The Resilient Caregiver Podcast

As caregivers, we crave good resources. But they can be so hard to find. Fortunately, there are amazing human beings who help us succeed by sharing their amazing and powerful gifts with us.

In this episode, we spent some time with the amazing, and the the lovely Terria Roushun from the Hair Essentials Company. You will love this conversation as the crew discusses how to provide the best care possible for your child's hair.

A Little More About Terria...

Terria Roushun is the CEO and Director of The Hair Essentials Company. Terria has established herself as a veteran in the hair and makeup industry with over 25 years of experience as a licensed cosmetologist, freelance beauty artist and textured hair expert.

Terria has a keen eye for trend looks and her hand perfecting skill has afforded her the opportunity to work with several prestige brands and agencies in New York, Los Angeles, and in the Chicagoland area. More recently she began to help the transracial adoptive and foster community overcome the anxiety of dealing with highly textured hair. Hair Essentials Company is designed specifically with that community in mind.

From a young age it was instilled in Terria to use her gifts to serve others. Throughout her formative years she always kept that notion in the back of her mind, what are my gifts and how can they help others? Today, Terria is celebrated for spreading positivity, empowering families and turning trend looks into everyday fashions.

Now Terria is expanding from one-on-one sessions to sharing her signature methods to help as many transracial adoptive and foster families gain confidence, skills, knowledge and support for their child’s textured hair.

How To Connect With Terria...

• Visit Terria's Website
• Follow Terria on Instagram
• Check out Terria's Mini-Course

Also On The Show...

• Dads! Join us in the mountains of Colorado THIS October for Road Trip! Learn More

Thanks for stopping by this week ;-)

Gaelin Elmore found himself in 25 different foster homes, over 13 years as a youngster. Fortunately for him, a kind and caring football coach brought him into his home while he finished high school. Through that turn of events, he received the resources he needed to thrive as he transitioned into adulthood. But so many children do not have the same fortune as Gaelin did. Now, in his adult life, he's on a mission to speak truth into the foster care system, and enact change that will ultimately transform the lives of thousands of vulnerable foster youth.

A little more about Gaelin...

Gaelin Elmore spent 13 years in foster care without being adopted. He stayed in over 25 different homes, before living with his high school football coach to finish high school. While in care, Gaelin was abused, and his mom was manipulated to give up parental rights. Now he speaks and uses his story and experiences to educate people on ways to better serve foster youth, and care for disadvantaged communities.

After high school, Gaelin played college football for the University of Minnesota and East Carolina University. He also played professional football for the Cincinnati Bengals. He is married and has a daughter.

How to connect with Gaelin...

• Follow Gaelin on Instagram
• Connect with Gaelin on Facebook
• Visit Gaelin's website

Thanks for stopping by this week ;-) 

Where can caregivers go to find connection, camaraderie, inspiration and hope? We're glad you asked!

Registration is open for one of our favorite in-person conference for caregivers, The Replanted Conference. It's happening October 12-14, 2023 in Naperville, Illinois and it's a must-attend event. 

We only endorse and recommend a handful of conferences each year and Replanted is one of them. This episode is a recording we did live during the 2022 Replanted Conference. 

Replanted Conference 2023 is open for registration...

• Register now for Replanted 2023. This year the conference features speakers Dr. Ira Chasnoff, Jason Johnson, Cindy Lee, and more. Click Here to learn more!

Thanks for stopping by this week!

The adoption and foster journey can be difficult for our children. Feelings of loss, grief and abandonment can move in and take up residence in their hearts and minds. Fortunately, there are voices of hope clearing the way for understanding and transformation. 

Don Brushaber is one of those voices. As an adult adoptee he had lived a lot of life before feelings of abandonment began to stir in him. Just a few short years ago he found himself in the middle of a nervous breakdown. But from that, he was able to come to terms with the loss and abandonment he felt at a young age. He reconnected with his birth parents and began a journey of transformation and healing. 

His story will inspire you but, most importantly, give you insights into helping your own children navigate similar feelings as he had to navigate. 

If you would like to ask Don a question, send us an email to hello@honestlyadoption.com.

Thanks for stopping by this week :-) 

Behaviors can be so hard to handle. Especially when you are overwhelmed and tired. But behaviors are telling us an important story that can help us reframe our entire approach to our children. 

Where do we begin? 

The first step is to understand trauma's impact. The second is to learn how trauma's impact dictates present behavior. 

In this episode we're sharing the audio from our free workshop this week, The Trauma Knowledge Transformation (which you can still sign up for and catch the replays). 

Click Here to sign up for The Trauma Knowledge Transformation workshop. 

Also, our online course and coaching program, Trauma Knowledge Masterclass is open for public enrollment. Learn how you can get access to 8 weeks of group or personal 1:1 coaching with Mike and Kristin. Click Here!

Thanks for stopping by this week ;-) 

Sometimes it's hard to see past the behaviors and into the heart of what's really going on with your child. But once you discover this powerful parenting tool, your journey transforms! 

We get it. Trust us on this one. In our 20+ years of parenting, and parenting children with a trauma history, and special needs, the struggle has been real. We did a lot of things wrong in our parenting in the early days. One of those 'things' was often viewing behavior as simply 'bad behavior' from a child who just wanted to be bad, and not as a voice trying to tell us something deeper. 

When we discovered that behavior was actually a windown into a much bigger story of what had happened to our children, and what was happening with our children, our perspective changed. We now how the parenting tools to frame their behavior in the correct context. And that, in turn, helped us replace contempt with compassion. 

In this episode, we dive into that transformation and share a big update on an upcoming live event we are hosting that will help you gain the same tools that changed everything for us. Keep reading. 

• Join The Trauma Knowledge Transformation Workshop, LIVE this coming week! Beginning Monday, June 19th we are kicking off our FREE 3-Part Live workshop that will help you gain a new perspective on your child's trauma, behaviors, and needs. We're calling this the transformation because, well, that's precisely what happens for you when you learn these valuable tools. It's free to join but space is filling up fast. Click Here to save your spot! 

Thanks for stopping by this week ;-) 

Saying no, not right now, setting boundaries, or emphasizing consequences are all part of the parenting journey. Even the foster and adoptive parenting journey. But there's one aspect of this that often stands at the forefront. 

It's a big question we receive all the time. "I say no to my child, set a boundary, and then the meltdown begins. What can I do?"

It's tricky. No doubt about that. But there are ways to navigate this. In this episode we share Insights and strategies to help you effectively respond to your child when you set a boundary and they become triggered. 

Also On The Show....

• Thrive Coaching has a few open spots! If you are looking for one-to-one attention and support from us, sign up for one of our few remaining spots to our 90-Day coaching program. Click Here.

Thanks for stopping by this week ;-) 

At any given moment on the foster and adoption caregiver journey, we can find ourselves in crisis. How you respond, and the plan you put in place, can change everything! 

We in no way want to freak you out, but having a plan is crucial to successfully navigating these tricky waters. 

In this episode we share a recent session we taught on responding to, managing, and navigating through crisis in your home. 

Also On The Show...

• Get our Behavior Response Blueprint here.
• Download our Trauma Knowledge Guide + Video here

Thanks for stopping by this week ;-) 

It's a tricky thing to deal with. Boundaries. Where's the balance between connected parenting and boundary setting? In this episode we have an open discussion around this. 

As caregivers we can often feel taken advantage of, walked on, and just plain used. Our children don't necessarily mean to do this, but, as a product of their trauma history, that "taking" nature is a survival tactic.

How do you set up, and maintain, healthy boundaries with a child who may, or may not, understand them? 

That's what we discuss in this episode! 

Thanks for stopping by this week ;-) 

Out of all the great resources we have at our disposal as caregivers, there are a few that stand out among the rest. We must learn to listen to them. 

Our children. Adult adoptees. Former foster youth. And birth parents. Those who have experienced the journey first hand have a wealth of knowledge to share with us, to help us become the best caregivers possible. 

The best thing we can do is open up our hearts, and minds, and ears, and listen deeply to their voices and hearts. In this episode, Kristin and Nicole explore what that looks like.

Also on the show...

• Insight Virtual Conference 2023 replays are still available and will be until May 15th. Click here to get access to more than 15 hours of training PLUS in-depth valuable resources! 

Thanks for stopping by this week :-) 

There is so much unnecessary fears and misunderstandings surrounding birth parents and birth families. In this episode, we're working to clear it up.

Last week we were grateful and honored to have the amazing and wonderful Ashley Mitchell join us for Insight Virtual Conference 2023. The Q&A portion of her session was so moving and powerful that we knew we had to make it a stand-alone podcast episode. 

In this episode, Mike and Ashley spend time clearing up unwarranted fears, the truth about extended family, how to set up boundaries with birth parents who aren't in a healthy place, and much more. It's fun, colorful, and insightful. You will love Ashley's heart! 

A Little More About Ashley...

Ashley Mitchell, owner of Big Tough Girl and Founder + Executive Director of Lifetime Healing Foundation, set out to seek increased care, understanding, and resources for birth mothers.  For over a decade, Ashley has been one of the most consistent and sought after birth mother voices in the nation.  Well known for her vulnerability and transparency in adoption, her story has touched the hearts of countless members of the adoption community and beyond.

How To Connect With Ashley...

• Follow her on Instagram
• Check out Ashley's website
• Learn about Lifetime Healing Foundation
  
  

You can still get access to the Insight Virtual Conference 2023 replays and take home more than 15 hours of amazing and indepth training content! Click Here.

Thanks for stopping by this week ;-) 

On the journey of healing and fostering healthy attachments, we must be tuned in to the needs our children have. But also our responsbility as caregivers. How do we pinpoint both? 

We're fortunate to be connected to brilliant minds, and hearts, like our good friend Deborah Gray, who is a licensed clinical social worker, and known worldwide as the attachment guru. 

In this episode we're sharing the replay of a session Deborah hosted during the 2021 Insight Virtual Conference (because the 2023 conference is coming THIS week!). 

A Little More About Deborah...

• Deborah has a lifetime achievement award in 2015 from ATTACh, and was a Henry Meier Practitioner in Residence at the U of WA. She treats children and families in a specialty practice focused on trauma, attachment, grief, and parenting support. She was core faculty for the Portland State University Foster Care and Adoption Therapy Program. She is the author of the Attachment-Trauma Focused Therapy Program, now in partnership with The Honestly Adoption Company and 1MillionHome, and presented through Honestly Adoption University. Deborah authored: Promoting Healthy Attachments; Attaching through Love, Hugs, and Play; Nurturing Adoptions; and Attaching in Adoption. She co-authored Games and Activities for Attaching with Your Child.

Also On The Show...

• Insight Virtual Conference 2023 is coming THIS Thursday and Friday, April 20th and 21st. There's still time to grab your ticket and get more than 15 hours of amazing insight, education, and connection to other caregivers like you. Early Bird registration closes at 11:59pm PST this Wednesday, April 19th. At-the-door tickets will be available after that for a higher price. Lock in your early bird spot now. Click Here!

Thanks for stopping by this week ;-) 

Is there any way to successfully communicate my child's needs to a medical professional that helps me get results? Big question! 

Navigating our children's special needs on a daily basis is hard. But what makes the journey even harder is feeling unheard and unseen in a medical or therapeutic provider's office. We've all had that figurative (or maybe literal) door slammed in our face. We've felt dismissed, disregarded, and just plain stupid. 

What if we told you there was an effective, and practical, way to successufully communicate your child's needs to providers that got results? 

There is. That's why we're excited to welcome Maureen Peterson to The Honestly Adoption Podcast. She's a medical professional but also the parent of a child with chronic illness. She knows the ins and outs of communication from both the professional and parental side of things. And she's here today to share her expertise with us!

A Little More About Maureen...

In her own words... "As a general pediatrician and allergist/immunologist, I have spent my career caring for patients with a variety of acute and chronic health problems. I am a military veteran and mother of three amazing children. I have first-hand experience with being a parent of a child with long-term health issues. Through my own journey, I have learned that to enjoy the life that I was given even if it wasn't the life I had planned. I became a certified life coach to teach parents how to build self-confidence and decrease overwhelming emotions creating a calm, meaningful life."

How To Connect With Maureen...

• Get her Quick-Start Advocacy Checklist here
• Follow her on Instagram
• Connect with her on Facebook

Also On The Show...

• Insight Virtual Conference is coming soon! We're less than 2 weeks away from this exciting conference kicking off featuring over 15 hours of training content, PLUS access to world-renowned thought leaders and trainers. Click Here to learn more!

Thanks for stopping by this week ;-) 

The title of this podcast episode likely prompts a reaction from anyone reading it. After all, the hardships of this journey take quite the toll on us. How do you find the strength and insight to regain compassion for your child? 

If you're asking these questions, you're not alone. In fact, this makes you normal. But there is hope. More importanly, there is a term for the loss of compassion: Blocked Care. 

On this episode, we've invited our two good friends, Lisa Qualls and Melissa Corkum, our go-to experts on this complex topic, to share insights but also truths from their new book Reclaim Compassion: The Adoptive Parent's Guide to Overcoming Blocked Care With Neuroscience & Faith. 

About Lisa and Melissa: 

Lisa C. Qualls and Melissa Corkum serve thousands of adoptive parents by providing post-adoption support through their podcast, books, speaking, and coaching.

How To Connect With Lisa and Melissa: 

• Visit their website
• Follow them on Instagram
• Buy the book

Also On The Show: 

• Insight Virtual Conference is coming soon! Get free access to our latest round of Fast-Action Bonuses when you register by April 1st! Click Here to learn more!

Thanks for stopping by this week ;-) 

The FASD journey can be very defeating and very frustrating. Mostly because, we are constantly dismissed by providers, or made to feel like we're a bit crazy when we try to get answers. How do you break through this? 

We're glad you're here for this episode as we dive into the topic of advocacy, especially as it relates to parenting a child with a Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder (FASD). 

We're joined by Laura Hernandez, from Mama Systems, who is an adoptive mama, but also the caregiver to children on the spectrum. She knows first hand what it looks like and feels like to be dismissed, but she also shares some valuable insight we can. take home as caregivers, when it comes to advocacy! 

How To Connect With Laura: 

• Get her FREE resource (especially for being a listener of this show!). Click Here! 
• Connect with her on Facebook
• Follow her on Instagram

Also On The Show...

• Insight Virtual Conference is coming soon! Get free access to our latest round of Fast-Action Bonuses when you register by April 1st! Click Here to learn more!

Thanks for stopping by this week ;-) 

The caregiver journey is hard and full of challenges. We hear words like resiliency and we often get the wrong idea. What does that really mean? 

It's not what you think. Resiliency is not perfection, it's not about never failing, and on the days you don't feel like you're not resilient, it's not what defines you. 

So then, what does it mean to be resilient? 

In this latest episode of The Honestly Adoption Podcast, Mike explores what resiliency is and is NOT. 

Also on the show...

• Catch our ENCORE presentation of the FREE training, How To Effectively Respond To Behaviors coming THIS Tuesday, March 21st at 1pm EST. Click Here to learn more! 
  
  
• Insight Virtual Conference 2023 is coming soon and with it, BRAND NEW FAST-ACTION BONUSES when you grab your ticket by April 1st! Click Here to register now

Thanks for stopping by this week ;-) 

From the memorable quotes, to the "ah-ha" moments, to the tears, to the on-camera dancing....the dancing....oh the dancing! Insight Virtual Conference 2022 was one for the history books.

And now...we get to do it all over again! That's right...Insight Virtual Conference 2023 is open for registration and coming April 20th and 21st. 

In this special Honestly Adoption Podcast Episode, we are recapping the entire 2022 conference by sharing audio clips from just about everything that happened at the conference. The great news? It doesn't just have to stay in this podcast! Nope. You can get your ticket to the 2023 conference now and get access to our Fast-Action Bonuses...

• Full access to our University training library ($4997 value)
• A complimentary ticket to our brand new Insight After Party on night 1 of the conference

Plus, you'll receive...

• More than 15 hours of training (or 15+ hours of Continuing Education Credit if you're a professional) from world-renowned speakers, authors and thought leaders in the foster and adoption space. 
• Access to our conference Virtual Lobby where we feature a ton of free resources and speaker info
• The opportunity to learn from the brightest and best minds and speakers in the foster and adoptive community

Check out this special episode, and grab your Insight 2023 Ticket now! Click Here.

Thanks for stopping by this week ;-) 

As caregivers, we often carry around immense feelings of guilt from something we said, or did. How do we face these feelings, let alone overcome them?

It's a question all of us have had at one time or another. And what's even more difficult is that we have to keep on parenting and caring for our children, while carrying this burden. It's not like we can retreat away and find healing. 

In our latest episode, Mike shares some ideas and insights into this question from a place of honesty and vulnerablity. 

Also On The Show...

• INSIGHT VIRTUAL CONFERENCE 2023 registration Is opening THIS MONDAY, February 27th! And when we open everything up we have some amazing fast-action bonuses teed up for you. This year's conference is going to be transformational. Get on our email update list here and be the first to hear about our fast-action bonus bundles! 

Thanks for stopping by this week ;-) 

While it may be hard to see and understand, our bodies are super computers that capture and hold data for years. This has never been more the case, then with our child's trauma history. 

You've probably found yourself scratching your head a time or two, or simply throwing your hands up in confusion, when the child who has been in your home for years is melting down for no apparent reason. Or, perhaps you've been caught off guard by a season where your child, who seemed fine for a long time, suddenly begins to act out, or behave in extreme ways.

There's a simple explanation for this: the body keeps score of everything traumatic experience (acute or chronic) that a human being has gone through in their life. When you consider this reality as it relates to our children, who have experienced significant trauma, everything begins to make sense.

In this episode, Mike shares a simple understanding of this reality.

Also On The Show...

• Insight Virtual Conference is coming April 20th & 21st to a computer, tablet, or smartphone near you. When we open up registration in just a little over a week, we're giving away some magnificent bonuses. The best place you can be to qualify for this is on our email update list! Click Here to add your name!

Thanks for stopping by this week ;-)

One of the most confusing and overwhelming aspects of the foster and adoption journey, is trying to make sense of behaviors that come from trauma. Where do you even begin? 

Let's be honest...

Trying to make sense of our child's behavior, let alone manage it (or stop it), is like climbing Mt Everest!

Nearly impossible....or so it seems!

What if we told you there was a simple, effective way to understand and respond to your child's behaviors in a way that brings calm in the middle of chaos?

If you're nodding your head yes, we have good news!

In this episode we're sharing the first half of an online training Mike hosted entitled, How To Effectively Respond To Your Child's Behaviors: A 4-Part Blueprint To Bring Calm to The Chaos.

In this free training, he walks you through:

• The #1 most important step to effective behavior response
• A proven, 4-part response blueprint that is easy to apply
• Done-for-you scripts you can use when your child is dysregulated
• The mental shift caregivers can make that changes everything!

The training is free to join in and you can catch the full replay now until 11:59 pm PST on February 15th.

Click Here to access the entire training replay!

Thanks for stopping by this week ;-) 

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