Podcast Summary
Living fully in the present moment despite impermanence: Embrace the fragility of life, live each moment with clarity, courage, and compassion, and cherish every experience as we never know when our conditions might change.
The importance of embracing the impermanence of life and living fully in the present moment. The guest, Koshin Paley Ellison, shares his experiences of growing up with death and the impact it had on his understanding of the fragility of life. He emphasizes the need to live each moment with clarity, courage, and compassion, as we never know when our conditions might change. This idea is beautifully encapsulated in the opening line of his new book, "All the time I work with dying people and only a few of them know they are dying." This profound realization calls for us to cherish every moment and live our lives to the fullest, just as Forrest did when he attended a meditation retreat as a teenager and was deeply moved by the experience.
Embracing Mortality for a Fulfilling Life: Recognizing our mortality can bring a new appreciation for life, making ordinary moments more precious and encouraging us to express love and appreciation to others.
Appreciating the reality of our mortality can help us live more fully and love more deeply. For most of human history, caring for the dying was an intimate part of daily life. However, in modern times, we have distanced ourselves from this reality, often only acknowledging death when it is imminent. Yet, recognizing that we are all dying, even if not terminally ill, can bring a new appreciation for life. As the author shared, a woman named Rose Tisnato, who had hidden her eccentric self for much of her life, urged people to "not hold back" and celebrate life. Knowing that our time is limited can make ordinary moments more precious and encourage us to express our love and appreciation to those around us. As the Zen master Suzuki Roshi said, "living is like taking a voyage in a boat that you know will sink." Embracing this truth can bring a sense of urgency and beauty to our lives.
Exploring Fear with Curiosity and Groundedness: Through mindfulness practices like meditation, we can learn to untangle from habitual reactions to fear, identify with a more spacious perspective, and meet fear with curiosity and freshness.
Fear and difficult emotions are a natural part of being alive, but we have the unique ability as humans to reflect and contemplate, allowing us to approach fear with curiosity and groundedness. Fear can be seen as a living being's response to discomfort, but we have the power to untangle ourselves from the habitual reactions and identify with a more spacious, loving, and free perspective. This process of untangling is not only personally beneficial but also essential in today's society where many people are getting entangled in reactive cycles of opposition to others' views. The ancient Buddhist teachings, which emphasize disentanglement, provide a strong foundation for this practice. Through mindfulness practices like meditation, we can learn to ground ourselves, soften our minds, and open ourselves to the present moment, allowing us to meet fear and anxiety with curiosity and freshness.
The power to untangle our own corners of the world: We each have the power to navigate life's tangles with a healthy sense of humor and responsibility, using our brain's ability to contract and expand focus.
Life can be seen as a tangled mess, but instead of being stuck in our victimhood or personal struggles, we have the power to untangle our own corners of the world. This can be seen in the story of the Zen cook who, despite accidentally serving a snake head in the soup, took responsibility for his actions and moved on. This concept of balance between contraction and expansion, or narrow focus and expansive awareness, can help us navigate the tangles of life with a healthy sense of humor and responsibility. As Judson Brewer, a contemplative science researcher, emphasizes, the brain, our most complex organ, is capable of both contraction and expansion, and it's up to us to use this understanding to untangle our own minds. Ultimately, the world may be tangled, but we each have the power to untangle our own corners of it.
Finding stability and spaciousness within ourselves: Even in tough situations, focusing on the present moment and practicing acceptance can lead to stability and joy.
Even in the midst of difficult experiences or feelings, we can find stability and spaciousness within ourselves. This was emphasized through the story of Manny, who approached dealing with a large amount of trash on the street with a simple and grounded attitude. This concept is similar to practices found in the Buddhist tradition, such as acceptance, and can be applied to everyday life. The Doctor John DeLaney Show, with its practical and direct format, can provide valuable advice and guidance for navigating tough situations related to common challenges. By focusing on the present moment and starting with what's right in front of us, we can begin to untangle and find joy in the everyday.
The Power of Acceptance in Healing: Accepting difficult emotions and situations can bring healing and comfort. The ZOE Science and Nutrition podcast offers science-based insights for health and nutrition. OneSkin's OS01 face topical peptide can improve skin health. Focus on acceptance and self-care for overall well-being.
Accepting difficult situations and allowing ourselves to fully feel our emotions, rather than trying to change them, can bring healing and comfort. This was exemplified in a story shared about a mother who lost her child to suicide. Instead of trying to offer solutions or reassurances, the listener sat with her in her grief, providing a space for her to express her emotions freely. This simple act of acceptance and presence was deeply impactful for the mother, demonstrating the power of acceptance practices. For those seeking reliable information about health and nutrition, the ZOE Science and Nutrition podcast is a valuable resource, providing science-based insights to help make informed choices. Additionally, for those looking to improve their skin health, OneSkin offers a simple and effective solution with their OS01 face topical peptide. By focusing on acceptance and self-care, both mentally and physically, we can improve our overall well-being.
Being still with someone's pain and asking 'how can I help?': Instead of rushing in to solve someone's problem, ask 'how can I help?' and learn from their experience to cultivate compassion
Sometimes trying to help or be compassionate too quickly can keep someone tangled up in their struggles. Instead, holding space and being curious with genuine questions of "how can I help?" can be more beneficial. This idea was inspired by the teaching of not rushing in to untangle, which can be seen in the Ram Dass and Paul Gorman book. When we're feeling depleted or tangled up, finding a community or teacher can help us learn to be still with our pain and develop compassion for others. The speaker's personal experience of attending a smelly and seemingly unsafe karate school as a child was a turning point for them, as they learned to sit with their pain and discovered the power of being still in a community. This practice of being still with pain and learning from others continues to nourish and inform the speaker to this day.
Meditation and Jungian training: A transformative duo: Meditation roots you in the present while Jungian work uncovers conditioning. Both practices complement each other for ongoing growth and self-discovery.
The combination of meditation practice and Jungian training has provided a unique and enriching experience for the speaker. Meditation serves as a somatic practice that deeply roots one in the present moment, while Jungian work helps in understanding and addressing conditioning that hinders true pleasure and connection with the world. Both practices are designed for different purposes but complement each other, allowing for continued growth and exploration. The speaker emphasizes the importance of staying engaged in the process and having supportive partners and community. Through this integration, the speaker has gained a deeper appreciation for the transcendent function and the importance of staying open to the ongoing journey of self-discovery. While there are ongoing challenges and untangling to be done, the speaker values the developmental change and recognition of underlying wholeness that comes with this dual practice.
Arrogance and self-centeredness hinder spiritual growth: Recognize and shift from arrogance to mindfulness, cherish the present moment, and embrace life's beauty and connection with others.
Arrogance and self-centeredness can hinder our spiritual growth and connection with others. Koshy shares his personal experience of realizing this during a Zen retreat, where he was reminded of his arrogant behavior and the importance of appreciating the good around him and belonging to a community. This realization led him to shift his focus and cultivate mindfulness towards every inch of his life, recognizing the inner goodness and capabilities within himself and others. The journey towards undoing the cage of self-centeredness and fully embracing life's beauty and wonder is an ongoing practice. It's essential to acknowledge our doubts and touch with our own inner wellspring of love and capabilities, which can be facilitated by recognizing these qualities in others. Every day is a gift, and embracing the present moment. Koshy's reflections serve as a reminder to cherish the journey of self-discovery and connection with others.
Appreciating the present moment, even in the face of pain and fear: Embrace the present moment, find compassion and courage in the face of death and dying, and appreciate the lovable aspects in ourselves and others.
Life, with all its mysteries and challenges, is a precious gift that we should appreciate fully. Koshin Paley Ellison, a Zen teacher and author, emphasized the importance of living in the present moment, even in the face of pain and fear, drawing on stories from his experiences in contemplative care. He shared the story of Shinryu Suzuki, a dying Zen master, and how his student's perspective of his suffering changed the way she approached life. Ellison encouraged us to free ourselves from the idea of living and instead embrace the present moment, finding the lovable aspects in ourselves and others. He emphasized that we are all living in bodies that are dying, and facing the reality of this fact can help us live more fully. Through his stories and teachings, Ellison offered insights on how to appreciate the present moment and find compassion and courage in the face of death and dying.
The power of acceptance in practice: Acceptance of someone in their suffering can provide a space for healing without the need for change or resistance. Koshin's book 'Untangled' offers insights into the practice of acceptance and mindfulness.
The importance and power of acceptance in practice. Koshin Paley Ellison shared a profound story about a grieving parent, illustrating how being fully present and accepting someone in their suffering can provide a space for healing without the need for change or resistance. This moment of acceptance, as demonstrated by Koshin, is a practical and transformative act that can help us navigate difficult experiences and connect deeply with others. For those seeking to explore acceptance further, Koshin's book "Untangled: Walking the Eightfold Path to Clarity, Courage, and Compassion" is an excellent resource, offering accessible insights into the practice of acceptance and mindfulness. If you have enjoyed this podcast and would like to support our work, please consider subscribing, leaving a review, or visiting our Patreon page for bonus content.
