The Film Snarks: The Snark Is Reel!

"Dream girls can be a nightmare!"

Welcome back to another coming of age, bloody-heavy ritualistic, and comedically horror episode of THE FILM SNARKS!!!

And Happy New Year to all of our fellow snarks and loyal listeners!!

With 2021 officially in the books, and the new year now upon us, we are super excited to kick off 2022 with my brother Andrew’s birthday this week!

And because it’s my brother’s birthday, it seemed only fair that he get to pick the first movie of the new year. And because he's such a fan of the horror genre, he chose wisely with the teen  comedy Netflix Original horror film, The Babysitter!!

There's so many great babysitter-themed films out there. But this one ain't no Mrs. Doubtfire or Mary Poppins ya'll!!

So join us as we ring in 2022 and find out if Netflix's The Babysitter is just another cliched horror comedy, or if it's a surprisingly great horror  comedy that cleverly and smartly subverts expectations and stands on its own two feet!!

"You never told me your Intergalactic Dream Team..."

“The best way to spread Christmas cheer is singing loud for all to hear.”

Seasons Greetings and welcome back to another family-friendly, light-hearted, and whimsical Holiday festive special episode of THE FILM SNARKS!!!

Well SON OF A NUTCRACKER! Christmas has come and gone once more! So we figured why not hang on to the Christmas spirit a little longer before the new year with perhaps the holiday film with the greatest Christmas spirit ever with the 2003 modern holiday classic, ELF!!!

There's only a few days left in 2021, so join us as we find out  if Elf is an overly whimsical and over-cherished Christmas film that should be on Santa’s Naughty List, or if it deserves to be regarded as a Christmas staple year after year because it’s so light-hearted and childlike!

“There’s room for everyone on the Nice List!”

"Welcome to the Real World.”

Welcome back to another mind-bending, gravity-defying, artificial reality, and bullet-timing episode of THE FILMS SNARKS!!!

Do you ever have that feeling where you’re not sure if you’re awake or dreaming?

We sure do!

That’s why we need you to make a choice…

If you take the blue pill, this podcast ends, you wake up in your beds and believe whatever you want to believe.

But, if you take the red pill, you stay in Wonderland and we show you how deep the  rabbit-hole goes…

That’s right, we’re uploading ourselves back into  The Matrix in celebration The Matrix Resurrections, to find out if  it’s a dated late-90s sci-fi flick, too smart for its own good, that’s been parodied one too many times to be taken seriously now, or if it’s still a groundbreaking pulsating sci-fi action movie-going experience with both style and substance that deserves to maintain its place as a major game changer in Hollywood!

“There is no spoon.”

“If that spell gets loose, they’re all coming here!”

Welcome back to another time crashing, world-colliding, and super-heroic universe altering episode of THE FILM SNARKS!!!

The wait is finally over, and the big Holiday Christmas movie event of 2021 and the third chapter in the MCU Spider-Man franchise is upon us with Spider-Man: No Way Home, which has seen Avengers: Endgame-level hype surrounding the marketing leading up to the release this past weekend!

And boy does it certainly NOT disappoint! This should go without saying that MASSIVE SPOILERS will follow. So if you haven't seen Spider-Man: No Way Home yet, this is your fair warning.

So join us we find out if Spider-Man: No Way Home is an overstuffed and overambitious comic book film that tries to do too much in the name of fan service and nostalgia.

Or if it fully delivers on everything promised in the marketing by giving fans a well done universe colliding juxtaposition of past series that does all of them proper justice!!

"Let’s catch some multiverse men."

"I made my family disappear!"

Welcome back to another holiday-crazy, home-invading, and heavily booby-trapped episode of THE FILM SNARKS!!

Well, it’s Christmas time, the season of perpetual hope! And that means mad dash stressful travels, holiday office parties, inundation of Christmas music.

But in the case of 8 year old, Kevin McCallister, a giant house ALL to yourself, a lovely cheese pizza, burning aftershave, a blow torch and a house completely free of all adults, siblings, and cousins, is a Christmas dream come true!!

Which is why a little Christmas-centered family film from the early 90’s, after more than 30 years, continues to delight and entertain every holiday season,

None other than Home Alone!!

So join us as we find out if Home Alone is an overplayed and over cherished holiday regular that teaches child abandonment as a cool thing to do, or if it's still a beloved Christmas family classic that deserves to stay in every household’s yearly festive rotation for decades more to come!

"Merry Christmas, ya filthy animals!"

"Did I tell you how my wife pretended to blip out?"

Welcome back to another school-trippin’, globe-trotting, illusion-heavy episode of THE FILM SNARKS!!!

In continuing on with our Marvel Cinematic Universe Spider-Man films in preparation for the upcoming third film in the trilogy, Spider-Man: No Way Home, which began in November with Spider-Man: Homecoming, and continues this week with its sequel, Spider-Man: Far From Home, the 23rd film in the MCU following the events of Avengers: Endgame acting as the conclusion of Phase Three of the MCU.

The end of a truly epic cinematic game-changing era!!

But before we get to No Way Home, join us as we have a look back at Spider-Man: Far From Home to see if it was just another standard entry in the MCU with too much theatricality and deception, or if it's a well-executed and fun road trip / con man film that stands as the perfect bridge between the end of the Infinity Saga and what’s to come for the MCU in the future!!

"Spider-Man's name is Peter Parker!"

"You've probably wondered where holidays come from, if you haven't I'd say it's time you've begun."

So Welcome back to another holiday-debating, undead ghoulish dark fantasy, and musically fantastic episode of THE FILM SNARKS!!!

Whether you love the season or detest it, Christmas is a time for donning festive garb, singing holiday songs, decorating your home in knick knacks, and of course, giving thoughtful gifts.

But when it comes to the inhabitants of Halloween Town, all that festive joy and cheer turns out a bit more twisted and fun!!

So what better way to kick off our holiday celebration with the ghoulishly entertaining animated classic and ode to the holidays,  Tim Burton’s The Nightmare Before Christmas!

Life's no fun without a good scare! So join us now as we find out if  The Nightmare Before Christmas is an overrated and over-merchandised macabre fest, or if, after nearly 30 years, it's a delightful ode to the holidays that will continue to endure and bring joy and madness to countless future generations!!

 "Come with us and you will see, this, our town of Halloween."

“Someone's Got To Look Out For The Little Guy, Right?”

Greetings and Happy Holidays, fellow snarks and loyal listeners, and welcome back to another super-powered, web-slinging, coming of age cinematic universe sharing episode of THE FILM SNARKS!!!

We hope you’re all staying and merry and warm as we approach Thanksgiving this week!

With the holidays in full swing, that also means the Christmas Holiday Movie season is also well underway. And the big one this year is the next big blockbuster behemoth within the Marvel Cinematic Universe with Spider-Man: No Way Home next month where world's will collide with the Multiverse.

But before we get there, this week, we head back to high school for Peter Parker's sophomore year and 16th entry into the MCU with Spider-Man: Homecoming, which sees Spider-Man re-imagined for the millennial age, and it's a damn fun one at that!!

So join us as we say thank you to Sony and Marvel for bringing the wise-cracking web crawler into the MCU and to find out whether or not Spider-Man: Homecoming sticks the landing as just another attempt at a comic character who’s been done too many times before, or if it's a refreshing take on the web slinger with a ton of potential moving the Marvel Cinematic Universe forward!!

"Just a typical homecoming - on the outside of an invisible jet, fighting my girlfriends dad!"

"It's the name man... The Italian Stallion. The media will eat it up. Now, who discovered America? An Italian, right. What would be better than to get it on with one of its descendents?"

Welcome back to another street toughing, knuckle smashing, underdog cheering, All American episode of THE FILM SNARKS!!!

Have you ever been given an opportunity of a lifetime you maybe felt undeserving of?
Have you ever found yourself with all the odds stacked against but found the will to rise above and succeed anyway?

Well that's certainly the case with cinema's most celebrated underdog, The Italian Stallion himself, Rocky Balboa, as we take you back to the mean streets of Philadelphia in the 1970s where it all began in honor of the brand new Director's Cut of Rocky IV!!

And because it's almost Thanksgiving, come join us as we lace up our gloves, defy the odds, and make something of ourselves as we find out if Rocky (1976) is outdated cinema, or if it's still a fist-pumping triumphant masterpiece of filmmaking that defies the odds and goes the distance!!

"He doesn't know it's a damn show, he thinks it's a damn fight!"

"Welcome to The Witching Hour!"

Welcome back to another spell-binding, teenage angsty, and coming of age episode of THE FILM SNARKS!!!

And Happy Halloween, fellow snarks and loyal listeners!! Even though it’s sad but true, this week marks the conclusion of our Spooky Season celebration for 2021. 

So we thought we’d say farewell to October with a film that chronicles a sisterhood witches and the addictive misdeeds they get themselves into.

And no, we’re not talking about the Sanderson Sister Trio of Hocus Pocus!

But rather, the 1996 teen supernatural horror film, The Craft, which is celebrating its 25th Anniversary this year, so what better time than now to tap into our inner consciousness and find out if it still retains its magic, and ifThe Craft is purely a cinematic mess that deserved to be blown away by Twister just one week after release, or if its magic and spells call all four corners and raise the right amount of hell for us!

"Light as a feather. Stiff as a board."

“Evil Dies Tonight!”

Welcome back to another unapologetically brutal, totally unhinged, and cliffhanging episode of THE FILM SNARKS!!

It may have been a year long wait, but Michael Myers has returned home, to leave his hometown in peace. And so, too, have we returned to Haddonfield for the long-awaited Halloween Kills!!

But before Michael returns home, he leaves an IMPRESSIVELY brutal trail of blood, fear, and bodies on the road home, as this one picks up exactly where Halloween 2018 left off. And this one is not for the faint of heart!

So join us as we continue our Spooky Season event movies as we find out if Halloween Kills is purely hot trash that does little to better the newly established continuity of Michael Myers and Laurie Strode, or if it’s a serviceable entry in the long-running franchise that does what it’s supposed to do, which is mercilessly “kill” and entertain!

“Fear. People are afraid. That is the true curse of Michael Myers.”

"He may get the blood, but I get the glory."

Welcome back to another gore-infested, dream-invading, machete-wielding, and bloody disgusting episode of THE FILM SNARKS!!!

We decided to take a little break from Michael Myers this week to give a little love to the other two faces of horror, where the “dicer” meets the “slicer” to find out who is the worthy slasher victor.

In one corner, we have Freddy Krueger aka “The Springwood Slasher”, child murderer and dream invader who thrives on fear and fancies himself God, but only gets one lowly kill in this movie!

And in the other corner, we have the undead hockey-mask wearing, machete-wielding zombie, stealing all the best kills and blood, Jason Voorhees aka The Crystal Lake Killer!!

That's right, we’re talking about the 2003 slasher film, Freddy Vs. Jason, where these two horror titans face off and share the same universe for the first time ever!

So join us as we continue on with our Spooky Season Showdown as we find out if Freddy Vs. Jason is just slice of cheesy horror that should’ve stayed in development hell, or if it's satisfying trashy good horror fun watching the masked madman take on the dream demon in the ultimate Slash Of The Titans!!

"Freddy versus Jason. Place your bets."

"It's Halloween. I guess everyone's entitled to one good scare."

Welcome back to another pumpkin-carving, scare-heavy, teenage slashing episode of THE FILM SNARKS!!

Well, it is that time of year again, you know the month of October, my personal favorite time of the year, where the scenery is gorgeous, the air is crisp, and of course, it’s the one time out of the year to bring out the spooky movies of the season!

And if there’s one film in all of cinema that can be pretty much single-handedly credited to giving birth to the “Scare” or “Slasher” sub-genre of Horror movies, it is without a doubt John Carpenter’s original 1978 classic, Halloween!

What would you do if a psychotic masked killer was stalking you and killing off your friends one by one?

So join us as we find out if Halloween 1978 is a slow and dated horror flick with too many cliches, or if it's a masterclass in tension building, creepy, atmospheric filmmaking that would pave the way for countless imitators!

"The evil is gone!"

"Is this the gentleman who disabled an unmarked unit with a banana?"

Have you ever been a fish outta water at any time in your life?

Have you ever found yourself somewhere or in a situation you weren’t supposed to be in or in a place totally foreign and alien to you?

That is certainly the case with our beloved quick-tongued, street-smart  rebellious detective, Axel Foley (Eddie Murphy), in this week’s movie, Beverly Hills Cop!!

One of the most successful movies of the 80s and of all-time, join us as we ditch the darkened streets of Detroit for the glossy and sunny streets of Beverly Hills as our beloved detective brings a little Motor City mayhem to the coast as he seeks justice for his murdered friend. But also to find out if Beverly Hills Cop is still the best buddy cop movie ever!!

“I never been in no cell that had a phone in it. Can I stay for a while, 'cause I ordered some pizza.”

"There's no crying in baseball!"

Welcome back to another ball-playing, bat-swinging, base running, and All-American episode of THE FILM SNARKS!!!

It's about time we tackled another sports classic, and this is one we've been waiting to do for a while now and with the 20th anniversary of the September 11th attacks this past weekend, the aftermath of which we saw Americans come together as one, we thought the time was right to take a look back at a film that sees a league of extraordinary women bringing Americans together at the height of World War II, with the All-American Baseball Classic, A League Of Their Own!

Even if you're not the sporty type, there really is something here for everyone, as this is a film that's been universally adored by movie goers and critics for nearly 30 years now.

So join us as we find out if 1992's A League Of Their Own deserves to still be so loved as timely social commentary on sexism, but also just a fun and rewatch able sports classic!

"You stink! You're gonna lose!"

"This creature is the Bringer Of Death. He will never eat, he will never sleep, and he will never stop."

So welcome back to another historically ancient, treasure-hunting, and horrifyingly dead-raising episode of THE FILM SNARKS!!

Redemption is a recurring theme on this show, and it appears that actor Brendan Fraser is trending upward quite a bit lately. So we thought what better time than to take a look back at his best known work in the 1999 blockbuster classic, The Mummy!!

This one's got it all - charm, action, adventure, horror, comedy, stakes, undead ancient creatures hellbent on wreaking havoc on the world, etc. There's something here for everyone!

So join us as we take to the desert to uncover the secrets of an ancient civilization, but also to find out if The Mummy is still an action adventure classic worthy of the same conversations as Indiana Jones over 20 years later!

"Death is only the beginning."

“There are places in the world that aren’t made out of stone. There’s something inside they can’t touch.”

Welcome back to another life-sentencing, friendship-building, prison-breaking, and truly inspirational episode of THE FILM SNARKS!!!

That’s right, fellow snarks and loyal listeners, I can hardly believe it, but today marks our 50th snark-filled episode!

And we told you we had a special one lined up to mark the occasion...

Because this is our 50th episode, we thought it best to tackle what is often universally agreed to be cinema’s finest offering, which wasn’t a big hit when it originally released in 1994 and was underappreciated for sure.

But nowadays, it sits comfortably at #1 on IMDB’s top 250 Movies of All-Time, none other than the powerful and mighty Frank Darabont-directed prison drama, The Shawshank Redemption!

There's something in this film for everyone. So join us as we find out if The Shawshank Redemption an overrated internet sensation, or if it deserves every accolade and ounce of appreciation as cinema’s finest offering!!

“I find I’m so excited I can barely sit still or hold a thought in my head. I think that’s the excitement only a free man can feel, a free man at the start of a long journey whose conclusion is uncertain.

“Don't let yourself get attached to anything you are not willing to walk out on in 30 seconds flat if you feel the heat around the corner.”

Welcome back to another bank robbing, bullet-spraying, relationship-testing, crime-sweeping episode of THE FILM SNARKS!!

This week is a personally special episode for us because we recorded this the day before Matthew's 35th birthday. So we figured there's no time like the present to head back to the 90’s once more and dive into what is Matthew's undisputed FAVORITE movie all time…

The Michael Mann-directed L.A. crime drama, Heat, starring Al Pacino and Robert De Niro, marking the first time ever these two acting titans shared the screen together!

There's something in this one for everybody - cops, robbers, bank heists, shootouts, marital drama, romance, but above all, two men on opposite sides of the law that recognize each other's similarities and have mutual respect for each other.

So join us as we find out what side of the law we fall on and if Michael Mann's Heat, after 26 years, still stands tall as the greatest heist and crime drama film of all time!!

"When these guys come out of whatever score they're gonna take next... they're gonna have the surprise of a lifetime waiting for them."

"Welcome to The Rock!"

Welcome back to another prison-breaking, action-packed, terrorist-thwarting episode of THE FILM SNARKS!!!

We love the 90's! And this week, he jump back to 1996 where Andrew and I attempt to stop a rogue group of disgruntled Marines holding the city of San Francisco hostage with rockets armed with a deadly nerve gas, with what is probably director Michael Bay's "finest"movie and that is THE ROCK, starring Sean Connery, Nicolas Cage, and Ed Harris!!

And this being a Michael Bay flick, of course you have relentless and crazy action, huge explosions, and to quote Cyrus the Virus from Con Air, “filled with lots and lots of dead people”!

So join us once more as we find out if Michael Bay’s The Rock is a dated and mindless action flick just like the rest of his movies, or is it a perfect snapshot of the height of 90s action movies that continues to thrill and entertain 25 years on!!

"The Rock has become a tourist attraction?"