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    become podcast

    Explore "become podcast" with insightful episodes like "Ep.86 The Unstoppable Heart - Boots Knighton's Tale of Survival and Renewal", "Ep.83 Foundation of Excellence - Healing Inner Generational Trauma", "Ep.80 How To Protect Your Assets - Why it's important for your financial future", "Ep.76 Breaking Patterns with Derick Johnson: A Story of Faith, Fitness, and Flourishings" and "Ep.75 The Surgeon Who Said No to Surgery: Dr. Doug Lucas's Mission for Optimal Bone Health" from podcasts like ""BECOME", "BECOME", "BECOME", "BECOME" and "BECOME"" and more!

    Episodes (18)

    Ep.86 The Unstoppable Heart - Boots Knighton's Tale of Survival and Renewal

    Ep.86 The Unstoppable Heart - Boots Knighton's Tale of Survival and Renewal

    A traumatic brain injury on the ski slopes became the unlikely catalyst for Boots Knighton's extraordinary journey of open-heart surgery and self-discovery. Tune in to hear a story of resilience that redefines adversity. Boots Knighton shares the profound lessons learned from battling congenital heart defects and how January 15, 2021, transformed from a day of surgery to the best day of her life. Learn how challenges can lead to a renewed appreciation for life.

    Connect with Boots:

    https://www.theheartchamberpodcast.com/

     

    Connect with Sabine Kvenberg: 

    Sabine Kvenberg Resources 

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    Ep.83 Foundation of Excellence - Healing Inner Generational Trauma

    Ep.83 Foundation of Excellence - Healing Inner Generational Trauma

    As a teenager, I told my dad to leave my life. It wasn't until 13 years later we reconnected. Over that time, I struggled with my purpose, worth, perfectionism, and workaholism. I went from relationship to relationship and sought affirmation and significance in my career. That struggle has provided a helping of wisdom, discernment, and insight into life.

    Katherine shares her experience and insights in a raw and down-to-earth conversation. She shares why healing intergenerational trauma matters. 

    Her Leon Foundation of Excellence, helps young people heal intergenerational patterns of poverty, trauma, and abuse, empowering them to gain leadership skills and live a life of excellence.

    https://www.instagram.com/leonyouth/

    https://www.linkedin.com/in/opportunitymade/

    www.leonfe.org

    https://leonfoundation.thinkific.com/

     

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    Ep.80 How To Protect Your Assets - Why it's important for your financial future

    Ep.80 How To Protect Your Assets - Why it's important for your financial future

    In this episode, we discuss how to protect your or your family’s assets from a legal point of view. Scherrie Prince went to law school because of her personal and business setbacks due to not having a written contract, will, or trust in place. She is sharing her story of family feuds and failed businesses.

    In her own words, “Asset Protection is not only a financial strategy, but also a profoundly personal mission.

    Legal Strategies for Entrepreneurs

    1. have a plan
    2. the right entity
    3. make sure you are not undercapitalized (cashflow)

    Get in touch with Scherrie:

    https://scherrieprince.com/

    https://www.linkedin.com/in/scherriespeaks/

     

    Want to support this podcast? Every donation of $50 plus will get a personal autographed book.

    Click here: https://www.podpage.com/become/support/ 

     

    Stay connected with Sabine

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    Ep.76 Breaking Patterns with Derick Johnson: A Story of Faith, Fitness, and Flourishings

    Ep.76 Breaking Patterns with Derick Johnson: A Story of Faith, Fitness, and Flourishings

    In this compelling episode, we explore the multifaceted life of Derick Johnson, a distinguished US Army Veteran, Life Coach, and Trainer. Derick, who has assisted over 500 clients and 50 companies, shares his journey from mere survival to a thriving life through his unique coaching modalities and effective marketing strategies.

    As a thrice-awarded Soldier of the Year, Derick has utilized his leadership skills, certifications, and rich life experiences to guide others in mastering their minds and bodies. His commitment to helping people thrive is rooted deeply in his personal story of resilience and transformation.

    Growing up as a mixed-race individual, Derick faced numerous challenges. He candidly discusses the complexities of his heritage, with a German mother and African American father, and how this shaped his perspective. He also delves into his transformative healing experience in Peru and the profound impact of his global travels with his girlfriend.

    Central to Derick's story is the role of fitness and faith in his life. He recounts how these elements were crucial in turning a potentially destructive path into a successful career and fulfilling life. This personal evolution led to the creation of "Fit With Derick," a high-performance coaching business focused on helping individuals break old patterns and thrive.

    The episode also sheds light on Derick's turbulent childhood, marked by the success of his parents who struggled with alcoholism and the personal challenges of bullying and dark times. Derick's story is a testament to the power of resilience, showing how fitness and faith can be transformative forces in overcoming adversity.

    Listeners will find inspiration in Derick's journey, gaining insights into how to navigate life's challenges with strength and grace.

    Ep.75 The Surgeon Who Said No to Surgery: Dr. Doug Lucas's Mission for Optimal Bone Health

    Ep.75 The Surgeon Who Said No to Surgery:   Dr. Doug Lucas's Mission for Optimal Bone Health

    In this insightful episode, I had the privilege of hosting Dr. Doug Lucas, an individual whose career trajectory is as impressive as it is diverse. He has transitioned from being a professional ballet dancer to an orthopedic surgeon, and now to a pioneering entrepreneur with a mission to transform healthcare approaches.

    Our conversation centered on the critical role of nutrition and prevention in maintaining bone health and avoiding surgery. He shared his personal journey, revealing the challenges and rewards of leaving a secure, well-paid position as a surgeon to pursue his entrepreneurial aspirations. His commitment to this path is fueled by a deep passion and purpose – to educate and assist people in preventing the very surgeries he was trained to perform.

    A significant part of our discussion was dedicated to Dr. Doug's critique of the traditional healthcare model and how his company, Optimal Bone Health, is leading a paradigm shift towards more proactive and preventative measures.

    Moreover, we ventured into the realm of artificial intelligence, engaging in a thought-provoking conversation about the pros and cons of tools like ChatGPT for research and information dissemination. Dr. Doug’s insights on this topic were particularly enlightening, considering the evolving landscape of technology in healthcare.

    Get in touch with Dr. Doug

    https://www.optimalbonehealth.com/

    https://www.instagram.com/dr_douglucas/ 

     

    Learn more about Lifewave X39: 

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    Ep.74 Unveiling the Shadows: Overcoming P#&^ Addiction with J.K. Emezi

    Ep.74 Unveiling the Shadows: Overcoming P#&^ Addiction with J.K. Emezi

    In a revealing and urgent edition of our podcast, we dive into a compelling discussion with J.K. Emezi, a figure of transformation in the realm of addiction recovery. This extended episode sheds light on the often-shadowed topic of porn addiction and its escalating prevalence. With raw honesty, J.K. details the profound impact this addiction has on both individuals and the larger societal web, including its unsettling ties to human trafficking.

    As we unravel the conversation, J.K. doesn't just recount his own victory over a decade-long struggle with addiction; he also lays out the roadmap of his innovative Reboot System. This is more than a personal narrative; it's an exploration of a societal challenge, a battle cry for awareness, and a beacon of hope for those ensnared.

    J.K.'s credentials as a Certified Addiction Coach and CEO of Elevated Recovery underscore the depth of his knowledge and the success of his approach. His system isn't just theory—it's a practiced and effective method that has redefined the lives of professionals across the globe.

    This episode is a call to awareness and action. We confront the stark realities of addiction, the power it can hold over one's life, and the ripple effect on relationships and society. But more than that, we spotlight the potential for recovery and the actionable steps towards a life reclaimed.

    Join us as we navigate this delicate topic, guided by an expert who has not only walked through the fire of addiction but has turned back to light the way for others. It's a conversation that's as much about confronting harsh truths as it is about embracing the potential for change and recovery.

    Key Takeaways:

    • P#&^ addiction is a pressing issue with far-reaching effects, including its influence on human trafficking.
    • Awareness is the crucial first step towards addressing and ultimately overcoming addiction.
    • His Reboot System is a testament to J.K. Emezi's personal and professional commitment to helping others achieve lasting recovery.
    • Recovery is about ending addiction, personal growth, and improving one's quality of life.

    How to get involved and help against Human Trafficking:

    Operation Underground Railroad: https://ourrescue.org/ 

    Thorn: https://www.thorn.org/ 

     

    Contact:

    Website: www.elevatedrecovery.org 

    Social Media 

     

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    Ep.73 Become More - Be Useful

    Ep.73 Become More - Be Useful

    When we become more, we can do more and will have more. I recently read Arnold Schwarzenegger's new Book "Be Useful". In this episode, I bring you the summary and takeaways from the 7 tools for life that he shares. Applying them can help you become your next greater self. 

    We have to become the person we are meant to be to live the life we are destined to live! 

    Below are a few links that can help you along the way.

    Get more insights and watch the full video version of my podcast on YouTube:

    https://www.youtube.com/sabinekvenberg

     

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    Ep.72 Turning Adversity into Authority - From broke mom to millionaire in 18 months

    Ep.72 Turning Adversity into Authority - From broke mom to millionaire in 18 months

    Beate’s entrepreneurial journey is a crazy transition from being a broke single mom and immigrant who was $135,000 in debt to cracking the code and then selling her business to Bill Gates for millions during a prolonged recession. A letter from the White House gave Beate the encouragement and resources to start her quest.

    Besides listening to an inspiring journey you will learn what it takes to turn things around.

    Learn more and take the quiz: https://beatechelette.com/

    Please take a minute and write a review: BECOME Podpage

     

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    Ep.64 Locked-up in China - My Experience In A Beijing Prison

    Ep.64 Locked-up in China - My Experience In A Beijing Prison

    As a former football player, Chancellor relied on his perseverance to get him through imprisonment in Beijing. This experience changed his way of living and gave him a new life perspective. He shares some of the insights that led him to a new road to success. Chancellor is now a role model and beacon of light for many young people in his capacity as a teacher. 

    Get in touch with Chancellor Jackson:

    https://linktr.ee/korleh

    Follow him on Social Media:

    https://www.instagram.com/korlehj/

    https://www.facebook.com/korlehj 

     

     

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    Ep.63 Blindsided By Death - Overcoming The Unthinkable

    Ep.63 Blindsided By Death - Overcoming The Unthinkable

    Explore the concept of transformation and personal growth as Debbie Baisden shares her courageous journey of resilience after facing immense challenges and the grieving process following the unexpected loss of a loved one. Debbie opens up about her struggles with grief and how it deeply affected her role as a mother. She talks about how having children helped her find the fortitude to carry on as a parent and how they inspired her to keep going. Debbie also addressed relying on God moment by moment, the value of personal development and how it may help people overcome obstacles in life.

    Don't miss this captivating story of strength and the transformative power of facing challenges head-on to become the best version of ourselves.

    Connect with Debbie Wilkins Baisden:

    Fit With Deb Website

    Fit With Deb Facebook

    Fit With Deb Instagram

    Momsanity

     

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    Ep.61 Become Your Own Boss - What Are You Waiting For?

    Ep.61 Become Your Own Boss - What Are You Waiting For?

    If you are on the fence about starting your own online business, let me tell you: NOW is the time! In this episode, I will share with you why now and answer the top 5 questions you must ask yourself if you want to start your own business. Knowing the answers to these questions can mean the difference between failure and success.

     

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    Ep.53 The Best of Season 1 - Happy Anniversary Edition

    Ep.53 The Best of Season 1 - Happy Anniversary Edition

    I will share why and how the BECOME podcast was born in this episode. In addition, you will hear some of the most memorable soundbites from some of my guests. You can get a sneak peek of many different stories from Doctors to Athlet Celebrities, Authors, and Tony Robbins Firewalk chief coordinator.

     

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    Hello and welcome to my podcast become. My name is Sabine Kvenberg and I am your host, the content will inspire you to reach your aspirations and become the best version of yourself. I feature interviews with successful individuals from various industries, delving into the personal and professional journey, how they overcame adversities and the strategies they used to achieve their goals. We have to become the person we are meant to be first, so we can live the life we are destined to live. That also means we must overcome challenges and work through difficult times to learn, grow and become the next more fabulous version of ourselves. I'm so glad that you're here. Let's get on this journey together. Hello, and welcome to my special anniversary episode. Yes. A year ago I published the first episode of become and I cannot believe how fast that year went by. It was such a phenomenal experience. having this conversation with all those wonderful guests of mine who shared their struggles, their overcoming of adversity. And coming out on the other side is their next greatest self. And this is what this podcast is all about to show you that you are not alone. There are so many other people who have overcome difficult and challenging times. Even so bad that they were already dead. Some literally and some were dead inside. But no matter what, the human resilience is fantastic. And we all have that within us. And I hope that this podcast will help you explore that more and discover that so that you can thrive and you can become your next greater self. In this episode, I share the highlights of the last year's sound bites from some of the interviews that I conducted that I feel you need to hear one more time because they were just such great pieces of advice. or stories that really touched my heart. And if some of the excerpts speak to you and you want to listen to the entire interview, you can do this because I will announce before each of those little sound bites, which episode number it is. In addition, I will share with you how I came about to start the podcast BECOME. 

    In September of 2021 I sold my business that I had for 27 years a performing arts school and after a few months of adjusting and just relaxing and enjoying my free time. I decided I have to do something more. I cannot just sit at home and do nothing. I have been a coach my whole life and I am also Speaker I enjoy sharing my wisdom my message with a greater audience. So in January of 2022 I was invited as a guest speaker for pod fest here in Orlando, Florida. And during that time, my idea was kindled to start my podcast. I didn't know yet what but I did know that I wanted to make an impact. And then I wanted to share the message of hope, inspiration and motivation. And on one night, I woke up and I was right awake. And this one word came into my mind over and over again. And that word was become we must become the person we are meant to be. So we can live the life we are destined to live and I already started my coaching business. And I coached individuals and helped them to get to that path of becoming their next greatest self. And one of the patterns that I saw over and over again was limiting beliefs. And sadly enough, the notion that they felt they are alone that they found. It's just them and this is far from the truth. There are so many people were struggling with the same things. So with the podcast idea, I thought I want to give people the opportunity to listen to others to know that they are not alone and also listen how others overcame adversities how others overcame challenging situations and literally went into a metamorphosis stage to just break everything down that they know to rebuild everything. To then immerse is there more fabulous self. So here you have it. This was my idea. The idea was born. And June of 2022 I launched my podcast because and I hope you have enjoyed it and if you're listening in for the first time, please continue to listen by subscribing. Every Thursday, I release a new episode and I hope that you will be part of my community. And if you like what you hear, please give us a five star review and write a little review about your experience. We truly appreciate it but without any further ado, let's get into the highlights. The very first episode I recorded was with Dr. Ron Stotts. Now, the sound quality is not the best but the information is really really good. This interview was phenomenal. And that's why I left it in and it is also a reminder you don't have to be great to start, but you have to start to become great. Is there something that someone could do right now, to overcome that?


    One thing you have to appreciate that everything. All the challenges in our lives are created in relationship to other people. And that really is your indicator that to resolve those challenges. resolving those challenges needs to be done in relationship to other people also. So lots of times, if somebody liked me it was really that other person then they'd be more group work and then they expanded into their lives into their more significant relationships but the healing marriage to me is not coming together and having eternal bliss. It's finding somebody who's willing to stand in the fire and unpack the bags together and really, you know, heal all of that fast together


    episode four, Laura, Mark Quist.
    And so after meeting with the endocrinologist doing all the testing and stuff, he's like, Well, you definitely have Hashimotos and that with an autoimmune disease where your body attacks its own thyroid so you can't produce the hormones that you need and your thyroid needs to be imbalanced to get pregnant. And so to do that, we ended up the best program for me it was to use Synthroid to help that get back in balance. And then during that time, I just knew that that wasn't going to be my normal. So I had to start doing some more research in on that to see what other ways can I actually help myself. As a trainer, you you work with a client and they progress in different phases or different chapters and so I had to put my skills to myself, knowing that this is the chapter that I'm in right now and in what I'm training for is like it's not the Olympics. It's the baby birthday. You know, it was kind of my Olympic my own version of the Olympics coming up and so I had to do the things for that preparation.


    Episode Five, Dana Agnellini
    2005 was a pivotal year for me. It was it was the best that life had to offer and the worst all at the same time. And as you were speaking, I never thought of it this way before but I think of let's say, a crab or what are those horseshoe crabs? I think that they change shells. Yes. They have to let go of their old shell to either find one that fits them properly now, or to grow a new one. But the letting go process is just as important as the next step. So I was in this career that was very lucrative with a big, you know, international company and was doing very well. But at the same time I attracted to me a new boss that for some reason or another, just had a problem with me and was trying to work me out in the organization. So that was part of the shell being relieved and at the same time my marriage was disintegrating. I tried to ignore it. We tried for almost 20 years. Because I was never planning on divorcing I had three kids. It just wasn't in my plans. I made myself a promise. I made my family a promise. But the universe knew better. The Universe knew it was time to let that show go.

    Episode 19 Paul Henszel.
    So in the beginning of 2010, I was working as a supervisor in a sawmill. I had to unjam a giant log that got stuck against a giant steel beam. Now these logs that we were cutting are called Cats. They're extremely heavy, and each piece weighs about 1000 pounds. Now we had to manually unjam this log before we could, you know, resume production. So I had to crawl into a very tight, confined space. And when we fried this piece, the chains started while I was still in the machine, and I was being crushed alive by 12,000 pounds of wood. I could hear my body cracking, gurgling and crunching. It literally felt like my head was going to explode. There was so much pressure. And I thought to myself, if this doesn't stop, I'm going to die. I then blacked out now. I was not breathing and without oxygen for about 12 minutes. My coworkers had to perform amazing feats of strength just to rescue me and not time limit. When I was freed everyone thought I was dead. They were just about to perform CPR. And miraculously, I started breathing.

    Episode 22 Jenny Townsend
    At the end of my first year, I finally got everything under one roof. All my teachers were under one roof. We were rocking and rolling. I started hiring more people. And I made a couple bad hires which resulted in me having to work more, more hours more time and we weren't really making any money which was stressful. For me as I'm a goal oriented person. It was stressful for my husband because he's like you're working all these hours and you're not paying yourself. And my response to him was I don't need to be paid. I love what I'm doing. The fact that I get to work my passion every single day and change people's lives was payment enough for me. He never really connected with the mission of my company, which is one of the reasons why we ended up where we were he always supported me in my dream, but he became very resentful, the fact that I wasn't making money and the fact that I was living my dream when he was working a miserable job. So all these different variables led to a massive disaster.

    Episode 27 Chris Krimitsos
    so I had a story to fiction story that I wanted to write that conveyed a message of getting started because of the business group I was part of as well as podcasting and helping people with YouTube and all these different endeavors. I noticed that was a common theme a lot of people where I'll get started when everything's perfect, or I'm not ready yet. And because I've done so many meetings, you wind up seeing patterns over the years in the 1000s of meetings, one pattern you'd see as someone spending two or three years to get ready. Another pattern you see as someone that would start ugly, and then perfect it next thing you know that a hit show a year in or year and a half in. Meanwhile, the other person is still ready, not ready because it's not perfect yet.

    Episode 39 Wally Green
    Why are you angry? Why? You're not in America. You're not in a gang. You're not being abused by your stepfather. You you're not part of any of these things. You're in a different country where people actually like you and they don't like you because you can pick up your gun and protect them. They like you just because you're you. So what that was. I love it. Yeah. And that was that was that right? There was a turning point right there that was like about face change, mindset change. Every kind of change you could think of happened there when I actually realize that not everyone in the world is out to get you. Not everyone in the world hates you. And there are people in this world who genuinely care about you. Just because you are you and not what you can do for them. And that was to change. That was the pivoting the pivoting point the turning point.

    Episode 40 Susan Gold,
    I feel like we need to be brave. We need to stand that and we need to talk about our truth. And it's not so shameful. So many people have had similar experiences, but we keep it all tucked in, especially in the corporate system that's just broken. So I have to say I've been a bit of a trailblazer not knowing it.
    Epic episode 41 Brendon Kumarasamy
    So a few years ago, when I started guesting on podcast, I suck. I was so bad. I remember some guy asked me like, hey Brendon, where does the fear of communication come from? And I was like, what like, I don't know the fear of communication come so like London, Los Angeles, New York City. Like I don't know. So how did I fix this every single day? So I've been for five minutes answered one question that I thought the world would ask you my expertise. But if you do this every single day for a year, you'll have answer 365 questions and you'll people that
    that is a great approach. I have not heard that one. And I heard a lot of answers.

    Episode 42 Victoria Pelletier
    and for me I can very much remember you know being two and three years old and abused by my biological mother. Whether that was got pushed up and downstairs I had teeth that had been impacted as a result of that eat my baby tea. I even to this day, one of my eye drops a little bit lower than the other because I had a cigarette in my eye and I wear a patch for months. So I remembered a lot of it. Those were, you know, ended up being quite formative, even though we would say it's a little bit later in children's lives just because of the trauma that I dealt with.

    Episode 45 Julie Jones,
    you don't often see and it's it's kind of a story of my resilience have to if there's something I really want in life, how I go for it. I don't take no for an answer. I was only the third female hired on by my department, which I really had no trouble with the men that I worked with, with me being female because I proved myself early on when I went out for the SWAT team, believe it or not, I'm six foot tall. At that point, I just didn't have enough upper body strength so I wasn't able to get over the six foot wall. And one of the guys in his infinite wisdom decided to give me a little boost which disqualified me and you know the sergeant that was running the the obstacle course you know, he pulled me on the side. I said, I know I'm disqualified. It's okay. I worked out even harder. I improved my upper body strength the second time because I really wanted to be on the team. The second time that I went out for it. You know, I passed everything with flying colors. I officially got onto the SWAT team on my own

    Episode 47 Dai Manuel.
    I mean it's a journey, right? We hear that term when we reference people in our lives and how we're living them and it is a journey and and yes, I understand it's easy to focus on a destination or have a goal set or to have some intention on where we want to get to. But if we're not really clear on where we're at and how we got there, it's hard to see potentially the connection of who we were to who we are now to who we are intentionally wanting to become. And so believe me I noticed very, very well I've been in a lot of situations where change has not necessarily come easily. In fact, it's been very, very challenging and, and I've been in a few situations in my life where you know, had I not worked through that change and work through being vulnerable enough to ask for help. I don't think we'd be having this conversation today.

    Episode 49, Zach White,
    After you're in that kind of trough place your face is grinding against the floor of rock bottom as it were right. Then you stand up and you start to just put one foot in front of the other. And what I tell everybody who I've coached who's gone through any form of burnout or suffering or a rock bottom experience like this, or if you're going through it right now. You had to bring the time horizon and a little bit. We're not going to solve the whole thing in one move. We're not going to go create the perfect life in one day. Let's zoom way I like to call it drawing smaller circles, rather than solving for the big equation. Let's just solve for this afternoon. What are we going to do this afternoon to make sure it's a little bit better than yesterday to make sure we're not going back to those same patterns or habits that got us stuck in the first place and put one foot in front of the other.

    Episode 50 the firewall with Dave Albin,
    Here's the first thing I learned about Firewalker great lesson great metaphor for life. When you take that first step onto those goals. Oh, you'll take the second, third fourth. I guarantee right. You're not going to stop in the middle of that fire lane. Well, that was it. So
    you did the fire walk and what happened then what changed?
    Well, what changed was, you know again that night it was spectacular. It was one of the most unbelievable experiences of my entire life. And the next day, this is where it really got interesting for me. I'm in the foyer with 3500 people getting ready to go into the venue and I'm looking around so being and I'm watching all these people and they were communicating unlike anything I'd ever been been around. I've never seen or experienced anything like this. They were laughing. They were crying. They were hugging. They were engaging. They were telling their story. It was just like it was like storytime everywhere. 3500 People just were completely transformed the night before.

    Episode 51 The Holly Frances
    And I remember we had to do these trials off the ventilator where I would last for like 15 seconds at a time. They would basically make me breathe on my own and it felt like I was underwater, struggling to breathe about to die. And it was so scary. And I remember crying and hyperventilating and think like, I don't think I'm ever going to be able to do this. I don't believe that I'm ever going to be able to breathe on my own. And something profound that that GBS survivor actually said to me and he actually brought me a sign and he put it above my wall, basically right in front of my bed so I could stare at it. And it was a quote that said courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes it's the quiet voice at days and saying I will try again tomorrow.

    And I finished the first year was an episode about writing a book can propel your success as an expert. And I talked about that becoming an author is easier than you think. So if you ever wondered what it takes to write a book, I definitely invite you to listen to Episode 52. And if there were one or two that stood out and really piqued your interest, you can go and listen to the entire episode. All right, my friend. This was it for today. And as always, I asked you to give us a good rating or a write a quick review, because that always helps with the algorithm on Apple podcast. If you have a question or if you would like to talk about a topic, just put it in the comment section. Or if you would like to see a guest to talk about one specific topic mentioned that as well. Last but not least, I want to give you a heartfelt thank you. Producing a podcast takes time and money and for those of you who are supporting this channel, by your generous donations, I truly truly appreciate it. And if you don't know and you want to contribute to that, you can find a donation button on my page, which is pod page.com forward slash become. But in any case, you can support this channel in so many different ways. Also by giving a great review by writing a review by sharing it that also goes a long way and helps the algorithm once again. Thank you and I look forward to serving you the next season until I see you again always remember we have to become the person we are meant to be first to live the life we ar

     

     

    Ep.51 Living with GBS - From being paralyzed to running again

    Ep.51  Living with GBS - From being paralyzed to running again

    Within 72 hours, she was completely paralyzed from the neck down. She was rushed into the ICU and put on a ventilator. She couldn’t move or talk. That’s when she learned you got GBS. Holly just had her first baby and thought her life was over. She was about to say goodbye when a stranger came to her bedside and brought her a sign. That was the turning point. 

     

    Shownotes: 

     

    It's time for a Lifeline Screening. Click the link below to learn more and to schedule your appointment:

    http://llsa.go2cloud.org/aff_c?offer_id=877&aff_id=1640

     

    In this episode, we discussed: 

    1. What is GBS?
    2. How Holly was touched by a simple gift from a stranger and how she is paying it forward
    3. The Power of Belief can be one of the most powerful tools to heel

     

     

    Connect with Holly Frances:

     

     

    Connect with Sabine Kvenberg: 

    Sabine Kvenberg on Facebook
    Sabine Kvenberg on Instagram

    Sabine Kvenberg on Linkedin

    Sabine Kvenberg on YouTube

    BECOME Podpage

    Sabine Kvenberg Resources

     

    Ep.50 A Fire Walk Changed My Life

    Ep.50 A Fire Walk Changed My Life

    Firewalking is the ultimate challenge. Designed to break through subconscious barriers and harness the power within. Dave takes us on a journey from being an alcoholic to becoming one of the authorities facilitating firewalks. The journey was rough. His life changed when he attended his first Tony Robbins event and participated in a firewalk.



    Shownotes: 

     

    Dave’s journey into the world of fire walking began with his own transformative experience. Inspired by the profound impact it had on his life, he embarked on a mission to share this empowering practice with others.

     

    In this episode, we discussed: 

    1. Dave’s journey of going through the AA process to overcome his alcoholic addiction

    2. Dave’s first time experience with firewalking

    3. How Dave started FireWalk Adventure

     

    Connect with Dave Albin: 

    Dave Albin on Linkedin
    Dave Albin Website



    Connect with Sabine Kvenberg: 

    Sabine Kvenberg on Facebook
    Sabine Kvenberg on Instagram

    Sabine Kvenberg on Linkedin

    Sabine Kvenberg on YouTube

    BECOME Podpage

    Sabine Kvenberg Resources



    [00:00:00] Dave: We're either motivated by inspiration or desperation. And I remember thinking, well, I'm pretty desperate. And, you know, he's right. He said, he said, you know, we'll, we'll do more to avoid pain than we will to gain pleasure. And so a lot of the things he was saying resonated with me. So he was selling a program called Personal Power.

    [00:00:19] And to date this, it came on little white things called cassette tapes. Right. And so it was a 30, it was, it was a, it was a 30 day program, and this is what I, you know, this is why I really love being here with you and your audience is in terms of becoming, because that's where it really started to open my mind up to, you know, I, I remember thinking one time, it looks like, you know, the two most important times of my life we're the moment I was born and the moment I figured out why, and that all started, you know, as far as the becoming for me. Started with Tony Robbins. 

    [00:00:52] Sabine: Hello, my name, Sabine Kvenberg, founder and host of Become. The Content will inspire you to reach your [00:01:00] aspirations and become the best version of yourself. I feature interviews with successful individuals from various industries, delving into their personal and professional journeys and their strategies to achieve their goals.

    [00:01:16] We have to become the person we are meant to be first, so we can live life, we are destined to live. That means we must overcome challenges and work through difficult times to learn, grow, and become the new, more fabulous version of ourselves. I'm so glad that you are here. Let's get on this journey together.

    [00:01:44] Hello and welcome Dave. I'm so excited to have you on the show today. 

    [00:01:50] Dave: I'm great. I'm so excited to be here. Thanks, Sabine, it's really always an honor to have somebody like you to have me on your show. So great to be 

    [00:01:56] Sabine: oh. Oh, fantastic. Thank you. And you know, just [00:02:00] I read your bio and see all the things that you've done.

    [00:02:06] You worked with Tony Robbins, did the fire walk and organized it or helped, organizing it or leading it. I definitely want to talk about that with you later on in the show because I did the firewalk myself. So I wanna get some perspective from you. But before we go there, I just would like for you to, to share with my audience, your upbringing because you were actually adopted.

    [00:02:38] So yes. What happened, with your birth parents or with your birth mother, and what was your past in the upbringing? 

    [00:02:46] Dave: Well, thank you for asking that question because I, I'm always honored to share it because I. You know, my life was really blessed as a result of being adopted in what happened with all that.

    [00:02:55] So my mother, my biological mother, was what you could refer to back in World War II as [00:03:00] Rosie the Riveter. In other words, when the men went off to war, the women stayed home and built tanks and airplanes and guns and, and you know, to defend the nation during World War ii. So she worked for McDonald Douglass and she literally built air airplanes.

    [00:03:12] Well, after the war, she went to work at the Roosevelt Hotel, which is in downtown Hollywood, California. And she met my biological father. And two months before I was born, my biological father was a pilot in Korea. And we don't know exactly what happened, but we know that he had some kind of injury to his head and in an attempt to save his life, they put a plate in his head.

    [00:03:36] Well, it also took his life. He had really intense pain apparently from that plate. So he kept telling my mom that he didn't know how much longer he could take this pain. Well, two months before I was born, he said he was gonna go to the grocery store and we never saw or heard from him again. So my mom was left with the two other boys that she had from a different father and then myself.[00:04:00] 

    [00:04:00] And though she tried really hard to keep me, we were living very close to Hollywood High School, you know, in Hollywood. And when I was five years old, she couldn't make it anymore. She couldn't make ends meet. So she put me up for adoption and her sister. Adopted me, which would've been my aunt and uncle.

    [00:04:17] And so when they adopted me at the age of five, they, both of them, had sworn off drinking Bob and Pat Albin, my adopted parents. And when I was 11, things took a, you know, right turn, made a heck of a change in my life. And they both started drinking. And again, things got pretty, pretty ugly, pretty fast. Well, in my curiosity, one day when they were both gone, you know you could do that back then.

    [00:04:41] Right? You know when we were living in Long Beach, right. You know, an 11 year old kid, if you wanted to leave them, you just told the neighbor across the street, Hey, I'm going to the store. If David needs you, can he come over? And of course the neighbor would say, yeah, of course he can. Right? And so parents did that back in those days, believe it or not.

    [00:04:57] And so they left me one day and I knew where the [00:05:00] booze was and I, and I knew that when they were drinking it, that they changed, there was something about them that was just, you know, things got ugly. And I'm like, what is this stuff? Mm-hmm. And Sabine, I poured it into a glass right? And I, and into a cup actually, and, and about half full.

    [00:05:13] And I drank it. And that was it. I mean, I, I never had a chance. I believe that I was an alcoholic. Right on the spot. Literally. 

    [00:05:21] Sabine: Wow. Wow. And so, so lemme ask you this, when you are 11 years old, you wanted to try out what happened. So, and you pour it in a glass. I can only imagine. It must have tasted terrible because kids really, 

    [00:05:35] Dave: It was horrible.

    [00:05:36] It was disgusting. 

    [00:05:37] Sabine: So what, what made you do it again then? 

    [00:05:40] Dave: It was like it didn't matter because the feeling that I got was brandy, and you're right, it tasted horrible. However, here's the challenge. The challenge was it made me feel invincible. I had, I mean, it was like pouring rocket fuel into my body.

    [00:05:57] And again, I never had a chance. I, I, you know, again, I, I, [00:06:00] I never drank normally. I, you know, the old saying once too many and a thousand's not enough. And that applied to me from the very beginning that I, you know, tasted alcohol for the first time because immediately after drinking it, I wanted more.

    [00:06:13] And I would, you know, steal it. I would hide it, you know? And this is at 11 years old. 11, 12 years old. Wow. I was moving into junior high school and then that just led to hard drugs. And then once I got with hard drugs, then my whole peer group changed. Right? I started hanging around people that I shouldn't.

    [00:06:29] And I mean all of it. Prostitutes, pimps, drug dealers, drug addicts, the streets, gangs, all of that violence, and I turned into a very horrible person. 

    [00:06:41] Sabine: Wow. Let me ask you, did your parents knew that you were drinking secretly? 

    [00:06:49] Dave: Not in the beginning. No. Uhhuh, I was pretty, they were so engulfed in their own alcoholism that they weren't really paying a much attention to what's was going on with me. I was able to hide [00:07:00] it and mask it pretty easily. Now, they found out later, once I was in my teens. Yeah. But they never really put two and two together that, you know, th they've never heard this story cuz my parents have been gone for a long time.

    [00:07:10] Mm-hmm. So what developed there is that, you know, I just got to a point one day I got, you know, when I was in my early thirties and I woke up one morning and said, we're done. I'm not doing this anymore. I was in such physical, emotional, and spiritual pain that all I wanted, all I cared about is that day the pain's gonna stop.

    [00:07:29] We're done here. I'm out. And I literally put a pistol in my mouth. I, I put it in there twice. I was gonna end my life. And I was married to a woman who had three kids. They were my stepkids. And I remember thinking, oh man. When you do that, these kids are gonna see that they're gonna have to live with that.

    [00:07:45] And so from a, a compassion standpoint to me, and I said, you know, I, I can't do that to them. So the alternative was you call this organization called Alcoholics Anonymous. And I did, and I went to my first meeting on [00:08:00] June 8th, 1988. Well, actually with the four meetings that day, they sent a guy to come pick me up and I went to a 12:30, a 4:30, a 6:30 and an 8:30 meeting, and it stuck. It worked. And though the first year of my life, you know, in, in AA was horrible. I had withdrawals like you wouldn't believe the guys were back in those days. They were like, drink orange, juice, fresh, squeezed orange juice, eat a lot of chocolate to try to balance your blood sugar. I probably should have been in rehab.

    [00:08:28] I was probably close to delirium, tremors though I never really got there. Mm-hmm. Cause delirium, tremors will kill you. You know, alcohol, when you come off alcohol, you can actually die from withdrawals. 

    [00:08:38] Sabine: Really? I did not know that. So the aria trimmers, why would they kill you? 

    [00:08:45] Dave: It can send you into cardiac arrest, number one. Number two, sometimes you're shaking so bad if you ever seen an alcoholic who's shaking trying to get alcohol in them. Yes, yes. They'll shake so bad. You, you literally shake your internal organs apart. Wow. It's bad. And that's why they call 'em [00:09:00] tremors because you're sh you know, and I could, I can remember times where, Lots of times where I'd wake up in the morning, well, I'd wake up, let's put it that way.

    [00:09:07] Not necessarily in the morning, but I'd wake up and you have to have a drink to get back to normalcy. Right. You know, and I'd have to, I'd be literally sitting in the, in the bathroom on the toilet, you know, naked with a bucket in one hand and a bottle in the other, trying to drink enough vodka to get it down.

    [00:09:24] And I'd throw it up in the bucket. But eventually you'd take a sip and you'd, you'd drink it and it would stay down. And then you go from shaking like this to shaking like this, and then next thing you know, you drink a little more and next thing you know, the shakes stop. Next thing you know, you drink a little more and now you're, you think you're feeling normal.

    [00:09:45] I remember saying things to myself like, I keep doing that until I would stop shaking and I'd like breathe. And I'm like, okay, you know, it's not so bad. What, what do what? Dave? You're sitting, you're [00:10:00] sitting in the bathroom naked with a bucket, with a bottle of vodka. How can you, you know what I mean? So you lie to yourself at a level that's pretty much unbelievable. Yeah. you know, telling yourself, oh, it's not so bad. Yeah. Right. Well, 

    [00:10:13] Sabine: it's, you know, it's, it's that the two voices that we have in our heads, right. That, that one that always comes up to make excuses, to help you feel better, and for, for one reason, it's also a savings mechanism.

    [00:10:29] hey, absolutely you have to do it, otherwise you may be dead because you're shaking so much. Right. So there's, right. Yeah. It's, it's just so, so challenging, so difficult, and I can only imagine what you went through those times. Now, your wife, how did she and the children for that matter, how did that work out?

    [00:10:52] Dave: it, well, it, it, it didn't, you know, I was at a point in my life where it just wasn't gonna work. She was a [00:11:00] bartender and so when I married her, guess why I married her, right? And when I married her, she had three kids and I thought that would help calm me down. I thought that would, you know, put me on the road to start to living, you know, a decent life.

    [00:11:11] But it didn't, that didn't work. So we ended up in divorce and then later, once I was in AA and living that lifestyle, I met my, the wife of my children who I was married to for 23 years and have two kids with, and again, we met an aa so she was, she was the only wife I had where I was actually sober, and that made a big difference in my life.

    [00:11:34] It was sustainable. 

    [00:11:35] Sabine: Yeah. May is stroke awareness month. Lifeline screening can help detect someone's risk of having a stroke or cardiovascular disease. Each year, more than 700,000 people attend one of those screenings for peace of mind or early detection, and I am one of them. You see, my mother passed away [00:12:00] from cardiovascular disease and I want to do everything I can to feel.

    [00:12:05] Safe. So join me and schedule your screening today to book your appointment. Simply click the link in my show notes.

    [00:12:19] Have you ever tried to build your own website, start a newsletter, or build a course and charge for it? Have you ever wanted to make money online but are totally confused by all the different systems you need to have? That's why I use Kajabi. You can build your webpages, blogs, and membership sites. You can create offers, check out pages, and collect money. You can host your videos. You can start your newsletter list, capture emails, start your marketing funnels all in one place. It makes it fun and easy with awesome tutorials and [00:13:00] support. Since I've joined Kajabi from the beginning, I have a special affiliate link that I would like to share with you.

    [00:13:07] A 30 day free trial. So nothing to lose, but everything to gain. Just go to my link that's in the show notes sabinekvenberg.com/resources and we will redirect you to the free trial page. And if you are just starting out and want to get your offer out for sale in just three days. Let me help you do that.

    [00:13:34] Visit my webpage by the way that I build on Kajabi and apply to making it happen. Now, let's get back to the show. 

    [00:13:46] What happened after you went through that challenging period? What went through your head and how did your life expanded from there? 

    [00:13:57] Dave: Well, what AA opened me up to was [00:14:00] the personal development industry. My sleep patterns were all over the place. You know, I would sleep all different times and I was up late at night all the time. Well, one night I'm up late and there's an infomercial by Tony Robbins, right? He's a, here's a young, vibrant Tony Robbins, and he's all motivated and he's talking about. How we do things in life, right?

    [00:14:20] We're either motivated by inspiration or desperation. And I remember thinking, well, I'm pretty desperate. And, you know, he's right. He said, he said, you know, we'll, we'll do more to avoid pain than we will to gain pleasure. And so a lot of the things he was saying resonated with me. So he was selling a program called Personal Power.

    [00:14:39] And to date this, it came on little white things called cassette tapes. Right? And so it was a 30, it was, it was a, it was a 30 day program, and this is what I, you know, this is why I really love being here with you and your audience is in terms of becoming, because that's where it really started to open my mind up to, you know, I, I remember thinking one time, it looks like, you know, the [00:15:00] two most important times of my life were the moment I was born and the moment I figured out why, and that all started, you know, as far as the becoming for me started with Tony Robbins. Well, after I went through his program for 30 days, I did everything that man taught me to do and it worked well. What happened from there is I loaned, I had a buddy in AA and I, and he's dude, man, you're really changing. I really like your attitude. I like what you're saying in the meetings.

    [00:15:25] You sound very encouraging and. And you know what's going on. I said, well, you know, I'm, I'm listening to this guy by the name of Tony Robbins. I went through his program, I read his book, and he said, wow, that's really cool. I'd love to get into it. And I said, Hey man, I'm here. Let me, you can borrow my tape program.

    [00:15:40] And so he said, really? Sure, absolutely. Here, take it. You go, well, he did. He went through it just like I did. Well, seven years later, he calls me on the phone and says, oh my gosh, Tony Robbins is coming to town. We can go see him in person. Come on man, you got me into this. Let's go. And I said, all right, sure.

    [00:15:58] I'm available that date, those [00:16:00] dates, let's do this. And then, and just as he gets ready to get off the phone, he goes, oh, wait, wait, wait. By the way, I need to tell you something. We're gonna be doing a fire walk. And I remember thinking, oh, no, no, no, no, no. Maybe you are, but I'm not gonna do that. And you know what's so interesting about that?

    [00:16:21] I didn't even know what a fire walk was. I had no reference for that. I didn't know, but it sounded like there was, it was nothing. I was interested because I'm coming from a very fear-based, you know, position in my life at that moment. So, you know, we, we get to the event. We get on our seats. Tony takes the stage at two o'clock in the afternoon, and the next thing I know, it's after midnight.

    [00:16:42] We've been in a room for 10 hours with Tony Robbins. Yep. Dear God, help help us. Right. Well, about that time around midnight, he says, take your shoes off. And I'm like, oh boy, here we go. And now he's been prepping us for this fire walk. Right. [00:17:00] Well, I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna take my shoes off. Why?

    [00:17:04] Because I'm not doing it. And then I thought, well, wait a minute. All these other people are taking their shoes off and if you don't take your shoes off, they're gonna know that you're a coward. And I went, oh my gosh. Well we can't have that can we? So I'll fake it. I'll take my shoes off, which I did well.

    [00:17:23] From there, he takes you out of this giant parking lot. Now I'm with 3,500 people at this event. And when you go outside, he is got everybody chanting. Yes, yes, yes. Clapping their hands and, and when, right. And when you get outside, he's got African drummers to kick up the ambience a little bit. Right? So now it's everybody's clapping and it's dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun dun.

    [00:17:49] And you know, you, you can feel the vibrations. I mean, it is intense. Well over in the corner of this giant parking lot. They had built the fire probably starting around [00:18:00] three o'clock in the afternoon, and they let it burn all night. And so what it does is it renders, right, the coals burn all day, all night, and then you have this giant bed of coals.

    [00:18:09] Well, what they did, because there's so many people at this event, they loaded those coals in a wheelbarrow and then they'd pull a wheelbarrow and they'd lay two lanes of saw of grass, as you know. Mm-hmm. On both sides, right about three feet wide. 15 to 18 feet long and they just took a shovel and they would shovel the coals out on, on that grass.

    [00:18:29] And that's what you walked on? Well, when I got out there, I'm like, well, I'm not doing this. And so I got separated from my buddy and I said, well, I'm just gonna go hide out in the back. Nobody's gonna know except for me. Right? We we're gonna know. Well, hiding out in the back. You think it's a good idea?

    [00:18:48] Think it's a good strategy? Nope. Not. Not a good one at all. Why? Because Tony's people know where all the cowards are. Right? And they're trained to come get you. Oh, is said. So [00:19:00] well, I'm hiding out in the back. All of a sudden, here comes the sky and he makes eye contact with me. And I think Tony trains him.

    [00:19:07] Look, once, don't you make eye contact, don't take your eyes off of him. And so, yeah, he's looking at me, big's eye contact, and he gets like maybe 20 feet from me. And he looks at me and he goes, are you okay? And I, of course I lie. We all lie, right? I go, yeah, no, I'm fine and I'm not fine. And he said, well, are you gonna walk tonight?

    [00:19:27] And I said, absolutely not. And he goes, oh. And I said it to him with a lot of, you know, Get away from me kind of energy. And he said, Hey. And he said, Hey man, that's okay. We don't want you to do anything you don't want to do. And I thought, wow, okay. I like this guy. He's gonna be my ticket out of here.

    [00:19:46] And then this stranger, this guy I've never met, don't know, he asked me a question that changed my life forever. And he said, well, wouldn't you at least like to watch. And I said, well, [00:20:00] actually I'm thinking, yeah, I'd love to watch these people burn their feet off. Let's go do that. And he said, well, you know, I was a hundred yards away from where they were doing it sabine, I couldn't see anything. And he said, well, you're gonna need to just get in line. Right. And, and and his defense, he was telling the truth. He was being congruent cuz I couldn't, I was a hundred yards away. I couldn't see anything. I had 3,500 people in front of me. I couldn't see anything. And, and so I got in line.

    [00:20:26] And after I'm just kind of walking along, walking along, the next thing I know, this guy comes up and he whispers in my ear and he says, he knows when you're ready. When he says, go, you go. And I went, what? And then that guy just disappeared into the night, and I'm kind of walking along and all of a sudden I get to a point I can't see in front of me, but I can see at an angle and I'm looking and I'm going, they're doing this.

    [00:20:47] Look at them. I mean, every race, creed in color is walking on fire and my brain is freaking. I'm like, what in the heck is going on? What are, what are they doing? Why are they doing it? You know, metaphorically, I'm trying to figure all this out, [00:21:00] and as I'm watching and watching and watching and watching, and all of a sudden, boom, guess what?

    [00:21:04] Sabine: You are in the front row. 

    [00:21:05] Dave: I'm in front of the line. That's right. I'm in the front row and now I'm staring down into these and I'm looking at these calls on this lane and there's a wheelbarrow there and you can feel the heat. And my heart's going just, it's just I'm outta my mind with fear. And there's a trainer standing there and all of a sudden he goes, eyes up.

    [00:21:25] And I went, oh. Oh, yeah. Okay. Yeah. Eyes up. Well, when, when, when I was in the, when I was in the room with Tony for 10 hours, guess what? He teaches you? Eyes up. Keep your eyes up. Mm-hmm. Eyes up. Don't stare at what you fear. Look at the celebration end. That's where the reward is. So now my eyes up and he said, squeeze your fist and say, yes.

    [00:21:42] And I went, yes. And he went stronger. And I went, yes. So he could tell I wasn't in a peak state at all. Mm-hmm. Right. I was over here in fear and then he screamed at me. He got like in my face and he said, stronger. And now I'm like ticked off. Right. So now I got adrenaline and I threw my [00:22:00] hands in the air and I went, I screamed at the top of my voice.

    [00:22:02] Yes. And he goes, go, go. Go. I took off. Yeah. Well, wow. As you know, they put two people at the end of the lane, two guys, and they, you know, they lock arms mm-hmm. So that they can stop you. And they're like, stop, wipe your feet and celebrate. Right. And a girl reaches in and pulls me and grabs me and gets me out of the way.

    [00:22:20] Right. Going, you did it. You did it. You did it. Well, they do that because he got somebody coming in behind you. Right. Well, here's the first thing I learned about fire walking. Great lesson, great metaphor for life. When you take that first step onto those coals, oh, you'll take the second, third, fourth, and fifth, I guarantee you.

    [00:22:37] Right? You're not gonna stop in the middle of that fire lane. Well, that was it. 

    [00:22:42] Sabine: So you did the fire walk, and what happened then? What changed? 

    [00:22:48] Dave: Well, what changed was, you know, again, that night it was spectacular. It was one of the most unbelievable experiences of my entire life. And the next day, this is where it really [00:23:00] got interesting for me.

    [00:23:01] I'm in a foyer with 3,500 people getting ready to go into the venue, and I'm looking around Sabine and I'm watching all these people, and they were communicating unlike anything I'd ever been, been around. I've never seen or experienced anything like this. They were laughing, they were crying, they were hugging, they were engaging, they were telling their story.

    [00:23:22] It was just like, it was like story time everywhere. 3,500 people just were completely transformed the night before and now here's how they show up the next morning. And so it was, what was happening is this, what's your podcast is about? They were becoming, And so I'm watching all this and looking at all this, and I'm thinking to myself, really is this, did this happen?

    [00:23:42] Did we drink a Kool-Aid? I mean, did this happen because of the fire walk? And the answer is yes. Now, I've, I've since studied fire walking pretty intensely, and it's been around for a thousand years. It's been used by cultures everywhere. The Phehisians the people of India use it, the Polynesians, the [00:24:00] Hawaiians, the India Europeans, the Native American Indians, and they use it as a very spiritual growth.

    [00:24:06] They use it for graduation. They use it for rite of passage. Tony was using it to get leverage on people, right? So that if you could walk on fire, What else can you do? So I, I got involved with the, as a volunteer, and then from there I got asked to be a subcontractor. I had a security background and in the military, so I got recruited to help with some of Tony's celebrities.

    [00:24:27] And then I got put on the fire team and I got offered a, a subcontracting position. And I started working for Tony in 1990. It was 1995 E, either late 95, 96, and then 2003, my life forever changed. Tony offered me the fire captain's position, which meant that I would take over all of his fire walks globally, which I did.

    [00:24:50] 2014 is when things took another turn. Yeah, so 2014, I'm driving down the road, my phone rings, and guess who it is? A little company [00:25:00] called Google. Google's calling me and they're like, you know, I'm like, hello? And they're like, hi, this, my name is so and so. My name is Anne. I'm with Google. And are you the Dave Alba that does the fire walks for Tony Robbins?

    [00:25:11] Yes. Why? What? How can I help you? And they said, well, we'd like to talk to you about you coming to, mountain View, and we have 148 executives are gonna graduate and we want to create an incredible experience. We understand you're the, you're the guy to talk to about that. And so they ended up hiring me.

    [00:25:29] And, you know, they were like, you know, if you're not under any non-compete or contractual obligation, yeah. You know, we, we'd like to have you on such and such a date. And I looked at my calendar, yeah, I'm available. And then I said, so what's your budget for this? Right. And they, they wrote it down and they said this.

    [00:25:46] And I looked at it and went, okay, I can work with you guys. No problem. Let's do this. So once I got to Google, I knew, well, actually two of the executives pulled me aside at lunch after the event [00:26:00] and they were like, Hey, you know, you know, we wanna share something with you. You might want to consider doing this, you know, on your own as well.

    [00:26:08] Cuz there's a heck of a marketplace in corporate America for this because CEOs and business owners need some kind of experience to create a huge shift in their people. And we don't know that there's anything out there. Anything like fire walking? We don't think there is. I mean, we're Google, you know, we, we, we have the information available to us, right?

    [00:26:30] And I'm like, okay, well Google's telling you there's a marketplace, there probably is. And they were right, of course, obviously. Because I went from Google to NASA. I went from NASA to Notre Dame, to Virginia Tech, to Microsoft, to Heineken, to Remax, to Chick-fil-A, to the entrepreneur organization. I mean, I just, it just kept growing organically.

    [00:26:51] And so here we are, you know, and I'm still, I'm still doing it today. The cool thing today is what I, what's happened for me now is I'm running the Dave Alban Fire Walk [00:27:00] Academy. And what we do there is we bring in people who wanna either come as a life coach and they want to enhance, you know, what you know their, what they offer to their clients.

    [00:27:11] And or a company will send somebody from the HR department, we'll teach them how to do fire walking, glass walking, board breaks, arrow brakes, rebar, bending, a whole bunch of different things. And then they take those experiences back to their company and can facilitate, you know, for their own company. 

    [00:27:29] Sabine: If you could give one piece of advice to my audience, what would that be?

    [00:27:36] Dave: Stop looking for heroes and be one. 

    [00:27:39] Sabine: Oh, I love it. I love it all. Thank you so much. If somebody wants to get in touch with you to become a firework facilitator to go through your academy, how can they do that? 

    [00:27:52] Dave: They can go to www.firewalkadventures.com. Perfect and schedule a, [00:28:00] schedule a discovery call. They will personally talk to me and I'll take them through the interview process.

    [00:28:06] And if we think it's a match and you've got good intentions and you're there to serve and you're there for love and connection and to really, really, Help change people's lives on a grand scale. You might find yourself at our academy next October. 

    [00:28:21] Sabine: This was such an eye-opening, delightful, inspiring conversation. Dave, thank you for being on this show today. 

    [00:28:31] Dave: It was my pleasure. Thanks, Sabine 

    [00:28:33] Sabine: That was my interview, and if you enjoyed it, give us a five star review, leave a comment and share it with your friends. Thanks for listening until I see you again. Always remember, serve from the heart, follow your passion, and live the life you imagine.

    Ep.49 The Lifestyle Engineering Blueprint

    Ep.49 The Lifestyle Engineering Blueprint

    Description: 

    The world’s best Lifestyle Engineer, Zach White is sharing how losing his focus and balance ended in burnout and divorce. In his words: Nothing prepared me for the darkest days of my life. While he would never wish a tragedy on anyone, he was thankful for this experience. It forced him to ask bigger and better questions, and he was able to completely transform the way he works and how he lives, and he is going to share his wisdom with us today.



    Shownotes: 

    Zach shares his personal story of how losing his focus and balance led to burnout and ultimately, divorce. He reflects on the darkest days of his life and how this experience forced him to ask bigger and better questions, which led to a complete transformation in the way he works and lives.

    Zach's journey is an inspiring one, and he generously shares his wisdom with us, providing insights into how to achieve balance, focus, and success in both our personal and professional lives. From his personal experiences, Zach has developed a unique approach to coaching, one that is holistic and takes into account all aspects of an individual's life.

     

    In this episode, we discussed: 

    1. Losing focus and balance can have serious consequences, including burnout and personal upheaval.

    2. Difficult experiences can lead to personal growth and transformation as long as we're willing to ask bigger and better questions.

    3. Zach's holistic approach to coaching takes into account all aspects of an individual's life and can help us achieve balance, focus, and success in both our personal and professional lives.

     

    Connect with Zach White: 

     

    Zach White on Linkedin

     

    Connect with Sabine Kvenberg: 

    Sabine Kvenberg on Facebook

    Sabine Kvenberg on Instagram

    Sabine Kvenberg on Linkedin

    Sabine Kvenberg on YouTube

    BECOME Podpage

    Sabine Kvenberg Resources

     

    Transcript

    00:00:00 Zach: The thing that will stand between you and your dreams is fear. And so we need to step out of our comfort zone, have the courage to face those fears, and take action in our life. So if there's one thing I could tell you, it's to crush comfort and create courage because the life of your dreams will not be found in your comfort zone. And the sooner you embrace that and start living out at the edges of what's possible for you, the faster you're gonna see your life increase in ways you could not even imagine.




    00:00:34 Sabine: Hello, my name is Sabine Kvenberg, founder and host of BECOME. The  content will inspire you to reach your aspirations and become the best version of yourself. I feature interviews with successful individuals from various industries, delving into their personal and professional journeys and their strategies to achieve their goals. We have to become the person we are meant to be first. So we can live life, we are destined to live. That means we must overcome challenges and work through difficult times to learn, grow, and become the new more fabulous version of ourselves. I'm so glad that you are here. Let's get on this journey together.




    00:01:25 Sabine: I had the pleasure of sitting down with the world's best lifestyle engineer, Zach White. If you want to see results in your life, you have to have the courage to step out of your comfort zone and pair that courage with a proven system of success, what he calls 

    Lifestyle Engineering. And you can accelerate more than just your career. And this is what I talked with Zach about in our interview. Not only is he sharing his story, but you will learn what it takes to have more balance. Welcome, Zach. I'm so happy to have you as my guest today.




    00:02:04 Zach: Oh, Sabine, it's a pleasure to be here. Thank you so much for inviting me. 




    00:02:09 Sabine: Oh, let's get started by, just, tell us where you are right now. I think you are somewhere in Michigan, is that right?




    00:02:19 Zach: Yeah, yeah. You found me sitting in my office, which is in a coworking space here in southwest Michigan. A small lake town. If you're not from the area, you wouldn't know it, but it's called Benton Harbor and just a mile from beautiful Lake Michigan. And I was mentioning  to you before the recording, so we were finally feeling some springtime weather, which for Michiganders, is a big deal, like putting that cloud cover and cold weather behind us, ready for some sunshine and some lake life. So bring it on.




    00:02:53 Sabine: Oh, right. All right. And yeah, here, the sun is out, but here in Florida, it is seasonably cold. We are in the 60s, and for, end of March, it's pretty cold. So. But I guess, it all depends on.




    00:03:11 Zach: That's right. It's all relative. Uh, 67. I can't wait for 67. That's, we're still a month or two away from 67, Sabine. 




    00:03:20 Sabine: So Zach, you are a lifestyle engineering coach now, but you started out as an engineer. So how did you go from engineer solving problems to totally shift lifestyle? So how did that happen?




    00:03:45 Zach: Yeah, well, I joke, Sabine, that I'm a mechanical engineer by my degrees, but I'm a lifestyle engineer through the school of hard knocks and life lessons. So my actual background is in mechanical engineering. To your comment, I have my bachelor's from Purdue and my masters from U of M, both in mechanical engineering. And I went into Whirlpool Corporation to build my engineering career with big aspirations and big goals. Just like most engineers who come outta college, do wanna make a name for yourself, make an impact, go get those promotions, and build a successful career. And in the journey towards that success, I made some big mistakes and I ended up burning out, finding myself divorced and depressed and disappointed with how my career had gone, but more importantly, how my life fell apart in the process. And it was the recovery from that rock bottom experience where lifestyle engineering was born, asking new questions, finding new ways to succeed, that considered my whole life's success, not just my career. And very happy to say it worked. I had incredible success after, and that's what then led to me doing this full-time as a coach and as a CEO of Oasis of Courage.




    00:05:08 Sabine: Oh, fantastic. But one thing that you said, I think is so oftentimes overlooked, and that is the fact that sometimes we have to hit rock bottom to realize what we really ought to do in this world and what gives us the joy and the freedom to live a happy and fulfilled life. So when you started working and you had all the successes and your career took off, what was it that really made you realize the career is not everything? So what was that darkest time in your life that really made you, shall I say, wake up? 




    00:06:03 Zach: The wake up call moment in anyone's journey is always, you know, very, you know, poignant, easy to remember exactly where I was. And Sabine, I'll tell you the story in my world, at the time, everything was fine. You know, I thought I had it all under control. And I was on a work trip out in Tennessee working at one of the factories where Whirlpool has a manufacturing facility. And Sabine, I came home from the trip and I was tired. It'd been a long trip, working long hours. And I really hadn't talked to my spouse very much while I was gone. And I was expecting to come home, to her being there. And the house was empty. And I walked in and I was confused, thought maybe she went out, you know, I called, she didn't answer. And then I'm walking around the house and I found a note on the table that essentially said, I don't think this is working. I'm ready to get divorced. 




    00:07:05 Zach: And that moment for me was the wake up call. That's when my entire world came crashing down around me. And the truth is, looking back, Sabine, that I was lying to myself about everything being okay. The signs were there long before that moment, that things were not going well at home. But I had chosen to ignore it. I had chosen to pretend outwardly that everything was okay, and I just put my focus on the things that were working, and I ignored the things that were not working. And as you can imagine, the tension between that just grows and grows. And, you know, eventually to your point, if you don't do something, you hit rock  bottom. And I'll be honest, that was a very, very painful night. I mean, a lot of tears, a lot of heartache, but some powerful things shifted that night in my life. And it began with being honest with myself and being honest with the people who loved me. You know, calling my sister, calling my mom, telling them the truth for the first time that my life was not what I was pretending it was, and I needed help.




    00:08:13 Sabine: Wow, what you said was so impactful that number one, we oftentimes, choose not to see the signs. We try to avoid and ignore them because it's uncomfortable. 




    00:08:32 Zach: Yeah. 




    00:08:32 Sabine: But if we do more of those, it becomes even more uncomfortable or even worse, like in your case, you found your house empty. What I liked, what you just shared, that for the first time, you were honest, you called your parents and your mom, your sister, and really told them as it was. Isn't it so true sometimes, in family we hide what's going on and because we don't wanna show our weaknesses perhaps? So what was the process once you get really raw and honest? What was the process for you as far as getting through it?




    00:09:24 Zach: Grief comes first. You know, I'll be honest, the first few days or weeks, Sabine, were just kind of messy. Very messy. A lot of tears, a lot of confusion. But the relief of telling the truth the way I did, gave me enough weight off of my shoulders to take a next step. And for me, beyond just talking to the people I love, that was going to see a counselor, getting on the calendar, going and working with a professional therapist, that's saying, hey, this is happening. I need help. I'm in a lot of pain. And the grief is real. And you go through these stages of suffering and grief. And that was very real to me. It was very, I mean, physically painful, emotionally painful, spiritually painful to go through. But I think the most important thing was the willingness to sit in that place, to just allow the pain to be present.




    00:10:22 Zach: And that's something that I was dodging to your point earlier, Sabine, like pretending that it wasn't there for so long. There was a lot of built up negative energy in my life that needed to be let go. And so that was the first stage, was just a willingness to let my life be a mess for a while, and acknowledge that I wasn't as, you know, well put together as everybody thought I was. But from there, after, you know, you're in that kind of trough place. Your face is grinding against the floor of rock bottom as it were, right? You know, then you stand up and you start to just put one foot in front of the other. And what I tell everybody, who I've coached, who's gone through any form of burnout or suffering or a rock bottom experience like this, or if you're going through it right now, you have to bring the time horizon in a little bit.




    00:11:12 Zach: We're not gonna solve the whole thing in one move. We're not gonna go, create the perfect life in one day. Let's zoom, way in. I like to call it drawing smaller circles. Rather than solving for the big equation, let's just solve, for this afternoon, what are we gonna do this afternoon to make sure it's a little bit better than yesterday, to make sure we're not going back to those same patterns or habits that got us stuck in the first place and put one foot in front of the other. And as we build momentum, we can begin to extend that time horizon again and think about bigger goals and longer term dreams again, you know, entering into a new relationship. Again, in my case, all of those things. But at the start, let's just focus on the moment in front of us, right? What's the next thing we need to do in drawing those smaller circles and prioritizing a shorter time horizon because it's so overwhelming. We don't have the cognitive ability to go think about these longer term things. So that's my most important lesson from that time, was look, when you're really under pressure, when you're really overwhelmed, or if your life is completely confusing and falling apart, let's just zoom, way in. You don't need to solve everything. Let's just get today buttoned up the best we can, make the best next decision, and then we can come back to tomorrow.




    00:12:33 Sabine: It's so true. Couple things that I got out of what you just shared. Number one, the willingness to sit and let it pass. And also recognize our grieve, our suffering, and not just chopping it away, because if we don't let it out, it just fester and make us perhaps bitter or whatnot, right? So.




    00:12:59 Zach: Yeah.




    00:12:59 Sabine: Just going through that process is a resolving process and resolving journey. And then you were able to move forward again. And what you did, you got help. And we all need help at one point or another in certain situations. 




    00:13:21 Sabine: May is stroke awareness month. Life Line Screening can help detect someone's risk of having a stroke or cardiovascular disease. Each year, more than 700,000 people attend one of those screenings for peace of mind or early detection. And I am one of them. You see, my mother passed away from cardiovascular disease and I want to do everything I can to feel safe. So join me and schedule your screening today. To book your appointment, simply click the link in my show notes.




    00:14:02 Sabine: Have you ever tried to build your own website, start a newsletter, or build a course and charge for it? Have you ever wanted to make money online but are totally confused by all the different systems you need to have? That's why I use Kajabi. You can build your webpages, blogs, and membership sites. You can create offers, check out pages, and collect money. You can host your videos, you can start your newsletter list, capture emails, start your marketing funnels all in one place. It makes it fun and easy with awesome tutorials and support. Since I've joined Kajabi from the beginning, I have a special affiliate link that I would like to share with you. A 30 day free trial. So nothing to lose, but everything to gain. Just go to my link that's in the show notes, sabinekvenberg.com/resources and we will redirect you to the free trial page. And if you are just starting out and want to get your offer out for sale in just three days, let me help you do that. Visit my webpage, by the way, that I build on Kajabi and apply to making it happen. Now, let's get back to the show.




    00:15:33 Sabine: So after you went through that grieving process, and another thing that I liked what you're saying, taking one step at a time, cuz that's another thing I believe a lot of people think, oh, they have to resolve everything either in their personal life or even in business venture. If you have to go through a very challenging situation sometimes, no, you cannot go from A to Z in one step. You have to take steps in between. And those little steps, when was your decision to actually make changes in your life after you got through that grieving process that really led you to become the lifestyle engineer that you are today?




    00:16:25 Zach: Yeah, Sabine, there was a point, and I wish I could pinpoint exactly when, but I really can't. It's something that came gradually through the healing journey where I realized that the passion and the ambition inside of me to be successful in my career, to make an impact with my life and in the world through engineering and through, you know, the great mind that God had given me and the the skills that I had and that was still inside me, right? Going through burnout and divorce and depression did not eliminate something that was born inside me and my purpose for life. And I still had that fire there to do something. But right next to the fire for achievement was this fear of going through something like I had gone through already. It's like, there must be a different way to go, achieve something meaningful with my life but not suffer like this.




    00:17:26 Zach: And it was that moment where I said, okay, I don't know the answer to that, but I'm unwilling to do nothing. I would rather keep going and try again and fail again than do nothing. I'm more afraid of, you know, getting to the end of my life with regrets than I am afraid of failing again. And so that's when I hired my first coach. I had worked with a therapist on the grief and this idea of recovery and healing, but I knew from other people who I had as mentors and people I respected, that coaching was a powerful catalyst to forward progress and change and making results happen in your life. So I hired a coach and I presented them with this challenge and said, hey, I want success, but I don't want to go through this again. There must be another way. I need help.




    00:18:16 Zach: And I began working with a coach and, you know, the rest is history in a way. I went on to five promotions in five years. I doubled my income, I had an incredibly fun time working less hours than I ever had before. And along the way, I captured all these lessons and really distilled it down for the engineering mind because, you know, as an engineer, we think a  bit differently. We approach the world a bit differently. And that became the lifestyle engineering blueprint that we now coach our clients in. But it was honestly just learning as I went, how to do this in a different way.




    00:18:50 Sabine:Yeah. And as you said, as we experience, as we learn, we can implement and teach it to others. So how do engineers learn differently and what's the difference between an engineering mind and everybody else's mind?




    00:19:08 Zach: Oh, we don't have enough time on this podcast to talk about all of the differences. You know, if you are an engineer, you already understand and appreciate some of this and most people know at least one engineer. And you can point to some of the stereotypes that are common. So let's just, you know, be honest about what these things are. For one, generally speaking, we'll paint with broad brushes here, more introverted, more shy, generally speaking, they see the world in a black and white way. And I'll include myself in this. I used to be this way because we're trained to go find the right answer. And mathematics and science and most of the schooling that we go through is all rooted in learning the principles and applying them to problems in a way that finds the solution. And we end up in this very narrow approach to living where everything has a solution and often it's one right answer.




    00:20:03 Zach: Then we come outta college and go into our careers. And it's hard enough to face the reality that there's more than one way to design something or to solve the problem. Then you add on the complexity of all the emotional and social intelligence required to work on these complex cross-disciplinary teams. And it really can be overwhelming for a lot of engineers to adapt to that. On top of that, let's put even one more layer. The engineering mind is trained to go find everything that can break, everything that can go wrong, all the points of failure in every system. That's what we get paid to do. And we wanna take everything to a point of failure in life. It's like, this is the way we think in terms of design. Well, anybody who's in psychology or cognitive behavioral therapy or coaching will tell you, if the thing that you focus on constantly is the negative side, if all you're looking for are points of failure and what can go wrong, that's what you're going to continue to get more of and create, especially in your relationships. And people get frustrated at engineers for always, you know, shutting down their ideas or telling them how things can go wrong or not. Well, let's forgive them in a way cuz it's the only thing we're taught. 




    00:21:22 Zach: And that creates a lot of problems in our relationships and in our lives as well as in your career development. So that's just naming a couple of obvious ones, Sabine. There's more, but we need to adapt the way we think about career growth and then lifestyle design. This idea of balancing the rest of our lives in the context of those challenges. You know, how do we overcome that in a way that engineers can wrap their heads around, which means systematically in a logical way, in a way that's gonna align with their strengths. Not just go tell an engineer, hey, stop being like an engineer. Like, that doesn't work. You can't just tell somebody to stop being themselves.




    00:22:03 Sabine: No, that's so true and I really admire that you tackle that from that perspective, being an engineer. I mean, our two worlds can't be any more far apart because I'm on the total of the spectrum. I'm a creator. You know, I'm a performer. I'm just like.




    00:22:26 Zach: Yes.




    00:22:27 Sabine: Hey, show me the world, right? And math was never my strong point. I am not getting satisfaction with solving problems. I mean, I do, right? But you know what I'm saying? 




    00:22:41 Zach: It's  different. It's different. 




    00:22:42 Sabine: It's just different, right? But as you said, the engineers in this world and even if you are not an engineer, you might be an introvert, you might be a problem solver. That's your mentality, that's your personality. And those people are probably looking for a coach like you who can approach it from that angle. So I like that.




    00:23:10 Zach: Yeah, you're right. It's not unique to engineers, that's just a group that I really resonate with. But for example, we have a client in our program right now who works in sales, but her mindset is an analytical one, and she has some of these same qualities in her approach and her background. And you would think, sales, how is it possible to be an introvert and succeed in sales? Well, you'd be amazed, you know, it's not uncommon for someone to end up in a place where they are constantly having to face some limitations, where their personality doesn't serve them in their role. And this is an example where someone says, okay, I really need to overcome these things in order to be successful, even more so than an engineer might. And so, yeah, there's a lot of people who connect with this approach, who may not be in STEM professions.




    00:24:01 Sabine: And you also have a podcast called the Happy Engineer Podcast. So tell us about that podcast. Who are your guests and what you're trying to achieve with it?




    00:24:15 Zach: Well, the Happy Engineer was named that because at the end of the day, if you get big success in your titles and promotions at paychecks, but you hate your life, then we have not succeeded yet. So I really believe, Sabine, what we're all looking for here is to love the journey towards our dream and our vision. So the Happy Engineer is an entire series of conversations around that idea. How do I build my career to the level that I want, whether that's CTO or just senior engineer, it doesn't matter. But also balance what I love in the rest of my life, to honor the time I want with my family, to take care of my health, to really look at myself as a whole person and not become a victim to some of the cultural challenges of, especially big organizations where the pressure to deliver can be so high and engineers are stressed out. 




    00:25:09 Zach: Engineers are struggling with dealing with all these demands, especially when you add a spouse and some kids and a mortgage and all these other challenges of living life. So the Happy Engineer Podcast brings guests from engineering, you know, folks who've succeeded at this and are living on the other side of the lessons learned, as well as people from these other disciplines who can help us to address areas where we're not strong. You know, health coaches or mindset coaches, people who can really dig into the areas that an engineer may not explore very often on their own. Because we tend to be drawn to the sciences and we love to listen to tech speak and that kind of thing. So it's a very well-rounded set of conversations because I really do believe we wanna be well-rounded in our success.




    00:25:54 Sabine: Absolutely. Absolutely. And I go onto podcasts with the wisdom that I can contribute to the audiences and, you know, it's all about that balance, right? And when we are open to listen to the other person or to the other “side,” just in general, it is very important to be open. Otherwise, we are getting so narrow minded, so almost, like the horses with those, what you call it, the sight.




    00:26:33 Zach: The blinders. Yeah.




    00:26:34 Sabine: The blinders, exactly. And you see it in all areas, you know, of personal and work related politics. Oh, my goodness. If we are not open to listen to others, then we can get really, really stuck. 




    00:26:49 Zach: No doubt. 




    00:26:50 Sabine: So, yeah.




    00:26:51 Zach: Well, and you are a great role model of this, Sabine. I mean, I love your content. I actually just listened to episode 41 of Become with [Brandon Kumar Sammi]. He was on my podcast as well. And just the power of those conversations and the idea of becoming what this whole show is about, it begins with that openness. If you don't lean into a growth mindset and  an open coachable spirit, then you're gonna miss that opportunity to become the best version of yourself. So I think there's no one better to talk about this than you.




    00:27:23 Sabine: Oh, good. Good. So, well maybe I'll… can tell something to your listeners as  well and contribute to your listeners. I would love to, but well, we are out of time. Oh, my goodness. You know, I always like having wonderful conversations. I could go on.




    00:27:42 Zach: I know. I know.




    00:27:43 Sabine: Forever and ever. So if people want to get in touch with you, what would be the best way?




    00:27:51 Zach: Thank you, Sabine. And for what it's worth, I agree, we could go all day. I understand why Joe Rogan and some of these other podcasters have three and four hour long episodes because it's so fun to have these chats. You know, you mentioned the Happy Engineer Podcast already, and if someone out there is listening who wants to hear more from me or get deeper into lifestyle engineering, just wherever you're listening to become, jump over and give a  follow to the Happy Engineer. You'll find us on all the platforms. But if this really resonates for you, maybe you are an engineer or you know one who really needs help with this and is looking for support to build their career and get to the next level, it would be an absolute honor to give you a free coaching session and share with you what we do and how we support people and see if it's a fit to work together. So if that's you, then grab your phone and send a text message right now. The word, Lifestyle. The word Lifestyle, send that to 5-5-4-4-4. It's one of those short codes, really simple, Lifestyle to 5-5-4-4-4. We'll send you the information to get on our calendar. And if it's a fit, we'll get you a free session with me and provide as much value as we can. So it'd be an honor to do that for your listeners, Sabine.




    00:29:02 Sabine: Oh, fantastic. And I'll make sure to have that information in our show notes as well. So if there would be one piece of advice that you would give, not only engineers, but just in general, maybe a quote or something like that, what would that be?




    00:29:20 Zach: The thing that will stand between you and your dreams is fear. And so we need to step out of our comfort zone, have the courage to face those fears, and take action in your life. So if there's one thing I could tell you, it's crush comfort and create courage because the life of your dreams will not be found in your comfort zone. And the sooner you embrace that and start living out at the edges of what's possible for you, the faster you're gonna see your life increase in ways you could not even imagine. So crush comfort and create courage, that's a decision you'll never regret.




    00:30:00 Sabine: Thank you so much. That was just a perfect ending for this podcast, and I wish you all the best and I look forward, having another conversation.




    00:30:11 Zach: Thank you so much, Sabine. You're amazing. I appreciate the invitation and blessings to you and your amazing audience. It's been a pleasure.




    00:30:18 Sabine: That was my interview. And if you enjoyed it, give us a five star review, leave a comment, and share it with your friends. Thanks for listening. Until I see you again. Always remember, serve from the heart, follow your passion, and live the life you imagine.

    Ep.42 Unstoppable - We Can Have It All

    Ep.42 Unstoppable - We Can Have It All

    After being abused by her drug-addicted mother, she was adopted at the age of 4. Victoria has been driven to show the world that no matter your circumstances, you can create a successful and happy life. Today she is a wife, mom, and Corporate Executive who received many awards. Victoria’s message is that we CAN have it all as long as we live a life of NoExcuses.

     

    Shownotes: 

    Victoria Pelletier was a determined 11-year-old who wanted to be better than what she had. Even though she had to deal with a lot of trouble and trauma as a child, she was determined to do well and worked her way to the top, becoming COO at 24, President at 35, and CEO at 41. She learned to pick herself up and keep going, and her drive helped her achieve many things. Victoria now serves on many boards, coaches and mentors female entrepreneurs, and speaks on leadership, culture, diversity, and inclusion, all to make the world a safer, more welcoming place. In her book, "Unstoppable," she talks about her motto and life philosophy, which she hopes will inspire other people to be brave and take charge of their lives.

     

    In this episode, you will learn the following:

    1. How Victoria Pelletier achieved success in business despite extreme adversity and trauma in her childhood.

    2. How she developed resilience and overcame challenges to become an unstoppable force.

    3. How she encourages others to take control of their career and build a strong personal brand.

     

    Connect with Victoria Pelletier: 

    Victoria Pelletier Website

    Victoria Pelletier on Linkedin

    Victoria Pelletier on Instagram

    Want to hear more of Victoria Pelletier’s story? Grab your copy of the Unstoppable book here.

     

     

    Connect with Sabine Kvenberg: 

    Free Resources: https://www.sabinekvenberg.com/resources 

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    TRANSCRIPT

     

    00:00:00 Sabine: Hello, my name is Sabine Kvenberg, founder and host of BECOME. The content will inspire you to reach your aspirations and become the best version of yourself. I feature interviews with successful individuals from various industries, delving into their personal and professional journeys and their strategies to achieve their goals. We have to become the person we are meant to be first, so we can live the life we are destined to live. That means we must overcome challenges and to work through difficult times to learn, grow, and become the new, more fabulous version of ourselves. I'm so glad that you're here. Let's get on this journey together. 

     

    00:00:54 Sabine: My guest today, Victoria Pelletier, has an unstoppable spirit. She is a prolific speaker, whose personal story carries so much strength. After being abused by her drug addicted mother, she was adopted at the age of four. Victoria has been driven to show the world that no matter your circumstances, you can create a successful and happy life. Today, she is a wife, mom, and corporate executive who received many awards. Victoria's message is that “We CAN have it all, as long as we live a life of NoExcuses.” Welcome, Victoria, I'm so happy to have you as my guest today.

     

    00:01:42 Victoria: Thanks, Sabine. I'm happy to be here. 

     

    00:01:44 Sabine: And I must say, reading your bio, it seems like you must be already ready for retirement. But I see you're here in front of me and you're this beautiful young woman, have accomplished so many things. But I'm sure that you also had to go through some of challenging situations. But before we go into your unstoppable mentality and vigorous character, why don't you give us just a quick background of who you are? What you have done? 

     

    00:02:25 Victoria: Sure, happy to. So I am, as you said, a long time in business, which is why you expected to see more gray hair here. I do cover them, mind you. I had been working since I was 11. And by 14, I was already in my first leadership role and promoted up through the ranks. What's really interesting is I expected to be a lawyer. That's what I was studying and was about to transfer to law school when I had the opportunity to take a promotion from the bank that I was working at, at the time. And when I decided I was never after that work for a number of years, I was like, “I guess I'm not going back to law school or going to law school, nor moving back to my hometown.” And continue the progression from there and became a COO at just age 24, president by 35, CEO at 41. 

     

    00:03:16 Victoria: And where it comes from quite honestly, use the phrase and title of my book, Unstoppable. It is my mantra and my life's philosophy. And I often talk about diversity, equity, inclusion, and understanding people's why. And that's their lived experience, what gets them to where they are today. And your listeners are probably wondering, and as do many of the people that I speak to, where did the drive? Where did this all come from? How did it come into being? And it's because I overcame extreme adversity in my youth, abused by the teenage drug addicted mother, who gave birth to me, for a number of years. I was fortunate to be adopted. And a series of other unfortunate events that occurred from there through my childhood. And I believe that you have a choice in terms of how you react and respond to things and pick up and how do you move forward. So it is those early years that really pushed me to be better than either the biology that I was born into or the circumstances, which I had otherwise experienced too, to get to where I am today. 

     

    00:04:17 Sabine: So at what age were you adopted? 

     

    00:04:21 Victoria: At four.

     

    00:04:22 Sabine: Okay, okay. So, obviously, the first few years are very, very pregnant for us as human beings, but we get there and a lot of the stuff lives in our unconscious mind even up into adulthood. So when you said you had some of abuse and challenges in your childhood, can you remember what that was? 

     

    00:04:49 Victoria: I can and it's unusual because a lot of children don't remember things before the age of six or seven perhaps. And for me, I can very much remember being two and three years old, and abused by my biological mother, whether that was pushed up and down stairs. I had teeth that had been impacted as a result of that, even my baby teeth. Even to this day, one of my eye droops a little bit lower than the other because I had a cigarette in my eye and I wore a patch for months. 

     

    00:05:20 Sabine: Oh, my goodness. 

     

    00:05:21 Victoria: So I remembered a lot of it. Those were, ended up being quite formative, even though we would say it's a little bit later in children's lives just because of the trauma that I dealt with.

     

    00:05:31 Sabine: Wow, wow. That is something. I've never heard of this, that you remember. But obviously, it was very traumatic. During your years of being adopted, how was that for you as a child? Did you really see them as your parents? Or were they just basically taking care of you? What was that bond that you had with your adopted parents?

     

    00:06:03 Victoria: I very much saw them as my parents. And that's grown into how I view it today. You parents are those that raise you, quite frankly. And so they are my parents. And so I viewed them that way. But what I will say is the trauma and feeling, like I internalized a lot of the abuse I received at the hands of my biological mother as something I did wrong, and then ultimately to be removed. And/or she agreed to give me to my adoptive parents so that they knew one another. But still, I felt a sense of rejection and insecurity always. So even though I believed my parents were my parents, and my mum, especially I had a much closer bond to her than I did to my dad. I was still pushing away. I remember my mom saying to me many times, like “Tori, you need to stop. We are not giving you away.” Because I would push and I would challenge out of fear, quite honestly. Like if I can push you away before you do me, maybe it's a less hurt, is what I viewed it. So it took a lot of years to get comfortable in that setting.

     

    00:07:09 Sabine: Yeah, I mean, this is one of those coping mechanism that we have as human beings. And I know what you're talking about. And fortunately, I was not abused, but I lost my birth father when I was just three years old. And I didn't remember much. But in my adulthood, way later in my adulthood, I had really fear of rejections, fear of being left alone, and I didn't know where this come from. I had separation anxieties, when I was in my adulthood, until I really worked through it. And it came about, that it was from those childhood experiences. And I totally get it, we have to work through it. Now, obviously, what was it in your upbringing? Was your foster parents or was your adopted parents that led you to who you are today, that unstoppable personality that you have, really wanting to succeed? Where are they going? Were they acting as role models for you? Did they give you some push? Was this something evolved other than yourself?

     

    00:08:31 Victoria: I think, I wouldn't say it was, role models for my parents. My mum, at one point said, “You have to do better than us.” She actually meant socioeconomically and vocationally because my dad was a school janitor. And my mom was a secretary. She had wishes of being an artist or whatnot. And her own father pushed her down a very different path. And so they encouraged me to do more and better in their eyes. Sabine, I think hearing that from my parents, it was nice and helpful. But the reality is, I became so driven. The early years for me were outside of my control. And so for me, my schoolwork and then my paid work were all things that I could control, my work ethic, how hard I worked, how much learnings and credentials I received to be better and better from a work perspective. And so it was that drive that I think really propelled me, not because I had role models. I just was determined I was going to be better than biology or circumstance. 

     

    00:09:34 Victoria: And then the other thing is, I had a number of things happen to me throughout childhood. So the height I am now, we can't tell through this, for the subtle screen. I mean, I was five foot eight by the time I was 11. Maybe I remember being taller than my teachers. I was gifted academically in a time where the kids made fun of it whereas I feel like in today's society, in generation, they admire that. So there were just lots of challenges to a teenage rape for me as well. So it was all of these things that just came in to me. And I think at some point, you have a choice to pick up and move on or wallow in that. And I worry about what that would look like. So long way of saying, I think my mum helped and pushed me, but I was running towards something, always. 

     

    00:10:25 Sabine: It is definitely something that, if you get this recognition, if you are the best that you can be, then you feel good about yourself and knowing that you're worth something versus how you grew up and how you were treated like you were worth nothing. I think that  could have been a coping mechanism. So you mentioned you had to go through a teenage rape.

     

    00:10:57 Victoria: Yeah, it was hard, me raped when I was 14 by, I'll say a man because technically, he was an adult. He was 18. I skipped a couple of grades in school, so I was younger in high school. And this was a high school senior that I had just started dating, had been introduced me from another friend. And sadly, that didn't end very well for me. And I always look back at that. And I'm a big believer in now around developing a healthy level of resilience. And I very much didn't have that, as I said, picking yourself up and moving forward. But a lot of times, I think I just compartmentalize the feelings, emotions, and really didn't process whatever has happened. And so for me, now I can look back on that, and no rape victim should ever be blamed. 

     

    00:11:46 Victoria: So I'm going to say that as I make this next statement. I think I often put myself in a bad situation, when I was younger, to be liked, to be loved, to be accepted. And so some of the ways in which I did that could be considered some riskier behavior and has put myself not in the best situation. And so this was one of those. Again, there's no victim shaming or blaming for this. But at the same time, it's part of what caused me to remember with my mum, who was aware, and we talked through it, like how did this come to be. And I'd, just a couple years before, been hanging out with much older boys. And I think all of that was, again, as I said, just an attempt to feel good and liked and loved and accepted. 

     

    00:12:30 Sabine: I'll thank you so much for sharing this because there was so much wisdom with what you just said, that we do things in our lives, risky things in our lives, that led us to an undesirable experience. But at the same time, we were just trying to do our best, to trying to fit in, trying to be loved because that's our human nature. We want to be loved. We want to fit in. And sometimes, it ends up in a not so good situation. But the most important part, what you also shared is that, “Hey, we have to work through it. And we should not be feeling shamed or blamed, any of the situation.” So I really appreciated that you share that part of it because sometimes, it's being overlooked. It's just like, “Oh, my God, how sad it was.” But we also have to see the whole of a picture. And I believe every situation will make us stronger and leads us to our life's path, where we are now. So bringing us to where you are now, tell us what engages you? What are you passionate about? What drives you today? 

     

    00:14:01 Victoria: So there are a number of things. And what's funny is I put in my email signature line that I made multipotentialite. And that being that I had a ton of different interests and passions that get me motivated and bring me joy. I will say I do enjoy working. My husband jokes that I'm never going to retire. I enjoy the challenge of leading large scale businesses and the complexity of those. After I left the bank and got recruited at 24 to be a COO, my journey from there has been almost exclusively in the business to business, professional services space. And that in itself is complex because you're dealing with corporate clients who pay a bill and either their customers or employees to provide some kind of a service. And so that's, still excites me, the work that I do.

     

    00:14:48 Victoria: But it shifted to getting joy from many, many other things. And so for me, I sit on a multitude of boards or I have over the last many years, a number of which were not the profits, but they align very much with the things that matter to me. One was a national vocational services organization. So you know, new immigrants to the country, that's when I was living in Canada. So new immigrants to Canada or those that were underemployed and helping them find employment. The other one was being a part of Canada's largest child welfare agency. They're fundraising arm, the Children's Aid Foundation. Being the children from the system, I wanted a way to give back. And then I also do that on for profit boards on things that I care about or I think are great opportunities. And I coach and mentor female entrepreneurs. And I have been staunchly committed to a much more diverse and inclusive world, not just the workplaces that I work in, but the communities I live in and in creating safe spaces for people to belong. And so I do a lot of talks. I'm a public speaker, as well. And I talk on a number of those things, leadership, culture, diversity, inclusion, being just some of them.

     

    00:15:57 Sabine: I love it. That's what makes a difference. Each individual person can make a difference by the way they show up. And you show up in so many different ways. If you had a magic wand and you could wish anything to change in this world or in your own life, what would that be? 

     

    00:16:21 Victoria: Hmm. I've always said that when I talk about my children. So I have two children, who are both technically adults now, because my younger one is 18, that my job was to raise two really good humans. And so first and foremost, I work hard. I spent 220 days traveling on the road one year when my children were quite young. And as much as I love that, I love being a mother. What I would change however, is my younger one. If I could bring some of that fairy dust over, my younger one is bipolar and has lots of mental health challenges. And I wish a better life for Jordan, my youngest, and then I could just flick a switch. One of my nicknames in businesses, the turnaround queen, because I fix things. And this is one of those things that I can't fix. So I wish that genie in a bottle to come in and sprinkle some of that dust on my youngest.

     

    00:17:24 Sabine: Oh, that is beautiful. That really shows how much you care. And sometimes dealing with family members, knowing they could be better if ABC would happen, right? But at the end, I believe we all are dealing our own fate. And sometimes, as an outside person or somebody very close, like you as a mother, we might see this as an unfortunate circumstance. But then you never know what comes out of it and why this happens. Maybe this is exactly what she needs to go through right now to later on maybe talk about it, maybe help some other person go through it because she went through it. So I always try to see if I can find the  silver lining to everything. And sometimes, it also means we have to let go of the attachment of that person, right? 

     

    00:18:37 Victoria: Yeah. 

     

    00:18:37 Sabine: Yeah, yeah. 

     

    00:18:39 Victoria: Yeah, it's tough. 

     

    00:18:44 Sabine: Just sprinkle some light, to send some light in this direction because everything is energy. And so for whatever it's worth, I hope that she is getting through there with ease and fast. So, right now, you are also a contributor to a book that was called Unstoppable. What was your contribution to that book? 

     

    00:19:12 Victoria: Yeah, so there were a number of authors who each wrote a chapter for the book. And the funny thing is it was a friend of mine, who had worked with his publisher before, and she got me connected. And when I found out the subject of the book was Unstoppable, about changemakers, who dare to make a difference, that's the full title of the book. I was like, “That is me through and through.” So I was really excited to become part of it. And actually, the publishers decided to make me the first chapter in the book, which felt great. And it was nice to be alongside other Unstoppable individuals, those who have moved and/or made great changes in their or other's lives. 

     

    00:19:54 Sabine: Yeah, that is fantastic. Congratulations. What was the topic that you were talking about?

     

    00:20:00 Victoria: I shared my story. The chapter is called ‘Courage To Live.’ And so I shared some of what I share with you here today in the listening audience and some of the things and advice I would give others around their own courage to live or to be unstoppable. 

     

    00:20:15 Sabine: Oh, wow. I encourage everybody to get that book. And where can they get that book? Can you share your site with our listeners?

     

    00:20:28 Victoria: For sure, and thanks for asking. I have a personal website, which is victoria-pelletier.com. And there, you'll find that, not only the book, but for those who are interested in a public speaker, you'll find samples of me speaking there. And otherwise, I publish regular articles and content, both on my blog and for other news outlets. 

     

    00:20:50 Sabine: Wonderful. And I'll make sure that I put this information into the show notes. If there is one piece of advice you would like to leave our listeners with, what would that be? 

     

    00:21:07 Victoria: I'm a big believer in this notion of control. And therefore, I talk and coach a lot of people about, “You're the CEO, a brand you.” And so taking complete charge of that, whether it's around building a strong personal brand, which I think is critically important for. Even if you're straight out of post secondary, I think it's important to start building a brand there and that tells people who you are, what's your unique value proposition to the world and into business specifically. So you need to control the narrative around that and how you show up. But it also means, when I say CEO of you, that you don't put your career in someone else's hands. You take charge in terms of maintaining your skills and making sure you're relevant for where the market and the world is moving, and not just assuming that your good performance is going to move you to the next level. So really being in charge. And I have the saying, “You don't ask, you don't get.” My children know that well now, but I think that's important. And I'd encourage your listeners to do that for themselves.

     

    00:22:11 Sabine: I love it. You don't ask, you don't get. Yes, I always say, “Ask and you shall  receive.” And that's the truth. I always, always have done that in my life. And I can second that, that this does work. Thank you so much, Victoria, for being here with my listeners sharing your story and your wisdom. So thank you so much. 

     

    00:22:38 Victoria: Thank you. 

     

    00:22:41 Sabine: That was my interview. And if you enjoyed it, give us a five star review. Leave a comment and share it with your friends. Thanks for listening. Until I see you again. Always remember, so from the heart, follow your passion and live the life you imagine.

    Ep.33 Transcended Success - The Way God sees you

    Ep.33 Transcended Success - The Way God sees you

    When you sit in silence, you open yourself up to divine guidance. Denise is multi-passionate and refuses to be put into a box. "If you have many talents, you can serve in various ways.". She shows up using her many gifts to make an impact. Denise shares her story, explaining how you can use your story as your strength. She helps women build a life they love by seeing themselves the way God sees them and embracing their power to be, do, have, and achieve anything they want.

     
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    Ep.23 How to become the leader you are meant to be

    Ep.23 How to become the leader you are meant to be

    II didn’t realize back then what I did. I was only 12 years old. Many years later, I realized that this was the first time I consciously stepped up as a leader to guide a group of lost kids out of the woods. I followed my intuition.
    We all have an inner hero and leader inside of us. The world is ready to see and experience YOUR leadership ability. Whether we lead a nation or one person, we have an important role to play in this life. It's time to muster the courage to step up and become our own leader. I am sharing 5 Ideas that will make you realize what kind of leader you are today.

    Apply for the next Freedom Lifestyle Challenge: https://bit.ly/Freedom_Lifestyle_challenge 

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