Poogstellar (RE-RELEASE)

All dogs are puppies and all cats are kittens. You have to sit with dignity to meditate. The question of the retinol bump and when to judge the day. Who cares if years lie fallow? Kate calls a club a spade, and Jacqueline offers the idiot take of an outsider. Could they put on a magic show to save their lives? Maybe it’s time for Movie POOG… That’s Greg, for ya! 

Brands mentioned: Dieux Skin, Lyma, Celsius, The Ludlow Hotel, Pat McGrath, Armani

Edited and mixed by Allie Graham.

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One week you’re gorgeous…the next week? You’re hideous. Waking up to pee and Shark Tank raw to the dome. ADD 2.0 was heard in full on the road. Blinds shut, curtains closed, not even looking at the view. Jacqueline believed the hours — of course she did! Kate had a day of huge euphoria and has never been more dehydrated. $83 dresses and the detail of 6:30 at night are discussed. Theatre doesn’t pay, and Jacqueline shows off a bruise from escaping an escalator. The beautiful sign of death and dumping it all out onto the floor. A strange moment when Kate drives by Jacqueline’s house…but doesn’t go in. What have we lost to goofy graphics? Top to bottom, Kate had taken the note.

Discussed: Saie Beauty, Burrow, Hatch, PAIGE Denim and Free People Movement.

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The body just wants yesterday, again. A stranger's office. Kate became the awareness. Jacqueline remembers the crystal shops. To ask, will that ever be me again? Holding the jade egg. Sensing what aisle to turn down. Imagine knowing dawn & yearning for a pendant. You know what it's not? A fucking migraine. The new guy is not the son. Are we fighting wildly, violently, and against our own best interest?

Edited and mixed by Allie Graham.

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Hypersomnia, sleep studies. Vitamin Water. Felicity. Giving birth on your back and dying on your back. Squatty Potty, snail venom.

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The hags discuss flossing, taxes, and the confusion of natural deodorant.

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Look, folks. Kate’s in the midst of the final week of her sold out KATE run at the Pasadena Playhouse. Jacqueline’s doing rabid press for the Get on Your Knees premiere. So a remix is on offer. The theme is the road to GOYK, featuring Poog clips from the show’s touring days, the countdown to the taping aka the “wedding” and Jacqueline and Kate's reflections from the stage. Get pumped and then go watch Get on Your Knees on @netflixisajoke. Can Hag nation send the special to number 1?

Edited by Allie Graham.

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Is the first thought best? Escrow and group munchausen by proxy. It’s radical, punk and brave to go anywhere alone. Somatic anger at the baby. Maps of restaurants and performing noticing. Kate is not Mariah Carey. Jacqueline is not interested in learning what a pilot light is. The apple doesn’t fall far, does it? Never be afraid to approach. 

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I could go all night with you two. Six Feet Under. To see a twin without their twin… the vanity suddenly looked beautiful. Good girl syndrome and defending The Ritz like she built it. Don’t blow my brother! National Chair Day? Priceless.

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A case of diagonal interlopers. Ma’am, when you’re done on your phone, I’d like to get my coffee. Do not underestimate the stress of anything. AstraZeneca? Again, Kate was happy to pay… and a little tipsy off two margs. Jacqueline got a separate check and the pork belly skewers were not a main. First in line? We cannot accommodate you. Her bullshit is a dream.

Edited and mixed by Allie Graham.

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Moments from The Road to Christmas' stops in Philly and Vancouver: Is there a woman in the room? Woah, woah, WOAH! The Blair Witch Project and other found footage. First guest and first sneeze. Pilots are poets. One has to suffer. Put on lipstick during turbulence. Kate insists it was turndown. The choreography of survival.

Edited and mixed by Allie Graham.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.