Inner Work With MaryAnn Walker

Often times when we are triggered and find ourselves emotionally reactive, it's because we are making it mean something about us. 

For example, maybe your friend didn't receive your experience or follow your advice, and you're making it mean your experience doesn't hold value. 

Or maybe your partner doesn't want to do the activity you want to do and you're making it mean that they don't care about you or you are no longer compatible. 

Or maybe someone makes an "ugly face" and you assume it was meant for you and the don't like you. 

But may it's not about you. 

Maybe your friend wants to figure things out on her own. 

Maybe your partner likes different things, and that's ok. 

Maybe they weren't making a face at you, but smelled something stinky. 

Maybe it has nothing to do with you. 

What helps you to feel heard?  What causes you to feel unheard?  And how can you deepen your level of listening to deepen your relationships? 

This is exactly what I'm talking about with my friend and fellow coach, Kelly Legath. Find her on instagram @daydreamercoaching or at www.daydreamercoaching.com

Want to connect with MaryAnn?  Click here to connect on social media: https://linktr.ee/maryannwalker.life

Click here to apply to work with her: https://maryannwalker.life/contact-me

What could you do in a minute?  And how could a minute change your life? 

Maybe you're taking one minute to make that phone call you've been putting off. 

Maybe you use your minute to do 100 jumping jacks. 

Maybe you use your minute to just... breathe... but find one minute today and see how impactful you can make that minute. 

Are you tired of constantly saying yes to others while neglecting your own needs? Do you find yourself feeling overwhelmed and burnt out from always putting others first?

In today's fast-paced world, learning to say no is a vital skill for maintaining your well-being and reclaiming your time. In this episode we explore the challenges of saying no and offer practical strategies for setting boundaries with compassion and confidence.

Discover how saying no can empower you to prioritize self-care, establish healthier relationships, and find greater peace and balance in your life. If you're ready to break free from the cycle of overcommitment and embrace the power of no, this episode is for you.

Listen now and unlock the transformative potential of saying no. And if you're interested in diving deeper into this topic, feel free to reach out—I'd be happy to send you more resources or discuss how my coaching services can support you on your journey.

Here's to honoring your authenticity and reclaiming your power!

https://linktr.ee/maryannwalker.life

It is easy to assume that because someones experience or proximity is similar, that it is the same. Assuming sameness negatively impacts empathy and connection. 

Work to be curiously compassionate towards others. Ask what their experience is... and the believe them!  You may just be surprised at the insights that can be gained when we allow ourselves to be curious about another's perspective or experience. 86

This week on the podcast, we're diving into the crucial topic of rest. Sometimes our need for rest goes beyond the physical. Identifying what our actual need is helps us to feel rested and rejuvenated.

Let me share with you the seven different types of rest, as described by Saundra Dalton-Smiths work:

Physical Rest:
Check if you're experiencing pain or having trouble sleeping.
Consider activities like yoga, stretching, or a massage to care for your physical needs.

Mental Rest:
Ideal for those struggling to turn off their brain.
Take short breaks throughout the day, and consider journaling to clear your mind.

Sensory Rest:
For those surrounded by constant stimuli.
Unplug from devices, turn off notifications, and create moments of stillness.

Creative Rest:
Awaken wonder and awe inside you.
Spend time in nature or engage in creative activities just for fun, without the intention to sell.

Emotional Rest:
Essential for helpers, healers, and people pleasers.
Set boundaries, take time for yourself, and be honest about your emotions.

Social Rest:
If you need me-time, you likely need social rest too.
Surround yourself with people who genuinely fill your cup.

Spiritual Rest:
Goes beyond the physical and mental.
Find pockets of peace, engage in spiritual practices, and connect with a sense of love and belonging.

As you go through this list, do a self-assessment. Notice what lights you up, brings you joy, and fulfills your heart's yearnings. Our needs may change over time, so revisit this list periodically. And remember, your people are out there – those who resonate with you and understand your wavelength.

Saundra's Ted Talk: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZGNN4EPJzGk&t=330s
Online Quiz: https://www.restquiz.com/quiz/rest-quiz-test/
Apply to work with me: https://maryannwalker.life/contact-me
Connect with me on social media: https://linktr.ee/maryannwalker.life

Wishing you a restful and rejuvenating week ahead!

Introducing our new mini Monday episodes! Here, I'll be sharing some insightful mindfulness tips to help you enhance your self-awareness and receptivity.

This morning's musing revolves around the concept of creating more empty space in our lives to receive personal guidance and inspiration.

In today's fast-paced world, we often prioritize productivity and multitasking. While it might make us appear highly accomplished externally, it can leave us feeling disconnected internally, affecting our receptivity to new ideas and insights.

So, here's a challenge for you today: pick one activity and commit to being fully present with it. Whether it's meal prepping, making your bed, or driving to the store, immerse yourself in the moment. Take a break from podcasts, audiobooks, and your phone. Just be there, fully present, and observe what shifts occur within you.

For instance, I recently tried this while taking a walk in the park. Instead of listening to music or checking my phone, I focused solely on the sounds of nature and the sensation of each step. It was incredibly refreshing and helped me tune into my surroundings in a way I hadn't before.

Give it a try and let me know how it goes for you! Remember, creating space for stillness can lead to profound insights and moments of clarity. Stay tuned for more mindfulness tips in our upcoming episodes.

In today's episode, we're diving into a topic that hits close to home for many of us: the fear of being seen as selfish. It's a struggle we've all faced, especially those of us who genuinely enjoy lending a helping hand. Let's break it down together:

Understanding "Selfishness":   Being selfish means not considering others' needs. Interestingly,  it's those who are most considerate of others who often worry the most about being selfish.

Imagining Judgment: Saying "no" might lead to judgment. But here's the thing: how others perceive us isn't entirely in our control. Their thoughts and actions are about them, not us.

Self-Assessment Tips: Take a moment to reflect on a recent situation, think about the emotions driving your actions, and remember that other people's opinions aren't the whole story.

Spotting Unbalanced Relationships: Using Anna and Sarah's story, we talk about how accusations of selfishness often reveal more about the accuser than the accused. By journaling about our actions and theirs, we can uncover any imbalances in our relationships.

Empowerment Through Boundaries: Setting boundaries isn't selfish; it's essential for healthy relationships. Let's flip the script from feeling guilty to feeling empowered.

Just a reminder: we're only responsible for our own actions. If you found this episode helpful or if you want suppor around learning how to say no, click the link to message me. I'm happy to coach you through it.  

https://linktr.ee/maryannwalker.life

Are you someone who is highly sensitive to the emotions? Maybe you're highly sensitive when it comes to reading others microexpressions, tone, and body language. If so, it's highly likely that sometimes you struggle with not only others emotions, but your own emotions around others having feelings.

If you are highly sensitive to the emotional state of others, it can be really easy to assume that YOU are the ones responsible for the upset. But this isn't always the case.

Before over-owning your contribution to a situation and getting caught up in your own worry loop, slow it down and gather more information.

For example, rather than assuming that someone is upset with you, ask how they are doing:

"You're more quiet than usual. Are you doing ok?"
"You seem upset. How are you?"
"What's up?"

Asking questions helps to bring more clarity to the situation while also providing an opportunity for both parties to own and process their own emotions.

Second, learn now to manage your own emotions.

Highly sensitive people want to feel good which often times means making sure everyone around them feels good, too.  This means doing whatever they can do to placate others.

The thing is, when we invest our energy into placating and managing others emotions, we are not managing our own emotions.

And while we can influence how others feel, we can't control their emotions.

Learning to feel and process our own emotions AND allowing others the opportunity to learn how to feel and process their emotions is a sign of emotional maturity.

Remember, trying to manage others' emotions denies them the chance to learn and grow. Embrace uncertainty, let go of control, and practice open communication.

Want to learn more? Come and listen to this weeks podcast episode! If you find this helpful, share it with a friend or leave a review.

Click here to find me on my other platforms or apply to work with me! https://linktr.ee/maryannwalker.life

Why We Tolerate Mistreatment:
In this episode we explore three key reasons why people pleasers tolerate mistreatment: a tendency to think the best of others, the belief they can change people through kindness, and sometimes, struggles with low self-esteem. We examine the stories we tell ourselves and the excuses we make for others, ultimately enabling their behavior.

The Attraction of Manipulative People:
Kind and selfless individuals often attract unkind and manipulative people. Why? Because people pleasers take on the lion's share of the relationship work, allowing manipulative individuals to avoid accountability. But how do we navigate this dynamic without sacrificing our own well-being?

Practical Strategies:
I share two practical strategies to break free from the cycle of mistreatment. First, practice stating your truth. I share ways to assert self without exerting control. Second, practice allowing others to respond to your new sense of boundaries without taking ownership of their reactions. They might not like being told "no," but that is about them. Not you. 

Short-Term Discomfort for Long-Term Peace:
While speaking up for yourself may feel uncomfortable initially, tolerating mistreatment is unsustainable and leads to resentment. We discuss the importance of mindful navigation to avoid explosive blow-ups, emphasizing that the discomfort of change is well worth the lasting peace it can bring.

A Reminder:
As a highly sensitive individual, remember that not everyone is as attuned to emotions as you are. Speaking up for yourself might not be as hurtful to others as you imagine. Clear communication is an act of kindness, offering both parties clarity and understanding. It's about finding the balance between assertiveness and empathy.

Conclusion:
If these examples hit close to home, and you're ready to stand in your power, consider seeking support. I've personally experienced transformation through coaching, and if you resonate with this journey, I'm here to help. Thank you for being part of this community; your reviews and shares empower us to reach and support more people. Wishing you a fantastic week ahead, and until next time, take care!

To apply to work with me or find my other platforms containing free content, click here: https://linktr.ee/maryannwalker.life

Our brain often links discomfort with danger, making simple tasks like getting out of bed, stepping out of our comfort zone, or pursuing opportunities seem more daunting than they actually are.

Understanding that this discomfort is merely a caution signal, not an actual threat, empowers us to distinguish ourselves from self-limiting thoughts. This week, we're delving into how to recognize areas where we think we choose comfort and actively opting for discomfort that's more likely to yield long-term comfort.

Take a moment to envision something you truly desire, and journal about the discomfort you're willing to endure to get it. Discomfort is inevitable, but choosing which form of discomfort we are willing to experience on purpose to get what we want on purpose and with intention can make all the difference. 

For instance:

• You may feel uncomfortable in a job interview, OR you'll feel uncomfortable being unemployed.
• You may feel uncomfortable waking up early for the gym, but it is also uncomfortable desiring a body you don't currently have.
• Putting yourself out there to make friends can be uncomfortable, yet so is the discomfort of loneliness.

Now, ask yourself:

• What discomfort am I willing to experience to create the marriage I want?
• What discomfort am I  prepared to face for the job I desire?
• What discomfort am I willing to experience for the body I desire? 
• What discomfort am I willing to confront for the life I aspire to have?

Discomfort is inevitable, but the right actions pave the way for the results you desire. While the temptation to stay in bed is natural, don't be too hard on yourself – you're human. Yet, if you're genuinely committed to crafting the life you seek, it's time to get out of bed and take steps toward your aspirations!

Want to connect on my other platforms or work with me one on one? Click here! 

This week we are getting curious about what comes up for us when we either see someone else celebrating their wins, or we have a win of our own to share. For some, celebrating comes easy, for others, not so much. This week is all about getting curious about what is coming up for YOU. There is so much information to be gained when we are able to recognize not only what we think and feel around other people's successes , but also what we are thinking and feeling when we are entertaining the idea of celebrating our own success. As you get curious about your internal reaction to another's success, notice if you're thinking thoughts like: 

• Why couldn't that be me? 
• They just got lucky. There is no way that they're going to be able to repeat that success. 
• I wish that I could have what they have. It's just not fair. 
• Their success somehow takes away from my success or the success of others. 
• I don't want to hear about it. It just makes me feel worse about my life. 

Some common hesitations around sharing ones own success are: 

• What if others don't support me? 
• It's not that big of a deal. It's not really something worth celebrating .
• What if I share my success this time, but the next time I do this, I fail? That would be so embarrassing. So it's better for me to just not share at all. 
• I don't want to be seen as cocky. I need to be humble. And that means that I shouldn't talk about my success. 
• Others have achieved so much more. So really my success isn't that big of a deal. 

Notice not only what the thoughts are that are arising, but notice what these thoughts create for you. More than likely the above thoughts are not going to create warm, fuzzy and supportive feelings. As we increase our capacity to celebrate ourselves and intentionally eliminate thoughts of comparison, it not only increases our capacity to celebrate others, but our own sense of abundance. Try on these more abundant celebratory thoughts and see how they feel: 

• I’ve worked hard for this, and that hard work is something to be celebrated!
• Sharing my success can show others what is possible and inspire them to achieve their goals. 
• This wasn’t a fluke. I know all the work that went into this and that hard work is paying off! 
• By sharing my wins, I set a positive example for others to celebrate their achievements, too.
• My success can empower others to believe in their capability and pursue their dreams.
• I am my own best cheerleader. 
• I can always celebrate me, even if others don’t have the capacity to do so. 
• Everyone’s journey is unique, and I can celebrate my milestones along my path. 
• My success has a positive impact on me and potentially on those around me. 
• Sharing my success is a way to express joy and gratitude for positive outcomes. 

A more abundant life is just a thought away. And the more we focus on our "wins" the more our mind will be wired to look for them, which reinforces an abundance mindset!

Want to learn more? Come and listen to this weeks podcast episode, Celebrating Wins: A Curious Exploration, on my podcast, Inner Work with MaryAnn Walker. 

Looking for customized support? Click here to apply to work with me. 

And hey, I want to hear what you're celebrating so I can celebrate with you! Click the social media buttons below to share your win! 

Here's to a week of celebrating YOU!

Click here to find me on social media to celebrate your wins or to apply to work with me!  A more abundant life is just a thought away.  Looking for customized support? Click here to apply to work with me!

Are you giving level 10 reactions to level 2 situations? Or maybe you're giving a level 2 reaction to a level 10 situation? Over and under reacting can be a sign that something in your life is out of alignment. But with a little curiosity, self compassion, and mindfulness, it is possible to get back on track!

To connect with MaryAnn on her other platforms,  click here: https://linktr.ee/maryannwalker.life

Find amazing journal prompts at Write Your Wellness here: https://writeyourwellness.com/

Find your own copy of A Mind At Home With Itself here: https://amzn.to/3TNr7RC

Welcome back, dear listeners! Happy New Year! With resolutions in the air, let's explore the power of affirmations and aspirations in shaping our goals.

Affirmations, those positive declarations, work wonders when we genuinely believe them. However, if the magic isn't happening, it's time to consider your aspirations—the goals you're striving toward. Crafting affirmations that align with your aspirations is key. For instance, shift from "I am wealthy" to "I am finding more ways to become financially abundant every day." Small tweaks, big impact.

 As a New Year gift to you, click here to grab 100 bridge thoughts tailored to health, wealth, relationships, and self-worth.

https://maryannwalker-life.ck.page/fbd72512dd

Your thoughts shape your 2024, and if you need support in managing your mind and achieving your goals, I'm here for you. Here's to a fantastic week and an even more incredible year! You've got this.

Want to work together? Click here to apply now! 

In this episode, MaryAnn Walker delivers on her promise to share 10 practical ways to boost your emotional intelligence or emotional maturity. Before diving into these tips, she explains why cultivating emotional maturity is crucial, outlining five compelling reasons.

1. Increase Self-Awareness:
   • Gain insight into your emotions and behaviors.
2. Enhance Interpersonal Relationships:
   • Develop empathy for stronger and more fulfilling connections.
3. Effective Conflict Resolution:
   • Better manage emotions for finding workable solutions.
4. Stress Management:
   • Take ownership of your emotions for self-regulation.
5. Improve Work Performance:
   • Enhance leadership, teamwork, and adaptability.

10 Ways to Increase Emotional Maturity:

1. Assume There Is Always More to Learn:
   • Encourage depth and increase empathy and connection through curious questions.
2. Let Others Have Their Experience:
   • Avoid stealing the spotlight; let them share without interruption.
3. Separate Facts from Your Story
   • Examine situations objectively, distinguishing between facts and interpretations. 
4. Consider the Other Person's Experience:
   • Foster empathy by thinking about their perspective.
5. Save Level 10 Reactions for Level 10 Situations:
   • Match your emotional response to the significance of the situation.
6. Take Responsibility for Your Emotions:
   • Identify and fulfill your emotional needs for self-regulation.
7. Take Responsibility for Your Actions:
   • Acknowledge your role in conflicts, even if it's a small part.
8. Be Clear in Your Requests:
   • Clearly express your needs, avoiding emotional manipulation.
9. Find Middle Ground
   • Notice if you are slipping into black and white thinking and find common ground. Allow space for both experiences and perspectives to exist. 
10. Know That Two Experiences Can Exist at the Same Time:

• Increasing your capacity to feel and process multiple emotions at the same time can increase your capacity to hold space for others joy or pain. 

Want to work with MaryAnn?  Click here to apply!
Click here to connect on other platforms! 

Welcome back, everyone! In today's episode, MaryAnn Walker delves into a common struggle experienced by many helpers, healers, and people pleasers—the challenge of navigating emotional maturity gaps in relationships. MaryAnn explores the problems arising from differences in emotional intelligence levels and offers valuable insights on resolution strategies.

Main Ideas:

1. Self-Reflection on Emotional Maturity:
   • You are the only person you can control. Focus on your own ability to show up in emotionally mature ways.
   • Even evolved individuals can exhibit emotional immaturity at times, especially when sick or under stress.
2. Defining Emotional Maturity:
   • Emotional maturity involves understanding, managing, and expressing emotions constructively.
   • Emotional immaturity signifies underdeveloped emotional skills and an inability to name or communicate emotions and/or needs.  
3. Resolving Communication Styles:
   • Emotionally mature partners create safety for open communication.
   • Less emotionally mature individuals practice gradual expression and non-defensive receptivity to feedback.
4. Navigating the Empathy Gap:
   • Emotionally developed partners often assume that because they have an easier time empathizing, that others should, too. This is not always the case. Be patient and accept people where they are on their emotional intelligence journey. 
5. Effective Conflict Resolution:
   • Differences in emotional intelligence are often magnified during conflict.
   • Seek to find common ground, putting both partners on the same team, and focusing on shared goals.
6. Healthy Coping Mechanisms:
   1. Recognize buffers and practice self-regulation to avoid impeding personal and relationship  growth.
7. Understanding Emotional Needs:
   • Recognizing ones own motional needs improves communication as well as relationship quality.
   • Take ownership of your emotions rather than blaming others.
8. Balancing Emotional Styles:
   • Acknowledge that there are differences when it comes to processing emotions . Respect each other's processing styles.
   • Mutual understanding, patience, and learning can create healthy connection.

Remember, emotional intelligence is a journey, and understanding, patience, and a willingness to learn are essential in building healthier connections. If you resonate with the episode, come back next week to learn 10 ways to increase emotional intelligence!

Want to apply to work with me or connect on other platforms? Click here! https://linktr.ee/maryannwalker.life

Click here get my Winter Solstice Reflections journal and ritual guide! 


Virtual Tip Jar:  Several of you have wondered how you can say thank you for all of the free support I offer on my podcast, so here is a virtual tip jar!  If you find value in the content you've found here, feel free to click to buy me a drink!  Thanks for the love!  I couldn't do what I do without you. 

Welcome back to the podcast! Today, we're diving into the fascinating world of conscious and subconscious thoughts. Picture your mind as a ship, with the captain representing your conscious mind and the crew as your subconscious. While the captain guides for long-term success, the crew sometimes takes charge, causing unexpected twists.

In real life, our subconscious thoughts often dictate our actions, shaping our results. 

To make these subconscious thoughts conscious is to take control. Consider the thoughts: 
"I'm not good enough"  
"I must be perfect to be loved." 
"Nothing ever works out for me."
"I can't change. This is just who I am."
"I must avoid failure at all costs."
"Having success means sacrificing happiness."

Do any of these beliefs resonate with you? Recognizing them is the first step to change.

Our brains seek evidence to confirm our thoughts, influencing our reality. But we can challenge these thoughts, steering our ship deliberately.

Two powerful tools for self-discovery are coaching and journaling. 

A coach provides an external perspective, revealing hidden thoughts. 

Journaling allows you to analyze your thoughts objectively. Highlight facts and separate them from the stories you tell yourself.

Remember, our subconscious aims to protect us, associating discomfort with danger. Be kind to yourself when the captain (conscious mind) is temporarily offline, and the crew (subconscious) takes over. Nurturing your captain mind, especially when tired or stressed, ensures better navigation.

Challenge your subconscious, question its stories, and consciously choose your thoughts. This week, focus on nurturing your captain mind and notice when the crew tries to take control. If you'd like personalized guidance, come and work with me. Click the link to apply now.

https://linktr.ee/maryannwalker.life

Virtual Tip Jar:  Several of you have wondered how you can say thank you for all of the free support I offer on my podcast, so here is a virtual tip jar!  If you find value in the content you've found here, feel free to click to buy me a drink!  Thanks for the love!  I couldn't do what I do without you. 

In this episode, MaryAnn shares a perspective shift on the concept of being the average of the five people you spend the most time with, and, instead, shifting the focus to being the sum of the five people you allow to influence you most. 

The influences may be intentional, like specific podcasts, or unintentional, like social media feed. But coming to recognize the sources of the 5 people or places that influence you the most is the first step towards living more consciously and intentionally. 

First, bring it into your conscious awareness the who and the what that is currently having the most influence on you.

Second, notice the impact that influence is having on you. Is it positive or negative? What is it creating for you?

Third, decide consciously if you want to allow for this source to continue to be one of your top 5 influencers or not.

Additional prompts:
Who are the 5 people currently having significant influence over me?
How do I feel in their presence?
How do I feel when I allow them to influence me?
What 3 qualities or characteristics would most describe this individual?
Are these qualities or characteristics that I want to develop in my personal life or not? Explain.
Do I want to continue to allow this person to be one of my top 5 influencers?

You are the sum of the 5 people you choose to allow to influence you. Choose them on purpose.

If you would like help upleveling your life this year, or maybe you're recognizing that there are some people in your life that are having an influence on you and you don't know how to navigate it, gift yourself a more fulfilling life this Christmas and come and work with me.

I am currently offering 6 weeks for just $625. Click or copy the link to apply now!

https://maryannwalker.life/contact-me

Virtual Tip Jar:  Several of you have wondered how you can say thank you for all of the free support I offer on my podcast, so here is a virtual tip jar!  If you find value in the content you've found here, feel free to click to buy me a drink!  Thanks for the love!  I couldn't do what I do without you. 

This week we are exploring the concept of radical acceptance and psychological flexibility. Radical acceptance is the ability to radically accept what is which increases ones level of psychological flexibly.

For example, once we are able to radically accept what the weather is going to look like for the day, we can adapt to the new information and dress accordingly.

Radical acceptance helps us navigate life with more purpose, direction, and intention improving not only the quality of our life, but potentially the quality of our relationships as well.

Want to book a call?  Let's get in touch!  Click here to connect! 

Virtual Tip Jar:  Several of you have wondered how you can say thank you for all of the free support I offer on my podcast, so here is a virtual tip jar!  If you find value in the content you've found here, feel free to click to buy me a drink!  Thanks for the love!  I couldn't do what I do without you. 

I was recently interviewed for the Raising Confident Kids online summit. 

In this episode I am sharing that interview where I talk about the importance of modeling emotional processing, especially as it pertains to self care. 

Emotions are there to teach us where we are and what we need. The more skilled adult care givers at processing their own emotions, the more those in their care learn from their example, allowing both parties the opportunity to learn to act rather than react emotionally. 

Virtual Tip Jar:  Several of you have wondered how you can say thank you for all of the free support I offer on my podcast, so here is a virtual tip jar!  If you find value in the content you've found here, feel free to click to buy me a drink!  Thanks for the love!  I couldn't do what I do without you.