Heal from Infidelity

While we all want to be in relationships that are trusting and loving, at the root of it all what we really want is to feel deeply chosen.

In this episode, I’ll share different examples (both personal and from clients) where the strong desire to know you are being chosen drives forward courageous action.

I will also share how in order to feel deeply chosen, we have to strongly desire ourselves first. This pushes our growth as we develop into people who know what we what, and will hold a high standard to make sure we have those things.

Don’t miss this one! There is something for everyone.

Register for my free class, “How to Get Your Life Back After Infidelity” here: https://andrea-giles.mykajabi.com/webinar-mar13-confirmed

To work with me, go to: https://andreagiles.com/get-your-life-back/

Follow me on Instagram at: https://www.instagram.com/theinfidelitycoach/

To learn more from me, be sure to join my email list at: https://andreagiles.com/lies-about-infidelity/

Please click the button to subscribe so you don't miss any episodes and leave a review if your favorite podcast app has that ability. Thank you!

For transcripts and other available downloads, please visit my website at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/

© 2020 - 2024 Andrea Giles

After having conversations with hundreds of people from all over the world in my five years of being an infidelity coach, there are some patterns, trends and truths I have learned.

In this episode, I share those 5 truths and how they have changed some of my views around infidelity. This is one you do not want to miss as it may change some of your views, too.

To work with me, go to: https://andreagiles.com/get-your-life-back/

Follow me on Instagram at: https://www.instagram.com/theinfidelitycoach/

To learn more from me, be sure to join my email list at: https://andreagiles.com/lies-about-infidelity/

Please click the button to subscribe so you don't miss any episodes and leave a review if your favorite podcast app has that ability. Thank you!

For transcripts and other available downloads, please visit my website at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/

© 2020 - 2024 Andrea Giles

In a world that celebrates independence, it can seem like “weakness” to build relationships that require vulnerability. With “cancel culture” being rampant, it goes against the messages of the day, especially after infidelity, to fully lean in to building something that will last the test of time.

In this episode I go over two common ways we relate with each other in relationships, and one that is less practiced but will get you far more traction.

You will be able to identity where you are in your own relationship, and hear some tips on things that will push you in a healthy way.

To learn more from me, be sure to join my email list at: https://andreagiles.com/lies-about-infidelity/

To learn more about working with me, go to: https://andreagiles.com/get-your-life-back/

Follow me on Instagram at: https://www.instagram.com/theinfidelitycoach/

Please click the button to subscribe so you don't miss any episodes and leave a review if your favorite podcast app has that ability. Thank you!

For transcripts and other available downloads, please visit my website at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/

© 2020 - 2024 Andrea Giles

In the 2nd of this 2 part series, Sara Fisk and Andrea go deeper into people-pleasing.

They go into more detail about how people-pleasing tendencies can put relationships at risk, and how stopping people-pleasing can help relationships heal.

You will learn:

• How we are all deeply wired to people-please
• How it is likely affecting you post-infidelity to people-please
• How taking responsibility for our own growth (and letting go of people-pleasing) is crucial to healing

Sara Bybee Fisk is a Master Certified Coach and Instructor who teaches women how to tame the rampant people-pleasing, perfectionism and codependency that is causing them so much frustration and resentment. She is an anxious optimist and born again feminist who listens to more books than she actually sits down to read. She loves a good hike, good dark chocolate and good conversations. Her big dreams include learning to sail and to sing and dance like JLo and helping thousands of women create the big, juicy lives they want to be living. She is a wife and mom of 5 and she enjoys those roles most of the time.

To learn more from Andrea, be sure to join her email list at: https://andreagiles.com/lies-about-infidelity/

To learn more about working with Andrea, go to: https://andreagiles.com/get-your-life-back/

Follow Andrea on Instagram at: https://www.instagram.com/theinfidelitycoach/

Please click the button to subscribe so you don't miss any episodes and leave a review if your favorite podcast app has that ability. Thank you!

For transcripts and other available downloads, please visit my website at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/

© 2020 - 2024 Andrea Giles

Do you struggle with people-pleasing? Is it getting in the way of making clear decisions for yourself in the after-math of infidelity?

In this 2-part series, Andrea and Sara Fisk talk all things people-pleasing. You will learn:

• How we are all deeply wired to people-please
• How it is likely affecting you post-infidelity to people-please
• How taking responsibility for our own growth (and letting go of people-pleasing) is crucial to healing

Sara Bybee Fisk is a Master Certified Coach and Instructor who teaches women how to tame the rampant people-pleasing, perfectionism and codependency that is causing them so much frustration and resentment. She is an anxious optimist and born again feminist who listens to more books than she actually sits down to read. She loves a good hike, good dark chocolate and good conversations. Her big dreams include learning to sail and to sing and dance like JLo and helping thousands of women create the big, juicy lives they want to be living. She is a wife and mom of 5 and she enjoys those roles most of the time.

To learn more from Andrea, be sure to join her email list at: https://andreagiles.com/lies-about-infidelity/

To learn more about working with Andrea, go to: https://andreagiles.com/get-your-life-back/

Follow Andrea on Instagram at: https://www.instagram.com/theinfidelitycoach/

Please click the button to subscribe so you don't miss any episodes and leave a review if your favorite podcast app has that ability. Thank you!

For transcripts and other available downloads, please visit my website at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/

© 2020 - 2024 Andrea Giles

In this episode, I interview a former client, Lauren. Be prepared for an episode you will go back to again and again as there were so many gems and truths in her words.

Lauren not only shares in depth her personal story with her spouse's infidelity, but she shares her journey of coming back to herself after years of feeling like she wasn’t enough.

I guarantee you will relate to many of the things she shares, and feel inspired by how she has taken charge of her own life to make it something beautiful.

To learn more from me, be sure to join email list at: https://andreagiles.com/lies-about-infidelity/

To learn more about working with me, go to: https://andreagiles.com/get-your-life-back/

Follow me on Instagram at: https://www.instagram.com/theinfidelitycoach/

Please click the button to subscribe so you don't miss any episodes and leave a review if your favorite podcast app has that ability. Thank you!

For transcripts and other available downloads, please visit my website at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/

© 2020 - 2023 Andrea Giles

How do you define healing?

If you think it means never hurting again, you can be setting yourself up for even more pain in the future.

In this episode, I cover various ways we can sabotage our own healing, and clearly define what it actually means.

You will also learn how to evaluate how far you have come, and what to be focusing on next.

When we learn to change our expectations, everything feels less urgent, there is less pressure, and we grow our capacity to hold space for ourselves.

To learn more from me, be sure to join email list at: https://andreagiles.com/lies-about-infidelity/

To learn more about working with me, go to: https://andreagiles.com/get-your-life-back/

Follow me on Instagram at: https://www.instagram.com/theinfidelitycoach/

Please click the button to subscribe so you don't miss any episodes and leave a review if your favorite podcast app has that ability. Thank you!

For transcripts and other available downloads, please visit my website at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/

© 2020 - 2023 Andrea Giles

After infidelity, it is easy to fall into the trap of trying to take control of the healing and recovery of your partner.

In this episode, you will learn why this is not a healthy, long-term solution and what to try instead.

We will cover:

• Differences between men and women and why our healing looks different
• Why learning to create more internal safety will get you the best results
• Why trying to control our spouse often back-fires

If you want help navigating the aftermath of infidelity, don’t miss this one!

To learn more from me, be sure to join email list at: https://andreagiles.com/lies-about-infidelity/

To learn more about working with me, go to: https://andreagiles.com/get-your-life-back/

Follow me on Instagram at: https://www.instagram.com/theinfidelitycoach/

Please click the button to subscribe so you don't miss any episodes and leave a review if your favorite podcast app has that ability. Thank you!

For transcripts and other available downloads, please visit my website at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/

© 2020 - 2023 Andrea Giles

Sometimes we can use popular opinion against ourselves. We can listen to the opinions of others, rather than deeply searching our own hearts for what is true.

In this episode, I use a powerful analogy to teach you how to do your own “investigating” into what is true, beyond what outside sources may tell you.

You will learn how to see the full scope of your situation, rather than focusing only on the things that feel the biggest or scariest.

When we learn to get a broader view, we make more informed decisions that become easier to back up over time.

To learn more from me, be sure to join email list at: https://andreagiles.com/lies-about-infidelity/

To learn more about working with me, go to: https://andreagiles.com/get-your-life-back/

Follow me on Instagram at: https://www.instagram.com/theinfidelitycoach/

Please click the button to subscribe so you don't miss any episodes and leave a review if your favorite podcast app has that ability. Thank you!

For transcripts and other available downloads, please visit my website at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/

© 2020 - 2023 Andrea Giles

Romantic infidelity and financial infidelity often go hand in hand. Money is frequently spent on the affair partner, and in high-control relationships, spouses can feel like they have no say about where the money goes.

In this episode, guest Tracy Coenen and I discuss:

• Hidden money
• Financial rights for stay-at-home moms
• Divorce settlements
• Financial options, even if you are staying married

Tracy has been investigating fraud for more than 25 years, but she didn’t always want to be a forensic accountant. With a dream of one day being a prison warden, Tracy went to Marquette University in Milwaukee, WI to get a criminology degree. A class on financial crime investigations reminded her how much she loved Encyclopedia Brown books as a kid. She continued her criminology degree but added accounting and economics courses so she could become a CPA ... and here Tracy is, finding money in cases of corporate fraud, high net worth divorce, and other financial shenanigans.

Learn more from Tracy at: https://www.fraudcoach.com/infidelity

To learn more from me, be sure to join email list at: https://andreagiles.com/lies-about-infidelity/

Infidelity is one of the few things that can change everything, forever. There is no going back.

How we deal with the “after” in infidelity is crucial. It presents an opportunity to change old patterns, learn new ways of being, and new ways to interact with one another.

In this episode, you’ll learn how changing up the old patterns will serve you, whether you stay with your current spouse or not. You’ll understand why the only way forward is if both partners commit to being vulnerable, clumsy and to putting their best foot forward.

Register for the free class, “How to Get Your Life Back After Infidelity.”

To learn more from me, be sure to join email list at: https://andreagiles.com/lies-about-infidelity/

Please click the button to subscribe so you don't miss any episodes and leave a review if your favorite podcast app has that ability. Thank you!

For transcripts and other available downloads, please visit my website at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/

© 2020 - 2023 Andrea Giles

Do you often feel like you “should” try to stay after infidelity? Or maybe you feel pressure from others telling you to leave because, as the saying goes, “Once a cheater, always a cheater?”

In this episode, I shine a light on how to listen for what is actually true for you. Other well-meaning people will always have their opinions, but in the end, you are the one that has to live in your life.

Desire is a strong indicator of the direction your wisest self wants to go. When you learn to listen to it, it will become your compass, and all you need is just a spark of a desire for it to get you moving.

This desire can cut through the noise of your own mind, others’ opinions, and your intense emotions.

Make sure to tune in to better understand the power of desire and how it can get you moving forward.

Schedule a free call to join my new group, “Get Your Life Back After Infidelity.”

To learn more from me, be sure to join email list at: https://andreagiles.com/lies-about-infidelity/

Please click the button to subscribe so you don't miss any episodes and leave a review if your favorite podcast app has that ability. Thank you!

For transcripts and other available downloads, please visit my website at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/

© 2020 - 2023 Andrea Giles

In this follow up to my last episode, “Intrusive Thoughts,” I go into more depth as to how to navigate the thoughts that seem to take over and rob you of your peace.

I share two points that will help you gain some traction and direction the next time an intrusive thought shows up.

Point one is about how intrusive thoughts can keep us stuck in the past rather than seeing what is in front of us. I also talk about how sometimes staying in this space can keep us from our own growth and development.

Point two is about allowing the thoughts that come up to show us what we need to do to close “open loops” in our mind. This part is about leaning into the things we need to be looking at to set down the thoughts that keep showing up.

Don’t miss this episode, as you will leave with even more direction and actionable steps to take that will help you quiet your mind and move forward.

Schedule a free call to join my new group, “Get Your Life Back After Infidelity.”

To learn more from me, be sure to join email list at: https://andreagiles.com/lies-about-infidelity/

Please click the button to subscribe so you don't miss any episodes and leave a review if your favorite podcast app has that ability. Thank you!

For transcripts and other available downloads, please visit my website at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/

© 2020 - 2023 Andrea Giles

Do you struggle with intrusive thoughts? These are the ones that pop up, seemingly out of nowhere, and can derail your whole day.

In this episode, I cover where these thoughts come from, and how to process them so they no longer have a hold on you.

You will learn a strategy that will:

1. Help you bring more awareness to the thought 
2. Give you direction as to what to do with it (so you are in charge of the thought rather than it being in charge of you). 

If you are like every client I have ever worked with, you have unwanted thoughts, and are tired of the hold they have on you. Don’t miss this episode to learn how to get a hold on the thoughts that can disturb your peace.

Want to work with me? Schedule a free call to join my new group, “Get Your Life Back After Infidelity.”

To learn more from me, be sure to join email list at: https://andreagiles.com/lies-about-infidelity/

Please click the button to subscribe so you don't miss any episodes and leave a review if your favorite podcast app has that ability. Thank you!

For transcripts and other available downloads, please visit my website at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/

© 2020 - 2023 Andrea Giles

What happens when something you believed as true is challenged? Or when you make up your mind about something and immediately doubt it? Does it mean you made the wrong decision, or is something else happening?

In this episode, you’ll learn all about cognitive dissonance and how it is an indication that something is out of alignment for you. It may be that your beliefs need to be reevaluated or expanded. It may be that you are being led into deeper self-trust and wisdom.

While cognitive dissonance can be quite uncomfortable, it can lead you into a place of deep peace, knowing that your internal values match your external actions.

How to work with me: https://calendly.com/andreagilescoaching/get-your-life-back

To learn more from me, be sure to join email list at: https://andreagiles.com/lies-about-infidelity/

Please click the button to subscribe so you don't miss any episodes and leave a review if your favorite podcast app has that ability. Thank you!

For transcripts and other available downloads, please visit my website at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/

© 2020 - 2023 Andrea Giles

After infidelity, the decision needs to be made whether to stay or go. But for most people, that is only half the decision.

Many people go through life being physically in a relationship but emotionally out. Some leave marriages physically but cannot separate themselves emotionally from their spouse, so they don’t really move on.

In this episode, I help you identify exactly where you are in your process forward. I help you know how to more fully commit to getting where you want to go so you can have real peace.

This is deep emotional work, and this episode can help you understand not only why it has been so difficult to go all in, but how you can help yourself get there.

Join me for my free webinar, HOW TO GET YOUR LIFE BACK AFTER INFIDELITY, on August 26th at 2 pm MST. You can register here.

To learn more from me, be sure to join email list at: https://andreagiles.com/lies-about-infidelity/

Please click the button to subscribe so you don't miss any episodes and leave a review if your favorite podcast app has that ability. Thank you!

For transcripts and other available downloads, please visit my website at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/

© 2020 - 2023 Andrea Giles

When you think of yourself, do you identify more with being someone who has been traumatized, or as someone who is incredibly resilient, despite your trauma?

Humans all experience trauma. It is inescapable. But what we forget is that as humans we are built to be resilient, and to rise above our trauma- not get stuck in it.

In this episode, you’ll learn how to create more resiliency as you navigate the choppy waters of infidelity. You will understand how you are getting yourself stuck in the story of your trauma, and leave with a clear path of how to grow stronger, despite your challenges.

Interested in my coaching program? Schedule a free 1-1 call with me below to see if it would be a good fit for you.

https://calendly.com/andreagilescoaching/know-in-90

To learn more from me, be sure to join email list at: https://andreagiles.com/lies-about-infidelity/

Please click the button to subscribe so you don't miss any episodes and leave a review if your favorite podcast app has that ability. Thank you!

For transcripts and other available downloads, please visit my website at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/

© 2020 - 2023 Andrea Giles

Most of us understand the importance and significance of courage. It is an emotion that can help us to look at hard things in our lives. But if we are unwilling to take action based on our feeling of courage, we end up right where we started.

In this episode, I share some ideas pertaining to infidelity about some of the ways we need to not only have courage, but to turn that courage into action to ultimately have what we want.

I use specific stories and analogies to help my listeners know how this applies to them, and things they can start doing today.

Ways to work with me:

Want to know how to decide to stay or go after infidelity? Join my free class here.

Interested in my coaching program? Schedule a free 1-1 call with me below to see if it would be a good fit for you. https://andreagiles.com/know-in-90/

To learn more from me, be sure to join my email list at: https://andreagiles.com/lies-about-infidelity/

Please click the button to subscribe so you don't miss any episodes and leave a review if your favorite podcast app has that ability. Thank you!

For transcripts and other available downloads, please visit my website at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/

© 2020 - 2023 Andrea Giles

How much pressure do you put on yourself to “Keep the Peace”? Maybe there are things you don’t say because you don’t want to create conflict. Maybe you just stuff things down rather than speak up and make others uncomfortable.

In this episode, I discuss the concept of keeping the peace and where it often backfires. What if there is something better than keeping the peace? What if protecting your own peace over others' is the best work you can do?

If you want to understand areas you are hiding to maintain peace, listen to this episode. You will grow in your courage and strength to stand up for what you want most, even if it means temporarily rocking the boat in the name of creating long-term peace.

Ways to work with me:

Want to know how to decide to stay or go after infidelity? Join my free class here.

Interested in my coaching program? Schedule a free 1-1 call with me to see if it would be a good fit for you. https://andreagiles.com/know-in-90/

To learn more from me, be sure to join my email list at: https://andreagiles.com/lies-about-infidelity/

Please click the button to subscribe so you don't miss any episodes and leave a review if your favorite podcast app has that ability. Thank you!

For transcripts and other available downloads, please visit my website at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/

© 2020 - 2023 Andrea Giles

In the aftermath of infidelity, it can feel like your life has been blown up, and our spouse sometimes does not seem to understand how much their choices impacted us.

This episode discusses the importance of knowing that our spouse “gets it” in order to really move forward and build trust. I also discuss growing our capacity to look at ourselves and how the things we say and do affect others.

Solid relationships are built on both people taking responsibility for how we each impact each other.

Want to work with me? Apply to join my group coaching program at:   https://andreagiles.com/know-in-90/

To learn more from me, be sure to join my email list at: https://andreagiles.com/lies-about-infidelity/

Please click the button to subscribe so you don't miss any episodes and leave a review if your favorite podcast app has that ability. Thank you!

For transcripts and other available downloads, please visit my website at https://andreagiles.com/podcast/

© 2020 - 2023 Andrea Giles