Spank U, Next: A Fetish & BDSM Podcast

Listen to an old fan favourite about DDLG (daddy Dom/little girl), littlespace, age play, and so much more! 

You're invited to explore the much-misunderstood world of age play and DDLG (Daddy Dom/Little Girl) with hosts Anna and Gregor. They are joined by Shaun and Sarah, a couple who met on Fetish.com, to talk littlespace, consent, sensual domination, aftercare, and funishment vs. punishment. Get educated on the BDSM community's move towards the gender-inclusive term Caregiver/little, and let them debunk some misconceptions you may have about Daddy Doms and their littles. 

In this episode of BDSM Basics, we're taking it back to basics... literally. Sadomasochism: what is it? Where did it come from? How can you explore it? Listen now, you sadistic/masochistic freaks!

Timestamps:

00:00:03 - Introduction to BDSM Basics
00:01:44 - Defining Sadism and Masochism
00:02:32 - Origins of Sadism
00:03:46 - Marquis de Sade's Novel "Justine"
00:04:30 - Historical Context of Sadism
00:05:36 - Marquis de Sade's Reputation
00:06:21 - Origins of Masochism
00:07:25 - Psychiatry and BDSM in History
00:08:11 - Therapy and BDSM Today
00:09:07 - Power Dynamics in Sadism
00:09:38 - Control and Submission in Masochism
00:11:00 - The Sensation of Pain in BDSM
00:12:04 - Differentiating BDSM Pain from Other Pain
00:12:44 - Importance of Consent and Control
00:13:48 - Psychological Aspects of Pain Enjoyment
00:14:53 - Sexual Arousal and Pain
00:15:28 - BDSM Play Without Sexual Context
00:16:09 - Advice for Exploring BDSM
00:17:02 - Choosing the Right Play Partner
00:17:38 - Blood Play and Safety Precautions
00:18:19 - Closing Remarks and Contact Information

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Delve into the dynamic and evolving landscape of porn with the multifaceted adult performer and activist, Mickey Mod. Hosts Anna and Gregor chat to the seasoned porn performer – who is not only passionate about his craft, but also deeply invested in advocating for the rights of sex workers – about ethical adult content, race, sex work, and so much more. Mickey Mod is an industry icon – enjoy his wisdom here.

Timestamps:

00:04:18 - Mickey's entry into the porn industry
00:06:05 - BDSM community and performance spaces
00:07:01 - Changes in the porn industry and online spaces
00:08:09 - Performer empowerment
00:09:02 - The impact of ranking systems and social media
00:10:02 - Success on OnlyFans
00:11:26 - The Effects of FOSTA/SESTA on sex work
00:13:18 - Collective Corruption
00:14:38 - Stigma and career challenges post-adult industry
00:16:07 - Decriminalization of sex work
00:17:33 - Mickey's work behind the scenes
00:18:40 - Fluidity and labels
00:21:02 - Skills from the adult industry and mainstream rejection
00:22:09 - Shadow banning and its impact
00:24:54 - Ethical content creation
00:27:02 - Consent and power dynamics in BDSM
00:30:05 - Mickey's personal kinks and hard limits
00:33:04 - Consent and misunderstandings in online interactions
00:35:05 - Race play and its complexities
00:37:13 - Exploring power dynamics and submissive roles
00:38:19 - Butt stuff and societal stigmas

Follow Mickey on X (formerly Twitter) at @theMickeyMod.  Check out Collective Corruption here.   

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Sun salutations, Tantra, the inner goddess... and kink. Sound like a strange mix? Not for Alice and Pau, two yoga coaches and instructors bringing kinky yoga to women and couples looking to do some self-discovery. They tell Anna and Gregor why yoga and BDSM are a heady mix that opens up the sensual and sexual self.

Timestamps:

0000:00 - Intro
00:04:40 - Discovery of Kinky Yoga
00:07:29 - Rise Women Rise Collective and Retreats
00:08:46 - Concept of Holy Whore Retreat
00:11:30 - Explaining Tantra
00:14:53 - Hosts' Background in Kink
00:18:03 - Creating Safe Spaces in Kinky Workshops
00:19:17 - Consent and Boundaries in Workshops
00:20:01 - Introducing Toys in Kinky Yoga
00:23:01 - Demystifying Feminine Sexuality
00:25:29 - Empowerment and Performance in Sexuality
00:26:12 - Kinky Yoga Experience for Newcomers
00:27:48 - Partner Work in Kinky Yoga
00:29:00 - Feedback from Workshop Participants
00:32:06 - Aftercare and Upcoming Workshops
00:33:49 - Inviting Experts to Kinky Workshops
00:34:07 - Hosts' Interest in Attending a Workshop
00:35:00 - Accessibility of Kinky Yoga for Beginners
00:37:42 - Where to Find Kinky Yoga and Contact Info
00:39:32 - Barcelona's Sex-Positive Scene
00:40:03 - Mainstreaming BDSM and Sensual Kink
00:41:16 - Importance of Communication in Sex
00:42:10 - Closing Remarks and Podcast Promotion

Attend their next kinky yoga retreat in Barcelona on 21st January by signing up here. Also, check out their Wholly Whore retreats and Rise Women Rise collective and retreats. 

For more info about the founders, visit Alice's website and Pau's website. 

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Dominatrix and kinky influencer Eva Oh is in the studio with Anna and Gregor to talk about her fascinating journey to sex work. She went from working in strategic consulting to becoming a highly successful dominatrix, now earning up to $10,000 a day with an online following in the hundreds of thousands. Eva shares the psychological aspects of her work – particularly her interest in power dynamics and emotional masochism – and misconceptions surrounding sex work and the BDSM community.

Timestamps:

00:06:12 - Learning the Ropes of Domination
00:07:59 - First Session Experience
00:09:08 - Emotional Connection in Domination
00:10:23 - The Financial Aspects of Being a Dominatrix
00:12:05 - Rates and Earnings as a Dominatrix
00:14:32 - Transitioning from Dungeon to Online Presence
00:16:32 - Personal Life and Boundaries
00:18:25 - Misconceptions About Sex Work and Domination
00:20:03 - Communication and Societal Expectations
00:21:07 - Prejudices and Learning New Kinks
00:23:30 - Understanding Age Play
00:24:13 - Public Perception and Acceptance of Kink
00:25:09 - Family Reactions to Sex Work
00:27:54 - Mainstream Interest in Fetish and BDSM
00:29:30 - Career Limitations After Sex Work
00:30:57 - Promoting Eva O's Podcast and Work
00:32:24 - Post-Interview Reflections
00:34:23 - Podcast Outro and Credits

Visit Eva's official website here. You can also follow her on Instagram and Twitter and listen to her podcast #teakink wherever you get your podcasts. 

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BDSM often gets a bad rap in pop culture, notably exacerbated by the problematic portrayal in 'Fifty Shades of Grey'. Determined to shift the narrative, Anna and Gregor sit down with kinky documentary director Todd Max Carey to talk about his latest project, 'Touch Kink,' a film that explores real-world BDSM and fetishism. Carey tells the story of how he got into BDSM and why it was so important for him to bring the stories of other kinky people to the big screen. Tune in as they navigate through Carey's personal journey, the importance of authentic representation, and the impact of his work in normalizing kink within the community.

Timestamps: 
00:01:14 Istanbul and LGBTQ+ experiences.
00:03:40 Kink in conservative countries.
00:09:07 Discovering personal identity.
00:11:38 Touch Kink documentary and characters.
00:15:27 Stigmatization of kink.
00:20:10 Kinky fashion throughout history.
00:20:41 Fetish and desires.
00:24:21 Building trust in the community.
00:27:35 Male vs. female Dom ratios.
00:33:08 Normalizing kink in mainstream media.
00:34:53 BDSM training school on fetish.com.

Visit the official website of 'Touch Kink' here.

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It's all about leather in this episode of Spank U, Next... and quite frankly, it's long overdue. The leather fetish community is perhaps the most well-known aesthetic of the queer kinky community – but where is at today? Once thriving leather bars in New York, San Francisco and beyond have closed their doors as dating apps fill the supply and demand of queer and kinky sex. Artist Steven Harwick, a Brooklyn-based artist, has been photographing modern leather kink culture and how the subculture has evolved in his zine Bound Leather and on his Instagram page. He is in the studio with Anna and Gregor to talk about his work, as well as his personal experiences as a member of the queer leather community.

Check out Steven's Bound Leather zine here. Follow him on Instagram here. Steven's website can be found here.

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It's the spooky season – the demons are among us. So Anna and Gregor dive into the realm of vampire fetishism and blood play in this special Halloween episode. They talk Buffy the Vampire Slayer and gothic influences, how vampire fetishists play with their prey, and their recent trip to New Orleans, a city with a vibrant vampire community.

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Listen to an old fan favourite about the world of full-time BDSM with fellow podcasters and IRL couple Kayla Lords and John Brownstone (JB). The husband and wife duo met on the internet before sparking up a 24/7 Daddy Dom/sub dynamic in their shared home in Florida. Hosts Anna & Gregor get the lowdown on what it takes to make a kinky partnership work all day – every day. From the domestic to the downright dirty, Kayla (affectionately dubbed the ‘coffee sub’) and JB lift the lid on round-the-clock BDSM.

Check out Kayla and John's podcast Loving BDSM here. 

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Spank U, Next is back after a summer hiatus and you're in for a treat. World-renowned sex therapist and kink specialist Dr. Stefani Goerlich is in the studio to talk about BDSM and psychology. Early into her work, Stefani was struck by the kink-shaming she saw among other sex therapists and decided to do things differently. She takes an empathetic and non-stigmatising approach to help kinky people (and their partners) enjoy good sexual health and happiness. In this episode, Stefani tells Anna and Gregor about how BDSM is pathologised in mainstream therapy, ways to practice good communication with a vanilla partner, and the perks and pitfalls of polyamory.

Check out Stefani's website here. Pre-order her new book 'With Sprinkles on Top' here.

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All anyone is talking about is AI. How it’s coming for our jobs, our minds, and our sex lives. But does ChatGPT know a thing or two about BDSM? It appears so. New AI tools tend to swerve sexual and adult content – including anything about kinks – but Anna & Gregor hacked ChatGPT to become a curious kinkster. They were surprised about its sophistication – as you will be, too.

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In this episode of BDSM Basics, Anna and Gregor explore the world of foot fetishes and how the allure of feet may be tied to their taboo nature, often associated with dirt and sweat. Listen as they make biblical references to foot worship and discuss the symbolism of submission and adoration tied up with these fetishes. If 1 in 3 people have a fetish, and foot fetishes are the most common, that's a lot of people into feet. 

Timestamps:

• Intro [00:00:00] 
• Why sexualizing feet feels taboo [00:03:17] 
• Foot fetishes as the gateway drug [00:05:58] 
• How to communicate your foot fetish [00:12:30]
• BDSM and feet [00:16:15] 

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Have you ever found yourself in a relationship where sex goes from hot to hardly ever? It's a tale as old as the orgasm gap, but there's actually a lot you can do about it. The UK’s leading psychosexual therapist Kate Moyle is in the studio with Anna and Gregor to talk about desire, sex and the therapist's couch. They dive into topics like why sex dwindles in long-term relationships, how mums can get their groove back after maternity, prioritising pleasure over penetration, and exploring BDSM with the help of a therapist.

Timestamps:

00:05:00 Why sex therapy is crucial and ever-evolving
00:07:08 How psychosexual therapy is nuanced and individual
00:14:01 The importance of communication to enjoy a better sex life
00:15:12 Prioritise physical intimacy and pleasure even if you don't feel like it
00:20:00 On how to reconnect sexually after childbirth
00:27:43 Sexual satisfaction is subjective and individual
00:34:25 There is no objective measure of good sex
00:39:31 Why kink-aware therapists are so vital

Check out Kate's website here. You can also listen to her podcast The Sexual Wellness Sessions on Apple and Spotify.  And follow her on Instagram.

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Been ghosted by your Dom? Did a kinky relationship end abruptly and you're left pining? Breakups are always tough – in BDSM, they're tougher. Trust and consent are such fundamental components of any dynamic that a rupturing of these things can feel devastating. It's abandonment, but without the play. Don't fret, though, co-hosts Anna and Gregor are here to walk you through the healing process, so you can get back to indulging the kinks you love. 

Timestamps:

• Intro [00:00:00] 
• When your kinky partner breaks it off [00:05:07] 
• Ghosting – forget the idea of closure [00:07:09] 
• When a breach of trust ruins a dynamic [00:10:26]
• Do the impossible: forgive [00:13:17] 

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 Today, BDSM podcast royalty is in the studio with co-hosts Anna and Gregor. Tina Horn’s podcast ‘Why are people into that?!’ – where she has candid, thoughtful and steamy conversations with people about sex, kink, gender and love – is a go-to audio bible for fetishists everywhere. Horn found the kink community through sex work and Domming and is now a world-renowned author and creator of sci-fi sex work comics, a diehard queer punk, and an “educatrix”. Don’t miss this one. 

Timestamps:

• Intro [00:00:00] 
• Exploring BDSM and sex work for the first time [00:04:33]  
• 'Why are people into that?! Podcast' about sex and kink [00:05:38] 
• Sexual subcultures in the San Francisco Bay Area [00:11:28]
• Acing consent and communication in kink [00:19:17] 
• Learning from each other and having fun [00:29:23] 
• On why sex and gender expression is important [00:33:47] 
• Supporting sex workers and the sex work community [00:38:02] 
• Finding community in kink and BDSM [00:43:09] 

Listen to Why are people into that?! on Apple, Spotify, Google or wherever you get your podcasts.

Check out Tina's website here. Her Twitter is @tinahornsass. And find her on Instragram here.

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"The butt is the new pussy", says co-host and anal aficionado Gregor. In this new episode of BDSM Basics, he gives Anna the lowdown on all things anal, prostate stimulation and the gateway to new forms of pleasure. Expect expert anal-ysis on preparation and practice, how to try butt play for the first time, and why everyone should be using lube. Straight, gay, bi or anything in-between, the bum is for everyone. Welcome to anal 101.  

Timestamps: 

• Knowledge is power in anal play [00:01:47] 
• Be open and understand your limits [00:09:50]  
• Try on yourself before experimenting with other people [00:14:59] 
• Relax, breathe – and lube! [00:15:15]
• Fisting [00:15:25]

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On the perks of being a bisexual boyslut!! New York columnist, author, and sex expert Zachary Zane is in the studio with hosts Anna and Gregor to talk about his bisexual journey and how the community has got stronger over the last ten years. They talk ethical non-monogamy, struggling to exist in both queer and straight culture, and why being slutty is the best way.

Timestamps:

00:00:00 Intro
00:04:44 Bisexuals need acceptance and support.
00:09:09 Men need sex positivity too.
00:10:41 Create inclusive sexual communities.
00:16:18 Bi people are valid and accepted.
00:21:27 Embrace and love each other.
00:29:10 Straight people welcome in queer spaces.
00:33:53 Kink community is tolerant.
00:35:00 Rejecting people is tough.
00:40:38 Explore your kinks freely.

Check out Zachary's website here. His new book is called Boyslut and you can buy it wherever books are sold.

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BDSM contracts: what are they, who needs them, and why? That's what hosts Anna and Gregor are discussing in the newest episode of BDSM Basics. Forget what you learnt in Fifty Shades of Grey – get a real education here.

Here are some BDSM contract templates to help you get started.

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Spank U, Next: A Fetish & BDSM Podcast is back and bigger than ever! To kick off season 3, hosts Anna and Gregor are joined by entrepreneur, businesswoman and social sex activist Cindy Gallop to talk real sex  – not porn. Cindy learned about the negative effects of porn on IRL sex by exclusively dating younger men, and as a result founded her company MakeLoveNotPorn in 2009. In this episode, Cindy talks real sex for real people, Big Tech's big problem with adult content and how she's changing the future of sex tech for women. 

Timestamps: 

• Intro [00:00:00] 
• How MakeLoveNotPorn was born [00:08:41]  
• Real world sex vs. porn fantasy [00:13:20] 
• Why female founders struggle to get funding [00:15:12]
• Advertising sex tech: The big white male problem [00:19:33] 
• A new ad tech for banned sex-positive businesses [00:24:41] 
• Sexual safety concerns on social media [00:28:23] 
• De-kinkifying sex [00:33:51] 
• A new kind of sex education for children and adults [00:38:19] 
• Lessons in pleasure [00:42:53] 

Check out Cindy's website MakeLoveNotPorn here. Watch her TED talk here. 

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Join the revolution of pleasure. Spank U, Next: A Fetish & BDSM Podcast is back for a third season with hosts Anna & Gregor from Fetish.com. Look out for the first episode of season 3 dropping this week!