debra fileta

This week, we're taking an in-depth look at the signs that indicate for all intents and purposes, that we're stuck in the past. But to that, we're going to talk about how to get past the past with therapist, coach, speaker, and author, Jason VanRuler, whose goal is to speak truth and grace into the life of every person he works with.

Dive Deeper:

If you enjoy this episode with Ian, I'm sure you'll also enjoy:

• 353: Albert Tate on Adjusting Our Relationship with Pain & Failure, Stunting Our Emotional Growth, and What it Means to Do the Work of Untangling Our Dysfunctional Relationship with Pain
• 360: Dr. John Delony on The Cost of Living a Borrowed Life, Outsourcing Vulnerability, Practicing Resilience and Courage, and Why a Curated Life is a Fake Life

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Episode Links:

Jason’s Website | Instagram | Facebook

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Ever wondered why you can’t break a habit you hate or form a new one you want to start? Today’s bonus episode is for you! Debra Fileta always brings wisdom and practical tools to help us connect spiritual practices with mental health and relationship health, and we’re delighted to have Debra back on the podcast with us today. We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage. 

Episode highlights include: 

• Why issues seem to surface at unexpected times and what you can do about it

• The equation that leads to lasting change - and why most people get it wrong 

• How to effectively begin to break bad habits  

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

RESOURCES

• Debra has also been on these past episodes: 

• Choosing Marriage: Interview with Debra Fileta | Ep. 207

• Love In Every Season: Interview with Debra Fileta | Ep. 411

• Are You Really OK? With Special Guest Debra Fileta | Ep. 471

• Oneness Vs. Codependency - What's the Difference? With Special Guest Debra Fileta | Ep. 511

• We think you’ll love Debra’s new book, RESET: Powerful Habits to Own Your Thoughts, Understand Your Feelings, and Change Your Life

• Are you getting the Marriage Multiplier? It’s a quick weekly email from Dr. Kim that gives you ways to intentionally invest in your marriage. Sign up HERE. 

Sometimes our unhealthy habits can hold us back from fully relying on the Lord and walking in the renewed strength that He provides. Our guest today, Debra Fileta, author of the new book, Reset: Powerful Habits to Own Your Thoughts, Understand Your Feelings, and Change Your Life, is here to share tools rooted in God’s Word that we can apply to our lives to break free from old habits that might be holding us back from real Spiritual growth.

You will learn:
·         To depend on God instead of your own willpower
·         To change old ways of thinking
·         Tools rooted in God’s Word to break free from old habits

Book: Reset
Website
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Email us at podcast@coffeeandbibletime.com

Thanks for listening to Coffee and Bible Time, where our goal is to help people delight in God's Word and thrive in Christian living!

Debra Fileta is a passionate woman of faith, dedicated to Jesus. As a licensed professional counselor, speaker, and author, she specializes in dating, marriage, and relationship issues. Debra has written several books, including True Love Dates, Choosing Marriage, Love in Every Season!, Are You Really Ok?, Married Sex, and RESET. She hosts the Love + Relationships Podcast, offering relationship advice to callers. Her influential blog, TrueLoveDates.com, promotes healthy relationships and reaches millions annually. Debra is also the founder of the Debra Fileta Counselors Network, offering online counseling sessions.

LINKS:

• WEBSITE: DebraFileta.com
• INSTAGRAM: @DebraFileta

How do you identify the signs of depression? The warning flags might look different than you think. In this episode, licensed professional counselor, speaker, and author Deb Fileta shares how to heal—and help others heal—from depression and anxiety.

So Good Moments: 

• The truth about counseling and medication when it comes to depression.
• How to get our minds and bodies on a pathway toward healing.
• How to assess the severity of depression. 
• Pastor Julie’s journey identifying the warning signs of anxiety.
• The importance of community in our journey of healing. 
• What’s helpful (and not helpful) when walking alongside someone who is struggling. 

Resources: 

Are You Really Okay? Book

Debra’s Website 

Share Your Story With Us!

Learn more about Sisterhood | https://christfellowship.church/groups/sisterhood 

Ask a Question

Discussion Questions: 

• Have you ever struggled with depression or anxiety—or have you known someone who struggled? What was the level of severity (as Deb described)? 
• What stood out to you about getting your mind and body on a pathway of healing? 
• Why is community so important to someone who might be struggling? How has community helped you during hard times?
• Deb shared a list of what is helpful and not helpful for someone struggling with depression. Is there anything you would add to the list?

Tune in as Debra gives steps that allow either spouse to help the marriage improve. 

We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage! 

Subscribe to Podcast Email to make sure you never miss an episode and get noteworthy quotes, resources, and more delivered straight to your inbox! 

*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here! 

RESOURCES

• Debra’s book, Are You Really OK? walks you through tending to the areas of health we talked about in today’s episode. 
• Our 31 Reasons Why I Love You love notes resource helps you share the loving thoughts you have about your spouse in a fun and easy way. 
• We can too easily let our married sex grow mundane or stale. That’s why we created the Spice it Up Sex Challenge. This resource gives you 18 fun and spicy challenges to work toward together to help bring back the fun and passion!
• Dr. Kim’s book, 7 Secrets to an Awesome Marriage gives you 7 of his time-tested insights to make your marriage all you want it to be. 

“God’s love is so different from the relationships we have in this world, where there’s always the expectation of giving and receiving. God is love. He is the epitome of love. There’s nothing I have to do to engage in the process, or give back. I just receive it. It’s almost hard for the brain to compute, but there’s something really special about that.” — Debra Fileta

This month’s memory verse: “And so we know and rely on the love God has for us. God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in them.” — 1 John 4:16

Today’s podcast: Natalie and Debra are digging into our verse for this month: 1 John 4:16. Listen in for a conversation about what it means that God is love, how Jesus comes to give us a new identity in him, and the absolute confidence we can have in the love of God for us.

Our February Dwell guest: Meet Debra Fileta, a Licensed Professional Counselor and the author of 5 books on the topics of dating, marriage, love, and healthy relationships (see links below).  Her heart for Jesus informs her work, her writing, and her conversation with us about what love is.

Memorize Scripture with us: Find out more about Dwell’s monthly kit with temporary tattoos, a display card, a keychain ring, and more to help you know and dwell on God’s Word.

Get our weekly devotional email:  Dive deeper into this month’s verse.

Did you love today’s episode?: We’d love to hear about it! Leave a rating or review in your podcast player to help others find the show.

Links from today's show:
Meet Debra Fileta
Books by Debra
Debra's podcast : Love + Relationships

Meet our February Dwell Guest: Debra Fileta! Debra is a Licensed Professional Counselor and the author of 5 books on the topics of dating, marriage, love, and healthy relationships (see link below).  Her heart for Jesus informs her work, her writing, and her conversation with us this month about what love is.

Here's what we're talking about today!
-Ways to know God's love
-Defining and recognizing transference
-Examples from Debra's work as a counselor
-Healing from our past
-Having a right understanding of who God is
-The impact of "The Hungry Monster" of dissatisfaction

Links from today's show:
Meet Debra Fileta
Books by Debra
Debra's podcast : Love + Relationships

A n d // s o // w e // k n o w
a n d // r e l y // o n 
t h e // l o v e // G o d // h a s
f o r // u s.
G o d // i s // l o v e.
W h o e v e r // l i v e s // i n // l o v e
l i v e s // i n // G o d,
a n d // G o d // i n // t h e m.

1  j o h n // 4 : 1 6

Meet our February Dwell Guest: Debra Fileta! Debra is a Licensed Professional Counselor and the author of 5 books on the topics of dating, marriage, love, and healthy relationships (see link below).  Her heart for Jesus informs her work, her writing, and her conversation with us this month about what love is.

Here's what we're talking about today!
-How healthy people make healthy relationships
-"Ah-ha!" moments in counseling and in ministry
-Seeing psychology in Scripture
-Using our ability to love as a gage for our own spiritual health

Links from today's show:
Meet Debra Fileta
Books by Debra
Debra's podcast : Love + Relationships

A n d // s o // w e // k n o w
a n d // r e l y // o n 
t h e // l o v e // G o d // h a s
f o r // u s.
G o d // i s // l o v e.
W h o e v e r // l i v e s // i n // l o v e
l i v e s // i n // G o d,
a n d // G o d // i n // t h e m.

1  j o h n // 4 : 1 6

Most believers assume that when they put their trust in Jesus, they will automatically be healthy emotionally, but it is actually a lifelong process. If we don't learn to take care of our emotional and mental health, it will affect our relationships and many other areas of our lives in negative ways.

Debra Fileta is a licensed counselor, and she challenges us to take an honest look at how we’re really doing, and helps us understand our emotions, get to the root of what we believe about God, and recognize where we might need healing. This will help us in every area of our life to live more fulfilled and free.

Pick up Debra's book "Are You Really Okay?” here: amazon.com/Are-You-Really-OK-Getting-ebook/dp/B08SJL2MPJ/. Pick up Matt's book "Truth Plus Love” here: amazon.com/Truth-Plus-Love-Jesus-Influence/dp/0310355249/.

For more from Matt Brown, and to receive our free e-book “5 Spiritual Keys to Find Fulfillment in God” go to: Thinke.org

Mark Elfstrand talks with relationship counselor Debra Fileta about the growing trend, even among believers, in prenuptial agreements and the importance of trust in relationships.

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