children of divorce

So many divorces happen because one spouse follows their desires at the expense of their vows. That happened in the family of my guest today. 

In this episode, we cover:

• How her family’s dysfunction led to struggles with gender and sexuality
• The beautiful transformation she’s experienced and even seen in her parents
• The biggest lie about getting divorced
• A new organization that’s fighting for children’s rights

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Shownotes

Today we’re sharing a podcast where I was interviewed by two therapists, Dr. Bob Schuchts and Jake Khym, on their podcast, Restore the Glory. Joey especially opens up about his struggles in his relationship with God, plus they discuss:

• When we don’t face our wounds, we typically try to outrun them. 
• Since divorce is a wound of broken love, the antidote is authentic love.
• Why it’s so helpful to spend time with a couple who has a healthy marriage. 

Donate to Restored

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Visit Dakota Lane Fitness

Listen to the Restore the Glory podcast

Visit JPII Healing Center

Shownotes

It’s said that Henry David Thoreau once wrote, “Most men lead lives of quiet desperation and go to the grave with the song still in them.” Doesn’t that describe our culture? A culture that’s hooked on comfort and so void of meaning. 

But thankfully, Dr. Andrew and Sarah Swafford have a solution to that problem. In this episode, we discuss:

• What holds us back from lives and relationships full of meaning?
• What’s needed to live a life of meaning and happiness?
• How do we navigate the dating scene today?
• How can you heal your brokenness?

If you’ve ever felt that ache of wanting more from life, don’t miss this episode.

Buy the Book: Gift & Grit: How Heroic Virtue Can Change Your Life and Relationships

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Shownotes

When your parents divorce, you almost always lose one or both parents physically or emotionally. But as our guest today says, we’re not meant to go through life without the mentorship of a father and a mother. 

In this episode, Nicole Rodriguez shares the immense healing she’s experienced through parents who were not her own. We also discuss:

• How her parents’ divorce started with infidelity and led her to feeling abandoned and lonely
• The emotional numbness and skepticism toward emotion that she experienced
• How she felt doomed to repeat the cycle of dysfunction and divorce, but thankfully overcame that

Buy the Book: Undone: Freeing Your Feminine Heart from the Knots of Fear and Shame

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Trauma, such as your parents’ divorce or extreme family dysfunction, doesn’t only affect your emotions. It affects your body too. It quite literally has physical effects. 

In this episode, Dr. Christopher Genn, a physical therapist and expert in applied kinesiology, explains how our bodies respond to trauma and how we can heal. Plus, we discuss:

• A new therapy to treat pain, trauma, and even rewire bad habits
• The story of a girl enduring her parents’ divorce who became physically debilitated 
• How we often lie to ourselves about our families, parents, and past - and why that’s a barrier to healing

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Get the Course: Broken to Whole

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Shownotes

In this episode, you'll hear highlight clips from the podcast in 2023. This episode, and the entire podcast, will help you heal from the trauma of your parents’ divorce, separation, or broken marriage, so you can break the cycle. 

If you’re new to the podcast, this is the perfect way to sample our content and learn how it will help you. If you’re a longtime listener, this is the perfect episode to share with someone you know who needs to hear it.

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Shownotes

There’s an extremely popular lie about how divorce affects the children. In this episode, we discuss that lie with my guest who is an only child from a divorced family, plus:

• The loneliness, addiction, and social problems that stemmed from his family’s breakdown
• The anger and even hatred he felt toward his parents and how he feels now
• A unique thing he and his wife did before they were married to strengthen their relationship

Get the Book or First Chapters: It’s Not Your Fault

Get the FREE Guide: 5 Tips to Navigate the Holidays in a Broken Family

Shownotes

If there were 10 things you can do to make therapy succeed (or fail), would you want to know them? I know I would. 

In this episode, a therapist joins us to share those tips, plus: 

• The goal of therapy and the temptation to idealize healing
• A tool for dealing with troubling thoughts
• The struggle to put words to your own emotions and experiences of brokenness

If you’ve ever been to therapy and it hasn’t gone well or you’re considering therapy but you’re unsure how to make it successful, this episode is for you.

Schedule a Free Consult at St. Raphael Counseling

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If you’re from a broken family, the holidays often bring more stress and challenges than joy. After my parents separated, I faced these challenges:

• A sad, pit-in-the-stomach reminder of my parents’ split and my family’s brokenness
• Pressure to choose between parents and balance time amid many events
• A misled desire to make everyone happy, especially my parents, often at my expense
• My emotions or other people being in control instead of me
• Feeling alone and uncertain of how to deal with it all

If that sounds familiar, this episode is for you. In it, you’ll get 5 tips to navigate the challenges and hopefully, even begin enjoying the holidays again. Using them won’t make your holidays look like a Hallmark movie, but they will improve the experience by putting you in the driver’s seat.

Get the FREE Guide: 5 Tips to Navigate the Holidays in a Broken Family

Shownotes

If you’re from a broken family and you’ve struggled with OCD, relationships, overthinking, and filling a parent role for your siblings or parents, this episode is for you.

In it, Ashton shares how her parents’ divorce has affected her and her relationships. She also talks about what’s helped her heal and even offers some advice for you.

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How has Restored helped you?

Shownotes

When trauma occurs, it causes you to ask big questions. That’s where my guest found himself after being brutally attacked, almost to the point of death, by people he was trying to help. 

In this episode, you’ll hear the story of the attack, plus he answers:

• Has forgiveness been difficult for you?
• Why forgive? What are the benefits? What happens if we don’t forgive?
• How do you forgive someone who has hurt you?

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Shownotes

When you’re struggling with unwanted sexual behavior, asking for help is terrifying. The struggle feels so shameful and admitting your weakness feels humiliating. As a result, most men stay stuck for years and years. 

Thankfully, there’s a way out. Asking for help from the right people is the key to overcoming shame, humiliation, and unwanted behavior. Today, a coach specializing in helping men break free from unwanted sexual behavior joins the show to discuss: 

• Is freedom even possible? 
• Why do men deserve that freedom?
• A valuable for you or men you know struggling
• Stories of transformation in the lives of the men he’s coached
• Advice and encouragement for any man struggling right now

Apply for Freedom Coaching

Get FREE Mini-Course: Why You Feel Broken
Listen to the Series: Healing Sexual Brokenness

Shownotes

If you’re a woman that struggles with unwanted sexual behavior, you are not alone. The myth of porn, or even lust, being a male problem is just that - a myth. More importantly, healing and freedom are within reach for you. 

In this episode, brave author and speaker Rachael Killackey shares her struggles with unwanted sexual behavior and a valuable resource for women struggling, plus:

• The emotions that sexual struggles brought into her life
• How she found freedom and helps other women now, too
• How you should respond if you have a relapse

Buy Rachael’s Book: Love in Recovery: One Woman's Story of Breaking Free from Shame and Healing from Pornography Addiction

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Listen to the Series: Healing Sexual Brokenness

Shownotes

Our world is very sexually broken. The examples are endless: Pornography use, sexual compulsions, addictions, hookup culture, paying for sex, infidelity, sex trafficking, and much more.

But how did our world become so sexually broken? 

That’s the topic we tackle today with famous author and speaker Christopher West. If you’ve wrestled with sexual brokenness or noticed an ache inside that you that nothing seems to fill, this episode is for you.

Image 1: Three Choices
Image 2: Wall Unity Crucifix

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Shownotes

What happens inside your brain and your body when you endure trauma?

Surprisingly, there’s actually a predictable way that your body and mind responds to trauma. In this episode, we break down each response with a trauma therapist. We also discuss:

• How her parents’ divorce impacted her
• Is healing trauma even possible? If so, what does it take to heal?
• How to apologize the right way

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Find a therapist

Shownotes

What if I told you that your sexual struggles could be predicted by your untreated trauma?

Today, we’re joined by author Jay Stringer who studied ~4,000 men and women who struggle with sexual compulsion or addiction, such porn, masturbation, affairs, buying sex, and much more. 

In this episode, we breakdown his NEW study and more:

• How the sexual fantasies and porn searches of the study participants could be predicted by their untreated trauma
• Why we often repeat behavior that harmed us, such as sexual abuse or affairs, and how to avoid that
• How anger actually drives unwanted sexual behavior
• Why people from rigid or disengaged families are much more likely to struggle with sexual compulsion or addiction
• How in order to break free, you have to listen to your lust and understand why you struggle in the particular ways that you do
• Why typical lust management strategies like accountability software are not enough

Whether you struggle with sexual brokenness or know someone who does, this episode will help anyone find healing and lasting freedom from sexual brokenness.

Buy Jay’s Book: Unwanted: How Sexual Brokenness Reveals Our Way to Healing

Get FREE Unwanted Chapters

Get FREE Mini-Course: Why You Feel Broken

Listen to the Series: Healing Sexual Brokenness

Shownotes

When it comes to pornography, there are basically two types of people:

• Those who believe that porn is wrong and harmful. 
• And those who do not.

But beyond the arguments, millions of people struggle with a pornography compulsion or addiction. They want to break free, but they feel stuck and hopeless. No matter what they try, it doesn’t work.

In this episode, popular speakers and authors Matt Fradd and Jason Evert join me to answer these tough questions: 

• Is porn harmful and wrong? If so, why? 
• What does it do your brain and your relationships?
• How do you actually break free from porn?
• What resources are out there to help you or someone you care about?

Buy the Book: Forged: 33 Days Toward Freedom by Jason Evert and Matt Fradd

Buy the Book: The Porn Myth: Exposing the Reality Behind the Fantasy of Pornography by Matt Fradd

Get the FREE Mini-Course: Why You Feel Broken

Listen to the Series: Healing Sexual Brokenness

Shownotes

What’s brought the most pain and problems into your life? If your answer (or a top answer) is your parents’ divorce or the breakdown of your family, this podcast is for you.

In this episode, we talk about the specific pain and problems your parents’ divorce or family breakdown bring into your life. We also highlight resources to help you heal and build virtue, so you can feel whole again and break the cycle of dysfunction and divorce in your own life.

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Millions of people right now are struggling with sexual compulsion and addiction. It’s a massive problem that doesn’t get the attention or resources it deserves.

Thankfully, in this episode, psychologist Dr. Bob Schuchts offers steps and a resource to heal your sexual brokenness. We also discuss:

• A story of profound healing and transformation
• Dr. Bob’s own past struggles in this area
• How sexual brokenness is often passed down in families through generations

Buy Dr. Bob’s Book: Be Restored

Get the FREE Mini-Course: Why You Feel Broken

Listen to the Series: Healing Sexual Brokenness

Shownotes