Hollywood Week

Ladies & Gentlemen...

DUNE: PART 2
THE REVIEW
that is all

"POWER OVER SPICE IS POWER OVER ALL"

Ladies & Gentlemen, many of you doubted this day would come…many of you doubted that we had the sheer WILL POWER and DETERMINATION to record this ~3 hour~year end~spectacular…but many of you were wrong

This is it! Despite the delay, it’s time to reflect on 2023 and not only count down our TOP TEN FILMS of the year, but also hand out the often imitated but never duplicated HOLLYWOOD WEEK AWARDS!

Along with falling off of my roof while hanging Christmas lights and saying politically incorrect things at Thanksgiving, this is my favorite annual tradition.

CELEBRATE GOOD TIMES! COME ON!

"Alright stop...ANTICIPATE AND LISTEN"
--Vanilla Ice, 1990

That's right ladies and gentlemen, it's time for everyone's favorite annual tradition! Let's bury the past and look to the future as we discuss some of the biggest movies of 2024. Does Marvel have anything left for us to get hyped on? Does "Dune Pt. 2" win by default? Is Kasen going to try and bring up some goofy nerd sh*t?!

ALL ABOARD THE HYPE TRAIN

The Roman Empire...The McDonald's .99 Double Cheeseburger...my ability to adequately host a podcast...all great things will come to an end, and this includes the once untouchable "Marvel Cinematic Universe".

It was the best of times, and it's currently the worst of times for Kevin Feige and the MCU.  Disney + content is diluting the brand with mediocre series, the movies have been wildly inconsistent and convoluted, and "The Marvels" just made slightly less money than my elementary school's D.A.R.E. fundraiser in 1994, and it was also terrible and immediately forgotten.  Dark times, but it's always darkest before the dawn...right?? Right everyone? Please God tell me dawn is coming!

We are gathered here for this very special episode to discuss "The Marvels", discuss how to save the MCU, and discuss the future projects and what they need to accomplish to steer this sinking ship back to respectability.  Just like my father said to me when I turned 13...it's time for a tough conversation.

LET'S SAVE THE MCU

Ladies & Gentlemen...it's hot...

It's TOO hot for me to attempt anything witty or humorous or thoughtful...but we all know what time it is...

HOLLYWOOD WEEK
SUMMER 2023 RECAP 

Ladies & Gentlemen, let's all imagine it's 2013 and you're in the board room at Marvel Studios...Kevin Feige sips his espresso while pointing his taser at you and says "PITCH ME...and SELL ME"

As you sit there trembling, your brain starts firing off random synapses and your mouth has no choice but to speak the absurdity into existence...

"Talking Raccoon!!"
"Vin Diesel is a Tree!"
"WWE Superstar Dave Bautista!"
"Zoe Saldana Green Alien Woman!!"
"Ummmm...Dumbass Guy From the Hit NBC Comedy "Parks & Rec"!!!!"

It's been an amazing journey over the last 9 years, but we have finally arrived at the end..."Guardian of the Galaxy: Vol 3" not only has a lot riding on it because it's the swan song to this story, but it also has a lot riding on it given the current state of the MCU. Does it deliver? Where are we ranking it? Only one way to find out...

Grab your zarg nuts and get ready to party...it's THE REVIEW

Ladies & Gentlemen...they say that absence makes the heart grow fonder, and just when you think your beautiful hearts couldn't grow any fonder, we..are..BACK!

We have so much to talk about so it only makes sense this is one of the longest episodes we've ever recorded...as you go on this epic marathon journey with us, recapping the last few months of movies, television, and news stories...remember to hydrate, remember to take bathroom breaks (unless wearing an adult diaper), and remember to text/message us about how the podcast is too long. Time stamps are below for anyone that wants to cheat!

ENJOY THE RECAP BURGER, LET'S KETCHUP

5:54 - 65
11:18 - Shazam: Fury of the Gods
17:52 - Scream 6
26:49 - Creed 3
36:13 - Cocaine Bear
39:02 - Air
43:11 - Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves
49:37 - Beau is Afraid
1:01:01 - John Wick: Chapter 4
1:14:07 - The Super Mario Bros Movie

1:32:55 - Will Nintendo Create Their Own Cinematic Universe?
1:46:55 - Is Jonathan Majors Career Over?
1:57:34 - Is a New "Harry Potter" Series a Good Idea?

2:10:03 - Ted Lasso (season 3)
2:16:08 - Succession (season 4)
2:18:50 - Beef
2:25:43 - Mrs Davis
2:36:07 - The Last of Us



 

Ladies & Gentlemen, the time has come to review and rank the 31st film in the Marvel Cinematic Universe...the epic beginning of Phase 5...Martin Scorsese's most anticipated of the year...it's time for QUANTUMANIA!

SCOTT LANG vs CONQUEROR KANG

KATE FROM "LOST" vs KANG THE BOSS

HANK PYM vs KANG GOES TO THE GYM

JANET VAN DYNE vs. KANG CONTROLS TIME

Ladies & Gentlemen, there's nothing we appreciate more than constructive criticism...and although we've ignored every single example of this and banned countless listeners for trying to critique the podcast, we're still big big fans.

When it comes to FILM criticism, there is one site to rule them all and that's Rotten Tomatoes..."Pearl Harbor" is sitting at 24%??? "Bring It On" at a respectable 64%?? "Ratatouille" coming in HOT at 96%?? Every movie must go through the FRESH or ROTTEN test, and tonight's very special episode has us putting on our prediction hats and looking at 20 of the biggest upcoming movies and their potential Rotten Tomatoes score.

As Jigsaw famously said in "Saw 5"...I want to play a game...

Ladies & Gentlemen,
We made a New Year’s resolution to only put out episodes that Martin Scorsese would stand up and cheer for…and here we are…this is the big one and we hope you’re ready…

The Top Ten Films of 2022
The 4th Annual Hollywood Week Awards
The MVP of the Year

LET’S CELEBRATE!

Ladies & Gentlemen, there's nothing more healthy and productive than ignoring what's right in front of us, not living in the moment, and constantly thinking about a future we have no control over...so with that being said, let's take a look at our MOST ANTICIPATED FILMS OF 2023!

Does Marvel still have the same appeal it once did? Does Kasen even know what "Indiana Jones" is? Is "Dune Pt 2" an automatic #1 lock because it features both Timothee Chalamet AND Florence Pugh (HOLY SH*T)!?!?

ALL ABOARD THE HYPE TRAIN
LET'S GO

Ladies & Gentlemen…certain things are forever…diamonds, Batman, my wife’s memory of things I’ve done wrong…but for the purpose of this very special episode of The Review…WAKANDA is FOREVER!

That’s right…one of the biggest cultural phenomenons of the last decade has a sequel that went through more issues than the Arizona election process…the tragic death of Chadwick Boseman, the Covid pandemic, Leticia Wright not wanting the vaccine and then breaking her leg…is there any hope this can live up to expectations???

LET’S FIND OUT
WAKANDA FOREVER

Ladies & Gentlemen, the summer is too hot, the winter is too cold, and the spring is just all around terrible let’s be real…but the fall…THE FALL…ahhh it’s a special time of year!

Speaking of special, the 100% Official Doctor and myself have convened once again to recap all the latest and greatest. We’re talking dragons, She Hulks, elderly Michael Myers, Black Dwayne Johnsons, Saul Goodmans, and big Jeff Dahmers!

This is a very special episode for a very special time of year…let the (pumpkin) spice flow!!!

Ladies & Gentlemen…it’s time to put away the questionably minimal bathing suits and the sun tan lotion…summer is coming to an end.

This is the first summer in 3 years that really felt like movies were BACK…the theaters were buzzing, the ice cold Fresca was flowing, and the people were talking! Is “Top Gun: Maverick” the single greatest film ever made? Is “Lightyear” indoctrinating our kids? Is “Nope” dope or do we have no hope and will be forced to mope and cope as it slides down the slope of mediocrity?? 

It’s time for myself and the Official Doctor to recap all the highs and lows of the summer movie season! 

SUMMERTIME SADNESS
LET’S GO

Ladies & Gentlemen…there are certain events in life that will fundamentally change you as a human being.  The birth of a child, the death of a loved one, eating Wendy’s chili for the first time…

But all of these moments pale in comparison to the absolute SPECTACLE that is the Marvel Cinematic Universe at Comic Con!!! Kevin Feige brought so much heat that it brought the podcast back (with special guests!) for a DEEP DIVE into the next 3 years of the MCU.

We are also dropping quick reviews and rankings for Moon Knight, Ms Marvel, Dr Strange in the Multiverse of Madness, and Thor: Love & Thunder!

Cue the “Avengers” theme…it’s time to assemble.

TIME STAMPS

0:09:08 - The complete breakdown of Phase 4, Phase 5, and Phase 6
1:32:40 - Moon Knight review
1:41:27 - Ms Marvel review
1:58:31 - Dr Strange in the Multiverse of Madness review
2:09:53 - Thor: Love & Thunder review

Ladies & Gentlemen, you have spoken and we have listened! Many many of our loyal listeners (3 people) have commented that the lack of “Hollywood Week” content has left them more emotionally devastated than the ending of “Twilight: New Moon”…but the pain stops now!

We are back with a very special episode recapping all the great film & television we’ve checked out in the first 4 months of 2022! We are also dropping our predictions for “Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness” and enjoying Kasen’s last few weeks as an “almost” doctor!

2022 WITH A SIDE OF KETCHUP
LET’S GO

Ladies & Gentlemen…what do Michael Keaton, Val Kilmer, George Clooney, Christian Bale, Ben Affleck, and Robert Pattinson have in common?? They all listen to the Hollywood Week podcast, they all love Dairy Queen Blizzards, and they all played Batman on the big screen!

That’s right…on this very special episode of The Review, we’re discussing the highs and lows of “The Batman”!! Was it worth the wait?? Is the stigma of Edward Cullen gone forever?? How much Taco Bell did Colin Farrell consume to look like that?? 

They think this podcast is playing in the shadows…but this podcast IS the shadows…and also vengeance. LET’S DIVE IN!

Ladies & Gentlemen, despite every human being on the planet having Covid and “Morbius” getting delayed for the 9th time, we are still celebrating…please clap…

2021 is in the rear view, and it’s time to reflect in what promises to be our biggest and most sprawling episode we’ve ever attempted! Here’s what we have planned…

The 3rd Annual Hollywood Week Awards

The Top Ten Films of 2021

The Most Disappointing Film of 2021

The Definitive Ranking of the MCU on Disney+

The MVP of 2021

…and much much more…we’re serious

Stay hydrated and strap in for “The Irishman” of podcasts…one last ride, let’s go!

Ladies & Gentlemen!

The Hogwarts Express…the Polar Express…the locomotive from “Under Siege 2: Dark Territory”…these are iconic trains that have left a lasting impact on the culture, but all of them pale in comparison to what we are riding on this very special episode…ALL ABOARD THE HYPE TRAIN!!!!!!!!

Our annual tradition has returned! We are counting down the TOP TEN MOST ANTICIPATED FILMS OF 2022…how much MCU is too much? How much Tom Cruise is too much? How can we still put “Dune” on the list despite the fact it came out 3 months ago????? LET’S FIND OUT!

**insert train choo choo noise

Ladies & Gentlemen! After months and months of rumors, speculation, and ridiculous anticipation…we have arrived!

“Spider-Man: No Way Home” is finally in theaters, breaking the box office and breaking our hearts with some of the most emotional moments from the MCU so far. We are diving headfirst into the big crowd pleasing moments, the brutal heartbreak, and every single thing that Wilem Dafoe was bringing to the table! 

What a movie! How high will this rank on our definitive list?? Let’s Scooby Doo this crap and find out!