news and politics

1- Biden without Obama?
2- First Power the Policy
3- Disney CEO is richer than Iron Man
4- Hire your own lawyer
5- I didn’t know breaking the law was illegal
6- Wait, the law applies to me too? But I was just being racist.
7- Move the campus? No move your ass.
8- W.W.A. Women Whipping Ass
9- "Jesus socks! Get your Jesus socks here!"

1– Forget Mueller, Get elected
2– J.G. Wentworth, get your money now
3– A.O.C. and the science of a takedown
4– Jussie, W.T.F.?!
5– Tournament Time
6– Let's play nice

1- Glad he didn’t know my secrets
2- No f**ks given
3- Black friend for hire
4- Guarantee your loss to AOC
5- Kid sex: Sadly, it' a thing.
6- DO NOT order the salsa extra spicy

1- New Mac, old problems
2- It's raining
3- Trump, Pelosi. Pelosi, Trump.
4- Single issue luxury
5- Rolls Royce luxury
6- Thank you, Ms. Cortez.
7- Thank you, government workers.
8- 27 lbs. of mac and cheese... Only in ‘merica.
9- The best a man can get?
10- I’m gonna name my podcast after Obama too

1 - Buy the Wall, Buy the Wall
2 - Tucker advertisers not dirty
3 - Hate is a real consequence
4 - Mar A Lago is a mar a dump
5 - Banking While Black
6 - $7 is charity, right?
7 - Toys for kids is real charity
8 - What they think of us
9 - RIP and thank you, Ms. Marshall

1– It may be bad but he’ll make it worse.
2- Damn that Helen Keller.
3- My racism isn’t racist.
4- Skinhead resume.
5- Thank you, Dr. Phil.
6- Yoga is out to get you.
7- Unreal speed, Kenya, I salute you.

1- “Don’t monkey this up.” You just did.
2- Not qualified at all. Welcome to the administration!
3- The accountant is ready to talk.
4- Leave my wife out of it, even though I said she did it.
5- Mass shooting again...
6- Cop found… guilty?
7- Hey, officers, there’s money in killin' them negroes.
8- Mollie Tibbetts and Nia Wilson both matter.
9- Aretha Franklin, Neil Simon, and John McCain. We miss you all.
10- Tiger loses off the course again
11- Serena, you are a super hero. Wear what you want.

1 – Armando Frank was killed on YouTube. No indictment necessary.
2 – LeBron opened a school. People got mad. What The Fuck?!
3 – Don’t count your chickens, or Ostrich as the case may be.
4 – Wilbur Ross is pulling a Madoff
5 – Trump tweets beyond… oh screw it, he’s at it again.
6 – I lost my invisible plane again. Damn Where did I park it?
7 – Q Anon is coming or maybe… it's here.
8 – Nia Wilson. Say Her Name.
9 – The NRA is crying snowflake tears.
10 – The only thing worse than being called a racist is being a stupid racist.

1. This decision makes sense. Just ask God.
2. Benefits! Get your free benefits here!
3. You will be sentenced to 30 years.
4. Horrible women
5. Permit Patty, Mike Huckabee, and other non-racist racists.
6. Life in the poor lane
7. Tweet of the Week

1- Hello, Officer, there's an NFL playing burglar outside.
2- If Canada is angry, it's you, not Canada.
3- Will they or won't they? Only Singapore knows.
4 - Piece of cake as long as it's not gay cake.
5- Welcome, champions. Well not you, or you, or those guys.
6- Tweet of the week

1- So while I was porn-- I mean, Storm surfing...
2- Too big to fail? Let's get smaller.
3- Make my wall a fence.
4- There's got to be a lazy one around here somewhere.
5- We will return after March Madness. Hey, who broke my bracket?

1- Unplugged and I like it.
2- Little said, Nothing done.
3- School shooting again.
4- "Backpacks! Got those bulletproof backpacks here!"
5- I’m not sure who’s insane: him or US.
6- I’m going to Wakanda.
7- Black Panther All Star Game.

1- Dial Up News.
2- State of the Union.
3- Obama, would you stop it?
4- Today, I’m a Philly fan.
5 - Dry land is in my future.

1- Shut 'em down.
2- My grandfather had the answer.
3- Making America great again costs money.
4- We fold.
5- I’m 6’3, 239 lbs. Real news of fake weight.
6- Will someone tell tubby the women were marching against him.
7- What’s wrong with the racist misogynistic party I supported?
8. Wanna borrow some cash?

1- Smart people are too smart to say it.
2- You didn’t believe that wall story, did you?
3- You wanted the con.
4- Nice, sweet racists.
5- "We was just bein' ‘Merikkkan."
6- A tough job to do well.
7- Ain't easy being white.

1- I’m wrong. Thank you, Alabama.
2- They cry voter fraud because none of their disenfranchisement worked.
3- Trump unfit to clean toilets. We knew it, but it's still nice to hear.
4- Fear is down and so are gun prices.
5- Viral video = cash. Hmmm...
6- Happy Holidays, Ivanka.

1. I’m back from vacation.
2. Citizen of the Year.
3. Lookin' for the good.
4. Trickle down again.
5. International House of Twitter Feuds.
6. Vigorous Denial.
7. It's ok. Joseph was 107 when he met Mary.
8. This week in sexual harassment.
9. Is it worth it? Ahhh, just blame Hillary.
10. Clippers losing, Trickle Down Economics: Welcome to the bad 80’s.

1– Misdirection worked.
2- Respect the flag (available on t-shirts, boxers, or briefs)!
3- Dan Gilbert offended by those more racist than he.
4- President's Cup dedicated to Puerto Rico but not filled with drinking water.
5– Michael Che killed it, bitches.
6- 8 years? Not one N bomb?
7– The Juice is Loose.

1- Take a knee.
2- Pop is WOKE.
3- Sadly, Katrina is now Puerto Rican.
4- Russians Emails? Puerto Rico? Health Care? Nope, let's cry about football.

1- Have a wonderful flood!
2- That’s what the Government does.
3- Lock the church, there’s a flood out there.
4- The Big Lie is just that.
5- Don’t take away my dream.
6- My sword is bigger than yours.