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    Parenting Teens Through The Hard - From Unyielding

    Parenting teens can be hard. Parenting teens who are in crisis is even more complicated. You were never meant to walk through this alone. Welcome to Through the Hard - Parenting Teens in Crisis, a twice-monthly podcast presented by Pathways to Hope Network. Join us for honest conversations that drive out shame and show us how to navigate the emotions and uncertainty of parenting teens through crisis.
    en59 Episodes

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    Episodes (59)

    When Life Doesn't Follow the Path We Planned

    When Life Doesn't Follow the Path We Planned

    As I navigate through a deeply personal and challenging time, today's episode signifies a monumental shift in my life, one that I know will leave a lasting impact. In the midst of this, I've made the decision to take a break from recording to focus on being present with my family. While I'm away, I'll be hand-picking some of my most cherished past episodes to share with you in the hope that they bring you comfort and inspiration during this time. Thank you for your patience and understanding.

    Am I on the Right Parenting Path with my Teen?

    Am I on the Right Parenting Path with my Teen?

    Have you ever found yourself trying to do all the right things with your child, pouring all your love and so, so much energy into parenting, only to start to question if you are even on the right path? Sometimes, even our best intentions can steer us off course.

    In this episode, we cover:

    • An audiobook revelation that challenged my perspective on parenting.
    • The comparison trap we often fall into as parents.
    • Reevaluation of societal norms
    • Parental pressure and guilt
    • Three things to think about if you are struggling with your teen


    Click here if you are interested in receiving information about the opportunity to join an online support group with other moms who "get it".

    👉If the link doesn't work (technology 🙄), you can also find my email listed below.

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    About Through The Hard:

    "Through The Hard," originally titled Unyielding, is presented by Pathways to Hope Network—a parent-led non-profit organization committed to providing free support and nurturing a sense of community for parents navigating the challenges of teens in crisis.

    Explore Additional Support:

    Connect with Us:

    Reframing Your Parental Fears to Serve You

    Reframing Your Parental Fears to Serve You

    Are you exhausted, barely keeping your head above water, wondering if the next wave of fear will be the wave that finally takes you out? Well, friend, reframing is one powerful way you can start to protect your peace. 

    In this episode, we cover:

    • How discomfort is a part of every decision we make as parents.
    • How trying a new parenting approach involves confronting pain and discomfort, questioning ourselves, and pushing through doubt.
    • How each fear we experience presents an opportunity to overcome challenges, build resilience, and deepen self-understanding.
    • Our tendency to join the "crazy train" of fear-driven thoughts and actions.
    • All the different roles we play as a parent and the ONE we don't.
    • A fear mapping process I use to help me reframe my perspective and navigate challenges when I'm stuck in fear.


    Click here to have my Fear Mapping PDF sent to your email inbox.
    👉Remember, it will take a few minutes to hit your inbox (check your spam folder if you don't see it).


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    About Through The Hard:

    "Through The Hard," originally titled Unyielding, is proudly presented by Pathways to Hope Network—a parent-led non-profit organization committed to providing free support and nurturing a sense of community for parents navigating the challenges of teens in crisis.

    Explore Additional Support:

    Connect with Us:

    Breaking the Cycle: Parenting Teens with Love in the Face of Fear

    Breaking the Cycle: Parenting Teens with Love in the Face of Fear

    In today's episode, we are going to take a look at some common fear triggers. How many of them resonate with you? We'll discuss the vicious cycle of fear, and what I've learned about the role of mirror neurons in my relationship with my teen. I'll also share some ways that I've been trying to break the cycle of fear in my own life & improve communication with my teens and adult children.
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    About Through The Hard:

    "Through The Hard," originally titled Unyielding, is proudly presented by Pathways to Hope Network—a parent-led non-profit organization committed to providing free support and nurturing a sense of community for parents navigating the challenges of teens in crisis.

    Explore Additional Support:

    Connect with Us:

    Nurturing the Nurturer: Reclaiming Yourself Amidst the Challenge of Parenting Your Teen

    Nurturing the Nurturer: Reclaiming Yourself Amidst the Challenge of Parenting Your Teen

    As we step into a new year, there's NO BETTER TIME to kickstart healthy habits and cultivate self-compassion. 

    In this special rerun of Episode 32, we revisit an insightful discussion with Megan Dahlman, a Certified Trainer, Nutrition Coach, and mom of boys. Megan shares invaluable insights for moms navigating challenging seasons of chaos and uncertainty, emphasizing the crucial first steps on their self-compassion journey.

    Key Takeaways:

    1. Initiating Self-Care: Megan guides us through the initial steps moms can take to prioritize self-care amid chaotic circumstances.
    2. Unexpected Benefits: Discover the unforeseen positive outcomes that emerge when you invest energy in your healing journey.
    3. The Mind-Body Connection: Explore the significant role your body plays in influencing your mental health and overall well-being.


    Links from the Original Episode:


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    About Through The Hard:

    "Through The Hard" is proudly presented by Pathways to Hope Network—an empathetic non-profit organization committed to providing free support and nurturing a sense of community for parents navigating the challenges of teens in crisis.

    Explore Additional Support:

    Connect with Us:

    Closing the Chapter: My Favorite Moments on Parenting Teens Through the Hard

    Closing the Chapter: My Favorite Moments on Parenting Teens Through the Hard

    Welcome to the final episode of 2023, where we take a reflective journey through some of my favorite clips of Through the Hard and Unyielding.

    Join us as we revisit the memorable moments and lessons learned.....
    Segment 1: Episode 10 Moving Through the Unknown with Purpose
    Segment 2: Episode 27 Embracing Imperfection: Why You Need to Let Go of the Need to Fix Your Teen
    Segment 3: Episode 12 What No One Tells You About Youth Probation
    Segment 4: Episode 37 React Less, Respond More: Parenting Tips for Mindful Communication
    Segment 5: Episode 35 The Role of Self-Reflection in the Healing Process
    Segment 6: Episode 13 When the Challenge Changes You - Blake's Story
    Segment 7: Episode 41 The Learning Curve: Stage 2 of Learning to Parent a Teen in Crisis
    Segment 8: Episode 38 Connection vs. Control: Finding the Right Balance in Your Parenting Approach

    As we close this chapter, I'd like to extend my sincerest thanks for allowing me to be a small part of your parenting journey. May the coming year bring joy, discovery, and shared wisdom.

    Thank you for being a part of our podcast community. Wishing you hope and healing in the year ahead!

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    About Through The Hard:

    "Through The Hard" ,originally titled Unyielding, is proudly presented by Pathways to Hope Network—an empathetic non-profit organization committed to providing free support and nurturing a sense of community for parents navigating the challenges of teens in crisis.

    Explore Additional Support:

    Connect with Us:

    How to find Strength and Resilience as You Parent Your Teen

    How to find Strength and Resilience as You Parent Your Teen

    In this episode of Through the Hard, we dive into the topic of control and over-functioning in parenting. It's something many of us struggle with, and it can have negative effects on our teens. I often find myself in that same place, trying to control every aspect of my teen's life, thinking it is the best way to protect them. But I'm learning that it's so important to find a balance. Our teens need some freedom to make their own choices and learn from their mistakes.


    That's where the concept of balanced oversight comes in. Finding that sweet spot between being too controlling and not being involved enough. Providing guidance and support without taking over their lives. Listen as we discuss seven practical tips to help you practice finding a balance between control and your own freedom. It won't happen overnight, but patience and practice can create a healthier dynamic with your teen.


    Resources mentioned in the podcast:


    Register for the 4 Principles for Fighting Fear workshop HERE

    Article by Dr. Amy Johnson: Don't Make it Happen, Allow it to Happen


    ___________________________________________________________________________
    About Through The Hard:
    "Through The Hard" is proudly presented by Pathways to Hope Network—an empathetic non-profit organization committed to providing free support and nurturing a sense of community for parents navigating the challenges of teens in crisis.

    Explore Additional Support:

    Connect with Us:

    Balanced Oversight: Navigating Parental Control and Teen Independence

    Balanced Oversight: Navigating Parental Control and Teen Independence

    In this episode of Through the Hard, we dive into the topic of control and over-functioning in parenting. It's something many of us struggle with, and it can have negative effects on our teens. I often find myself in that same place, trying to control every aspect of my teen's life, thinking it is the best way to protect them. But I'm learning that it's so important to find a balance. Our teens need some freedom to make their own choices and learn from their mistakes.


    That's where the concept of balanced oversight comes in. Finding that sweet spot between being too controlling and not being involved enough. Providing guidance and support without taking over their lives. Listen as we discuss seven practical tips to help you practice finding a balance between control and your own freedom. It won't happen overnight, but patience and practice can create a healthier dynamic with your teen.


    Resources mentioned in the podcast:


    Register for the 4 Principles for Fighting Fear workshop HERE

    Article by Dr. Amy Johnson: Don't Make it Happen, Allow it to Happen


    ___________________________________________________________________________
    About Through The Hard:
    "Through The Hard" is proudly presented by Pathways to Hope Network—an empathetic non-profit organization committed to providing free support and nurturing a sense of community for parents navigating the challenges of teens in crisis.

    Explore Additional Support:

    Connect with Us:

    Seasons of Strength: A Journey Through Holiday Challenges

    Seasons of Strength: A Journey Through Holiday Challenges

    Today's Parenting Teens Through the Hard episode is a heartfelt throwback from last year.

    We're diving into the challenges we all face during the holiday season while caring for a teen in crisis. Your experiences and emotions are valid, and we're here to explore them with compassion and understanding. Join us as we discuss the many conflicting emotions we experience and offer a few suggestions on how to approach setting boundaries, avoiding problematic gifts, planning how to handle difficult conversations, and creating new traditions to bring joy. Despite the hardships we are experiencing, this holiday season is still an opportunity to find moments of peace, reflect on what's important, and remember that your efforts in being there for your child are remarkable and truly make a difference.

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    About Through The Hard:
    "Through The Hard" is proudly presented by Pathways to Hope Network—an empathetic non-profit organization committed to providing free support and nurturing a sense of community for parents navigating the challenges of teens in crisis.

    Explore Additional Support:

    Connect with Us:

    Courage to Connect: How Vulnerability Strengthens Parent-Teen Relationships

    Courage to Connect: How Vulnerability Strengthens Parent-Teen Relationships

    Friend, today, we're going to delve into a topic that might tug at the heartstrings a bit – the profound importance of vulnerability in parenting, particularly during these challenging teenage years.

    Together, we'll dive a little deeper into this concept I like to call "heart talk." A gentle, intimate dialogue rooted in trust and authenticity, a space where we can really connect with our teens. Because, you see, parenting during these years can be quite a tender journey.

    You and I are going to explore those areas where our teens find it tough to open up to us. It's a reminder for us, as parents, to acknowledge our own imperfections, set expectations that are filled with compassion, and, most importantly, honor the boundaries our teens set.

    Our teens are navigating a maze of changes and challenges, and we have the opportunity to be a comforting presence – a lighthouse guiding them through the waves. It's a call for us to understand that vulnerability isn't a weakness; it's a strength that fosters profound connections.

    Let's embrace the reality that parenting teenagers is no easy feat. Through the mist of discomfort, we are learning to be there for our teens with open hearts and arms.

    So, mama, let's gently step into the realm of vulnerability. Let's open up those channels of communication, even if it feels heavy. Because in those quiet, somber conversations lies the potential for healing and understanding.
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    About Through The Hard:
    "Through The Hard" is proudly presented by Pathways to Hope Network—an empathetic non-profit organization committed to providing free support and nurturing a sense of community for parents navigating the challenges of teens in crisis.

    Explore Additional Support:

    Connect with Us:

    Heart Talk: Parent-Teen Conversations that Count

    Heart Talk: Parent-Teen Conversations that Count

    In episode 48, we're diving into a topic that's pretty important on this parenting journey through the hard: talking openly and genuinely with our teenagers.


    You know, as parents, it's crucial to get a handle on our own emotions and fears before we embark on those deep heart-to-heart chats. Think of it like learning a new dance – it takes time, understanding, and a solid connection.


    In this episode, I've got some down-to-earth strategies to share to help you get closer to having deeper conversations with your teens. We're also gonna chat about the whole influence-versus-control deal – trust me, it's a game-changer.


    And because some of us may need a little more help, I've got a cool resource for you. Listen to find out how you can snag a free PDF loaded with journal prompts designed to get you ready for those heart-to-heart talks. Plus, stay tuned for an upcoming workshop where we'll tackle those fears head-on while learning from each other's stories and experiences.


    ⚡Sign up for our FREE Workshop 4 Principles for Fighting Fear on November 9th here!


    đź’™ For your free Heart Talk Prompts, email me at afrey.pathways@gmail.com


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    About Through The Hard:

    "Through The Hard" is proudly presented by Pathways to Hope Network—an empathetic non-profit organization committed to providing free support and nurturing a sense of community for parents navigating the challenges of teens in crisis.

    Explore Additional Support:

    Connect with Us:

    Parenting Unmasked: Breaking Free from the Chains of Fear

    Parenting Unmasked: Breaking Free from the Chains of Fear

    In Episode 47, I give you an inside glimpse of the content for Day 1 of our recent workshop on The Four Principles for Fighting Fear, specifically in the context of parenting teenagers. As a parent, I understand how fear can sometimes hinder our ability to parent our teens effectively. That's why I want to share a personal "cheat code" for managing fear and becoming a more confident parent.

    You see, parental fear is often rooted in love. We want the best for our teenagers, and we worry about their well-being. But sometimes, this fear can hold us back from making the right decisions or giving our teens the freedom they need to grow.

    Learn to identify and understand your own fear triggers - the situations or thoughts that make you feel the most fearful as a parent. By recognizing these triggers, we can start to address them head-on.

    Join me as we explore ways to fight fear and become more effective parents to our teenagers. Together, we can create a nurturing and supportive environment while giving us the peace of mind we deserve.

    ⚡Sign up for Day 2 of our FREE Workshop 4 Principles for Fighting Fear on November 9th here!
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    About Through The Hard:
    "Through The Hard" is proudly presented by Pathways to Hope Network—an empathetic non-profit organization committed to providing free support and nurturing a sense of community for parents navigating the challenges of teens in crisis.

    Explore Additional Support:

    Connect with Us:

    Connecting Through Conversation: Navigating the Shifting Landscape of Parent-Teen Communication

    Connecting Through Conversation: Navigating the Shifting Landscape of Parent-Teen Communication

    In this episode of our podcast "Parenting Teens Through the Hard," we are talking about the importance of understanding the changing dynamics of communication with our teens and how crucial it is for us to adapt.

    We all know that our teens are heavily influenced by their peers, technology, and social media. However, it's essential for us to remember that our voices still hold immense value in their lives. We need to find ways to connect and communicate effectively with them.

    A key aspect we focus on is modeling healthy communication and empathy. Empathy acts as the anchor line that connects us in our communication with our teens. By understanding their perspective and showing empathy, we can build a stronger bond with them.

    Today's teens face numerous challenges and pressures, and it's our responsibility as parents to provide understanding and empathy. We need to create an environment where they feel safe to open up and share their thoughts and feelings.

    Building trust and open communication is vital.  So, let's embark on this journey together, exploring the world of communication with our teens. By adapting to the changing dynamics, understanding the generation gap, and practicing empathy, we can strengthen our relationships and guide our teens through the hard times.

    Register for the 4 Principles for Fighting Fear workshop HERE


    ___________________________________________________________________________


    About Through The Hard:

    "Through The Hard" is proudly presented by Pathways to Hope Network—an empathetic non-profit organization committed to providing free support and nurturing a sense of community for parents navigating the challenges of teens in crisis.

    Explore Additional Support:

    Connect with Us:

    Time to Get the "F" Out: The Journey from Hurt Parent to Healed Parent

    Time to Get the "F" Out: The Journey from Hurt Parent to Healed Parent

    "What will you pursue in the middle of this mess that might somehow justify all your suffering?"


    In this episode, we are opening our eyes to one of the biggest struggles we experience as parents of teenagers or young adults in crisis. Whether we are dealing with teen behavior issues, addiction, failing grades in high school, manipulation, or isolation, there is a heaviness that creeps in around us with no intention of leaving anytime soon. 


    Join us as we discuss how we go from hurt parents to healed parents and learn about a unique opportunity coming to you in October 2023!

    Timestamps:
    The challenges of parenting teens in crisis [00:00:02]
    Discussion on the difficulties parents face when their teens are in crisis and the importance of a supportive community.

    The role of fear in parenting [00:01:26]
    Exploration of how fear can dictate our actions as parents and lead to constant stress and anxiety.

    The pressure to fix everything and fear of failure [00:02:53]
    Discussion on the pressure parents feel to find solutions to their child's problems and the fear of failure that comes with it.

    The need for a supportive community [00:15:20]
    Emphasizes the importance of having a supportive community to help navigate challenges and overcome fear in parenting.

    The upcoming four-week online workshop [00:17:02]
    Introducing an upcoming workshop focused on four foundation principles to help parents operate from a place of calm and healing.

    Shifting away from control and finding purpose in suffering [00:19:33]
    Encouraging listeners to shift their mindset away from control and view their experiences as opportunities for growth and purpose in their lives and the lives of their children.

    Register for the 4 Principles for Fighting Fear workshop HERE


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    About Through The Hard:

    "Through The Hard" is proudly presented by Pathways to Hope Network—an empathetic non-profit organization committed to providing free support and nurturing a sense of community for parents navigating the challenges of teens in crisis.

    Explore Additional Support:

    Connect with Us:

    From Seed to Harvest: Finding Peace in The Process of Parenting Teens

    From Seed to Harvest: Finding Peace in The Process of Parenting Teens

    Hey Sis! Ever think about parenting teens like you're tending a garden? Well, that's what we're getting into in this episode – 'cause, let's face it, our kids are a bit like flowers. They bloom when they're ready, in their own sweet time.

    We're just here to play the gardener, you know? Nurturing, observing, and maybe doing a bit of waiting.

    This summer, as I strolled around my yard, checking out how each plant was doing, it hit me how much parenting teens can feel like tending a garden. And guess what? I had to spill the beans (or should I say seeds?) with you.

    Come hang out with us as we chat about:

    • Your child’s zone: Respecting their own growth timeline.
    • Starting at ground level: Embracing those foundational moments.
    • How to soften the seed: Creating the right conditions for growth.
    • The DANGERS of overwatering: Yep, finding that sweet balance.
    • Getting to the roots: Digging into what really matters for your teens.

    I'm keeping it laid-back and sharing insights to help you navigate the ups and downs of parenting teens. So, grab your favorite beverage, kick back, and let's chat about growing up together, one seed at a time.

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    About Through The Hard:

    "Through The Hard" is proudly presented by Pathways to Hope Network—an empathetic non-profit organization committed to providing free support and nurturing a sense of community for parents navigating the challenges of teens in crisis.

    Explore Additional Support:

    Connect with Us:

    The Learning Curve: Final Stage of Learning to Parent a Teen in Crisis

    The Learning Curve: Final Stage of Learning to Parent a Teen in Crisis

    "As we heal the parts of us that, even in the midst of chaos, need to grieve over the loss of the family we dreamed would be ours, we get better at parenting. We learn to be ok with holding the reins a little looser because holding them tight never seems to bring our child closer.  And through this beautiful process of losing and finding, we stumble upon our sweet spot."


    In today’s episode, we discuss the 4th and final stage of learning.  At this stage, our skills are developing and becoming ingrained in us through repetition. They begin to line up with what feels right to us. Our actions and reactions, even if they don’t always yield the results we hope for, are more incongruent with what’s important to us, and it starts to feel more natural and effortless.

    Join us to learn more about….

    • Stage 4: Unconscious Competence.
    • Parenting and Shepherding - what they have in common.
    • The growth required of us.

    Links from today's show:


    Dr. Russell Barkley: 30 Essential Ideas Every Parent Needs to Know (Parents of ADHD Children)

    Skills of a Shepherd by Kim Gooding


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    About Through The Hard:

    "Through The Hard" is proudly presented by Pathways to Hope Network—an empathetic non-profit organization committed to providing free support and nurturing a sense of community for parents navigating the challenges of teens in crisis.

    Explore Additional Support:

    Connect with Us:

    The Learning Curve: Stage 3 of Learning to Parent a Teen in Crisis

    The Learning Curve: Stage 3 of Learning to Parent a Teen in Crisis

    “Parenting is not your purpose. It’s preparing you for your purpose.”


    We often make the learning process more complicated than necessary because of the negative feelings we experience when as parents, we make mistakes.  Ironically, not doing it right and making mistakes are actually vital steps in the learning process.

    In today’s episode, we are moving on to explore conscious competence parenting, which is stage 3 of any learning process.


    Join us to learn more about….

    • Stage 3: Conscious Competence.
    • How to tell when you’ve reached stage 3.
    • Two benefits you’ll experience.
    • A few tips on what to practice at this level.


    Links from today's show:

    Gary Thomas’ book Sacred Parenting: How Raising Children Shapes Our Souls

    Dr. Becky Bailey

    Dr. Becky Bailey YouTube


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    About Through The Hard:
    "Through The Hard" is proudly presented by Pathways to Hope Network—an empathetic non-profit organization committed to providing free support and nurturing a sense of community for parents navigating the challenges of teens in crisis.

    Explore Additional Support:

    Connect with Us:

    The Learning Curve: Stage 2 of Learning to Parent a Teen in Crisis

    The Learning Curve: Stage 2 of Learning to Parent a Teen in Crisis

    Show-notes Episode 41

    Title: The Learning Curve: Stage 2 of Learning to Parent a Teen in Crisis


    “Awareness is the first step in healing.”
    Dean Ornish

    Today’s episode is another bite sized episode, perfect for a quick walk around the neighborhood. The second of our mini series on the four stages we go through as we learn to parent a teen in crisis. These stages take us through the learning curve we face as we develop the skills needed in order to feel more confident in our parenting abilities.


    In this episode, we explore conscious incompetence parenting, which is stage 2 of the learning process and I’ll give you a few tips on how to become more effective during this stage of parenting.


    Join us to learn more about….

    • Stage 2: Conscious Incompetence
    • How to tell when you’ve reached stage 2
    • The beautiful element added to our journey once we reach this stage
    • Tips to help you move through this stage effectively and more

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    About Through The Hard:
    "Through The Hard" is proudly presented by Pathways to Hope Network—an empathetic non-profit organization committed to providing free support and nurturing a sense of community for parents navigating the challenges of teens in crisis.

    Explore Additional Support:

    Connect with Us:


    The Learning Curve: Stage 1 of Learning to Parent a Teen in Crisis

    The Learning Curve: Stage 1 of Learning to Parent a Teen in Crisis

    “Do the best you can until you know better. Then, when you know better, do better.”

    Hey….You made it! I wondered if you would find the time this week, friend. I know that right now, you are juggling all the things, and finding a little time to shut off the chatter in your brain is challenging.


    Today’s episode is bite-sized. Just about 20 mins from beginning to end to kick off a little mini-series we are doing on the four stages we go through as we learn to parent a teen in crisis. These stages take us through the learning curve we face as we develop the skills needed in order to feel more confident in our parenting abilities.


    Join us to learn more about….

    • Stage 1: Unconscious Incompetence
    • The common feelings we experience
    • The challenges we face.
    • Helpful tips to get through stage 1 and more...


    Below are links from todays show:

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    About Through The Hard:
    "Through The Hard" is proudly presented by Pathways to Hope Network—an empathetic non-profit organization committed to providing free support and nurturing a sense of community for parents navigating the challenges of teens in crisis.

    Explore Additional Support:

    Connect with Us:

    ParenTEENg Decisions: The #1 Factor That Should Be Guiding Them

    ParenTEENg Decisions: The #1 Factor That Should Be Guiding Them

    “Everyone we meet is both our student and our teacher.”


    Today’s episode is a countdown of the four factors that guide our parenting decisions.  Together we talk about the benefits & challenges that we experience with each one of these factors.


    Join us to learn more about….

    • Family dynamics in parenting.
    • Peer Influence
    • The Benefits of Book and Media
    • On-the-job training and more.

    In this podcast episode, we discuss the anxieties and insecurities we face in our parenting journey and introduce the primary factors that should guide parenting decisions and three other influential factors. We emphasize the importance of learning from our own parents, observing others, and seeking support during challenging times & also highlight the significance of on-the-job training in parenting as a continuous learning process. 

    Parenting Books and Resources:

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    About Through The Hard:
    "Through The Hard" is proudly presented by Pathways to Hope Network—an empathetic non-profit organization committed to providing free support and nurturing a sense of community for parents navigating the challenges of teens in crisis.

    Explore Additional Support:

    Connect with Us: