Those Who Can't Watch, Listen

🎵 Shake, shake, shake! Shake, shake, shake! Shake your camera! For this horror movie. Yeah! 🎵 Welcome to this week's episode about THE BLAIR WITCH PROJECT, the documentary-style horror movie that spurred many other documentary-style horror movies. Faux-umentary? We don't know, but listen in to find out what happened - or didn't happen - in the woods in this 90s classic.

Thanks for listening! (Or not!)

Top o' the mornin' to ya! We're coming at you with a St. Patrick's Day episode in April, but you know what? The spirit of St. Patrick lives on all year long. Check out this episode to find out how Jennifer Aniston got her start as a bratty Valley girl as well as how Warwick Davis killed (literally) his role of the Leprechaun. Is this movie good? No. But was it worth the watch? Also no. JUST KIDDING. It was delightful. Thanks for listening! Or not!

Hello! Can you see us? It's time for another episode of "Those Who Can't Watch, Listen"! Elizabeth Moss plays the part of a terrified ex-girlfriend whose boyfriend may or may not be haunting her after his suicide. Or is he invisible? You'll have to listen (or not) to find out!!

Have you ever wondered if death was coming for you because you were supposed to die in a fiery plane crash? No? Just these late 90s/early 00s teens in this week's movie, "Final Destination"?

Listen in to hear about the movie that scarred many of us elder millennials for life around things like bathtubs, train tracks, and bad art in a garage.

Thanks for listening! (Or not!) 

GUESS WHAT! We got NEW MICS, and WOW, do we ever sound better. Tune in this week to hear us sound crisp and profesh talking about the Freaky Friday-esque horror movie "Freaky" starring Vince Vaughn and Kathryn Newton. Were you ever wondering, wow, what would it be like if a serial killer swapped bodies with a teenage girl? Then this is the movie for you! Thanks for listening (OR NOT!) 

WE'RE BAAAAAAAACK!! (Think of this as the quote from "The Poltergeist," episode 15 of this podcast if you need a reference.)

Blah blah, we could lament why we haven't been posting podcast episodes, but we ALL know why. Life has just been TOO fun with Covid.

Enjoy this episode of Kurt Russell's masterpiece - THE THING! 

Hola! We're coming at you today with a short but sweet-ish episode about a crying lady ("La Llorona" in Spanish! Hence the title!) who killed her kids. YIKES. Listen in to see why she keeps cryin' after that. Thanks for listening! Or not!

We're back! Holiday break is finally over, and we have a new episode just in time for Bong Joon Ho's HISTORIC Oscar win. Is "Parasite" a horror movie? Depends on how you feel about rich people, I guess. 

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Don’t “sleep” on this one, listeners-or-nots! Stephen King’s novel-turned-movie “Doctor Sleep” was a WINNER in both Angie AND Kelsey’s book(s). When you combine Ewan McGregor with some telepathy and old hotels, you have a great, spooky, heartfelt movie (with special thanks to the director, Mike Flanagan). Are you a kid who has special powers? Then WATCH OUT for Rose the Hat and listen to this episode to learn how to defeat her! Or just listen so you can have a quick lil summary of an amazing Stephen King adaptation. It might not be like the book really at all, but it sure is great.

Thanks for listening! Or not!

Listen (or not), we know it's not Halloween anymore. Life happens, time flies, all that jazz. But if you still want to hear about Jamie Lee Curtis' debut movie with Michael Myers (not THAT Michael Myers), then listen in even if it is post-Halloween. Do do do do (that's us singing the theme).

Thanks for listening! (Or not!)

**Little bit of an audio issue in this and it got reposted -- sorry!**

WHOA BABY, this week's episode is all about Mia Farrow's masterpiece (we refuse to acknowledge the RP name) "Rosemary's Baby." Angie had never seen it before, but MAN, what a treat. Listen in to hear about how one woman's weirdo neighbors gaslit her into thinking she was insane and definitely not living next door to a satanic cult! Kind of typical! Is Rosemary insane, tho? Maybe. Is the dad from "Beethoven" in this movie? Yes!

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Hi!

Were you that girl in high school that everyone made fun of and threw tampons at you when you got your period in the gym shower? Then this movie's for YOU! Angie's future mother-in-law showed "Carrie" to her daughter as as lesson to "never be mean to people because you never know what could happen" and you know, we think she was right. No bullying, because you never know if someone has telekinesis and can start fires with her mind! Life lesson #451.

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Hi! Are you jealous of everyone who seems to know everything about clowns, spiders, and red balloons? Then this episode is for you! Learn about Pennywise the Clown, his legacy (sort of), and the Losers Club. Get ready for IT CHAPTER TWO! With a small appearance by IT CHAPTER ONE! Was it called chapter one? Anyway, it's a recap of IT from 2017. 

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Who wants a summary of the Scary(iest) Stories to Tell in the Dark? If you're like Angie, you read those books COVER TO COVER and even hid them under your bed because you were afraid the terrifying illustrations might come to life in the night, right? No, just her? Okay. Listen to see how terribly they transformed this PA town to the (sort of) 1960s and how they interpreted these short stories into something, well, less of a collection of short stories. Guillermo del Toro doesn't disappoint! (Well, maybe it's like 10% disappointing) Yay for quick summaries of horror movies!

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Hello! We all know Mel Gibson is terrible, but honestly, let's just forget that for a good hour and hear about how everything's connected in M. Night Shyamalan's "Signs." It's a great movie and Angie might cry while retelling the story of Joaquin Phoenix, MG, Abigail Breslin, and Rory Culkin + aliens. Or are they aliens? (They're aliens.)

Swing away, Merrill. Thanks for listening! (Or not!)

Hello, Clarice! That’s a line from this week’s movie, “The Silence of the Lambs” - which you most likely won’t learn from listening to this episode, so that’s *bonus content*. Have you wondered why everyone thinks this is the best movie ever? You should really just go watch it to hear all the goods about Hannibal Lector, Buffalo Bill, and Clarice Starling - but if you can’t watch, listen!

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We've all heard the superstition. WATCH YOUR BACKS, FRIDAY THE 13TH episode is here! If Angie was smart, she would've waited to do this movie on the actual Friday the 13th that is happening in September, but alas, you're getting it in August. On the 15th. So. You're welcome. Are you interested in campy (literally and figuratively) horror? Then this is the episode for you! Listen in to hear about Kevin Bacon's acting debut (maybe?) and get a synopsis of the first movie in a franchise that has grossed a grotesque amount of money.

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Welcome to another episode of Those Who Can't Watch, Listen! This week we discuss Alfred Hitchcock's "Psycho." Norman Bates is no match for...well, his mother? Don't worry, we did the OG "Psycho" - no Vince Vaughn/Anne Heche action over here! 

See ya at the Bates Motel! Thanks for listening! (Or not!) 

Helloooo! This week's episode is "The Cabin in the Woods"! Chris Hemsworth, Jesse Williams, the girl from "Firefly," the dad from "Step Brothers," the awful guy from "Billy Madison." What else do you need in a horror movie? Oh yeah, and it's written by Joss Whedon!

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Hello! Are you ready for the horror movie of the summer? MIDSOMMAR! Join Kelsey and Angie for a journey to Sweden for a Summer Solstice festival gone wrong - or did it? (No, it definitely went very, very wrong.) We talk about Heaven's Gate, Chidi from "The Good Place," and horrific deaths in this episode. In addition, Ari Aster sure likes to show us (let us hear about, in this podcast's case) some naked people chanting, as well - so buckle up, listeners-or-nots!

Thanks for listening! (Or not!)