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    63. How to Live a Little Happier with Dr. Laurie Santos

    enJanuary 20, 2022

    Podcast Summary

    • Revolutionizing solutions in their industries3rdlove introduces half cup sizes and a virtual fitting room to solve bra fitting issues, while Pampers offers Swaddlers diapers and gentle wipes for baby skin care.

      Both 3rdlove and Pampers offer solutions to common problems in their respective industries. 3rdlove revolutionized the bra industry by introducing half cup sizes and a virtual fitting room, solving the problems of size exclusivity and guessing what bra fits best. Pampers, on the other hand, addresses the issue of keeping babies' skin healthy and dry with their Swaddlers diapers and free and gentle wipes. These companies understand the importance of providing solutions to common problems and have gained the trust and recommendation of experts and consumers alike. Whether it's finding a comfortable and stylish bra or ensuring gentle and effective diaper care for a baby, these brands have got you covered. So, visit 3rdlove.com with code podcast15 for $15 off and check out Pampers for the number one pediatrician-recommended diaper brand.

    • Focusing on real connections and nurturing themEmbrace joy in experiences, even when they may not align with reality, and value genuine connections and communication

      Even though our perceptions may not always align with reality, the impact on our emotions and happiness can be significant. Glennon Doyle shared a story about writing her book in a tiny closet, believing the plant she was caring for was real and growing, only to find out it was fake. Despite the disappointment, she found joy in her experience and the metaphor it presented – focusing on real connections and nurturing them, rather than wasting energy on dead or unreal things. Glennon's story also highlighted the importance of communication and sharing experiences with friends, as she learned from her friend Kate about the fake plant. Furthermore, her anecdote about using a hairdryer to preheat an oven as a child showcased her resourcefulness and creativity, even when faced with unfamiliar situations. Overall, Glennon's stories emphasized the importance of embracing the joy in our experiences, even when they may not align with reality, and the value of genuine connections and communication.

    • Setting Priorities: Self-Care and BoundariesRecognize the importance of self-care and setting boundaries to maintain personal well-being, even if it means saying no to others' requests.

      It's essential to prioritize self-care and set boundaries to avoid feeling overwhelmed by the guilt of not meeting others' expectations. The speaker, Shannon, shares her struggle with being a people pleaser and draining herself for others' happiness. Lori Santos, a doctor, advises acknowledging the importance of putting one's own oxygen mask on first before helping others. This metaphor signifies the need for personal well-being before assisting others. The conversation highlights the significance of self-compassion, re-evaluating boundaries, and understanding that it's okay to say no sometimes. It's crucial to recognize that we're human and cannot do it all, and our well-being should be a priority.

    • Recognizing and addressing feelings of overwhelm is crucial for avoiding burnoutOverlooked emotions like overwhelm can lead to negative consequences, prioritize self-care to avoid burnout. Provide pets with quality food, allow children to learn from mistakes, and prioritize own happiness during tough times.

      Recognizing and addressing feelings of overwhelm is crucial for avoiding burnout. Emotions like sadness, anger, and frustration are easier to understand, but overwhelm can be more difficult to articulate. It's a signal that you need to step back and prioritize self-care. Ignoring these signals can lead to negative consequences, such as addiction or burnout. Similarly, providing our pets with high-quality, fresh food is essential for their health and happiness, just as it is for us. In terms of raising children, allowing them to experience negative emotions and learn from their mistakes is essential for their psychological health and future resilience. By shielding them from these experiences, we may inadvertently hinder their ability to cope with the challenges of the real world. Finally, for those going through difficult times, it's important to trust your instincts and prioritize your own happiness and well-being. Remember, your feelings matter, and taking care of yourself is not selfish.

    • Practicing self-compassion during a breakupRecognize falling out of love is common, trust in resilience, prioritize self-care, and understand happiness isn't zero-sum.

      Acknowledging the pain and practicing self-compassion are crucial when dealing with the difficult experience of falling out of love. It's essential to recognize that this situation is common and that self-kindness can help alleviate some of the emotional turmoil. The decision to stay or leave a marriage is a personal one, but trusting in one's resilience and recognizing that it's hard either way can provide some comfort. Lastly, happiness is not a zero-sum game, and one person's happiness does not equate to another's unhappiness. It's essential to prioritize our own well-being while considering the impact on those around us.

    • Impact of Mothers' Emotions on Children's Well-beingPrioritizing personal happiness and mental well-being benefits both parents and children, creating a healthier family environment.

      Our emotions, especially those of mothers, can significantly impact our children's emotions and overall well-being. Sacrificing one's own happiness for the sake of their children's may seem like the right thing to do, but it can actually have the opposite effect. Instead, focusing on personal happiness and mental well-being can lead to a healthier and happier family environment. Additionally, in relationships, prioritizing personal happiness and growth can ultimately benefit both partners. It's important to remember that personal liberation does not come at the expense of others; rather, it can free both parties to pursue their own paths. Furthermore, taking inspiration from individuals who make a positive impact on the environment can serve as a reminder of the power we hold to make a difference in the world. Lastly, prioritizing joy and fun in our daily lives can lead to a more fulfilling and happier existence.

    • Seizing the day: cherishing joy and self-careMake time for joy and self-care to avoid regret and prioritize presence over productivity.

      Prioritizing joy and self-care is essential for long-term happiness and mental health, but it's often the first thing to go when we feel time-pressed. We all know that at the end of our lives, only a few things will truly matter, yet we don't always act accordingly. Our brains may be wired to focus on productivity and external pressures, but it's crucial to remember the concept of "seizing the day" in a deeper sense – being present and cherishing the people and experiences we care about. To avoid the regret of not having lived a fulfilling life, we should make sure to allocate time for joy and self-care alongside work and other responsibilities. This may require reevaluating our priorities and values, and perhaps even challenging societal norms that prioritize productivity over presence.

    • Reflecting on daily life and finding joy in the little thingsRealizing what truly matters in life requires reflection on daily experiences, setting boundaries, and appreciating the present moment.

      Focusing on the little things in life every day can bring greater happiness than constantly chasing after big accomplishments or future goals. In this exercise, individuals reflect on how they spent their day and realize that they may not be dedicating their time to things that truly matter to them. This revelation can lead to restructuring one's life by setting boundaries, saying no, and recognizing that not every goal may lead to lasting happiness. The speaker shares her personal experiences and encourages everyone to reflect on their own lives and consider what they would tell their younger selves. The concept of the "arrival fallacy" is discussed, which refers to the belief that happiness will come once a certain goal is reached, only to find that the next goal is always just beyond reach. Instead, it's essential to appreciate the present moment and find joy in the everyday experiences.

    • Recognizing the role of comparison in our pursuit of happinessUnderstanding our thoughts and emotions aren't always reality, and questioning fleeting desires can help us find true contentment.

      Our brains are wired to compare and constantly seek more, which can lead to a never-ending cycle of dissatisfaction and unhappiness. We often believe that achieving a certain goal or acquisition will bring us lasting happiness, but this isn't always the case. Instead, it's essential to recognize that our thoughts and emotions are not always reality and that we have the power to challenge them. We can learn to think at a meta level and question whether following a particular thought or desire will truly bring us happiness or if it's just a fleeting desire fueled by comparison. Ultimately, understanding this about ourselves can help us break free from the grip of capitalism and find true contentment.

    • Discovering a new favorite brand or podcast can bring joy during hard timesInvesting in comfortable and versatile clothing, like Vuori, and discovering supportive podcasts, like 'We Can Do Hard Things,' can significantly contribute to personal happiness during challenging times. Check out Vuori's current discount and free shipping offer for first-time buyers.

      Investing in comfortable and versatile clothing, like what Vuori offers, can significantly contribute to personal happiness. Listener Caitlin shared her experience of discovering the brand during a challenging time in her life and how it helped her feel less alone. The podcast, "We Can Do Hard Things," also serves as a source of support and encouragement for those going through major life changes. Additionally, Vuori is currently offering a discount and free shipping for first-time buyers on their website, making it an even more enticing investment. The podcast is produced in partnership with Cadence 13 Studios and can be found on various podcast platforms. Remember, small moments of joy, like discovering a new favorite brand or podcast, can make a big difference during hard times.

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