Every single one of us has stress. We have so much on our plates as we juggle family life, kids, jobs, and the list goes on.  We all do our best to manage and deal and cope, but do we understand stress?  In this podcast, we are going to discuss the stress response to help us better understand it, and by understanding it, we can help manage it.

Stress is caused by the "stressors" in our lives. These are outside sources that we all juggle. Our nervous system then interprets these stressors.  This interpretation is influenced by our past learning, cultures, upbringing, health, and so many other factors and imprints that flavor this interpretation.  This then elicits the "stress response."  When we are all talking about our stress, what we actually mean is our stress response. 

This stress response causes a reaction in our bodies. Sometimes it benefits and helps us, and sometimes it doesn't.  Sometimes the stress response is no big deal, and sometimes we can get to the point where we are stuck in that hyper or hypo active state due to our stress response.

What can we do?! Establish safety.  We are all little boys and girls screaming on the inside for safety.  Follow these 3 steps:

1. Am I safe? Ask yourself this. Remind your brain you are not in physical danger. (If you are in physical danger, RUN! Get to safety!)
2.  Do I feel safe? Most of us don't feel safe. Inside some tension and something is screaming for help. Find that tension.
3. Relax. Relax that part of you that is tense, that is tight, that the stress is sitting in. 

There are many different ways to help us relax and regulate our nervous system to help us manage our stress.

Stress cannot live in a relaxed body! Too often we try to go through our minds and talk ourselves through the stress. Try going through the body!  

We all have stress we are trying to deal with.

We all have imprints and stamps from our life experiences.

These imprints flavor our interpretations of our stressors.

Be kind, we are all doing our best, and are managing the best we know how!

Listen in for more!

Whenever we travel, one of the biggest stressors is getting through the airport.  There are so many security checks and measures.  There are machines, security guards, and dogs all scanning for danger or threats.  

We have an internal scanning system called our Nervous System.  Our nervous system is meant to scan for safety, danger, or life-threatening situations to keep us safe! It scans outside of us, inside of us, and between us to decide if there is something to be concerned about.  Many times our scanning system gets it right! We jump into protection mode and fight, flight, or freeze! However, sometimes, we aren't always in danger but go into the same mode.  

In this case, there are tools to help us unwind those behaviors. But first, we have to be aware of what is going on! In this podcast episode, we discuss more about our nervous system, neuroception, and gain some awareness of some of the behaviors and reactions we may have! 

Listen in!

This week on the podcast we get to hear from my oldest son Dylan on the Power of Relationships.  Dylan and I always had a pretty good relationship, but during his mission our relationship grew and developed. As a missionary Dylan had the opportunity to interact with many different people and companions, and he developed some very valuable skills to improve his ability to connect and have meaningful relationships. Today on the podcast we discuss what he learned, how to apply them, and offer some tips on how to help us in our daily interactions! 

1. Catch a Vision. See who others can become.
2. Treat people as they are, that's what they will be. Treat them as they could be, that's what they will become.
3. Nobody cares how much you know until they know how much you care.
4. Watch your tone.
5. Don't beat yourself up! There is always room for improvement!

Listen in to hear more about the Power of Relationships and ideas to improve yours!

Rulon D. Pope said, "We live in an age and society where hope becomes expectation, and expectation turns quickly into entitlement."

This made me wonder how often some of our hopes may have become expectations.  In our relationships with others, we can hope for things, but when expectations arise and those expectations are not met, we have disappointment, resentment, and pain.  

The truth is, other people can't read our minds, and they don't always do the things we think they will or want them to.  Things might look a little different than we thought, and that's OK.  We can take a step back an see if our hopes for another may have become an expectation, and loosen our grip. We can admit things look different than we thought they would, and everything will be OK.

Listen in to hear more!

What does love look like? Have you ever asked this question? What does it look like for you!? And what would Love look like in every situation? 

These are a few places I saw love this week:

Love is the random sugar cookie on the counter with a note that said: For Mom, love Meg because she knows I love drink shop sugar cookies.

Love is walking away from a discussion or argument and saying, “We need to talk about this later when we’re not upset.”

Love is a random text that says, “Hey! You’re a great mom.”

Think about this as you listen to this episode then ask yourself: "What would love look like right here, right now?"

Original Grace by Adam Miller

The winter months can be long and hard around here, especially for playing baseball.  Our family does a lot of that and practicing baseball can be tricky.  A few facilities are available, and I have found it helpful to hire coaches to do some hitting and fielding sessions with the kids during these months.  

I hired a coach to keep my 14-year-old Austin in shape and work with him on his hitting for the next few months.  One night after Austin’s hitting session he and I were chatting about the session and he asked me if I knew what the fastest muscle in the body is.

Our eyes!

Our eyes are amazing!  They move so quickly scanning for information and sending it to our brains! They also communicate to others so much! We see them, we are listening, we hear them.

What do your eyes communicate? Do they shine and do you help other's eyes shine?

In this week's podcast, we talk about a TED talk given by Benjamin Zander and shining eyes!

Zander's focus is to awaken the possibilities in others and he knows he's doing that when he sees shining eyes.  

Join in this week's podcast as we discuss this topic and some ideas on how we can be the person who helps others shine!

Beautiful Leadership: Shining Eyes

Benjamin Zander TED Talk: The Transformative Power of Classical Music

The Power of the Muscles in Your Eyes

Change Your Game, Change Your Life: How a simple shift in focus will completely transform your relationship to golf—And everything else! By Andrew McKee

Every day our mind is consumed with thoughts and ideas.  If we were to look at our thoughts and rank them in how often we think of something, or what is at the top of our minds, what would those thoughts be?

Home

Family

God

Work

Entertainment

Food

All of these areas of focus are on my mind constantly, but do I put them in the proper order? Is there an area you could say I worship? Tune into today's podcast as we discuss the themes of our thoughts and worship, and how to keep God at the forefront of our minds in our day-to-day!

How to Worship Bruce R. McConkie

Yielding Our Hearts to God Neill F. Marriot

When our kids were little we took them to Build a Bear Workshop to make a stuffed animal that was especially for them. They could pick the bear or animal, the inside qualities we put in them, the stuffing, the accessories, all of it.  They were perfectly tailored to fit each child.  

Wouldn't it be nice if we could do the same about ourselves? Pick every little thing we wanted and get rid of everything we didn't want.  But does all of that matter? We put so much value on the outside things. Our jobs, titles, degrees, number of kids, where we live, what we drive, etc.  We make that mean we are valued and important, but when all of that is stripped away, what's left? The stuff on the inside. That's what is left and what matters.

In today's podcast, we talk about what really matters. We talk about the main identifier in our life that we can focus on to help us in every other area. That we are Beloved Children of God.  That is first and foremost.  We will discuss how Satan works to get us to believe the opposite, and how to work to overcome his influence!

We can pray to know how Heavenly Father feels about us, read the scriptures for answers, and serve others. Use the gifts we possess to bless others and those gifts will be revealed as we continue to do so!

Listen In!

Eyes to See Michelle Craig

Why do we get up and grind every single day? Why do we continue to push and endure the hard? What is the purpose of all of this? What really matters? I have been asking myself a lot of these types of questions, and the answer is Family.  It all comes down to the fundamental unity of society. Family. God created the earth as a place for human families to learn and grow and develop to become like Him.  In this week's podcast, we talk about the family as the deep why behind our day to day. We nurture and provide for the ones we shepherd over and endure great challenges for the ones we love.  Listen in to this week's podcast as we discuss more about the family.  We discuss grace and mercy, how to attain happiness in family life, and I invite you to join me as we discuss what a successful family looks like!

The Heart of the Matter Russell M. Nelson

Grace and Mercy

As the new year begins, we all seem to have great intentions and goals to conquer and accomplish. We look forward with anticipation of what is to come! But have you thought about the benefits of looking back? Sometimes we look back and feel regret and sadness, and that's OK, but if we can look back through the lens of learning, and growth, and remember all the good the bad and the ugly with that in mind, we will be able to propel ourselves into 2024.  We can gain momentum, energy, and motivation to accomplish what it is that we desire! As you look back, pay attention to the big things and the little things that will help you. Give yourself credit for the goodness, the learning, the growth, and launch into 2024 with excitement and energy!

At the beginning of this year, I introduced my word for the year: Intention. In this podcast episode, I talk about a few things I have learned during my year of intention! First, intention requires some attention! I picked my word, I was really intentional, but then sort of forgot about that word! If I want to have intention it does require some attention and some work to create! This brings to lesson number two: When we give intention some attention, we create what we want. When we focus on our desires, Heavenly Father and the universe provide opportunities for us to create what we want! And lesson number three: Intention helps develop resilience. We are much better about bouncing back from setbacks if we have been intentional!

Listen in to today's podcast to hear more about Intention! 

President Russell M. Nelson Heart of the Matter

Victor Frankl Man's Search for Meaning

Change is happening right as we speak. It is just part of this life, part of our every day, but that doesn't mean we always enjoy it! There are a few things we can plan on with change.

1. It is part of life.  It happens. Every single day. It is part of God's great plan of happiness.
2. There is growth with change.
3. BELIEVE in the growth with change and you will see just that! GROWTH!

Listen in to today's podcast as we discuss change, we talk about how to embrace change even when it's hard, and how to keep moving forward through the change!

I also read you our family's Christmas Card!

Merry Christmas!

Christmas is the time of year when you can find lights everywhere.  On our homes, our trees, windows, garlands, and more! The lights illuminate the dark and dreary days of winter, add cheer and warmth to our homes, and remind us of the true source of light, Jesus Christ.  In this podcast episode, we talk about how each one of us carries light.  We have the light within us! Some days our lights shine bright and some days our lights can be dimmer, but we all have the light.  We also are drawn to light! This is called the Heliotropic Effect! The tendency for all living systems to move towards light and away from darkness.  We are creatures of light and are drawn to it based on our very natures! And lastly, we radiate light! Our lights not only light our own paths but the paths of others too! There are times we need the light of others for us to rely on and then there are times when we are that light others need! Let your light shine!

Thomas S. Monson Be a Light to the World

The holidays are a time of celebration, relationships, and gathering, but what about when you are missing the presence of a loved one? Many circumstances can prevent us from getting together with the people we love during the holidays: death, military, serving missions, traveling, finances,  scheduling, and the list goes on. With intention, a little planning, and some thought, you can still enjoy the holiday and make it memorable and special! 

In this week's podcast Maria Strange and I talk about the many ways we can make the holidays special even without the presence of a loved one.  Maria has first-hand experience with her husband's military service. She has some great ideas and suggestions including naming recipes after loved ones, creating a video potluck, gratitude, service, and so much more! Join us this week for some great ideas to make your holidays memorable!

Many things in our day-to-day lives are super easy to do, and therefore we put them off and convince ourselves we can do them later. If they are easy to do, then that means they are easy to not do.  No one will even notice, right? No one will care? It's no big deal.  We can tend to do this with cooking, cleaning, and laundry, but also with our relationships, with promptings and impressions.  Is it us or is it the adversary? Who knows? But the bigger question is, does it matter? 

If there is an opportunity to dim and diminish light and goodness, Satan will, and he will work to keep us confused, spinning, and stuck so we don’t do the things. Often we will think it’s just us being lazy or unmotivated, We will get frustrated and mad when the truth is, that we are experiencing opposition.  

The great challenge in life is to overcome and get out of our way. To do the little things that are easy to do, like stretching after a run,  so we can do good, serve and lift others, and come closer to God and his children.

Listen to today's podcast as we discuss overcoming our tendencies to not do those easy things!

Relationships can be tricky. They can have highs and lows and ebb and flow.  Sometimes we can be full of love and then other times we can feel pretty frustrated, disconnected, and conflicted with our relationships.  One of the ways we can strengthen them is with Gratitude! Gratitude can be just the thing to help us improve our relationships. In this podcast we will discuss how this happens! First, it shows that we care. That we see and notice the other person. Second, it brings attention to the positive.  It is very easy to stay focused on the negative but gratitude helps us shift that thinking. Third, it can help mend the strained relationships and help us move forward with forgiveness, compassion, and love, and lastly, it helps us feel better! Gratitude is not just for the benefit of the other individual, but it benefits us as well! Listen in to hear all about this and more!

We’ve all probably been to the doctor to get some help with a sickness, illness, injury, or ailment, and he has written us a prescription. Some form of medication or treatment to help us feel better.

Did you know gratitude can do the same!? 

President Russell M. Nelson said:

Over my nine and a half decades of life, I have concluded that counting our blessings is far better than recounting our problems. No matter our situation, showing gratitude for our privileges is a fast-acting and long-lasting spiritual prescription. Does gratitude spare us from sorrow, sadness, grief, and pain? No, but it does soothe our feelings. It provides us with a greater perspective on the very purpose and joy of life.

It is such an easy fix, but easy to forget too! Listen in to today's podcast to get some ideas on practicing gratitude!!! 

I'm a succor for all of the Halloween goodies and sweets! Actually, I'm a succor for any sweets! The day after Halloween can be rough sometimes. Not just because of a late night, but also because of the amount of excess sugar we may have eaten.  Many teachers I talked to in the schools called this the "Halloween Hangover." This leads to tired and grumpy kids and teachers, or absent kids and teachers! What is this "Halloween Hangover?" Well, it is simply the aftereffects of too much sugar in our systems! Listen to today's podcast to hear what happens to our bodies, how they cope and manage the excessive amount of sugar, and what we can do to help ourselves out! 

Article: Halloween Sugar Hangover Can Make You Feel Sick

Our vision, the way we perceive the world and how it operates, has been influenced by everything! It is influenced by our genetics, our upbringing and childhood experiences, our day-to-day experiences, all of it. Our brains and bodies are always scanning and taking in everything! I think of it like Superman with his x-ray vision.  We are always scanning, learning, interpreting, and taking in information.

When we are young, our brains are very moldable, or neuroplastic,  As we age, our brains are less moldable, however, they are still able to be, it just takes a little more work and effort.  When we are young and our brains are more moldable, we develop many beliefs and perceptions.

As we have experiences our brains make connections and judgements and beliefs that create our vision of the world around us. Then we carry those perceptions of the world around us throughout our adulthood. 

The truth is, we all have skewed vision. Every single one of us has developed beliefs, perceptions, and the way we see the world. We see colors and our colors are all very different. Sometimes we'll have an experience where our perception is changed, and our colors change!

Listen in as we talk about this and give ourselves and others grace as we continue to have our colors and "view" shift!

Glasses for Jaron Article

Seeing Green Article

Seeing Green Video

With Halloween coming up the big question is what are you going to be?! What are you going to dress up as!? Ghosts, goblins, witches, and wizards, so many options! Every costume has accessories. For some costumes we will have wigs, some will need face paint, and some have Magic Wands.

Which costumes need magic wands?

Witches and fairies were the first 2 that came to my mind.

Wizards, sorcerers, and many types of characters have a magic wand as part of their attire and their identity.

These magic wands, what do they do? What are they used for?

Sometimes to cast spells, good or bad. Sometimes to get a specific result, and sometimes to solve problems!

Wouldn’t it be nice if we had a magic wand to help us in our day-to-day? To do the dishes, to do the laundry, to cook the meals.  The solutions to our messy problems would be easily solved and then we could get what we want. 

I love to use this idea of having a magic wand and pretending with my clients and myself sometimes.

I will ask “What if we had a magic wand and we could use it to get exactly what we want, what would that look like?”

What does this do?

I identified 3 things this helps us do:

1. Get clear on our wants.

2. Get clear on our expectations.

3.  Identify the steps we need to take to get what it is we want.

Listen in to hear more about the Magic Wand!