Americarnage

Nat, Mike and Dan are back together again after Hollywood being on IR with a nipple last week so they're so excited that talk turns immediately to biscuits and Nat reveals a heart-rending formative experience.

In other news: talk turns quickly to NCAA basketball and Dan has an opinion on this; Mike talks World War 1 and Nat talk Spongebob, making Mike jealous as he didn't get to see the movie; apparently we've got the balance about right; lots of sports things happen, listen to find out about them; #fightmadness is still going and hilarious; loads of Bodean's Mailbag goodness and indeed much, much more...

Also, please do sign up to the ESPN player using the promo code podcast2015 to be in with a chance of winning an awesome telly.

Nat and Mike are so sad that Dan isn't here this week that they plain forget to celebrate, something which is very strange indeed until you realise that all-pro 'Carnage favourite and master of all things sporting MR Erik Janssen is in the house and his hypnotic presence has the guys enraptured...

In other news: for some reason the budget gets discussed; Erik is in fact a creepy step-relation but has the world's greatest collection of sports crap in his attic; NFL free agency keeps happening and ther's a hell of a lot to get through; defences have been the main winners but don't stand still near Chip Kelly, he'll trade you; we talk to our mate Andrew Joseph in Arixzona about March Madness; then we talk about more March Madness and #FightMadness; Erik does hockey, then tests the hell out of Nat and Mike with the first ever guest-made game. Bodeans mailbag of course and much, much more...

Also, make sure you keep heading to www.espnplayer.com/espnplayer/ncaa
...to sign up for the ESPN player and catch all the March Madness games live or on demand. Code podcast2015 in the promo box puts you in with a chance of winning a telly so awesome Mike can't conceive of its abilities...

Nat, Mike and Dan are ageless creatures who exist not like normal human beings, sustained by food and drink, rather they are driven on by the power of sports punditry (plus maybe a little Jamesons here and there) but they do still celebrate the anniversary of their coming to this plane of existance. This week there's much to celebrate with an Iron Birthday, the beginning of March Madness and some very special news from our friends at ESPN...

In other news: Phil (da?) Producer's in the house and has been talking to Russel Brand; Mike has the joke box, this is obvious immediately; it's national Punch A Producer week and the gang seem strangely keen to take part; Mike talks Wolf Hall; Dan is running several marathons for charity, he's very runny these days; lots of NFL free agency stuff; some hockey things; March Madness is very nearly here and we're so excited we got Andrew Joseph, sports supremo from The Arizona Republic to lay it our for you; if that wasn't enough we've hooked up with ESPN to offer you the best way to watch all that good stuff on the ESPN Player and win a telly too...! I know, we're far too good to you. There is of course much, much more but you knew that, right?

Nat's on IR this week so Mike slips into the host's chair with the ease of a man passing a joke box. Amazingly enough, he has his joke box with him, something which amazes and delights both Dan and man of the hour and Sport Creator Mr Marek Larwood.

In other news: Dan has run a long way; the show is going weekly again for a while - March Madness basically, thanks to ESPN and the ESPN Player (remember this plug, you will need to love it); films get discussed in surprising range and sensitivity but don't worry, it won't happen again; franchise time has happened and there were very few surprises; basketball is happening and Kobe got kicked in the dick; NCAA basketball is happening and you need to get involved; in the NHL the Canadienes are doing surprisingly well, much to Mike and Dan's delight; an Oscar post-mortem (we're well current) and much, much more...

Nat, Mike and Dan are well known for their film knowledge and seeing as we're in the grip of awards season they tackle the big question: what if Oscar the Grouch was nominated, but didn't win...?

In other news: Mike talks poetry; Dan talks Stephen Hawking sex; Nat talks SNL and the debate spins on to difficult territory; Mike busks a round-up but does surprisingly well talking all about the hired and fired in the NFL; Dan uses a script and somehow does worse; the All-Star game is officially shit, but we've known that for years; actual Oscar picks happen; loads of Bodean's mailbag goodness including possibly our favourite email ever and much, much more...

Nat, Mike and Dan are all in one place for the second week in a row (a record for 2015) to witness the much-lamented return of HdP from his Nicaraguan adventures. They don't let this get in the way of a good old fashioned Super Bowl dissection so there's still a reason to listen...

In other news: Big thanks for Ann for keeping the good ship 'Carnage on a fine course; Dan talks miscarriage of justice documentaries; Mike makes all take pause using a Hemmingway story; Nat talks Springsteen-related things - who knew he liked the guy?!; Osi Umenora is a Katy Perry fan, Gethen failed to get her number for him; Mike runs down XLIX so no need to say any more here; in the NBA, Atlanta lead the East; Golden State lead the West; Atlant's streak broke on the unlikely shoulder of the New Orleans Pelicans; Kobe news: still injured. But is going to be in an HBO doc called ‘A Legend Unguarded’; Tampa Bay lead the East from Montreal; while Nashville have finally displaced Anaheim as the leaders of the West; the league is all about Peel Gate - on Monday the NHL suspended controversial referee Tim Peel, not for the several bad calls he has made recently, but because he met Puck Daddy’s Greg Wyshinksi in a Manhattan bar, and posed drinking tequila the night before the game; loads of Bodean's Mailbag goodness; a game which works surprisingly well and much, much more...

Harry's still away, and there's no Hollywood Dan, but Nat and Mike are joined by Matthew Phillips - a stats man when it comes to College Football. He takes us deep into the College game and looks ahead to the upcoming draft picks. 

In other news: Mike attempts to steal from the guest; Volfsball makes a brief return; and we let listeners know where the hell we've been. 

Hollywood Dan is back, but with Nat away this week we've had to bring in Nat's Soundbox as a substitute. The Mike and Dan are joined by The Guardian's James Dart, who weighs in on the big Super Bowl chat.

In other news: Dan gets showered with gifts; the guys chat balls with deflate-gate; you can join in on Dan's Oscars game; and maybe you'll be seeing Americarnage on Tinder soon. 

This week Nat and Mike (still no Hollywood Dan) are joined by stand up comedian James Shakeshaft, who gets us up to speed on Japanese baseball. We've got chat about deflate-gate, Seattle v Greenbay, and some British soccer. 

In other news: Nat gets a new Springsteen album; Harry's still lost in Nicaragua; the team discuss podcasts; and Mike's been watching French films again. 

Nat and Mike are all hopped up on christmas cheer this week and it has nothing to do with the fact that Hollywood is on IR with a knee. No, they're stoked to find that for the next few weeks while HdP is on his drug-muling duties in central America they will be being produced by AdP - Ann the (da?) Producer...

In other news: Mike knows numbers when they're read to him; Nat wants to hear where you listen to the show. Nothing shady, promise; Mike watches another film, it's like he's some sort of journalist or something; Manziel starts a game, did you hear?; the Jets can't even tank a season properly; lots of other things happen, if I told you all about them here you wouldn't listen to the show, right? The show where there is much, much more...

Four years and a few months ago, soon-to-be Hollywood Dan met Nat and Mike and said 'I love it when you guys work together, let's do a podcast' and they said yes. Then Dan called the only audio guy he knew who works for tennants super and Americarnage was born! That was four years ago and it's frankly amazing it's lasted this long. To make it last another four years, buy the merch at www.americarange.co.uk/shop

In other news: Dan changes kitty litter; Mike went on the piss in his suit years back; Nat went to see Penguins of Madagascar; the Cowboys are STILL IN THE HUNT somehow; JJ Watt is still amazing; so is Andrew Luck; Peyton has a mare; in the NHL Pittsburgh and Tampa Bay AND Detroit are tied for the lead at the East; the New York Islanders and Montreal are not far behind; Anaheim lead Vancouver and St Louis in the West; NBA-wise Toronto lead the East, from Atlanta – and Milwaukee are also in the playoff spots; Golden State are now 17 and 2 after 12 straight, and lead the West from Houston; Dan come up with another great game; loads of Bodeans Mailbag goodness and much, much more...

Nat and Mike often fain happiness when Dan has to bow to his busy schedule and miss a show but this week Mike actually breaks into song. You've been warned.

In other news: All-Pro (just) David Whitney brightens the studio with his presence; David's loyal support of the New York Football Giants kicks things off very nicely indeed; Mike talks police procedurals; Nat talks about the exploitative nature of wrestling; Iron Mike delivers a Manziel-free round-up; then a Kobe-free round-up; it's almost like he knows there are other players in their respective sports, who knew? Loads of great questions; HdP prepares a Twit or Twat for the guys and of course there's much, much more...

Nat and Mike are sportsmen of great and varied prowess, always seeking the fresh challenge and ready to give their all to triumph in a new arena. These past years they have wept, for there were no more worlds left to conquer as no new popular sport has been invented in a hundred years. This was only because Marek Larwood had yet to invent... Volfsball!

In other news: Thanksgiving means more football than you could possibly digest... Unless you head to the Number 1 Sports Bar in Old Street, London, England to catch Iron Mike presenting some tasty NFL action; Marek elucidates the principals and heritage of Volfsball; Nat talks films and stuff; Mike talks telly and things; NFL coaches have had a rubbish week - Mike Smith and Rex Ryan in particular; RGIII should totally go to the Vikings to make the circle complete; Odell Beckham caught the ball or something; baseball gets a look-in this week; Marek talks basketball and Mike talks hockey, in between plenty of quality action from the Bodean's Mailbag and of course much, much more...

Nat, Mike and Dan are, of course, the subject of many a fantasy (league) but this week Mike and Dan have a set-to about The Fall, which Mike likes and Dan thinks... Well, that's in the show, innit?

In other news: JJ Watt keeps catching balls and running them places; the Pats have their once-a-season steamrollering of the Colts sorted for this year; in the NBA, Toronto still lead the East from Washington. Memphis still lead the West from Washington; Philadelphia are bottom of the east with 10 losses and no wins; Kobe is still going for records and pissing people off; in the NHL Montreal are back on top of the East from Tampa Bay (despite being shut out in Pittsburgh last night); Anaheim lead the West from Nashville; loads of Bodeans Mailbag goodies and a kick-ass game from Dan round out the week. Oh wait - there's still much, much more...

Nat, Mike and Dan are men of distinction with refined tastes to match. Luckily Browns fan and master of rum Mr Paul McFadyen is on this show this week and brings the gang a treat which is beyond even their high standards. Except Dan who shuns the booze in favour of shotgunning bottles of covonia under the table...

In other news: Paul talks sport, Mike talks novels, Dan nearly has fights and Nat talks Counting Crows - which one do you think got the best reaction? Dez Bryant slays the London Jaguars; the Packers trample the Bears; Carson Palmer has a big pile of money and no season left; Mark Sanchez doesn't do most of the things attributed to him; in the NBA, Toronto lead the East - yes, Toronto! – from Chicago and Miami; Memphis lead the West from Houston and Golden State; Kobe Bryant now has the most missed shots in NBA history; NHL-wise Tampa Bay lead the east from Montreal who are making a minor comeback with three straight wins and Vancouver lead the West after Anaheim lost three straight in Overtime; loads of Bodeans Mailbag goodness; lots of drinky goodness and much, much more...

As regular listeners may have noticed over the years, Nat, Mike and especially Dan like to say things occasionally which might not be to everyone's taste. The sort of things you probably wouldn't drop into conversations with your parents, your partner or indeed the Marques de Sade. This week is no different in that respect except Dan's found a list of unique insults from around the world and made a game out of them. So, y'know, you were warned.

In other news: it's fireworks night so Mike blows up Nat's intro; Dan loves a boaster; Mike talks Dylan; Nat talks cartoons; Dan talks documentaries; in the NFL, the Pats answer the critics; the Steelers are copying their scores and Big Ben is throwing mental scores; the Rams edge out the niners; the Saints lead the south; Buffalo seem relevant, this scares everyone; in baseball the World Series gets its post-mortem, seeing as our recording dates are eerily crap for the way that's gone; basketball is happening again and all anyone can talk about is Lebron; in Miami the Heat shot out to a three game winning streak thanks mainly to Chris Bosh, who stepped out from Lebron’s shadow; in slapshot land, Pittsburgh leads the East from Tampa Bay and Montreal, Anaheim still lead the west from Vancouver and bloody Calgary; loads of Bodeans Mailbag goodness; Dans insult game and much, much more...

Nat and Mike have brains like the finest Swiss clocks - constructed by master craftsmen, honed to perfection and capable of the finest divisions imaginable. It's this level of intellect that allows them to work out that Dan isn't here this week because SPurs are playing and the man with them in the studio is none other than all-pro 'Carnage college ball expert Mr Ben Isaacs.

In other news: Americarnage gets downloaded lots of places, maybe even North Korea; Wembley was a great game but the weirdness pitchside was almost as good - anyone know who DJ Ray is? Ben talks Wembley hospitality; Mike's been watching Neighbours. He says it's something else but it's from Australia so it's got to be Neighbours; Nat gets more email from shady places and watches a film that's currently showing, which is odd; more NFL goodness than you can shake a rather large stick at; MLB stuff which will be out of date by the time you hear it but is great reference material anyway; Ben talks college ball; NHL fighty stuff happens; NBA is off again and we love it; loads of Bodeans Mailbag goodness and much, much more...

Nat, Mike and Dan are cultured individuals with the sort of address books which would make royalty feel a bit out of the loop, so when the question of who they'd have at their ideal dinner party comes up they of course come out with some of the finest suggestions...

In other news: Hallow'een outfits are discussed because, y'know, adults; Dan read a book he bought at the airport, it's better than most things you find there; Mike's been at the London Film Festival and has picked out some goodies; Nat, true to form, talks about a film from several years ago; 509 week in the NFL as Peyton once again proves he's probably the best there ever was; the Cowboys run over the Giants; the Packers smath the Panthers; Indy humiliate the Bengals; the Wembley game gets talked over and let's just hope it ain't a walk-over; in the NHL the Candiens lead the East from Tanpa Bay and Anahgeim lead the West from Nashville; Detroit are angry about the goal Pavelk Datsuyk socred that was rubbed off because of alleged interference on Habs goalie Carey Price; the World Series is going and the games are good but the names are better; the NBA has signed a huge new TV deal extension with Tunrer Broadcasting for 9 years and is three times the size of the  existing one – 2.66 bn a year compared to a measly 930 million; loads of great Bodeans Mailbag goodness and much, much more...

Nat, Mike and Dan are back in an all-pro line-up after last week's terrible fail. To make up for it they've crammed 46% more references into this week's show, something as useless as it is unprovable...

In other news: Dan pioneers movie reviews through noises; it's Lynch vs. Fincher and we all know who's going to come out on top there; Nat gets needlessly aggressive; Mike goes to film festivals; in the NFL, everybody loves Pat McAfee and not just for his virus-control properties; Kap can throw things occasionally; there's a tied game and the entire of America goes mental with anguish; Romo hasn't choked... Yet; the NHL season is underway and the LA Kings paraded the Stanley Cup around the Staples Centre then got whupped by the Sharks; the NBA has a new TV deal for the GDP of several small countries and already a lot of star players *cough, Lebron, cough* are acting like a-holes about money; loads of Bodeans Mailbag goodness, loads of references (or did we mention that already?) and much, much more...

With Nat on IR this week the Iron One slides into the hosts chair just in time to witness Dan's glorious return from the states and Phil (da Producer) Spooner's glorious return from, um, Stratford and the discussion immediately turns to Scottish independence. Y'know, cos we keep it current. Then we get to Draft Day and all gets better...

In other news: Phil has a nostalgic experience, Dan talks charming crackheads - these two things are related; Mike talks Draft Day; more NFL fun than you can shake a challenge flag at, including the International Series' first coach-sacking; Dallas look surprisingly good; the Pats look creaky as hell; Indy look good; Tampa surprise; NHL preseason is well and truly underway. Jeff Carter nabbed a hat trick in the King’s Preseason game against the Ducks; NBA press day saw Kobe let both barrels lose on former Lakers coach Mike D’Antononi; Phil makes a very fine point on this; one-game playoffs in the MLB feel strange; loads of Bodeans goodness and of course, much, much more...