From Mourning to Morning

I live in Colorado Springs, not in Florida or the Carolinas. We don't get hurricanes here. But the issue I will deal with, using some wisdom from my friend and colleague Rabbi Jack Riemer, who lives right in the middle of where Hurricane Matthew landed, are many: How could this have happened so quickly and so cruelly? How could our lives have changed from lightness to darkness without sufficient warning? And, what do we do now? I will talk about the role of religion-in this case Judaism, but all religions are included-and how religion has the wisdom to see us through these losses and help us heal and move forward. There were life-losses and there was trauma. Now the hurricane has gone away, but its effects still linger. Come listen this Thursday at 5PM PST. To my Jewish listeners, Happy New Year. And to all, I pray for a year of peace in this world created by God.

Isabel Stenzel and her twin sister Anabel, were both born with cystic fibrosis. They taught about what that meant and how to live with it. They wrote a book about it. Then Anabel died. Isabel re-doubled her efforts to speak and teach about living and coping with this awful illness. She continues to move forward, helping others to bring a mindset of healing from the effects of cystic fibrosis. She will be our teacher, and I invite you to come and learn from her.

Last week we spoke to a mediator, who taught us that ending a marriage was difficult and sad, but could lead to healing. This week, two views on divorce: How I Learned to Love my Breakup, and The Five Lessons To Learn from Divorce. We will hear two similar and different ways to approach ending a marriage, and there will be lots to think about. Hope you can join me, this TH 5-6 PST.

In many states in our country, before a divorce is finalized, the couple must go to mediation. Most folks think that mediation is cut-and-dry, simply another waste of time. But that is not true. My friend Beth Lieberman has been a social worker-mediator for many years, and has seen much healing with her work with divorcing couples. Often they will leave her office with much less venom and anger than before. Yes, they still divorce, but they are no longer enemies. Come listen as Beth teaches us about healing. Thursday night at 5PM PST. From Mourning to Morning-you can do it! Rabbi Mel Author, A GPS FOR GRIEF AND HEALING Google 'GPS FOR GRIEF,' and Kindle will magically take you there.

I am Rabbi Mel Glazer, and this is my first show. I am delighted to be your host. I will introduce myself and you will get to know me a bit better. Then I will begin to teach what I know about grief and healing. I will ask and answer the questions: what is grief all about? What is the goal of mourning? My answer may surprise you, because it has little to do with the one who died. It has to do only with you! I will tell a Zen story and you will immediately understand how I hope you might begin to think about grief. Lots of different losses in our lives. Death, divorce, pet loss, loss of a relationship, weddings (yes, I mean that!) and many more. We have lots of work to do, I look forward to speaking and teaching and learning together. Finally, I am a Rabbi, but that has nothing to do with grief. Grief has no religion, it is an orphan that affects believers and non-believers alike. Tell your friends that The Grief Rabbi is coming, invite them to join you.

Kashi Labh Mukti Bhawan in Varanasi is one of the three guesthouses in the city where people check in to die. he has been present for 12000 deaths, and he has learned life-lessons from each one. I will read his article by Deepak Ramola -with my comments, of course!- and we will marvel together at this Hindu wisdom. Please join me. Thursday evening 5PM PST, on VoiceAmerica.com.

With the help of a book I purchased last year, called I Will Die: A Creative Journal for Mortals -Jessica Featherly-, consisting solely of questions and feelings related to death, I will share some personal feelings and thoughts on death in general, my own death in particular. I can't wait to hear what I will have to say... Please join me! Rabbi Mel 'From Mourning to Morning'

I don't remember who said it, but there is a comedian who once said: 'I'm not afraid of being dead, I am afraid of dying.' And it's the truth, isn't it.... But there is help on the way, in the form of -mostly- women who call themselves 'a doula.' They are like a midwife to the dying and to their families. They do not take the place of hospice nurses, rather, they take care of those who are dying. They help the dying navigate the journey from this world to the next, they comfort the dying and they assis the family in whatever will be helpful. My guest this week is Shelby Kirillin, a doula who lives in Richmond, VA, and who was the recent subject of an interview in the Richmond Magaz. She will enlighten us, comfort us and strengthen us, so that the dying experience need not be so scary. Shelby even laughs with the dying and their families, and you will learn why when you join us this Thursday night. I look forward to your being with Shelby and me on 'From Mourning to Morning.' Rabbi G

So you go into the back room at Panera's and you sit down with other people who have suffered a life-loss. And then you talk to each other over tea and cookies about death. Not dying, but death. Sounds weird, no? But Death Cafes are happening all over America, and my guest Lizzie Miles hosted the very first one in America in 2012. She is a multi-interest woman, the author of Somewhere In Between: The Hokey Pokey, Chocolate Cake and The Shared Death Experience, and lots of blogs about death. I just read her blog called: Does Jesus like chocolate? Not only is it poignant. It is truth in poetry, and I am delighted to have her as my guest. Got a question during the show? 888 346-9141 E-mail me at rabbimel@griefok.com Bring your friends!

We have been talking a lot about death, and this week we will get the view from the hospice nurse herself. Emma is caring and compassionate, you will learn much from her.

Yes, when they die, we grieve them. But we're not done grieving. At the next birthday arty or anniversary or Christmas dinner or Passover seder, we grieve the empty chair, and we grieve all over again. In fact, we will grieve their looses forever. Let's talk about it this Thursday. 5PM PST From Mourning to Morning

So, does anybody in your family know your wishes for when you die? Or before you die? Do you want the doctors to keep on trying to save your life no matter how many tubes they stick into your body? Or is there a point where you will have had enough, and want to just have everyone leave you alone and let you die? Burial or cremation, which do you prefer? Do you have life insurance? Pension? Valuables? Does your family know the bills are? And how you pay them? What about inheritance-who gets what piece of art? You have to have the conversation when you are of sound mind mind, who knows when the time will come? My guest, Harriet Warshaw, is Exec. Director of The Conversation Project. She and I will begin to sort these things out, so you will be able to have the conversation while you're still around. Listen in, and invite your family and friends. TH July 21, 2016 ,at 5PM PST. Call in? 888 346-9141 Blessings, Rabbi Mel

Most of us are afraid of death: we don't want to talk about it or hear about it. And especially, we do not ever want to touch a dead body and prepare it for burial. Death scares us and makes it more difficult to prepare for own death, as well as the deaths of our loved ones. My guest is an up-and-coming funeral director, Caitlin Doughty. She is blazing new trails in the area of dealing compassionately with death and burial. She is at the beginning of change and transformation, and she and I will discuss these issues. Read about her and you will be as impressed as I am. I look forward to Thursday night. Please listen to us speak about not feeling so afraid to deal with death. You will feel better after Caitlin and I chat.

Okay, my friends, this week we are going to talk about suicide. Married family, having problems, he is a drug addict. He OD's, either on purpose or accidentally, and dies. On his living room couch. The body was found by the children. Can you imagine the pain and crying and grief that affected the family? Of course you can. But...now here's the secret. His wife, still legally married to him, is angry as hell that he did what he did. Now she has the two kids (6 and 4) all to herself. Money is a problem, and she doesn't know where to turn. Yes, she is extremely angry at him. Of course, it's hard to say that to anyone beside your clergy. We have talked plenty about it. And...she is also now free! She can be whomever she wants, she can stay in town, she can move. Her options are unlimited. Angry. Free. What would you do? Write me and tell me---rabbimel@griefok.com. Or call me on the show--888 346-9141. Look forward to being together Thursday night, 5PM PST. From Mourning to Morning.

So Papa dies, the funeral home comes and picks him up from the hospital/hospice, and you don't see him again until (maybe) right before the funeral. Or, you pay a cosmetologist to make him up so he looks like he's not....dead, and his coffin is open for you to stare at. How does this process, in which you take no part, help you to grieve his death? Well, maybe there's a better way: maybe you bring Papa home, and you prepare his body yourselves (yes, you can wash his body at home), then he stays with you until the funeral. Which you take care of, not the funeral home! I know, it's different and more than a little scary. But being with Papa from death to funeral means you can sit with him and talk to him and forgive him and apologize to him. At 2AM, if that's what you want to do. Our guest, Lauren Carroll, is a Home Funeral Educator in Colorado Springs, and she will explain all this to us. She is compassionate, loving and caring, and she will give us lots to think about.

So far, we have been talking about the loss of a loved-one. But what about the loss of a less-than-loved-one? Someone who used to share our lives, our kids, our friends? Divorce can be an awful experience. It can shatter lives. And life is now different-where do the kids sleep during the week and who gets them over the weekend? Who cooks the meals, who arranges playdates? Who goes to school conferences? And the parents, once joined together by love, now what? Their friends now have to make choices-I'll be his friend, not hers. She doesn't get invited to social events anymore, because her girlfriends don't want their own husbands to look too hard at the divorcee? Can the formerly married retain a civil relationship with each other, or are they nasty and vindictive? Can you be friends with your former wife/husband? This is a great time for you to call in and talk about your own experience. Others will learn from you. Question: how do you make divorce work? Call me-888 346-9141.

Well, we know that we think differently, but do we grieve differently? I don't know either, but my guest Shawn Doyle, does. He has written about it and spoken about it, and I can't wait to hear what he has to say. This matters a lot. Because, if I know that if a woman has suffered a life-loss, I can better understand what she needs in the way of healing and consolation. The same with a man. So come and listen and learn with me. br I look forward to your being with me this Thursday at 5PM PST on From Mourning to Morning.

I am Rabbi Mel Glazer, and this is my first show. I am delighted to be your host. I will introduce myself and you will get to know me a bit better. Then I will begin to teach what I know about grief and healing. I will ask and answer the questions: what is grief all about? What is the goal of mourning? My answer may surprise you, because it has little to do with the one who died. It has to do only with you! I will tell a Zen story and you will immediately understand how I hope you might begin to think about grief. Lots of different losses in our lives. Death, divorce, pet loss, loss of a relationship, weddings (yes, I mean that!) and many more. We have lots of work to do, I look forward to speaking and teaching and learning together. Finally, I am a Rabbi, but that has nothing to do with grief. Grief has no religion, it is an orphan that affects believers and non-believers alike. Tell your friends that The Grief Rabbi is coming, invite them to join you.

When a loved one die, we cry, we get lonely, we are afraid to move forward. br What about when a pet dies, what happens then? Come and learn with Judy Wright, known as Auntie Artichoke. You'll find out why she calls herself that, and what an artichoke has to do with the death of a pet. br Come and listen and invite your friends. br Till Thursday...

Until I met my guest, Rev. Dr. Ahriana Platten nine years ago, I had no idea what Unity was all about. We have been close friends ever since, and I invited her to explain their unique theology to us. br How does Unity deal with death? What happens to the soul? The body? Is there an afterlife? Death rituals? What happens at funerals? What does mourning look like? br We Jews and Christians are mostly familiar with each others' customs, since we have been present at funerals and other ceremonies. On this episode, we will learn a different way of being spiritual. br Come listen to Ahriana teach us, she is delightful and kind and empathic and funny. You will learn much! br Blessings, Rabbi Mel