EP 44 The Meg - Shark Pigging

We investigate how a combined Meg-Jason Statham fusion would work as a pet and almost manage to make a coherent episode:

• Can you milk a cow shark?
• How exactly, do you grind cheese?
• Can you use Jason Stratham as a grinder?

And yes, we pronounce Jason Statham's name with an R because I once heard someone say it like that on the radio once and it got glued in my brain. It's science. Statham science. 

Also - OverLondon our comic-fantasy-whodunnit is available at our website, OverLondon.net!

We delve into the awful cult movie The VelociPastor and answer all of the questions:

• What use is a were-dinosaur at a children's party?
• How cheap was the crappy dinosaur costume?
• Is China in Pennsylvania or Pittsburgh?
• What does a montage taste like?

We're back! Season 2 baybee!

We kick off with the highly contested, Oscar the Grouch... yes, we'll do a proper monster next time I promise.

Anyway - we ask the real questions:

• Is his can nuclear powered?
• Is he a rent-controlled defense against gentrification?
• Is his girlfriend comfortable with his pachyderm polyamory?
• Can we evict him and clean up the Pacific Ocean?
• Do puppets breathe, or only when you're not watching?
• Would you buy animal-people-leather??

And remember: What happens in the can, stays in the can.

As we are just finishing off the edit on a book, we thought we'd have a (hopefully informative) rant about editors and the editorial process. Because gnarr.

• Signs your editor may stink and how to find a shiny unicorn.
• What are the breeds of editor?
• How much do they cost?
• Various stories from the trenches...

Also on another note... we gonna be traveling and kicking off some house sitting again in SE asia (looking after some real monsters), so till we get back in the swing we may be a little intermittent :D

So I had a think about it, and it turns out the Crystal Gem species is rather overpowered. Like... Immortal xenomorph meets nano-tech hegemonic-swarm combined with planet sculpting and  a side salad of resurrection plus faster than light travel. So I might have gotten a tiny bit ambitious with this episode...

• I work out what the true purpose of the Gem civilization is!
• We decide the mecha-diamond needs a crown and underpants (George gets to be those)
• Non-binary post scarcity utopia for everyone!
• Grey Goo got nothing on The Pinkness.
• Also... Peridot best gem.

We investigate "The Affront", one of the most charismatic and truly awful alien species to ever exist. A tentacled gas-sac parody of British aristocracy from the book Excession by Iain M Banks, one of the greatest science fiction writers that ever lived.

• I wax poetic about the post scarcity society known as "The Culture"
• Overlords... Blaaargh!
• George riffs on Legend of the Overfiend because she can get away with it.
• Apparently, I am the Affront. But not for the reason you think.
• Aristocracy's toilet habits
• And remember, Don't F$% with the Culture.

Also:
The Affronter art picture we found
Iain M Banks official web page
Excession

In this episode we ramble about our current favorite anime... Jashin-chan Doroppukikku (Dropkick on my Devil) as well as think about pork cutlets and reminisce about eating roast duck ramen in Tokyo.

Anyway who doesn't love a regenerating topless Lamia maid who is constantly trying to kill you (mostly via snakey dropkick)?

• Why are there not enough slice of life parody anime out there??
• Why IS pork cutlet and croquettes so amazing?
• Why is podcast?

Oh and here are some links to some of the the oddball anime we mentioned:

• Dropkick On My Devil
• Excel Saga
• Kono Healer
• Great Director Nabeshin (Shinichi Watanabe)

George made me watch the original Predator and we consider it as a pet. For example:

• Does it keep walking into stuff at ambient temperature?
• Where to I get magic invisi-mud?
• We probe the dark truth as to where glowsticks REALLY come from...
• And realize predators are really landing in orbital drop toilets

We rant and rave about the androids and magical black goo in Alien Covenant (and Prometheus).
Quite a bit, actually...

• Neutrino shockwave? ...no... just no.
• Join the egg sniffers guild today, we have cookies!
• Why android hair???
• volcanic glass >> magic faux genetic god alien
• Chekhov's gun misfires again
• And more!

We dive into the Discworld and consider Gaspode, the cynical ball of stench and disease or as he would put it "Mans best friend, et cetera, et cetera. Give the little doggie a biscuit. Homo-Sapiens! You can keep 'em."

• We talk about Greyfriars Bobby, the inspiration behind Gaspode.
• We remember the good/bad old days of London, that Pratchett parodies with Ankh Morpork, where indoor toilets were mistrusted and putting your cape down on the sidewalk for a lady meant you'd need to burn it afterwards.
• George digs into London's "great stink" of the 1850's - where so many corpses were piled up, the smell literally killed people.
• Would Gaspode make the idea literary agent?