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    When Your Abusive Husband is a Pastor

    enSeptember 30, 2020

    About this Episode

    When Lynn, a widow and registered nurse, met her abuser for the first time, she thought he was a safe bet. Who could be safer than a pastor and former missionary? But once he had her hooked in, he tore down her dignity and identity through shaming and neglect. Lynn shares her long journey of waking up to the shaking reality that even religious leaders can be wolves in sheep's clothing. 

    • Find out what abusive spiritual leaders do when they counsel other abusers.
    • Learn about some of the more subtle kinds of domestic abuse. 
    • Discover the key all survivors need to have to unlock the door of their prison. 

    Access the transcript, read the show notes, and/or ask Natalie a question here

    If you are a Christian woman who thinks you may be in an emotionally destructive marriage, learn more at https://flyingfreenow.com

    I'll send you (free!) the first chapter of my book, Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage, which has an assessment to help you figure out if your relationship is abusive or not. All you have to do is hop on my mailing list.

    You can also find out about our online education and support program for women of faith at https://joinflyingfree.com

    Recent Episodes from Flying Free

    Excommunication Series: Valerie's Story

    Excommunication Series: Valerie's Story

    In part two of our excommunication series, I interview Valerie, a former member of a Reformed Baptist church that excommunicated her for divorcing her unfaithful and emotionally abusive husband.


    After years of receiving “help” from her church as she endured betrayal after betrayal from her husband, she said enough was enough. But even as she divorced her husband and then tried to leave the church peacefully, they wouldn’t allow it. They had to have the last word. Listen to Valerie’s story today. 

    Read the show notes and/or ask Natalie a question here


    If you are a Christian woman who thinks you may be in an emotionally destructive marriage, learn more at https://flyingfreenow.com

    I'll send you (free!) the first chapter of my book, Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage, which has an assessment to help you figure out if your relationship is abusive or not. All you have to do is hop on my mailing list

    You can also find out about our online education and support program for women of faith at https://joinflyingfree.com.

    And finally, if you are a divorced Christian woman who wants to take back her life and get healthy, lose weight, have amazing relationships, get things done, build a business or career, and even find a good man (if you want one) - check out Flying Higher.

    Excommunication Series: Marieda's Story

    Excommunication Series: Marieda's Story

    Your high-handed sin against God is a dangerous domain, especially for those that claim Christ and have identified with the church.” Mareida read these words in shock after her “sin” of running away from her abuser had reached the ears of her church. 


    Marieda has a story to tell, and you’ll want to listen in. It’s a story of freedom from emotional abuse and then being punished for it by the church that was supposed to protect her. It’s a story of deep betrayal but also rising from the ashes. 


    This is the first in a series of three episodes about excommunication. 


    Meet Marieda. Here is her excommunication story.


    Read the show notes and/or ask Natalie a question here


    If you are a Christian woman who thinks you may be in an emotionally destructive marriage, learn more at https://flyingfreenow.com

    I'll send you (free!) the first chapter of my book, Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage, which has an assessment to help you figure out if your relationship is abusive or not. All you have to do is hop on my mailing list

    You can also find out about our online education and support program for women of faith at https://joinflyingfree.com.

    And finally, if you are a divorced Christian woman who wants to take back her life and get healthy, lose weight, have amazing relationships, get things done, build a business or career, and even find a good man (if you want one) - check out Flying Higher.

    Is Teaching Boundaries Victim Blaming?

    Is Teaching Boundaries Victim Blaming?

    Is teaching survivors how to have boundaries the equivalent of victim blaming? I’ve seen this topic come up again and again, and I thought it was time I stated what I believe about it. The bottom line is that I believe that boundaries is an essential tool in a survivor’s toolbox. I also believe abuse is never, ever the survivor’s fault. Those two beliefs can go hand in hand nicely, and I’m going to show you how.


    Join me as I explain my stance, why it’s important, and what McDonald’s burgers and fries have to do with the whole sordid affair.

    Read the show notes and/or ask Natalie a question here


    If you are a Christian woman who thinks you may be in an emotionally destructive marriage, learn more at https://flyingfreenow.com

    I'll send you (free!) the first chapter of my book, Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage, which has an assessment to help you figure out if your relationship is abusive or not. All you have to do is hop on my mailing list

    You can also find out about our online education and support program for women of faith at https://joinflyingfree.com.

    And finally, if you are a divorced Christian woman who wants to take back her life and get healthy, lose weight, have amazing relationships, get things done, build a business or career, and even find a good man (if you want one) - check out Flying Higher.


    Now Available: All the Scary Little Gods

    Now Available: All the Scary Little Gods

    I gratefully and joyfully, with so much love, offer my brand new book, All the Scary Little Gods, to you!


    WHO THIS BOOK IS FOR:

    • Anyone who has suffered from anxiety in their relationship with God
    • Perfectionists
    • Fear filled folks
    • Angry survivors
    • Exhausted women who are just “done”
    • Confused Christians
    • Searchers and seekers
    • Grievers
    • The Guilty
    • The Shamed
    • Anyone who just only ever wanted to be loved. (Especially you, precious one.)

    You can now get All the Scary Little Gods on Amazon in the following formats: Kindle, paperback, or Audible ($19.99). 


    Read the show notes and/or ask Natalie a question here


    If you are a Christian woman who thinks you may be in an emotionally destructive marriage, learn more at https://flyingfreenow.com

    I'll send you (free!) the first chapter of my book, Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage, which has an assessment to help you figure out if your relationship is abusive or not. All you have to do is hop on my mailing list

    You can also find out about our online education and support program for women of faith at https://joinflyingfree.com.

    And finally, if you are a divorced Christian woman who wants to take back her life and get healthy, lose weight, have amazing relationships, get things done, build a business or career, and even find a good man (if you want one) - check out Flying Higher.

    Deconstructing Your Faith Without Losing Yourself

    Deconstructing Your Faith Without Losing Yourself

    Deconstruction can seem daunting, and you might find yourself becoming fearful of even starting. But let me tell you this: Deconstruction doesn’t have to mean losing your church family. Deconstruction doesn’t have to mean losing your faith. Deconstruction doesn’t have to mean losing your relationship with God.


    In today’s episode, Angela Herrington joins us to talk about the following:

    • How faith deconstruction intersects with the process of healing from emotional and spiritual abuse
    • How you can deconstruct and still keep your church and the people within it who matter to you
    • What role forgiveness plays in our faith journey if we’ve experienced abuse, and so much more. 

    Read the show notes and/or ask Natalie a question here


    If you are a Christian woman who thinks you may be in an emotionally destructive marriage, learn more at https://flyingfreenow.com

    I'll send you (free!) the first chapter of my book, Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage, which has an assessment to help you figure out if your relationship is abusive or not. All you have to do is hop on my mailing list

    You can also find out about our online education and support program for women of faith at https://joinflyingfree.com

    And finally, if you are a divorced Christian woman who wants to take back her life and get healthy, lose weight, have amazing relationships, get things done, build a business or career, and even find a good man (if you want one) - check out Flying Higher.

    All the Scary Little Gods: More Insider Scoop on My New Book

    All the Scary Little Gods: More Insider Scoop on My New Book

    We are gearing up for the release of my brand new book, All the Scary Little Gods, which will be available on Amazon in Kindle, paperback, and Audible formats on February 20th.


    In this episode, you’ll get some more sneak peeks including the foreword by Dr. Tiffany Yecke Brooks and chapters about my first kiss in college plus a time when I thought “crying out to God” would bring back some mail-in-rebate money. (That’s right. You’ll have to listen to believe it.) 


    Laugh, cry, and roll your eyes with me in this sneak peek episode! 


    Read the show notes and/or ask Natalie a question here


    If you are a Christian woman who thinks you may be in an emotionally destructive marriage, learn more at https://flyingfreenow.com

    I'll send you (free!) the first chapter of my book, Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage, which has an assessment to help you figure out if your relationship is abusive or not. All you have to do is hop on my mailing list

    You can also find out about our online education and support program for women of faith at https://joinflyingfree.com

    And finally, if you are a divorced Christian woman who wants to take back her life and get healthy, lose weight, have amazing relationships, get things done, build a business or career, and even find a good man (if you want one) - check out Flying Higher.

    Doesn't the Bible Say to Remove the Log From Your Own Eye?

    Doesn't the Bible Say to Remove the Log From Your Own Eye?

    Have you ever been told to, “first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will be able to see clearly to remove the speck from your brother's eye” in regards to your emotionally abusive marriage? That passage of the Bible is often used to mutualize the sin of the abuser and his victim. This is called sin-leveling, and it’s a form of spiritual abuse. 


    Karen McMahon is here to show us how to take back the meaning of these verses to empower and strengthen ourselves. 


    Read the show notes and/or ask Natalie a question here


    If you are a Christian woman who thinks you may be in an emotionally destructive marriage, learn more at https://flyingfreenow.com

    I'll send you (free!) the first chapter of my book, Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage, which has an assessment to help you figure out if your relationship is abusive or not. All you have to do is hop on my mailing list

    You can also find out about our online education and support program for women of faith at https://joinflyingfree.com

    And finally, if you are a divorced Christian woman who wants to take back her life and get healthy, lose weight, have amazing relationships, get things done, build a business or career, and even find a good man (if you want one) - check out Flying Higher.

    The Symbolism on the Cover of All the Scary Little Gods

    The Symbolism on the Cover of All the Scary Little Gods

    During the entire year of 2023, I wrote a book. It was not an easy book for me to write, emotionally, and I’m glad to be done and even more glad to release it into the world soon. In this episode, I discuss why I titled my new book, All the Scary Little Gods, and I explain the symbolism on the front cover.

    Please note: In today's episode, which was recorded several months ago, I mention that All the Scary Little Gods will be released on February 22nd, 2024. It will now be released on February 20th, 2024!

    Read the show notes and/or ask Natalie a question here


    If you are a Christian woman who thinks you may be in an emotionally destructive marriage, learn more at https://flyingfreenow.com

    I'll send you (free!) the first chapter of my book, Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage, which has an assessment to help you figure out if your relationship is abusive or not. All you have to do is hop on my mailing list

    You can also find out about our online education and support program for women of faith at https://joinflyingfree.com

    And finally, if you are a divorced Christian woman who wants to take back her life and get healthy, lose weight, have amazing relationships, get things done, build a business or career, and even find a good man (if you want one) - check out Flying Higher.

    Strategies to Deal with Toxic Communication Cycles

    Strategies to Deal with Toxic Communication Cycles

    “Communication is key,” right? But healthy communication often isn’t possible with an emotionally abusive individual who twists your words and uses them against you. 


    Today’s conversation is with Mikki Gardner, Certified Life + Conscious Parenting Coach. Mikki’s expertise and knowledge will help propel you forward as you learn how to deal with toxic communication cycles in the context of co-parenting.


    Read the show notes and/or ask Natalie a question here


    If you are a Christian woman who thinks you may be in an emotionally destructive marriage, learn more at https://flyingfreenow.com

    I'll send you (free!) the first chapter of my book, Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage, which has an assessment to help you figure out if your relationship is abusive or not. All you have to do is hop on my mailing list

    You can also find out about our online education and support program for women of faith at https://joinflyingfree.com

    And finally, if you are a divorced Christian woman who wants to take back her life and get healthy, lose weight, have amazing relationships, get things done, build a business or career, and even find a good man (if you want one) - check out Flying Higher.

    When You are Lonely and Sad in Your Christian Marriage

    When You are Lonely and Sad in Your Christian Marriage

    “I’m really struggling with feeling extremely lonely. How did you deal with this in a healthy way?


    “How do you cope with loneliness? A shattered, broken heart?”


    “We don’t speak to each other at all most of the time, so I just get really lonely for human fellowship and interaction.”


    “I’m feeling really isolated. I just feel sad and alone.”


    “I need help dealing with how lonely I feel all the time.


    Do these expressions of loneliness feel familiar to you? Then today’s episode is for you.


    Read the show notes and/or ask Natalie a question here


    If you are a Christian woman who thinks you may be in an emotionally destructive marriage, learn more at https://flyingfreenow.com

    I'll send you (free!) the first chapter of my book, Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage, which has an assessment to help you figure out if your relationship is abusive or not. All you have to do is hop on my mailing list

    You can also find out about our online education and support program for women of faith at https://joinflyingfree.com

    And finally, if you are a divorced Christian woman who wants to take back her life and get healthy, lose weight, have amazing relationships, get things done, build a business or career, and even find a good man (if you want one) - check out Flying Higher.