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    Self-Helpless

    Described by fans as "an unfiltered thera-brunch with your best friends," and "light conversations about heavy sh*t," The Self-Helpless Podcast candidly explores the highs, lows, and gray areas of all things personal growth. Enjoy special guests — including authors, health professionals, and a variety of public figures. Hosted by comedy writer, activist, and someone deemed by listeners as having "BSE" (big sister energy), Delanie Fischer. Exclusive rewards are now available at patreon.com/selfhelpless. 

    enDelanie Fischer339 Episodes

    Episodes (339)

    When My Husband Came Out: Infidelity, Divorce, and Friendship with Jessica Frew

    When My Husband Came Out: Infidelity, Divorce, and Friendship with Jessica Frew

    This week, Delanie Fischer is joined by Jessica Frew, co-host of The Husband In Law Podcast -- where she shares stories of marriage, infidelity, coming out, remarriage, and co-parenting alongside her co-hosts, Steve (her gay ex-husband) and Matt (her current husband). Yes, you read that right. Jessica shares about her first marriage, which included discovering that her then-husband is gay, the pain of betrayal, and reinventing herself after divorce. This episode will absolutely make you feel less alone if you're navigating deceit, separation, or loss, and offers some great steps for reconnecting with your gut, rebuilding your confidence, and nurturing new life and relationships.


    Plus:

    + How Jessica's Intuition Led To A Huge Reveal

    + Handling Criticism When Sharing Your Story

    + How To Reframe Betrayal To Aid In Healing


    For exclusive rewards and to influence content for the show, join our Patreon community: https://www.patreon.com/selfhelpless


    Delanie: https://www.delaniefischer.com

    See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

    How To Heal From Narcissistic Relationships with Dr. Ramani Durvasula

    How To Heal From Narcissistic Relationships with Dr. Ramani Durvasula

    This week, Delanie Fischer is joined by licensed clinical psychologist and leading expert on narcissism, Dr. Ramani Durvasula. Dr. Ramani shares guidance for identifying and healing from narcissistic relationships, including the first steps for leaving or reestablishing boundaries, health issues that may arise due to enduring this kind of toxicity, how long you should stay single after a narcissistic relationship ends, what co-parenting with a narcissist can look like, why not everyone may be supportive of the changes you’re making in your relationship, the range of guilt you may experience, and so. much. more.


    Plus:

    + The 3 Groups of People You’ll Meet on Your Road to Recovery

    + Why Status Quo Relationship Advice Does NOT Work For Narcissistic Relationships

    + How To Keep Your Good (And Bad) News To Yourself Around A Narcissist


    For exclusive rewards and to influence content for the show, join our Patreon community: https://www.patreon.com/selfhelpless


    Delanie: https://www.delaniefischer.com

    See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

    7 Shocking Truths About Codependency And Addiction with Heidi Rain

    7 Shocking Truths About Codependency And Addiction with Heidi Rain

    This week, Delanie Fischer is joined by Codependency and Addiction Expert and Author of “Codependent Attachment Personality Patterns,” Heidi Rain. Heidi describes the different styles of codependent attachments, the relationship between addiction and codependency — including codependency being an addiction in itself, why holding onto control doesn’t work (and how to relinquish it), and what we need to let go of in order to break away from, or transform, damaging relational dynamics. If you're experiencing similar, undesirable outcomes in your work, life, or relationships on loop, and you're ready to make some changes, do NOT miss this episode.


    Plus:

    + The difference between expectations vs. standards in a relationship (and how to face reality)

    + Recognizing codependent behaviors — even when they've been normalized for you

    + Heidi's #1 quote for building unshakable confidence in the face of criticism and rejection


    For exclusive rewards and to influence content for the show, join our Patreon community: https://www.patreon.com/selfhelpless


    Delanie: https://www.delaniefischer.com

    See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

    Self-Helpless
    enFebruary 26, 2024

    When Your Dream Job Ends with Sam Fischer

    When Your Dream Job Ends with Sam Fischer

    This week, Delanie Fischer is joined by her cousin and professional softball player, Sam Fischer. Sam shares how she feels about leaving her dream job, what she's considering for her next career move, the biggest challenges, blessings, and sacrifices she's experienced, and what's aided her longevity over 10+ years as a professional athlete. Failure, starting over, grief, recognition, and identity are just a few things covered during this discussion - if you're amidst a life or career transition, this episode is packed with takeaways for you.


    Plus:

    + How Sam is approaching her last season

    + The #1 value she ascribes to her success

    + How she crafted a plan for starting over


    For exclusive rewards and to influence content for the show, join our Patreon community: https://www.patreon.com/selfhelpless


    Delanie: https://www.delaniefischer.com

    See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

    How To Un-F*ck Your Relationships

    How To Un-F*ck Your Relationships

    This week, we have a stacked compilation episode for you filled with life-changing relationship advice from some of our brilliant past guests. NYT bestselling author, Greg Behrendt, Relationship Therapist from Married At First Sight, Dr. Viviana Coles, Sexologist, Goody Howard, Comedian, Ken Garr, Communication Expert from Married At First Sight, Rachel DeAlto, Licensed Therapist, Kati Morton, Certified Sex Addiction Therapist, Dr. Alex Katehakis, and Licensed Psychologist and Sex Therapist, Dr. Kate Balistrieri are sharing their best tips for breaking toxic patterns, cultivating healthy relationships, and healing trauma.


    Plus:

    + How The 4 Intimacy Styles are different from The 5 Love Languages

    + 4 simple (and free) tips for boosting excitement with a long-term sexual partner

    + Why you might be stuck in a pattern of getting "the ick" and what to do about it


    For exclusive rewards and to influence content for the show, join our Patreon community: https://www.patreon.com/selfhelpless


    Delanie: https://www.delaniefischer.com

    See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

    Self-Helpless
    enFebruary 12, 2024

    12 ADHD Life Hacks with Em Schulz

    12 ADHD Life Hacks with Em Schulz

    12 ADHD Life Hacks With Em Schulz 

    This week, Delanie Fischer is joined by Em Schulz, New York Times bestselling author and co-host of the hit paranormal and true crime podcast, And That's Why We Drink. Em shares about their personal experience with ADHD, the feelings that can coincide with receiving this diagnosis as an adult, and fantastic hacks for jumpstarting motivation, getting chores done with less rumination, and prioritizing self-care. Whether you're neurodivergent or not, these tips are brilliant for creating more ease, accessibility, and fun in your life.


    Plus:

    + Em's #1 tip for keeping a tidy space 

    + Advice for neurodivergent entrepreneurs

    + Em's favorite thing about having ADHD  


    For exclusive rewards and to influence content for the show, join our Patreon community: https://www.patreon.com/selfhelpless

    Delanie: https://www.delaniefischer.com

    See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

    Self-Helpless
    enFebruary 05, 2024

    10 Celebrities Share Their Favorite Nuggets of Wisdom

    10 Celebrities Share Their Favorite Nuggets of Wisdom

    This week, we have a jam-packed compilation episode for you filled with delicious nuggets of wisdom from some of our incredible past guests. Tan France, Brian Regan, Whitney Cummings, Michael Buble,' Pete Holmes, Preacher Lawson, Nikki Glaser, Freddie Prinze Jr., Gad Elmaleh, and Mike Birbiglia are sharing their favorite quotes, books, philosophies, pivotal moments, and self-care practices.

    Plus:

    + Find out which guest never wanted to be famous

    + Why, "yes, thank you," will be your new favorite mind-hack

    + What we can all learn from a pack of wolves (it's BRILLIANT)

    For exclusive rewards and to influence content for the show, join our Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/selfhelpless

    Delanie: https://www.delaniefischer.com

    See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

    Self-Helpless
    enJanuary 29, 2024

    Kelsey’s Final Episode

    Kelsey’s Final Episode

    This week is a tearjerker as it’s Kelsey’s last episode as a co-host of The Self-Helpless Podcast. We’re sharing stories about the beginning times, the huge life and career transitions that we’ve experienced while recording the podcast for almost 7 years, how this experience has impacted us, and what’s next for everyone. Self-Helpless will live on, but let’s give Kelsey a proper send-off!

    For exclusive rewards and to influence content for the show, join our Patreon community: https://www.patreon.com/selfhelpless

    Delanie: https://www.delaniefischer.com

    Kelsey: https://www.kelseycook.com

    Sales and distribution by Lemonada Media.

    See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

    Self-Helpless
    enJanuary 22, 2024

    How To Navigate Entrepreneurial Dread

    How To Navigate Entrepreneurial Dread

    We’re talking about the scary feelings that come along with entrepreneurship, and what helps us manage them. The pros and cons of being your own boss, the pressure of being responsible for the livelihood of a team, how the hell to create some predictability amidst a sea of uncertainty, and combatting compulsive working are all things we cover in this episode. Plus, what do you do when you’re tired of running your business and need a change? Entrepreneurs, creatives, multi-hyphenates, this episode is for you!

    For exclusive rewards and to influence content for the show, join our Patreon community: https://www.patreon.com/selfhelpless

    Delanie: https://www.delaniefischer.com

    Kelsey: https://www.kelseycook.com

    Sales and distribution by Lemonada Media.

    See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

    Self-Helpless
    enJanuary 15, 2024

    Depression, Antidepressants, and Burnout

    Depression, Antidepressants, and Burnout

    This week, we’re sharing some personal experiences with antidepressants, depression, and burnout including the challenges of loving work that’s negatively impacting your health, prolonged grief, situational depression, the importance of rest and play, and all the feelings that arise when considering, and experimenting with, antidepressants. *This episode contains some sensitive information, please tune in at your discretion.

    For exclusive rewards, and to influence content for the show, join our Patreon community: https://www.patreon.com/selfhelpless

    Delanie: https://www.delaniefischer.com

    Kelsey: https://www.kelseycook.com

    See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

    Self-Helpless
    enJanuary 08, 2024

    Our Biggest Takeaways From The Past 50+ Episodes

    Our Biggest Takeaways From The Past 50+ Episodes

    Kelsey Cook and Delanie Fischer are sharing their biggest takeaways from their guests and topics this past year, including simple concepts that have helped them dial down their perfectionism, process grief differently, and take their literal dreams more seriously -- as well as their favorite quote of the year! Also, a recent woo-woo experience and an unexpected trip in an ambulance.

    For exclusive rewards, and to influence content for the show, join our Patreon community: https://www.patreon.com/selfhelpless

    Delanie: https://www.delaniefischer.com

    Kelsey: https://www.kelseycook.com

    See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

    Self-Helpless
    enJanuary 01, 2024

    What We Wish We Knew In Our 20s

    What We Wish We Knew In Our 20s

    Delanie Fischer and Kelsey Cook are traveling back in time to give their younger selves some advice. Everything from what would’ve set them up financially over the last decade, habits they wish they adopted earlier that had an enormous impact on their mental and physical health, the information that would’ve transformed their relationships, and ya know, how to avoid split ends and pyramid schemes.

    For exclusive rewards, and to influence content for the show, join our Patreon community: https://www.patreon.com/selfhelpless

    Delanie: https://www.delaniefischer.com

    Kelsey: https://www.kelseycook.com

    See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

    Self-Helpless
    enDecember 25, 2023

    30 Life Hacks We Love with Delanie Fischer and Kelsey Cook

    30 Life Hacks We Love with Delanie Fischer and Kelsey Cook

    Delanie Fischer and Kelsey Cook are sharing their favorite hacks that make the daily demands of life more manageable -- including hot tips for untangling hair knots and cutting animals' nails, how to save a bunch of money on home decor, what you need in order to travel with more ease, mindset wizardry that stops anxiety spirals, and most importantly, tons of guidance for how we can all support Kelsey with cutting bananas.

    For exclusive rewards, and to influence content for the show, join our Patreon community: https://www.patreon.com/selfhelpless

    Delanie: https://www.delaniefischer.com

    Kelsey: https://www.kelseycook.com

    See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

    Self-Helpless
    enDecember 18, 2023

    Finding Hobbies as an Adult Feels Weird with Beth Stelling

    Finding Hobbies as an Adult Feels Weird with Beth Stelling

    Kelsey Cook and Delanie Fischer are joined by comedian, Beth Stelling, to chat about finding fulfilling hobbies as an adult. They discuss going back to stuff they enjoyed as a kid, trying brand new things that they suck at, and all of the feelings that can come with introducing, or reintroducing, a hobby into your life -- including joy, excitement, frustration, grief, and impostor syndrome. If you’re finding it hard to carve out time for fun amidst your responsibilities, we hope this episode gives you some ideas for how to start. 

    For exclusive rewards and to influence content for the show, join our Patreon community: https://www.patreon.com/selfhelpless

    Delanie: https://www.delaniefischer.com

    Kelsey: https://www.kelseycook.com

    See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

    Self-Helpless
    enDecember 11, 2023

    The Biggest Lessons We Learned In 2023

    The Biggest Lessons We Learned In 2023

    Kelsey Cook and Delanie Fischer are sharing their biggest lessons from the past year. Everything from how they spend time with loved ones, changes in spending habits, healing from codependency, the importance of hobbies, and what can birth from the loss of identity. Plus, their highlights and lowlights from 2023. This year has been extra adult-y for them, how about you??

    For exclusive rewards and to influence content for the show, join our Patreon community: https://www.patreon.com/selfhelpless

    Delanie: https://www.delaniefischer.com

    Kelsey: https://www.kelseycook.com

    See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

    Self-Helpless
    enDecember 04, 2023

    Rethinking the 5 Stages of Grief with Krista St-Germain

    Rethinking the 5 Stages of Grief with Krista St-Germain

    Delanie Fischer and Kelsey Cook are joined by Krista St-Germain, Master Certified Life Coach, Post-Traumatic Growth and grief expert, widow, mom, and host of The Widowed Mom Podcast. Krista opens up about the loss of her husband, the range of grief she’s experienced since, and the simple shifts that can help us process and heal. She also shares why we need to rethink the 5 stages of grief, what she dislikes about some mainstream concepts about the grieving process, and how to let go of guilt around experiencing joy after loss.

    For exclusive rewards, and to influence content for the show, join our Patreon community: https://www.patreon.com/selfhelpless

    Delanie: https://www.delaniefischer.com

    Kelsey: https://www.kelseycook.com

    See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

    Self-Helpless
    enNovember 27, 2023

    How Enmeshment Trauma Impacts Every Relationship You Have with Dr. Kate Balestrieri

    How Enmeshment Trauma Impacts Every Relationship You Have with Dr. Kate Balestrieri

    Delanie Fischer and Kelsey Cook are joined by sex therapist and licensed psychologist, Dr. Kate Balestrieri. Dr. Kate educates us on all things enmeshment trauma -- how it can impact our romantic relationships, the types of partners we’re drawn to, our familial relationships and friendships, as well as how it shapes our identity, self-worth, and perspective on love and boundaries. Whether you're just learning about this topic, healing from your own enmeshment trauma, or you want to break unhealthy patterns in your current relationships, this episode is an absolute must-listen.

    For exclusive rewards, and to influence content for the show, join our Patreon community: https://www.patreon.com/selfhelpless

    Delanie: https://www.delaniefischer.com

    Kelsey: https://www.kelseycook.com

    See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

    Self-Helpless
    enNovember 20, 2023

    10 Simple Safety Tips You Need To Know with Joy Farrow and Laura Frombach

    10 Simple Safety Tips You Need To Know with Joy Farrow and Laura Frombach

    Delanie Fischer and Kelsey Cook are joined by Former Deputy Sheriff, Joy Farrow, and Technologist and Domestic Violence Survivor, Laura Frombach, to discuss street-smart safety and defensive living. They share practical tips for a variety of scenarios -- online dating, rideshares, traveling on your own, being home alone, and more. Plus, a variety of affordable safety tools and technology options, and their personal and professional experiences with combatting violence. We hope the guidance in this episode equips you with what you need to feel prepared, and as safe as possible. Please share this episode with your loved ones! *Some content may be difficult for survivors of abuse. 

    For exclusive rewards, and to influence content for the show, join our Patreon community: https://www.patreon.com/selfhelpless

    Delanie: https://www.delaniefischer.com

    Kelsey: https://www.kelseycook.com

    See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

    Self-Helpless
    enNovember 13, 2023

    How To Navigate A Situationship

    How To Navigate A Situationship

    Delanie Fischer and Kelsey Cook are talking situationships -- signs you’re in one, pros and cons, tips for defining the relationship (if you want to), and offering up their variety of personal experience with these kinds of relationships from all ends of the situationship spectrum, including how friends with benefits turned into a marriage for one of them. Whether your situationship is working great for you, it’s been hard for a while, or you’re not really even sure how you feel about it, this episode is for you.

    For exclusive rewards, and to influence content for the show, join our Patreon community: https://www.patreon.com/selfhelpless

    Delanie: https://www.delaniefischer.com

    Kelsey: https://www.kelseycook.com

    See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

    Self-Helpless
    enNovember 06, 2023

    Are You Having A Quarter-Life Crisis?

    Are You Having A Quarter-Life Crisis?

    Kelsey Cook and Delanie Fischer are discussing the concept of a quarter-life crisis, and how they’re definitely amidst one (they thought they were passed this sh*t!?). They're sharing how this experience differs to what they went through in their 20s, what feels eerily similar, and the things that actually help them stabilize during times of uncertainty. They also audit some major life categories and reveal which feel great, and which feel off. If you thought you paid your dues in your 20s, but are stumblin’ around your 30s wondering WTF, you’re not alone!

    For exclusive rewards, and to influence content for the show, join our Patreon community: https://www.patreon.com/selfhelpless

    Delanie: https://www.delaniefischer.com

    Kelsey: https://www.kelseycook.com

    See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

    Self-Helpless
    enOctober 30, 2023