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    Susie Flory - Bullying, Eating Disorders, and the Lasting Pain of One Cruel Comment

    en-usOctober 28, 2020
    What inspired Susie to start her catering business?
    How did bullying impact Susie's journey with anxiety?
    What role does support play in overcoming disordered eating?
    How does Susie find joy in cooking and community?
    Why is self-compassion important in personal growth?

    • From Anxiety to Fulfillment: Susie's Journey with FoodThrough resilience and self-discovery, Susie overcame anxiety and found joy in food, connecting with others and building a successful catering business.

      Everyone's story is unique, and our experiences shape who we become. Susie, a 23-year-old London resident, shared her inspiring journey of overcoming anxiety and finding joy in food through her catering business, Susie's Larder. Her love for London and its diverse communities influenced her, but her past experiences, including bullying and a focus on external validation, also played a significant role. Susie's story highlights the importance of resilience, self-discovery, and the power of sharing experiences and connecting with others through food. Despite her past struggles, she transformed her relationship with food and found fulfillment in cooking and bringing people together. Her story serves as a reminder that no matter what challenges we face, we can find strength and happiness within ourselves.

    • Body image during adolescenceNegative experiences and lack of education around body changes during adolescence can lead to harmful behaviors like disordered eating. Support and education are crucial for promoting healthy body image.

      The lack of education and understanding around normal body changes during adolescence, coupled with negative experiences and comments, can lead to harmful behaviors like disordered eating. The speaker shares her experience of being made to feel insecure in her body at a young age, which led to a loss of control and an obsession with food. She also mentions the stress of being made head girl in her last year of school, which further exacerbated her disordered eating. The lack of support and education around the topic made her feel isolated and in denial, leading to a cycle of denial and further harm. It's clear that more love, support, and education around body image and normal body changes during adolescence could have made a significant difference in the speaker's experience.

    • The Impact of Body Shaming on Young PeopleBody shaming and societal pressure can lead to harmful behaviors and even suicide among young people. Social media perpetuates unrealistic beauty standards and focusing on inner qualities is essential.

      Body shaming and societal pressure to conform to unrealistic beauty standards can have devastating effects on young people, leading to harmful behaviors like disordered eating, isolation, and even suicide. The speaker's personal experience as a high school student being body shamed and her subsequent struggle with disordered eating illustrates this. She also highlights the role of social media in perpetuating these harmful ideals and the importance of focusing on inner qualities rather than external appearances. The issue is pervasive, with many young people feeling the pressure to conform, and it contributes to the alarming rise in teen depression and suicide, particularly among females. It's crucial that we create a culture that values and supports individuals for who they are, rather than what they look like.

    • Personal struggle with anorexiaAnorexia can be hidden, even from the individual experiencing it. Seek help if you suspect it, and believe in your ability to overcome it.

      Anorexia is a complex mental health issue that can be difficult for individuals to recognize and acknowledge. The speaker shares her personal experience of struggling with anorexia, which was not evident in her early years. She describes the distorted perception of her body image and the denial she faced, even as her friends and family noticed her deteriorating health. The speaker also mentions how the addiction to starvation can morph one's perception of reality, making it challenging to recognize the severity of the situation. She eventually reached a breaking point, where she recognized her need for help and sought it from her mother. The speaker emphasizes the strength of individuals dealing with such challenges and encourages them to believe in their ability to overcome their struggles. Anorexia is a serious condition that requires professional help and support.

    • The power of personal agency in recoveryBelief in invincibility and determination to recover on one's own terms are crucial for overcoming adversity in recovery.

      During times of struggle and adversity, the most powerful force in recovery is the individual themselves. The speaker's experience with anorexia involved a complex relationship with her parents, who tried to help but ultimately allowed her to take control of her own healing process. The speaker emphasizes that acceptance of her diagnosis was crucial, and that her father's quiet support and hugs made a significant difference. Although the situation was dire, she maintained a belief in her invincibility and was determined to recover on her own terms. The speaker's story underscores the importance of personal agency and resilience in overcoming challenges.

    • Unexpected life changes can lead to motivation and growthRecognizing the potential in small events and surrounding oneself with positivity can lead to significant life improvements. Everyone's journey is unique, and self-compassion is crucial for personal growth and empathy towards others.

      A turning point in someone's life can come unexpectedly, even from a seemingly small event like missing a dinner party due to dietary restrictions. This realization of wanting a change can lead to a newfound motivation and determination to improve one's life, despite the challenges and setbacks. It's essential to recognize that everyone's journey is unique, and there's no one-size-fits-all solution. Surrounding oneself with positive influences and focusing on the good things in life can make a significant difference. As the speaker shared, it's important to remember that life is a blessing, and every day is an opportunity to grow and be the best version of oneself. Additionally, understanding the importance of self-compassion and acknowledging that everyone faces struggles can help us empathize with others and offer support when needed.

    • Respond to bullies with empathy and indifferenceEmpathy and support can make a significant difference in someone's life, helping them connect with others and overcome challenges

      Bullying, which stems from a misconceived sense of self-worth, can lead to detrimental experiences. Reflecting on past experiences, it's essential to respond to bullies with empathy and indifference rather than engaging in a negative cycle. Empathy, as a powerful tool, allows us to connect with others and understand their struggles. It's crucial to remember that everyone faces unique challenges, and offering support can bring us closer to those around us. Material possessions and career success cannot compare to the joy of human interaction and connection. If you encounter someone going through hardships, be that person they trust and offer reassurance, even if they initially resist help. Empathy, understanding, and support can make a significant difference in someone's life.

    • Support from friends during tough timesFriends offer comfort, understanding, and support during difficult times, helping individuals cope and feel less alone. Navigating twenties' challenges like relationships and job market stresses is normal and okay, with the most important thing being to keep moving forward and surround yourself with positive influences.

      During difficult times, the presence of a supportive friend can make all the difference. Offering kindness, understanding, and a listening ear can help someone feel less alone and more able to cope. It's important to remember that everyone goes through tough times, and showing up for someone with love and compassion is a powerful tool. Additionally, for those in their twenties, the stresses of finding a meaningful relationship and navigating the job market can be significant. But it's important to remember that these challenges are a normal part of life and that it's okay to be different and make mistakes along the way. Ultimately, the most important thing is to keep moving forward and to surround yourself with people who lift you up and support you through the ups and downs.

    • The complexity of modern relationshipsIncreased choices and societal pressure for perfection can make finding love more challenging, leading to chronic dissatisfaction and missed opportunities.

      The abundance of choices and societal pressure for perfection in modern relationships make finding love more challenging than it was in the past. The speaker shares her personal experience of indecisiveness and the constant comparison to endless options on dating apps, which can lead to a chronic dissatisfaction. She also references economic theory, explaining how the increased supply of potential partners can devalue each individual, leading people to keep searching instead of settling. The speaker advises taking chances and not regretting missed opportunities, as nobody is perfect and finding someone who makes you 95% happy is a good thing. Ultimately, the stress of having so many options and the desire for perfection can make the simple act of finding love more complicated than it needs to be.

    • Adopt a 'Rolls Royce strategy' for datingBe selective and consider potential partners thoroughly to increase value and appreciation in relationships.

      In today's overwhelming dating marketplace, it's essential to value yourself and be selective. The speaker suggests adopting a "Rolls Royce strategy," where you only engage with potential partners after thorough consideration, just as you would when shopping for valuable items. This approach not only respects your worth but also increases your value in the eyes of others. The speaker encourages women to be more selective and scarce, as this strategy can lead to greater appreciation and happiness. Additionally, maintaining a positive mental attitude and pursuing your passions, like Susie's catering business, marketing work, and podcast, can lead to personal growth and future success. Ultimately, by being selective and focusing on self-worth, you can break the supply-demand equation and find a truly valuable and fulfilling relationship.

    • Overcoming adversity through determination and resilienceThrough Susie's story, we learn that no matter how tough life gets, we have the power to come out of it by staying determined and resilient. Sharing stories and supporting each other can make a big difference.

      That no matter how tough the situations in life may be, we have the power to come out of them if we make the decision to do so. Susie's story is a testament to this, and her openness in sharing her experiences serves as an inspiration for everyone. It's not an easy journey, but with determination and resilience, we can overcome adversity. Susie's upcoming cookbook is a symbol of her triumph over tough times, and her warmth and generosity shine through in her willingness to help others. Mo's podcast has been a source of comfort and inspiration for many, and Susie encourages listeners to reach out to her if they ever need someone to talk to. The conversation also highlights the importance of self-care and taking time to slow down amidst the busyness of life. Overall, the conversation underscores the idea that we all have the capacity to turn our lives around if we choose to do so, and that sharing our stories and supporting each other can make a significant difference.

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    Sensation and emotion study in progress: http://eatingdisorders.ucsd.edu/research/our-research.html
    Sensation study: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3955712/
    Another sensation study: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC7230430/
    Bodily sensations study: https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/29483865/
    Sensation study looking particularly at disgust: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6759364/
    Broader study on interoceptive awareness (awareness of body cues): https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC7927286/
    Genetics and neurobiology: https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/21243469/

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    Peer-to-Peer Support in the PICU: A Conversation with Chaplain Amanda Payne Lindsay and Nurse Katelyn Terry

    Peer-to-Peer Support in the PICU: A Conversation with Chaplain Amanda Payne Lindsay and Nurse Katelyn Terry

    In this episode of Raising Joy, we discuss a new peer-to-peer support program that is underway in Cook Children's Pediatric Intensive Care Unit (PICU). Chaplain Amanda Payne Lindsay and Katelyn Terry, RN, join us to talk about the program's goals, how it works, and the impact it's having on PICU staff.

    The PICU can be a traumatic environment for health care workers, and this program is aimed at limiting the impact of stress, depression, anxiety, and burnout. The program trains appointed PICU employees to serve as supportive peers to lean on in times of need.

    Listen to learn how they started the peer-to-peer support program and why similar programs could benefit workplaces of all kinds.

    Music as Medicine: Healing at Sparklefly Studio with Raymond Turner

    Music as Medicine: Healing at Sparklefly Studio with Raymond Turner

    In this heartwarming episode of Raising Joy, we meet Raymond Turner, the studio producer of Sparklefly Recording Studio in the Child Life Zone at Cook Children's. Raymond's story is one of resilience, compassion, and the transformative power of music.

    Join us as Raymond shares his inspiring journey to Cook Children's, where he found his calling in creating music for some of the hospital's youngest patients. We'll delve into the deeply moving experience of crafting heartbeat songs memorializing terminal children for their families, a testament to Raymond's unwavering dedication to bringing joy and solace during the most challenging times.

    Raymond's story is a reminder that even in the face of adversity, there is always room for hope, healing, and the power of human connection. His work at Cook Children's is a beacon of light, touching the lives of countless families and leaving a mark on their hearts forever.

    Raymond also gave a TedX Talk in the spring of 2023. You can watch his talk here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MFLwwUj7gHg

    A NICU Parent's Guide to Managing Emotions

    A NICU Parent's Guide to Managing Emotions

    Having a child in the NICU can be a very stressful and emotional experience for parents. In this episode of Raising Joy, we talk to Landy Blackmore, whose daughter, Tillie, was born prematurely and spent time in Cook Children's NICU. Landy shares her personal story and offers practical advice on how to cope with the emotional rollercoaster that comes with having a child in the NICU.

    Whether you're feeling overwhelmed, scared, or simply exhausted, Landy's insights and support can help you navigate this difficult time.

    If you're a parent whose child is in the NICU, or if you know someone who is, be sure to listen to this episode of Raising Joy!

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