#112 A couple asked us the other day if it's bad to fantasize about someone else while being intimate with your partner.
Is that wrong?
Is it cheating?
Is it bad?
Let's dive into this rabbit hole of fantasy talk and where it could go!
Today, John and Jackie discuss red flags to keep in mind when you are looking to meet people in the lifestyle!
From being too direct out the gate to ignoring their boundaries, there are many red flags to look out for when talking to someone.
#113
The other day we did some coaching for a couple who wanted some help with their open relationship.
They had finally found a third person who was interesting and attractive to both of them and they wanted this person to be part of their throuple.
The couple was both excited about it, but as time went on, the woman in the relationship became more encompassed in her fear, which then of course triggered some of her partner's fears (based on past relationships).
So at this point, he wants the third person on board, but she doesn't.
In today’s episode, John and Jackie explore the reasons why non-monogamous relationships may fail.
Listen in as they discus the crucial aspects of communication, consideration of partner’s feelings, managing expectations, and the significance of respecting boundaries.
They also share personal insights and experiences, emphasizing the importance of open and honest discussions in navigating the challenges of consensually non-monogamous relationships.
#111 Ok so you're interested in this consensual non-monogamy thing, but how do you tell your partner about it?
How do you approach the topic and introduce them to CNM without freaking them out?!
Watch this video (perhaps together) and discover how!
#110 We had a comment/question from a couple in an open relationship where the wife is having a much easier time finding play partners than the husband, which led him to ask the question:
How do I find more play partners?
Let's jump in and discuss that!
#109 When people think Consensual Non-Monogamy (CNM), many of them think about the exciting and juicy non-monogamy part where you get to have sex with multiple partners. Lots of it. A lot of the time.
But is that true?
Is that what CNM is all about?
Let's explore and discuss that today!
#108 We talk about what to do if someone in a couple is having trouble staying hard during a swinger encounter and address common misconceptions about swingers always having perfect sex.
Since staying hard can be challenging for some men, we discuss ways we can take pressure off our male partners and how sex isn't just all about penetration.
#107 How the heck can I watch my partner with someone else and be ok with it?
This is a very common question for those who are getting into the lifestyle and haven't tried it before. And for some people who do try it, they have negative feelings and wonder how that can dissipate and transform into compersion for their partner.
We talk about all that and more in this video!
#106 We talk a lot about the deep emotional side of swinging - jealousy, fear, etc., so today we'd go the opposite direction and talk about the fun and lighter side of swinging and being in an open relationship.
#104 In part 1 of our discussion on boundaries, we talked about the importance and nuances of creating them.
In this part 2, we're going to talk about the transition into re-establishing boundaries.
This is where a month or two and some playdates have gone by and now it's time to look back at what worked and what didn't work, how do we make our box bigger, smaller, or different, and what really to do next now that you've come this far.
#103 In this episode of "Ask John and Jackie" they will engage with questions from their audience, providing valuable insights and advice on topics related to the swinger lifestyle.
They cover a range of questions, from entering the lifestyle as a single individual to the importance of discussing and revisiting boundaries within a relationship. "
There's no rigid rule in a swinger club that says you have to do something. You can do whatever you want to do." Jackie
#102 What's the big deal about boundaries one might say? Well, it could lead to a disaster in the start of your open relationship before it even begins.
#101 In this episode, John and Jackie share their personal experiences in the swinger lifestyle, discussing both the positive and challenging aspects.
They talk about how they got started in the lifestyle, navigating open relationships, and the growth of their own relationship over the years.
"Being invested in a long-term relationship doesn't preclude having an open exciting dynamic." John
#100 Whatever spectrum of the lifestyle you're playing at, let's say everything is sailing smoothly...until...
You hit those rough waters.
Maybe it's a playdate that went wrong.
Maybe it's taking a step too far past a boundary.
Maybe it's a nasty emotion that rears its ugly head that you weren't prepared for.
So what do you do now?
Watch this video so that you know what to do when the time comes (because it will).
#99 In this episode John and Jackie explore the exciting world of hotel takeovers within the swinger lifestyle.
They discuss the preparation, expectations, and experiences that come with attending these unique events.
From themed parties to meeting new people, they share their insights to ensure listeners make the most of their hotel takeover experiences.
#98 Is it true that men don't get emotionally attached after sex?
Which means they're better at open relationships than women?
Interesting questions/claims posed by one of our Podcast listeners that we will be discussing!
#97 In todays episode John and Jackie discuss the complexities of navigating boundaries in open relationships,particularly when it comes to overnight stays with other partners. They share their personal experiences and offer valuable insights into building trust, open communication, and respecting individual comfort levels within the swinging lifestyle.
The lifestyle can be quite the rollercoaster ride. One day on your elated on cloud nine and really excited about getting into the lifestyle. The next day you have anxiety about whether this was the right/proper thing to do.
(I'm sure my religious upbringing had something to do with it.)
So how do I explore my sexuality now?
Today we talk about this topic and what to do.
#95 Today we answer a doozy of a question in our video. It's a great question actually that we've certainly gone through and you may too. Here's the situation:
My wife and I have been married for some time and we recently opened our relationship. I was the one who brought her into this and of course I'm the one who is overcome with jealousy.
And it's not the sex part. Seeing her physically with another man doesn't bother me.
It's the emotional part that bothers me. I find myself overcome with jealousy when she goes on a date and is gone for so long - all day and night. I sit at home and want her to come back soon, while my mind runs all over the place thinking that she'll fall in love with him, she's spending more time with him and not enough with me, I don't feel loved when she spends the night with him...
I'm not sure how to deal with it at this point. I want to be happy for her and continue in the lifestyle, but it pains her to see me in pain when she's about to leave on her date.
Is it my self-esteem? How can I be more comfortable with her going on a date without me sitting her crying and whining and not enjoy my own night?
I want everything to work out, but my feelings keep getting in the way. Got any advice? Help!!!
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