Just Minhaz

In this episode, Aisha Javed and I discussed the challenges Muslim women face through divorce, including financial independence.

Aishah shared her experience of struggling with financial independence and offered guidance on approaching the issue. Aisha discussed the importance of empowerment and taking small steps towards personal and professional growth, acknowledging that the process may be difficult but stressing the importance of being open to change and networking with the right people.

We delved into the importance of communication in marriages and how it can impact the relationship. Aisha discussed how miscommunication can lead to resentment and arguments and stressed the need to communicate needs and feelings respectfully.

We also explored how past traumas and emotional baggage can affect relationships and attract similar partners. We also touch on the concept of energy and how it can impact the type of partners we attract.

The discussion also covered the complexities of accepting responsibility for divorce and acknowledging the difficulty of facing one's role. We discussed the importance of doing inner work to understand patterns and make changes for future relationships and how this can lead to healthier partnerships. Aisha also discussed the importance of shifting energy towards gratitude and openness to receive rather than solely focusing on providing for others. Emphasizing the healing aspect of letting go and surrendering your deepest fears and how those fears can stem from personal experiences and trauma.

We also delved into the importance of understanding and taking responsibility for one's emotions to let go of them and the need for deep heart work and grieving to release emotions. Aisha encouraged individuals to allow themselves to feel and express their emotions to release them, even if it means revisiting them multiple times.

Be sure to contact Aisha Javed if you resonate with this episode. Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/aishah_javed/

Salamualaykum.

Your partner will trigger the parts of you that you aren’t consciously aware of, and vice versa.

At that moment, we fixate on our partners and try to change them, which leads to two big adults fighting it out like kids.

This is common in relationships and something we have all seen growing up.

Most people aren’t able to work through these moments and brush them under the rug. This leads to a build-up of frustration and resentment, and, ultimately, you both disconnect from each other.

What most of us fail to do in this moment is to see what is coming up as an opportunity rather than another burden.

If you wish to unlock more profound levels of yourself and your strengths, you must be able to look at the parts of you that are running the show unconsciously.

These parts of us are wounded children. They haven’t been able to process what happened to us as kids and continue to operate from a place of fear and self-protection.

Your relationships will be the greatest opportunity for you to become aware of those parts of you. There is a reason marriage is half of our deen. Alhamdulillah.

So when a brother or sister comes to me, and all they talk about is their partner or kids, I will point back at you.

The work always starts with you!

This episode with Franco Zavala centred around personal growth and development, particularly in blended families and step-parenting.

Franco shared his struggles with infertility and negative reactions from loved ones when he decided to become a stepdad. He emphasized the importance of building trust and respect with his stepchildren's mother and earning the trust and respect of his stepchildren to participate in parenting fully.

Franco and I discussed the importance of self-development in becoming a successful stepdad and leader, emphasizing the need to work on personal growth constantly and understanding oneself.

The conversation also touched on the impact of childhood experiences on personal growth and understanding what it means to be a man. Franco emphasized the need to take responsibility for one's own problems and reactions and to be mentally prepared to handle obstacles in life. We also discussed the importance of understanding love languages for effective communication with children and the need to listen to and understand their needs.

The conversation highlighted the importance of personal growth and reflection in becoming a better person and parent. Franco announced his plan to launch a Facebook group called the Blended Family Brotherhood for men, providing a safe space to speak their minds and seek genuine help. The group will have live calls, Q&A videos, and guest speakers. Franco hopes to use this platform to get more speaking engagements and eventually offer one-on-one calls for a fee.

Links to connect with Franco Zavala: 
Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100075996184672
Instagram - 
https://www.instagram.com/theprofessionalstepdad/
Youtube - https://www.youtube.com/c/TheProfessionalStepDadShow
Catch the full episode on all podcast platforms. - https://linktr.ee/justminhaz

Salamaulaykum.

Peace & Love.

Stepping out of your comfort zone is like embarking on a real adventure. It's like straying from your cosy bed and diving into the unknown. Fear will tag along, trying to hold you back, but that's where the magic happens!

You have to face those insecurities head-on! It's like shining a light on the darkest corners of your mind. Instead of running away, confront them and grow stronger. You'll face obstacles, but treat them like stepping stones to success.

As you walk this path, you start questioning those limiting beliefs, those ghosts from the past. They were just illusions. You got the power to do way more than you think!

And here's the deal: it's not about reaching some "perfect" dream reality; it's about embracing the journey of self-discovery. Keep pushing yourself. You're gonna discover your true potential and, with consistency - live a limitless life. All you have to do is take the first step!

Watch my first interview with Muchina from 2021. - https://youtu.be/7enWX9YXcXw Follow

Muchina on Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/muchinamalomba/

Follow Muchina on YouTube - https://youtu.be/D7aEPU8tdsY 

Salamualaykum.

Making change when life forces you to is the most common way we do things we've been holding back on. However, this isn't healthy at all! You will not be someone that can be relied on as a father, a partner or a son. If you wish to become a leader in your field or family, I believe this is the most important trait a man can possess - BRAVERY.

Being brave isn't something you're born with but a SKILL you must develop and build like muscle.

Facing those big hurdles seems impossible, but it isn't if it becomes the next step. What do I mean by that? What seems like a big hurdle now will eventually become the next step.

You start with the smallest tasks, pushing yourself to do the small things you've been holding off on, whether it's cleaning your house, your garage or organising your clothes.

Notice the discomfort that arises as you do it, and commit to finishing what you started no matter how long it takes!

Sounds silly, doesn't it?

How can cleaning out your garage help you achieve your goals?

One word - DISCOMFORT!

Get used to it!

As I said, it's like building muscle! If you can't overcome your mental battle on something as small as this, you won't be able to handle the mental chaos that will come for the things that truly matter to you.

Tune into the full episode for more.

Salamualaykum.

The more you want something, the more you reinforce your current reality (it isn’t here yet). Which is normal to start from, BUT we can easily end up staying there.

We constantly want change, telling everyone around us, but the story never seems to change. Years go by, and you’re still stuck doing the same old ish, saying the same old story to everyone around you.

Why do we do this? - Comfort.

We are comfortable where we are! Your mind will do whatever it can to keep you there as long as it feels comfortable and familiar, even if your current reality sucks.

How do you go from wanting to having? - Discomfort!

You must embody who you think you would be and do if it was already here. These are the fundamental steps you should take, which is helllllllaaaa uncomfortable.

You must let go of the old story and embody a new one. And this is where you will be tested. But persistence is key!

Tune into the full episode for more.

Peace & Love!

Most of us find ourselves taking one step forward and one step back.

Yet, never truly understood why.

One word - SAFETY.

We are hardwired to seek safety. So when you rely on your mind to keep you consistently moving toward a new discipline, you will inevitably find yourself back where you started. Your mind will do whatever it can to take you back to what is familiar.

YOU’RE HARDWIRED THIS WAY!

This isn’t a flaw!

You have to build your self-awareness to the point where you are able to watch the mind, rather than becoming it. Especially in moments when you are about to do something you don’t usually do.

It is possible to change your reality and build habits that will support you. But if you lack self-awareness, you will find yourself just thinking and talking about it.

So next time you take a step towards what you want and you find yourself doubting everything, practice watching your thoughts and emotions rather than becoming them.

This is the key to self-mastery!

📣 I am offering 50% OFF for the next 10 students who join Quantum Leap 2.0.
👉🏾Click here to sign up!

Salamualaykum.

It's who you become the moment you step towards what you want that changes your life, not the treasure. So be brave and take that step and remember, that the real gold is what you uncover about your fears.

Want to build unshakeable confidence?
- I am offering 50% OFF for the following 10 students who want to join Quantum Leap 2.0.

Sign up now to reserve a spot!

Wanting vs having is two different realities!

The more you want something, the more you reinforce your current reality (it isn’t here yet).

Which is normal to start from BUT, we can easily end up staying there.

Constantly want change, telling everyone around us, but the story never seems to change. 🙄

Years go by and you’re still stuck doing the same old ish, saying the same old story to everyone around you.

Why do we do this?

Comfort.

We are comfortable where we are!

Your mind will do whatever it can to keep you there as long as it feels comfortable and familiar, even if your current reality sucks.

How do you go from wanting to having?

Discomfort!

You have to embody who you think you would be and do if it was already here.

These are the fundamental steps you should be taking and this is helllllllaaaa uncomfortable.

You must let go of the old story and embody a new one.

And this is where you will be tested.

But persistence is key!

This is what I teach and guide you through in my program.

I am looking for 10 students to join my updated program (Quantum Leap 2.0) at a huge 50% off - Link in bio.

For more check out my latest episode.
🎧EP.56 - Wanting Vs Having: What’s the Difference?
👉🏾Link in bio.

Salamualaykum ♥️

I have been on a roller coaster of a journey of finding what it really means to be able to show up as a man, as a son, as a husband, and as a father. It's a journey of a lifetime but one thing I know for sure, if you want to grow, go where you are afraid to go. That's why I did. Tune into the entire episode to know why.

Much love,
Minhaz Ahmed.

Where you are right now is a reflection of what you can handle. If you wish to do more, then you are asking for more tension in your life, and when I say tension, I mean resistance and stress. Most people overlook this part and only glorify the good that comes with "success". But, the truth is there will be a lot of challenging moments that will come with success. So if you want more in your life, don't just prepare for the good but also the bad (the stress). Tune in to this episode to hear an example that will explain this concept beautifully.

99% of the time, you will be disappointed with what other people say about your goals and dreams. Yet, many of us seek permission from those who will not give it. This is a cop-out! You are just seeking a way out of actually doing it, and you reinforce your lack of belief by asking people who will say the same.

But what actually happens when we stop asking others? Or even ourselves? What happens when we do something that even we struggle to fully believe in?

You end up making the impossible possible and then realise, you never needed to believe in it anyway.

Tune in for more.

Becoming a man in today's society has to be the most significant challenge a boy can face. Naturally, we gravitate towards information that will make us likable and accepted by society. However, in today's society men are being feminized and told that being masculine is a toxic trait. This leads to men denying what comes naturally to us.

The truth is, being accepted and liked by many is a false paradigm that will only leave you feeling like you don't know who you are, constantly jumping from one way of life to another. Trust that no man alive today really has all the answers. We are all simply doing our best! Your journey, your downfalls, your struggles, and even death, that is your greatest teacher. Seek the truth but do remember, that it never ends. For me, that led me to Allah - Alhamdullilah.

Tune in for more.

What is the difference between dreaming about something and making it a reality? The more you dream about what isn't here the more you reinforce the fact that it isn't here yet. Whereas if it was your reality, who would you be? What would you think? What would you do? Your current identity may be far from who you need to be to make that dream a reality. This is where the work begins! Tune into this episode to find out how you can do that.

IFS stands for Internal family systems. This modality can help you understand the way your conscious and subconscious mind operates. This has drastically improved my ability to communicate through difficult moments with my partner. If you are familiar with parts work, this is very similar to that but better in my opinion.

Want Trevor to help you understand your internal family system?
👉🏾 IFS Practitioner

Catch Trevor on Instagram,
👉🏾Instagram

Salamualaykum.

We can easily fall into judging and shaming ourselves for being in the same old rut. Till we reach a point where we can’t take it anymore and we force ourselves to make changes. But the problem is, it doesn’t last that long. Maybe a week or even a day, then we find ourselves back where we started.

Forcing yourself to make changes isn’t the solution! Finding out why you end up in the same place again and again is. We unconsciously recreate the past because it is familiar to us. In other words, it is your comfort zone.

The life that you dream of is unfamiliar to you. So unconsciously you will recreate what is familiar to you. Asking yourself this one question, ‘how does this moment serve me?’ Changes the narrative completely. This helps you understand that there is a part of you that perceives what you want as a threat. If you untangle the story of why it is a perceived threat, the changes come effortlessly. This is called shadow work.

Tune into this episode for more.

❤️Salamualaykum.

We can easily get caught up seeking that perfect partner who can also hold space for us in our darkest moments. As important as that may be, no one can save you! I know, hearing that sucks.

Because if you suffer from feeling alone all the time, you will most likely be waiting for that relationship to save you from feeling alone. I was. But I had to learn the hard way that only I can truly save myself. No one and I mean no one. can be there for you the way you can.

Your partner will feel like they have to parent you, which will cause disconnection in the relationship. This also has a huge impact on the way you show up for other people. As you will naturally become more grounded in your light and dark aspects. Tune in to the full episode to learn more.

Salamualaykum.

We can easily get caught up seeking that perfect partner who can also hold space for us in our darkest moments. As important as that may be, no one can save you! I know, hearing that sucks. Because if you suffer from feeling alone all the time, you will most likely be waiting for that relationship to save you from feeling alone.

I was.

But I had to learn the hard way that only I can truly save myself. No one and I mean no one can be there for you the way you can. Your partner will be left feeling like they have to parent you and that will cause disconnection in the relationship.

This also has a huge impact on the way you show up for other people. As you will naturally become more grounded in your light and dark aspects.

Tune in to the full episode to learn more.

Peace & Love.
Salamualaykum.