33. Sick of Gratitude Lists? Try My Shit List

I wanted to share a difficulty that I have been struggling with the last month and how I was able to manage some hard, even shameful emotions that came up for me. When my kids' father got sick and ended up in the hospital for the last month I had to accept my new role as a single mom, without the help of a co-parent.

In this episode I discuss the stages of grief I went through, including some anger and resentment that I was not proud of. I also discuss the shift I was able to make from fear and anger towards service, an old recovery tool that helped give me perspective on my loss and how I can focus my attention on the needs of others. 

Email me at kate@restoryatherapy.com

For more about my narrative work and to work with me: www.restoryatherapy.com

Art, exhibitions, and products: www.katemarlene.com

Facebook: Kate Marlene/Restorya
IG: @katemarleo

Love stories captivate all of us, but how do narratives of love influence how we date, make meaning, and tell our own stories? What do we look for in the love stories of our own lives and how do larger narratives about love influence how we pursue and experience romance?

In this episode, I interview Olivia de Recat, author, illustrator, and cartoonist for the New Yorker. Her book Drawn Together was named one of the best books of the Year by the New Yorker in 2022. This book was absolutely beautiful, truly hilarious, and a vulnerable look at romantic love stories in all shapes  It’s a collection of illustrated love stories, but also a kind of memoir that looks at Olivia’s relationship to love and relationships. I wanted to talk to her about her book, and how relationships are shaped by the love stories we know and tell.

Kate

IG @katemarleo

www.restoryatherapy.com

Find Olivia 

IG @drawingolive

www.oliviaderecat.com

Being sick can have a negative impact on our sense of self and mental well-being. Do you feel unproductive, unable to be a good parent, or isolated and lonely when you're sick? When we are ill, a myriad of stories, beliefs, and negative associations can surface. These stories can impact our sense of self and, in my case, even lead to questioning my ability to work or be a good parent, fostering self-doubt and blame.

To stop negative self-reflection during illness we must detach our identities and self-worth from the condition. It's about seeing the illness objectively, as something separate from who we are. Today, I want to share my story and offer insights that could provide support to anyone facing illness, whether it's a common cold, flu, or something more serious and chronic.

If you're interested in sessions with me you can book at www.restoryatherapy.com

Find me IG: @katerestorya

Facebook: Kate Marlene/Restorya Therapy

TikTok: KateMarlene

One of the greatest pains we will ever endure in life is heartache, either from a break-up, rejection, divorce, or the severance of a relationship. In this episode I talked with Janice Formicella, a break-up coach and host of the podcast, "Break-ups, Broken Hearts, and Moving On." We talked about recovery from our own divorce and other break-ups, withdrawal after break-up, the power of no-contact, and how to use the pain of a break-up to fuel personal growth at any stage of life. We also talk about the power of narrative, understanding the self, and shifting our narratives around break-ups towards empowerment.  

Kate Marlene Leone is a narrative therapist and works with clients internationally. More information at www.restoryatherapy.com

IG: @katerestorya
TikTok: @katemarlene

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Almost exactly 20 years ago I got pregnant. I was still in college and my boyfriend at the time was getting ready to start a Ph.D. at Harvard. We had big life dreams, that for both of us, seemed inevitable, not to be disrupted by an unexpected pregnancy.

A couple years ago I met up with Jeremie when we were both in Paris and he agreed to let me record this conversation about what happened, our relationship, and how our lives were impacted. I want to clarify firstly, this is not an anti-abortion narrative, however it is a conversation about “what-ifs” and it’s something I would do regarding any large life decision as great as this one.

I have to say I was a bit shocked learning about his feelings at the time and even in hindsight. There were a lot of things we never said, until now, and I think the conversation reflects more broadly on middle-age look backs, life choices, and the way our perspectives and learnings can change over time.

Again, it’s a story about stories. The stories we tell, the stories we may have forgotten, and the stories of what-if.

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About Face is produced by me, Kate Marlene and is part of my larger project, Restorya, a narrative therapy practice based in Berlin. 

If you are interested in booking a session with me, please go to www.restoryatherapy.com for more information about my work.

You can also follow me on Facebook at Kate/Restorya

Instagram: @katerestorya

TikTok: @katemarlene

Music from this episode is an intentional flashback by Modest Mouse, my favorite band in college. 

Any time we try to convince others of our truth and convictions we lose power. When I got divorced I heard a lot of rumors about myself-- I'm crazy, left my husband for a younger boyfriend, etc. This experience taught me a lot about how to stand in my own power and truth and to not let myself be vulnerable to the thoughts and opinions of others.

I got on a dating app in 2012 and met my now ex-husband. Now I have two German kids and I can't leave the country! On a bad day this really gets be down, however, it has taught me a lot about the power of reimagining possibility within the very real limitations of our lives and circumstances. This episode is for anyone who has felt held back back or "stuck" because of circumstances, past decisions, and the consequences of just living our lives. Reimagine your limitations with real hope, possbility, and space for growth.