The Dildorks

Is porn addiction real? Is the NoFap community just a bunch of chastity fetishists? Are men okay? This week Kate chats with Kris Taylor, an academic from New Zealand who has studied porn addiction discourse and the NoFap movement, about all of the above and more.
 

Origin Story | Masculinity | New or Old? | NoFap Research | Homoeroticism in NoFap | Women on NoFap | Giving Pleasure | Eroticizing Self-Denial | Dust Breeding | Barriers & Tension | Sexual Fantasy | Male Pleasure | Flure App | Porn Dependency | “No Porn” Rule | Fantastical Fantasies | Vibrators | A Cyborg Manifesto | Solitary Sex | Making Sex | Female Orgasm | Queer & Trans People | Future Research Directions

Credits:

• Music by PROTODOME
• Artwork by amy

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Humor is a big component of our sex and kink, but it’s not always appropriate during scenes. This week we talk about how and when to deploy humor to improve your flirting, domming, or subbing.

Vibrators Dying | Improv Crushes | Take an Improv Class | The Excitement of Humor | Collaboration | Repetition | Tension & Release | Too Much Laughing? | Read the Room | Nothosaur Toys | Breath Play | Nerves & Anxiety | Aftercare | On the Same Page | Making a Top Laugh | Humiliation Play | Funny Kink Scenes | Commit to the Bit

Credits:

• Music by PROTODOME
• Artwork by amy

Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.

Watching porn while in a relationship can be more contentious than watching it while single; this week, we theorize on why that is, and answer listener questions about watching porn with partners.
 

Is OnlyFans Cheating? | Economics | Insecurities & Anxieties | What Porn is For | Extreme Tastes | Watching Porn During Oral | Nothosaur Toys | Sharing Passwords | Porn Stars’ Appearance | Queer Porn with Straight Partners

Credits:

• Music by PROTODOME
• Artwork by amy

Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.

With Valentine’s Day having just passed, this week we tried to figure out what “romance” actually is.

Consistency | Autism & Aromanticism | Love, Inc. | Romantic Attraction | Friendship | New Relationship Energy | Media Love | Nothosaur Toys | What’s Romantic To You? | Reciprocity | Examples of Romance | Surprise | Spontaneous Kisses | Thinking of You | Vulnerability | Sex Games | Remembering Preferences

Credits:

• Music by PROTODOME
• Artwork by amy

Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.

What happens when a sex toy reviewer quits using vibrators? This week Kate and her spouse mb discuss her recent break from using vibes, the reasons for it, and the results of the experiment.

Why? | Vibrator Habituation | Research Questions | Sensitivity | Orgasm Threshold | Orgasm Intensity | Tools | Quitting? | Slowing Down | Sex Ed | How Long It Takes | Manual Stimulation | Hand Weakness | Mental Aspect | Flure | Readjusting | Withdrawal | Polyamory Clause | Natural/Intimate | Alcohol | Internal Spots | Libido & Satisfaction | New Techniques | Mood | Big Nut

Credits:

• Music by PROTODOME
• Artwork by amy

Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.

We’re answering listener questions on sex toys this week – and sharing some of our snarky takes about certain sex toy brands.

Meeting People Where They’re At | Butt Plugs for Long-Term Wear | Njoy Pure Plug | Fun Factory Bootie | Lube for Silicone Anal Toys | Sliquid Silk | Sliquid Sassy | Sutil Rich | Sliquid Organics Gel | Should I Buy More Toys? | Magic Wand Rechargeable | Njoy Pure Wand | VixSkin Toys | Best Orgasms | VixSkin Outlaw | Eroscillator | Fucking Sculptures Double Trouble | Pressure-Wave Toys | Lelo Sila | Womanizer Premium 2 | Satisfyer Pro 2 | Toys for AMAB People | Lovense Edge 2 | Trans Affirming Wear | Ana Valens Article | Fun Factory Manta | Hot Octopuss Pulse | Micropenis Dildo | Uberrime Dildo Tip | Toy Cleaner | DivaWash | Songs About Sex Toys | Rachel Lark Song | “Bad Sex” Song | Lelo | Dick Tux | Owning a Sex Shop

Credits:

• Music by PROTODOME
• Artwork by amy

Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.

Watersports is a wet, wild, and wonderful kink! This week, we’re discussing piss play: what we find hot about it (and what we don’t), how we’ve incorporated it into scenes, and how to do it safely and with minimal mess.
 

Why Is It Hot? | Comparison to Scat | Taboo | Intimate | Messy | Pissing on Command | STPs | Peeing Inside Someone | Bladder Control | Not Fresh From the Tap | Piss Cocktails | Roleplays | In the Bedroom | Age Play | Hydration

Credits:

• Music by PROTODOME
• Artwork by amy

Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.

Take a peek inside our brains: this week we’re recounting our favorite sexual fantasies from 2023, and setting some sex goals for the coming year.
 

New Fantasies | Extortion/Blackmail | Alley Sex | Wet Dreams | Coworkers | Cuckolding | Quora Threads | Last Year’s Goals | Hump! Film Festival | New Goals

Credits:

• Music by PROTODOME
• Artwork by amy

Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.

Ready to get incredibly nerdy about sex toys? This week we’re discussing the toys we loved most in 2023, as well as recapping the best sex we had in the past year!

Standard Glass S-Curve | Magic Wand Rechargeable | Njoy Pure Wand | VixSkin Outlaw | RealCock | Tantus Uncut | Magic Wand Mini | Magic Wand Micro | Fun Factory Vim | Hole Punch Fluke | Uberrime Suavis | Lovense Toys | Miss Rose Paddles | LilFoxToyBox Lego Paddle | Twilight Meadow Creations Raido | Uberrime Fingo | Best Sex | Cage Sex | Chastity | SpareParts Deuce Harness | RodeoH Harness | Kate’s Bandcamp | Meet Billy | Vote For Us in the AVN Fan Awards!

Credits:

• Music by PROTODOME
• Artwork by amy

Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.

Happy new year! This week we’re discussing some of the big changes we experienced in our sex, kink, and dating lives this past year.
 

How Was 2023? | Sex & Kink Changes | Flure App | New Things We Tried

Credits:

• Music by PROTODOME
• Artwork by amy

Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.

Happy holidays, friends! This week we’re answering listener questions about navigating sex, kink, and relationships around the holidays.
 

Holiday Complaints | Seasonal Roleplays | Hometown Hookup | Long-Distance Relationships | Voice Memos | Pressure-y Grandparent | Polyam Sadness | Holiday Proposals | Gifts We’d Like

Credits:

• Music by PROTODOME
• Artwork by amy

Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.

It can be tricky to determine your sex/kink compatibility with someone you’ve just started flirting with, so this week we’re offering advice on just that.

Favorite Pokémon | Sex Journalist Mode | When & How | Flirting Style | Red Flags | Text vs. In Person | Flexibility | Sex Talk Without Sexting | Questions to Ask | Giving Head | Sex Professionals

Credits:

• Music by PROTODOME
• Artwork by amy

Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.

This week Kate chats with Sage Monroe, a phone sex operator and consultant, about the ups and downs of the phone sex business.
 

Getting Into It | Professional vs. Not | Boundaries & Limits | Self-Care | Financial Domination | Hypnokink | Adult Phone Actress | Authenticity vs. Performativity | Emotional Support | Connections with Clients | Taking Notes | Disability Accommodations | Dating Another Operator | Equipment | Multi-Tasking | Continued Popularity | Personal Sex Life | Power Dynamics | Submissive Operators | “Not Real Sex Work” | Perceptiveness | Keeping It Fresh | Consulting | Suitable Traits

Credits:

• Music by PROTODOME
• Artwork by amy

Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.

Since the month is almost done, this week we’re examining the practice of No Nut November and the community around it.

Unfortunate Origins | Masturbation & Porn Addiction | Intentions | The Rules | Edging | Partners’ Reactions | New Desires | Risk Factors | Funkit Chess Set | The Big Nut | Kate’s Premature Ejaculation Song

Credits:

• Music by PROTODOME
• Artwork by amy

Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.

If your libido’s low right now, you’re not alone. This week we’re talking about periods of diminished sexual desire and what we like to do about them.

Montreal Trip | Out of Practice | Predictable? | Come As You Are by Emily Nagoski | Responsive vs. Spontaneous Desire | Confidence & Competence | Novelty | Mating in Captivity by Esther Perel | Independence | Feeling Bad About It | Non-Monogamy | Different Drives | Meta-Communication | Accepting a Rejection | Reassuring a Partner | Reinvigorating Your Libido | Toys

Credits:

• Music by PROTODOME
• Artwork by amy

Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.

Ever heard of Locktober, the month-long chastity challenge? Kate’s spouse mb recently did it (with Kate as keyholder) and in this episode, the two of them discuss the experience and give advice for potential Locktober newbies.

What is Locktober? | Pandemic Popularity | NoFap & Porn Addiction | Committing To It | Benefits of Longer Lockups | Teasing | Begging | Deviceless Chastity | Finding a Keyholder | Keyholder Motivations | Physical & Psychological Effects | Sexual Touch & Orgasms | Lovense Edge, Gush, & Max | Trust | Coming Without Permission | Locktober Community | Polyamory | Power Circuits by Raven Kaldera | No Nut November | Wet Dreams | Advice for First-Timers | Kink3D Cobra Cage | Irritation & Infections | Benefits | Journaling | Distractibility | Gender | mb’s Hypnovember Tweets

Credits:

• Music by PROTODOME
• Artwork by amy

Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.

Happy Halloween! This week we’re addressing some seasonal sexy inquiries, about fear play, haunted houses, Chewbacca masks, and more.

Turned On By A Costume | Haunted Houses | Mask Safety | Fetish Dreams | Horny 4 Horror | Rickety Bridge Study | Slut-Shaming | Cringey Bloops

Credits:

• Music by PROTODOME
• Artwork by amy

Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.

This week we’re answering listener questions on erotica and fanfiction!

Pearl Necklace Bondage | Finding Kinky & Trans Authors | Heckin’ Lewd | Nerve Endings | Re-Reading | Is Fanfic Just Better? | Influences on Desire | Consent & Safer Sex | Ella Dawson Essay | Content Notes | Moaning & Dirty Talk

Credits:

• Music by PROTODOME
• Artwork by amy

Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.

This week we’re discussing our current relationships to erotica and fanfiction, since Kate just had a story published in Rachel Kramer Bussel’s new erotica anthology Sexy Strangers!
 

Erotica vs. Real Life | Erotica vs. Porn | Non-Erotic Fanfic | (Not) Getting Paid | Fix-It Fics | Finding Stories | Picking Kinks for Characters | Hypno Stories | Dirty Talk & Sexting | Flirting | Psychological Turn-Ons | Fantastical & Supernatural | Omegaverse | Pet Peeves

Credits:

• Music by PROTODOME
• Artwork by amy

Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.

We’re back to talk about polyamory boundary violations some more this week.
 

Cuckolding | Whose Responsibility Is It? | Downstairs DJ’s No Nut November Coin | Kink Rituals | Resentment | Partner Pursues Your Crushes | Fantasizing

Credits:

• Music by PROTODOME
• Artwork by amy

Become a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.