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    E766 Ask Nick - He’s Choosing His Family

    enJune 24, 2024

    Podcast Summary

    • Gender Equality and RespectMaintain accountability for mistreatment towards women, educate young men on respect, avoid gender generalizations, and instill healthy values in children.

      It's important to recognize and address issues of misbehavior towards women while also acknowledging the experiences and struggles of all genders. In the context of the discussion, this means continuing to hold accountable those who mistreat women, while also educating young men on how to treat women with respect and kindness. It's crucial to avoid generalizing and labeling entire genders based on the actions of some individuals. As a father, it's essential to instill healthy values and behaviors in children, regardless of their gender. Additionally, Altoids were emphasized as a reliable solution for maintaining fresh breath during dating situations, providing confidence and security. Huggies Skin Essentials were introduced as a new line of diapers, wipes, and training pants designed for sensitive baby skin.

    • Productive Dialogue on Gender RolesAcknowledge past societal biases, avoid dehumanizing entire groups, engage in open conversations, promote positive masculinity, and encourage healthy relationships for all genders to address current issues and prevent radicalization.

      It's essential to recognize and acknowledge the historical mistreatment of women and men's roles in society. However, it's equally important not to generalize and dehumanize entire groups based on past experiences or biases. We must strive for open conversations, empathy, and understanding to address current issues, such as the rising suicide rate among young men. By refusing to engage in productive dialogue, we risk pushing disenfranchised individuals towards radicalization. Instead, let's encourage conversations that promote positive masculinity and healthy relationships for all genders.

    • Recognizing struggles, promoting inclusivityEmpathy and open dialogue are vital for societal progress, preventing individuals from turning to harmful groups. Recognizing everyone's struggles and striving for understanding can lead to a more inclusive society. Additionally, emotional pain tolerance can be improved through learning and therapy.

      Empathy and open dialogue are crucial for societal progress. When people feel unheard, they may turn to harmful and radical groups. It's essential to recognize that everyone is dealing with their struggles and to strive for understanding and inclusivity. Additionally, the correlation between emotional and physical pain was discussed, suggesting that emotional pain tolerance can be improved through learning and therapy. Ultimately, focusing energy on personal growth and learning from experiences is more productive than dwelling on blame or generalizations.

    • Responding to pain and adversityWe can't control pain or adversity, but we can control how we respond to them, focusing on reactions and actions, and maintaining professionalism and communication in relationships.

      We cannot control many aspects of life, including pain and adversity. However, we can control how we respond to these situations. It's essential to focus on what we can control, such as our reactions and actions. Pain, whether physical or emotional, is inevitable, but our ability to endure and respond positively can significantly impact our quality of life. In the workplace, it's crucial to maintain professionalism and consider the potential consequences of confronting a coworker about an affair. It's essential to prioritize communication, respect, and understanding in relationships to prevent such situations from arising. Ultimately, we must learn to navigate difficult situations with grace and resilience.

    • Friendship and ConfidentialityAs a friend, respect the autonomy and privacy of the person confiding in you, and offer guidance and support without disrupting their relationships

      When a friend confides in you about their personal life and relationship issues, it's important to consider the context and your intentions before sharing information that could potentially disrupt their relationships. In this case, a friend shared her infidelity with her boyfriend, and the speaker was conflicted about whether to tell her or not. The speaker acknowledged that the friend's behavior was problematic, but also recognized that she had confided in the speaker and opened the door for advice. Ultimately, the speaker decided that it was not their place to intervene and instead chose to distance themselves from the situation. The key takeaway is that as a friend, it's important to offer guidance and support, but also to respect the autonomy and privacy of the person confiding in you.

    • Friend's self-destructive choicesApproach a friend making self-destructive choices with care, empathy, and honesty, offering guidance and accountability to potentially help them make better choices for their future relationships.

      When encountering a friend who may be making self-destructive choices, it's essential to decide if you want to be a supportive and honest friend or step back. If you choose to intervene, approach the situation with care and empathy, offering guidance and a listening ear while holding your friend accountable for their actions. This approach can potentially serve as a wake-up call and help your friend make better choices for their future relationships. Remember, it's crucial to assess your intentions and consider the potential impact on both parties before engaging.

    • Partner's quietness in social situationsConsider discussing potential misunderstandings with partner about conversational styles, as quietness in social situations may lead to discomfort or misinterpretations in loud, chatty families.

      The speaker is in a relationship with an introverted partner who is quiet around her family and friends, and she is concerned about the potential disconnect between their interpretations of conversations. She has not brought up the issue to him because she wanted him to address it on his own, but she is now considering doing so. The speaker comes from a loud and chatty Italian family and fears that her boyfriend's quietness may lead to misunderstandings or discomfort in social situations. She also mentions that her father is quiet in social settings, which is a fear for her in relationships. The speaker seems to be considering whether her boyfriend's quietness is something that can be worked on or if it is a fundamental aspect of his personality. She is unsure if he values her feedback or not.

    • Understanding Partner's Communication StyleAppreciate differences in communication styles and work on improving communication by recognizing strengths, finding common ground, and being patient and understanding.

      People have unique personalities and communication styles. Some individuals, like a boyfriend or a father, may be more introverted and less inclined towards small talk. It's essential to understand and appreciate these differences instead of criticizing them. If you're in a relationship with someone who's quieter, it's important to recognize their strengths and work on improving communication. However, it's also crucial to find common ground and shared interests to facilitate conversations. Ultimately, it's about being patient, understanding, and accepting your partner's personality, while also addressing any communication issues that may arise. Additionally, it's essential to recognize that people exhibit different behaviors in various settings, and their communication style at home might not be the same as in social situations.

    • Communication in RelationshipsMisunderstandings and assumptions in relationships can lead to unnecessary tension. Clear communication and conversation can help rebuild trust and strengthen the bond.

      Communication is key in any relationship. In the discussed situation, a misunderstanding between two individuals led to confusion and feelings of manipulation. The boyfriend unexpectedly showed up at the girlfriend's school, which she found invasive and manipulative. However, upon further discussion, it was revealed that his intentions were to clear up any misunderstandings and ensure they were both on the same page. Despite the initial discomfort, the girlfriend ultimately attended the dinner with her boyfriend. It's important to remember that relationships require open and honest communication, and assumptions or misunderstandings can lead to unnecessary tension. If there's a disconnect, having a conversation to clarify expectations and intentions can help rebuild trust and strengthen the bond between partners.

    • Romantic relationship communicationEffective communication is essential for a successful romantic relationship during med school, involving understanding each other's needs, having open conversations about expectations and feelings, and prioritizing the bond with compromise and empathy.

      Effective communication is crucial in any relationship, especially during challenging times. In the context of a romantic relationship during med school, both partners must understand each other's needs, personalities, and limitations. It's essential to have open conversations about expectations, schedules, and feelings to avoid misunderstandings and frustration. Remember, relationships require effort and compromise from both parties. If one partner feels overwhelmed or unable to meet the other's needs, it's essential to acknowledge the situation and work towards finding a solution together. Ultimately, the success of the relationship depends on the willingness of both partners to communicate openly, empathize with each other, and prioritize their bond.

    • Relationship expectationsAccepting differences and focusing on efforts and compromises are crucial for successful relationships. Adjusting expectations and having open conversations about boundaries and growth are essential.

      Relationships require effort and understanding from both parties. Communication and compromise are key to making things work. It's important to recognize and accept each other's personality traits, even if they're different from our own. In this specific situation, the speaker is dealing with a quiet and introverted boyfriend, which can make social situations challenging. However, instead of expecting him to change who he is, she suggests focusing on the things he's willing to work on and accepting the parts of him that are non-negotiable. Additionally, the speaker acknowledges that she might not have the time or energy for a relationship right now due to her busy schedule and the demands of med school. Ultimately, every relationship requires effort, and it's essential to have open and honest conversations about expectations, boundaries, and growth.

    • Sleep and Skin Health SolutionsHelix Sleep offers customizable mattresses with a long trial period and warranty, while Apostrophe provides personalized acne treatments through an online platform with dermatology expert consultation and prescription medications.

      Both Helix Sleep and Apostrophe offer innovative solutions to improve two essential aspects of life: sleep and skin health. Helix Sleep provides comfortable mattresses with customizable options, including a 100-night trial and a 10-15 year warranty. Their mattresses have received high praise from various publications and healthcare professionals. Apostrophe, on the other hand, offers personalized acne treatments through an online platform, allowing users to consult with dermatology experts and access prescription medications. With a simple online consultation and selfie submission, individuals can receive a customized treatment plan. Both companies aim to enhance the quality of life in their respective areas, making it worth considering for those in need of better sleep or acne solutions. Use the promo codes V-I-A-L-L for Helix Sleep and apostrophe.com/V-I-A-L-L for Apostrophe to enjoy exclusive discounts. In the relationship advice segment, a listener named Kylie shared her concern about her boyfriend's reluctance to move due to family ties. After initially breaking up, she later tried to find compromises, but the situation remains unresolved. The situation highlights the importance of open communication and understanding in relationships. It's crucial to discuss expectations, needs, and concerns with your partner and work together to find mutually beneficial solutions.

    • Family Influence on RelationshipsFamily influences can create significant tension in relationships when partners have differing priorities and goals. It's essential to communicate openly and seek therapy if necessary, but ultimately, the decision to continue the relationship rests on whether both partners are willing to compromise and grow independently.

      The speaker is in a relationship where her partner prioritizes his family over her, and she feels like she's the only one making compromises. They have strong differences on where they want to live, and the partner's family has influenced him greatly. The speaker has expressed her concerns about boundaries and his lack of independence, which has led to tension in their relationship. Despite being in couples therapy, it's unclear if this is a lost cause as they have different long-term goals. The partner's family has been a significant obstacle, and it remains to be seen if he can grow beyond his deep attachment to them. The speaker is unsure if she should continue to fight for the relationship or let go for someone who doesn't seem to prioritize her as much as she desires.

    • Long-distance relationship challengesLong-distance relationships require consistent communication and trust to overcome family influences and decision-making struggles, otherwise, tension and frustration may hinder progress in therapy.

      The speaker in this conversation is dealing with the complexity of a long-distance relationship, where her partner made a significant move for their relationship but still seems to be heavily influenced by his family and struggles with making decisions independently. She feels that he is not fully committed and that their situations, including where they live, are causing tension and frustration in their relationship. The couple is in therapy to work through these issues, but it's clear that there are communication and trust challenges that need to be addressed for them to move forward. The speaker's concern is that her partner may not be ready to fully commit to their relationship and that their differences, such as where they want to live, are causing a significant obstacle.

    • Prioritization in RelationshipsEffective communication and understanding priorities are essential in relationships. Partners need to make decisions together and prioritize each other to ensure a healthy and compatible partnership.

      Effective communication and understanding priorities in a relationship are crucial. The speaker in the conversation expressed her concerns about her boyfriend's commitment to their relationship and his constant prioritization of his family over her. She felt that his lack of communication about his decisions and his unwillingness to move away from his family were signs of immaturity and a lack of independence. The speaker and her therapist discussed the importance of focusing on his relationship with his family in couples therapy rather than just trying to make him move. They also emphasized the need for both partners to make decisions together and for each partner to prioritize the other in the relationship. Ultimately, the speaker acknowledged that changing her boyfriend's behavior might not be realistic and that she needed to consider the compatibility of their priorities in the relationship.

    • Communication and compatibilityEffective communication and understanding are crucial in maintaining a successful relationship. Expressing feelings and needs to your partner and finding a solution that works for both is essential. If differences are too significant, it may be necessary to move on and find someone who aligns more closely with your values and priorities.

      Communication and compatibility are key factors in a successful relationship. In the discussion, a woman expresses her concerns about her boyfriend's closeness with his family and her desire for more independence. She feels like she's constantly coming in between his family and being second priority. The couple is considering moving in together, but the woman is unsure if they're compatible due to these issues. The speaker suggests that the woman express her feelings to her boyfriend in couples therapy and let him make the decision about their relationship. She emphasizes the importance of being a priority in a partner's life and not feeling like a second choice. The speaker also acknowledges that everyone has different family dynamics and priorities, and it's essential to find someone who aligns with your needs. The conversation highlights the importance of open communication and understanding in a relationship. It's crucial to express your feelings and needs to your partner and work together to find a solution that works for both of you. If the differences are too significant, it may be time to move on and find someone who aligns more closely with your values and priorities.

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    Timestamps:
    00:00 - Intro
    02:55 - Father’s Day
    08:11 - Housekeeping
    11:40 - RHOA
    19:38 - Football
    22:03 - Bachelor Credit
    23:04 - Red Lobster
    30:33 - The Apprentice
    43:28 - Jenn’s Men
    01:08:55 - Picking Noses
    01:14:59 - Summerhouse
    01:33:39 - Perfect Match
    01:40:19 - Elys Joins
    02:02:19 - More Perfect Match
    02:06:20 - RHONJ
    02:11:46 - Outro

    The Viall Files
    enJune 18, 2024

    E763 Ask Nick - Flirting With an NHL Player

    E763 Ask Nick - Flirting With an NHL Player

    Welcome back to another episode of The Viall Files: Ask Nick Edition! We start off the episode by addressing your gentle parenting responses and diving into the ideal dating expectations of men. Then we get to our callers… 

    Our first caller wants to shoot her shot with a professional athlete. Our second caller is back with her ex, and is afraid to tell her parents. Finally, our third caller is thriving in her occupational industry but is afraid it turns off the men she’s dating.

    “As a woman who’s very successful and passionate about her career, that should never feel like a negative for you”

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    Please make sure to subscribe so you don’t miss an episode and as always send in your relationship questions to asknick@theviallfiles.com to be a part of our Monday episodes. 

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    The Viall Files
    enJune 17, 2024

    E762 GD w/ West Wilson - Summer House, Girlcode, Sleep Training, and Perfect Match with Tolú

    E762 GD w/ West Wilson - Summer House, Girlcode, Sleep Training, and Perfect Match with Tolú

    Welcome back to The Viall Files: Going Deeper, with Summer House’ West Wilson. 

    To start things out, we invite Tolú Ekundare from Netflix’s Perfect Match… She shares her experience matching with Izzy Zapata, Dom Gabriel, and Chris Hahn. Then we get to our interview with West. How was his first season? Who does he still talk to? Does he regret his relationship with Ciara?

    “When someone shows you who they are, believe it.” 

     Start your 7 Day Free Trial of Viall Files + here: https://viallfiles.supportingcast.fm/ 

     Please make sure to subscribe so you don’t miss an episode and as always send in your relationship questions to asknick@theviallfiles.com to be a part of our Monday episodes.

    Listen To Disrespectfully now!

    Listen on Apple: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/disrespectfully/id1516710301

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    Timestamps:
    00:00 - Intro
    05:48 - Household Headlines
    12:23 - Love Island
    17:57 - Summerhouse Drama
    21:05 - Captain Lee
    25:39 - Sleep Training
    31:08 - Age
    34:28 - Tolú Interview
    57:10 - Feedback
    01:10:22 - West Interview
    01:17:01 - New To Bravo
    01:19:55 - Saying Weird Things
    01:21:35 - Bachelor
    01:22:37 - Selfie
    01:30:54 - Your Heart
    01:43:15 - Love Languages
    01:50:26 - Dads
    01:54:12 - Team Carl
    01:59:55 - Her Take
    02:04:27 - Open
    02:14:39 - TOH
    02:30:00 - What Is Next
    02:32:52 - Ciara
    02:48:04 - Sports
    02:48:45 - Off Your Chest
    02:49:28 - Coming on ViFi
    02:53:59 - Outro

     

    The Viall Files
    enJune 13, 2024

    E761 RR - Summer House Reunion, Perfect Match w/ Kaz, Sandoval Drama, and Traitors Cast

    E761 RR - Summer House Reunion, Perfect Match w/ Kaz, Sandoval Drama, and Traitors Cast

    Welcome back to reality recap. Today we discuss all of the drama… ranging from Billie Lee slamming Sandoval’s new girlfriend, West Wilson getting grilled during the Summer House Reunion Part 1, Traitors cast announcement, and Jesse Lally having an affair with Anna Nicole Smith. Meanwhile, Kaz Bishop, from The Perfect Match zooms in! What’s it like back on TV, who does he want to match with, and does he regret anything? 

    “All I'm hearing is you’re a bottom feeder” 

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    Please make sure to subscribe so you don’t miss an episode and as always send in your relationship questions to asknick@theviallfiles.com to be a part of our Monday episodes.

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    Timestamps:
    00:00 - Intro
    3:54 - Bottom Feeders and Traitors
    18:56 - Traitors New Cast
    23:09 - Alec Baldwin
    24:09 - Kids
    30:12 - Kaz Interview
    01:01:34 - Perfect Match Thoughts
    01:04:54 - Summerhouse
    01:37:02 - The Valley
    01:38:34 - Stalkers
    01:45:25 - Outro

    The Viall Files
    enJune 11, 2024

    E760 Ask Nick - Carrying My BFF’s Baby

    E760 Ask Nick - Carrying My BFF’s Baby

    Welcome back to another episode of The Viall Files: Ask Nick Edition! Before we get to our callers, we talk about menu anxiety and gentle parenting. Then we get to our callers…

    Our first caller is carrying her best friend's baby, but her mother and law doesn’t approve. Our Second caller is a single mom and it’s been 9 years since she’s last called someone her boyfriend. Finally, our third caller feels like the city she lives in makes it impossible to move on from her ex.

    “When you look back at your relationship, was he really the perfect boyfriend?”

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    Please make sure to subscribe so you don’t miss an episode and as always send in your relationship questions to asknick@theviallfiles.com to be a part of our Monday episodes. 

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    The Viall Files
    enJune 10, 2024