us the steps we can take today to build a purpose-filled reality without turning our lives upside-down.

Kelly Needham, an author and Bible teacher, is an inspiring personality who lives in the bustling city of Dallas, Texas. Kelly, a mother to five wonderful children, uses her experiences to motivate others to find true contentedness beyond societal expectations. Her book, 'Purposefooled', is a testament to her realizations and learnings about how a meaningful life is not defined by external recognition but by the individual's internal sense of fulfillment.

Go to CarolRoper.org/podcast for resources and free Puposefooled Going Deeper Guide

In the heartland of Tulsa, Oklahoma, Daniel Grothe grew up enveloped in the loving embrace of a pastor's home. Faith and community were his foundation, guiding him through life's ups and downs. But it was the unexpected twist that awaited him in Colorado Springs that would truly test his understanding of stability. Little did he know, the purchase of a piece of land would not only connect him to his childhood memories on his grandparents' ranch in Idaho, but it would also reveal a deeper purpose - one that would forever alter the course of his life. Daniel's narrative paints a vivid picture of connectedness, place, and stability. Taking cues from his grandparents, who lived in the same small town in Idaho for 86 years, he emphasizes the importance of belonging in a community and sustaining deep roots. He shares how location greatly impacts our sense of self-value and how living in a place for a long period allows us to forge deep relationships and develop a sense of community. This sense of belonging can tremendously enhance our self-value, reinforcing the idea that we are significant and valued members of our community. His perspectives are sure to challenge your thoughts and provide fresh insights.

We are living in a human experiment for the first time in human history... living as tourists instead of as members of a place we're passing through. - Daniel Grothe

Loneliness is worse for our health than smoking a pack of cigarettes a day. - Daniel Grothe

Brittany Roper is a woman of unyielding resilience and enduring faith who is an example of positivity amidst the many trying circumstances she's experienced. Her life journey, which includes triumph through fertility issues, the complex realities of raising special needs children, and the heartbreaking loss of a child, as well as her own battle with breast cancer, paints a raw and touching picture of both the adversities and joys of life. As a devoted mother, her incredible story is a testament to her unbroken spirit and steadfast faith, finding strength and gratitude amidst the chaos of everyday life.

If you're feeling overwhelmed by your suffering and finding no relief in your current efforts to overcome it, such as seeking professional help or relying solely on your own strength, then you are not alone!

In this episode, you will be able to:

• Discover how leading with integrity trumps emotional reactions when steering the leadership helm.
• Adopt faith and worship as essential tools for enduring during tough times, inspired by real-life stories.
• Learn from Joseph and Peter's epic undertakings as chief examples of overcoming life's adversities.
• Realize the liberating force of the spoken word of God and ponder on its relevance in day-to-day life.
• Immerse yourself in the joy of classic Christian literature and embrace outdoor activities as meditations on God's creation.

My special guest is Carol McLeod

Step into the sphere of faith with Carol McLeod, a woman whose sole purpose lies in communicating the timeless truths of Scripture. As a mother, a grandmother, and a woman of faith, Carol has spent years finding strength and peace in the teachings of the Bible. Her drive to kindle a ray of hope in the hearts of the disheartened led her to write inspiring Bible studies. Sharing from her own experiences of pain and loss, Carol offers a powerful testimony that even on life's darkest days, God's love and faithfulness shine through.

The resources mentioned in this episode are:

• Join Carol McLeod's Bible study: Timeless based on the book of First Peter.
• Visit Carol McLeod's website at Carolmcleodministries.com for more information on her books, podcasts, TV show, and blog.
• Email Carol at Carol@Carolmcleodministries.com to join the private prayer group Warrior Moms for mothers with prodigal children or those who have been cut off by their grown children.
• Purchase Carol McLeod's book, Meanwhile, which focuses on the life of Joseph and offers insights on living well in the midst of devastation.
• Explore the concept of finding purpose in pain and how God can use evil for good by reading Genesis 50:20 and reflecting on Joseph's story.
• Consider attending Carol Roper's retreat at The Cove, Operation Restoration, which draws inspiration from the restoration of Joseph and his family.
• Reflect on the hope and strength found in the Bible and seek comfort in knowing that God is with you in your deepest moments of pain.
• Pray for your children, especially if they have strayed from their faith, using fighting scriptures such as John's promise that God hears

If you or someone you know and love has a special needs child or adult in their life then you are going to love hearing Lynn Blackburn's story about her sweet daughter, Emma. Emma was diagnosed with Rubinstein-Taybi Syndrome when she was a baby and Lynn says that having a child with a disability rocked her world, but God was both patient and faithful as she and her husband, Brian, wrestled with their new reality. Being Emma's mom has changed her in ways she never could have imagined. On this episode Lynn shares the joys and challenges of raising a child with special needs into adulthood. Emma is now 20 years old, and Lynn tells what the next chapter of life will look like for her and their family. She also shares practical takeaways and some guilt-free advice for taking care of special needs children to adulthood and beyond.

Lynn is the author of ten Christian romantic suspense books, homeschools her boys and loves sharing stories of her family life to encourage other parents navigating their own family challenges.

Today's guest is the author of one of my most favorite books, An Intentional Life: A Life-Giving Invitation to Uncover Your Passions and Unlock Your Purpose. I was so excited when Kara Stott quickly agreed to be on the podcast, and we became fast friends. She's passionate about connecting women and helping them grow in their relationship with the Lord, to understand their calling and to step out into the things God has asked them to do. But after working so hard building up her Pursuit Ministry, at what looked like the pinnacle of her success, God called her to lay it all down. Through that act of obedience, she began to understand what the really important things in life are. This book talks about her journey to live an intentional life that honors God, your family, your church, community and yourself. 

One of my favorite observations she talks about in this episode is when she says, "If Jesus spent 30 years in family and three years in ministry... we have this all backward." That was an eye-opening statement for me. Kara also shares her heart for the family table, her husband's struggle with PTSD and one of the fun things she and her husband do to keep their marriage fresh and focused on each other. We cover so much good stuff in this episode I know you'll walk away with lots of new ways to live an intentional life.

Erica Wiggenhorn used to be afraid to read her Bible. When she first became a Christian, she was told by her youth leader she needed to read her Bible in order to grow closer to Jesus. But whenever she tried reading it, she felt like she was reading a foreign language. So she avoided her Bible and Bible studies for years, until a friend drug her to a study. And it changed her life. Once she began realizing how powerful God's word is her appetite for Bible reading grew exponentially. So much so that she began teaching Bible studies and how now written numerous studies, including her most recent one Unexpected Revival: Experiencing God's Goodness Through Disappointment and Doubt, a study through the book of Ezekial. Erica says, "There is power in [the Bible]. There is power in this word. It is alive. It is active. And it does something in us when we open it." 

Erica's heart for Jesus and others shines bright in our conversation.

Show notes: Carolroper.org/podcast

Erica's website Ericawiggenhorn.com

Cynthia Tobias has been on my bucket list since before I started this podcast because of the work she's done teaching about the strong-willed child. Her book, You Can't Make Me: But I Can Be Persuaded, was a key influence in helping me raise my strong-willed daughter, Elise. Before I knew how to handle her stubborn temperament, I would frequently end up frustrated and in a puddle of tears. But once I learned some of the tools and tips Cynthia shares, it became easier for me to understand how to get Elise to cooperate more (hint: it doesn't involve getting angry or raising your voice).

In this episode Cynthia shares, Three Quick Ways to Recognize and deal with Your Strong-Willed Child, Teen or Adult, as well as the magic word you can use that almost always works to get a strong-willed person to cooperate and where you can find immediate free resources like The Strong-Willed Child Emergency Kit. I know you'll be so encouraged with Cynthia's solid advice on helping guide your strong-willed child. As she states in this episode," It's a compliment that God gave us to have a strong-willed child... When they're born, they don't have any idea how to use it. It's up to us to help guide it, shape it, and form it and let God use it." You're going to want to thank Cynthia after hearing this episode.

Heather Millsaps and Leslie Hawkins are two of the co-founders of New Day Recovery in Fountain Inn, S.C. Both ladies and their husbands have incredible testimonies of how God delivered their husbands from drug and alcohol addiction and saved their marriages. Leslie's husband, Stephen, has epilepsy and suffered a seizure that resulted in him having brain surgery that exacerbated his existing drug and alcohol addiction. Heather's husband, Glenn, had a shoulder injury that resulted in him becoming dependent on painkillers. Both of these families walked a difficult road to recovery and, after the healing came, Leslie had a recurring dream about helping people recover from addiction. After having the dream several times, she finally shared it with her husband, who shared it with one of their church pastors, who in turn encouraged them to start a ministry. Heather, who wasn't aware of Leslie's dreams, responded in an act of obedience from a Sunday morning message saying she felt she needed to help people seeking recovery. Once these ladies and their husbands, along with two other couples, Nick and Wimberly Cox and John and Megan Phillips, got together they created New Day Recovery with the help of Capstone Church. Megan, by the way, was on episode #73 and Laura Barrineau, who is also mentioned in this episode, was my guest in episode #72. I hope you'll listen to their stories as well.

You're going to love Leslie and Heather and their hearts for helping individuals and families in their recovery journey. When you're going through something hard, it's such a comfort to have someone come alongside you and say, "I understand, I've been there too. I can help." That's what this group is doing. If you or someone you love struggles with addiction, I pray this episode will give you practical ways to find hope and healing.