46 - Unintended Consequences of Pushing for Good Grades

Kids of all ages need to feel connected and loved unconditionally.  How can you set up a system in your family for creating and keeping those connections?  In this podcast we go over connections for kids between 2 and 10.  The next podcast covers what you can do for teens and tweens, a much harder demographic than younger kids who still think the world of you. 

In this episode we explore ideas on how to have regular "quick" connections on a daily or weekly basis while also considering longer "dates" with our kids.  We talk about how the intention is for each parent to have one-on-one time with each kid in their family. 

There are examples of how some families have accomplished this as well as resources for ideas on what to do for "short" connections as well as times to connect in longer, more meaningful ways.

The goal is to set up connections that can go deep and will continue on into their tween and teen years. 

Hint:  Start young! 

Resources for this podcast:
30 Joyful Ways to Connect by OneTimeThrough
56 Ways to Connect With Your Kids by TalkingParents.com

Email me at mary@parentingdecoded.com or go to my website at www.parentingdecoded.com.

Have a blessed rest of your day!

Grumpy kids can really put your home into a foul mood.  What can we do to help tame these dark clouds and bring some sunshine back into our lives?

In this episode we'll cover these four steps:

Step 1 – Keep Your Cool 

Step 2 – Offer Empathy and Hugs 

Step 3 - Fix the Broken Connection 

Step 4 – Go on a Trigger Quest and Brainstorm

The transcript for this episode is HERE

Here are the resources mentioned in the podcast:

• Kings Corner Card Game YouTube Instruction Video 
• Mood Meter Graphic 

Parenting Decoded YouTube Videos 

• Communicating with Teens and Tweens Parenting Decoded YouTube Video 
• Getting Kids to Listen 
• Being a Calm Parent 

Parenting Decoded Podcast Link 

• Anger Management for Parents 

Email me at mary@parentingdecoded.com or go to my website at www.parentingdecoded.com.

Have a blessed rest of your day!

Parents struggle with how to motivate their children toward certain behaviors. Typically rewards and bribes are used. 

In this episode learn about when bribes and rewards are most likely to motivate your child.  There are pros and cons of both types of motivations.  Bribes tend to reinforce negative behaviors, while rewards are commonly thought of as something that's planned ahead and well-thought-out, used for positive behaviors. 

However, sometimes our plans backfire!  When? How? What do we do?  Listen and learn!

Click HERE for a written transcript on my website. 

Email me at mary@parentingdecoded.com or go to my website at www.parentingdecoded.com.

Have a blessed rest of your day!

Kids being bullied isn't new.  What's new is the extent at which they are being bullied and, with the internet, in new and harmful ways.  

In this episode, we'll cover the different types of bullying:
Verbal - teasing, name-calling, taunting, etc.,
Social - spreading rumors, leaving kids out, embarrassing them, etc.
Physical - hitting, spitting, tripping, etc. 
Cyberbullying - using digital devices to cause others harm

Why does bullying occur?

What can families do?

How you can role-play and brainstorm with your child.  

Here are resources referenced in the podcast that are also on the transcript that is available and on my website blog:

·       https://router-network.com/education/anti-bullying-guide

·       https://kidshealth.org/en/parents/bullies.html

·       https://www.pacer.org/bullying/

·       https://www.stopbullying.gov/

Email me at mary@parentingdecoded.com or go to my website at www.parentingdecoded.com.

Have a blessed rest of your day!

Do you have an anxious child?   Does it worry you or drive you crazy?  Either way you need to listen to this podcast!

In this podcast, hear from Stephanie Pinto, founder of Let’s Raise Emotionally Intelligent Kids and author of the best-selling book From Chaos to Connection.   We talk about how parents can support their kids who have anxiety.  

Learn about the 4 different types of anxiety, then the 4 parenting traps that we fall into when we attempt to "help" that wind up having negative impacts.

• Being over reassuring
• Swooping in/Jumping in too soon
• Allowing avoidance
• Being too tough or critical

What can we do to help?  Listen in!

Find Stephanie and her resources at www.Stephaniepinto.com. She’s amazing!

Here’s a link to her FACEBOOK and INSTAGRAM if you’d like to follow her. 

Email me at mary@parentingdecoded.com or go to my website at www.parentingdecoded.com.

Have a blessed rest of your day!

Today with the launch of the Barbie movie and so much emphasis on selfies and having perfect bodies, it's worth considering how we help out the millions of kids who aren't "perfect". 

In this episode I interview Pam Luk, Founder of Ember & Ace, a clothing brand for plus-sized kids.  We talk about how to support our kids both socially and emotionally as well as how we as parents need to tamp down our own feelings about perfection that harm our kids in emotional ways that hurt more than help.

Here is a link to Ember & Ace if you'd like to take a peek at their offerings and learn more about them:
https://www.emberandace.com/

Email me at mary@parentingdecoded.com or go to my website at www.parentingdecoded.com.

Have a blessed rest of your day!

What do you with kids who are wired differently?   Who might be on the spectrum (ADHD, Asperger's, OCD, etc.)?  Maybe they've had a diagnosis, maybe you just can see they are off the charts brilliant and some things but a total failure at socializing with kids their age. 

If you have such challenges with your kids,  take a listen to Sam Young of Young Scholars Academy in this episode as he explains how his online community for neurodivergent and gifted children works.  He brings a strength-based approach to getting our kids to connect in healthy, positive ways while learning at the same time.   Lots of topics for kids to connect in small group classes with mentors who help them connect while teaching.  What a concept, like minded-students can finally find "their people"!

Young Scholars Academy can be found at YOUNG SCHOLARS ACADEMY.

A list of their classes for FALL 2023 is at FALL 2023 COURSES.  If you listen and need this link after Fall 2023,  just go to the main website and choose "Courses" from the main menu.

For anyone listening, there's a special discount of 15% off any classes booked for first-time students! 

Use Code: YSAPARENTINGDECODED15

Email me at mary@parentingdecoded.com or go to my website at www.parentingdecoded.com.

Have a blessed rest of your day!

Some kids seem to be born not caring where stuff is.  They rely on us to find things and if we can't find them they blame US!  Yikes! 

This episode gives you ideas about how to let go of the responsibility for items in our kids lives that should be THEIRS but seem to have become OURS.  

Learn how to keep a calm head as we turn over the job of owning "stuff" back to our kids in loving ways.  

Email me at mary@parentingdecoded.com or go to my website at www.parentingdecoded.com.

Have a blessed rest of your day!

Most parents seem to get hit with this at some point in our parenting journey.  It can start at around 6-7 months and usually goes away gradually throughout early childhood.  But… sometimes we’re just put to the test with separation issues and we wish someone would let us know what’s normal, what’s extreme and give us some ideas about what to do.

In this podcast we have Jessica O’Connor, LMFT, a licensed marriage and family therapist to help step us through ideas in dealing with separation at different ages and stages.

For more details about separation anxiety and what do to:
LINK TO BLOG FOR PODCAST 56

To reach Jessica O'Connor:
www.jessicaoconnor.org

Lastly,  if you are having issues in dealing with yourself or your child please reach out to the 24/7 National Helpline for Substance abuse and mental health services administration 1-800-662-HELP (4357).

Email me at mary@parentingdecoded.com or go to my website at www.parentingdecoded.com.

Have a blessed rest of your day!

Listen to Heath Wilson, co-founder of Aro, talk about their innovative technology that helps families develop good screen habits in a positive and fun way. 

There's a smart tech "box" to hold your devices when families decide to have non-tech time and an app that will track how long technology has been in the box.  It's the complete opposite of our normal "get off your device" that many families fight about now,! This is more like: "hey, how fun to see how long you been off your device" twist! 

You can use the app to have contests with both adults and kids and even track what you were doing while your devices have been in the box.  So cool! 

Here's a link :  GOARO.COM

I have a few other podcasts mentioned that can help parents looking for more info in dealing with screen time :
Podcast 11: Screen Time Issues - Part 1 
                            ages preschool through elementary
Podcast 12: Screen Time Issues - Part 2
                           ages middle to high school
Podcast 44:  Screen Time Struggles 
                           how to deal with screen addictions with Emily Cherkin

Email me at mary@parentingdecoded.com or go to my website at www.parentingdecoded.com.

Have a blessed rest of your day!