Tracks Of The Damned

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Whether it's a complicated layered confession from the man who introduced blockbuster filmmaking into the water supply, turning his fellow New Hollywood icons into endangered species or just the best monster movie of the 90s, Jurassic Park (1993) is a beloved institution that will never go away, that children around the world will never stop enjoying, that will never stop influencing the world of populist popcorn cinema.

So why does everyone seem to get it wrong? To dig into the minutae of what makes this highly sophisticated machine tick and also just reminisce about being kids in the 90's when this came out, Patrick Ripoll and Regina Linn hold onto their butts and ask the big questions like:

Is this movie actually a good demonstration of chaos theory? How does Alan Grant know how to do a Brachiosaurus call? And just how many fucked up space drugs was ET using? 

All that and more on the most recent episode of Tracks of the Damned!

TIME STAMPS:
0:00 - 5:40  -  Intro
5:41 - 2:15:13  -  Commentary
2:15:14 - 2:21:12  -  Outro

A special Halloween treat: a unique performance of the classic HP Lovecraft short story by Patrick Ripoll and Regina Linn.

The climax of the career of the greatest horror star of all time and also a miserable failure critically and commercially, The Devil Commands was the product of a hungry up and coming director, Edward Dmytryk, being paired with material best described as "Lovecraftian" decades before that word meant anything to anybody. In this episode of Tracks of the Damned, the horror film commentary track podcast, host Patrick Ripoll tackles the second horror boom of the 40s and asks the big questions like: is that matte painting haunted?

Time-Stamps:
0:00 - 0:37  -  Apology Concerning My Thoughtless Words
0:38 - 2:47  -  Intro
2:48 - 1:10:05  -  Commentary
1:10:06 - 1:53:58  - Ten Must-See Karloff Performances
1:53:59 - 1:57:54  -  Outro

In a world full of rip-off artists the key is how you rip something off. Sean S. Cunningham, the director of two separate Bad News Bears knockoffs, was not the first guy to go "Hey, this Halloween movie is real popular and seems cheap to make" but he was the guy who did it the exact right way at the exact right time to change the world of horror forever.

On the latest episode of Tracks of the Damned Patrick finally returns to the one that started it all (the uncut version!) and talks about why critics despised it, why it was so successful and just what kind of winding road one takes from pornography to deep sea sci-fi movies.

0:00 - 5:18 - Intro
5:19 - 1:41:55 - Commentary
1:41:56 - 1:44:25 - Outro
1:44:26 - 1:48:23 - ???

It's cold, meat is carved and you're thankful it exists. That's all the justification we need for a special Thanksgiving episode of Tracks of the Damned where Patrick & Jim sat down and did an impromptu, research-free commentary track for The Evil Dead. You may not get to be with your family this year but sit down next to the hearth (don't forget the screaming claymation Necronomicon) and warm your bones with us and Bruce Campbell. That ain't cranberry sauce! Ash gets the stuffing beaten out of him. And a third Thanksgiving joke.

0:00 - 2:43 - Intro
2:44 - 1:30:39 - Commentary
1:30:40 - 1:43:07 - Outro

We've cut off heads, double impaled lovers, went 3D, we ended things, we began them again, we went Frankenstein, we went Carrie, we went to Manhattan, we went to Hell, we went to Space we went Kaiju, what the hell is left to do?

Do it all again!

How do you remake a movie when the things the fans love about the series don't actually exist in that movie? By remaking the entire series. As ambitious as it is divisive, Friday the 13th (2009) may not be a great film but it is a great example of the problem solving inherent to writing a remake. It's got perfect reference placement, baby.

0:00 - 2:25 - Intro
2:26: - 1:46:30 - Commentary
1:46:31 - 1:49:33 - Outro

"Remember last year, when we were worried that Halloween in 2020 wouldn't feel like Halloween? 'We can't bob for apples, the season is ruined!' Well now some time has passed, it's October again and I haven't even seen an apple in 7 months." - Micah Bravo, host of Tracks of the Damned

You think this year was a clusterfuck, you ain't see nothing yet. Live, from the radio station of the third most prestigious community college in the greater Baton Rouge area, DJ Micah Bravo (Regina Linn) surveys a decimated post-nuclear landscape and does what they do every Halloween: get high and party with another great mix of weird and wild spooky tunes. The pumpkins may have mutated a new skin that's impervious to knives but Halloween will never die!

ACT ONE

1. What Lurks On Channel X? by Rob Zombie
2. Concerto for Organ, Strings & Timpani in G Minor, FP 93: I. Andante by Francis Poulenc
3a. Troma Team Title Music
3b. Clip #1 of The Masque of the Red Death read by William S. Burroughs
3c. Silver Shamrock Jingle by John Carpenter & Alan Howarth
4a. Halloween by Betty Grable & David Wayne
4b. Slaughterhouse by Ganksta NIP
5a. Spookshow Trailer
5b. Experiment in Terror by Harry Mancini
6a. Dracula (1979) trailer
6b. Stage 4-3 Bram Stoker's Dracula for Genesis by Andy Brock
6c. Clips from Dracula (1979), Nosferatu (1979), Count Dracula (1970), Bram Stoker's Dracula, Count Dracula (1977), Spanish Dracula (1931)
7. Bela Lugosi by Severed Limb
8a. Dream Clinic scene from A Nightmare on Elm Street
8b. Bury a Friend by Billie Eilish
9a. Ghost in the Machine trailer
9b. Hex from The Andromeda Strain by Gil Mellé
10a. Carvel, Kooky Spooks Make-Up commercials
10b. The World Television Premier of John Carpenter's Halloween
10c. John Carpenter's Halloween by Trent Reznor and Atticus Ross
11a. To Raise The Dead by Vincent Price
11b. Zombie Jamboree by Harry Belaftone
12a. Living Dead Beats by Sek
12b. "Are they slow moving, chief?" from Night of the Living Dead
13. "I Love The Dead" by Alice Cooper

ACT TWO

1. The Spook by Pete Drake
2. Theme From Cannibal Ferox by Roberto Donati and Fiamma Maglione
3. Clip #2 of The Masque of the Red Death read by William S. Burroughs
4a. "Whoa, psychedelic!" from Terrorvision
4b. Terrorvision Theme by The Fibonaccis
5. Night of the Vampire by The Moontrekkers
6a. Halloween Saftey (1985) clip
6b. Fall Children by AFI
7a. "All the different ways of dying. Violently?" clip from Return of the Living Dead
7b. Transylvanian Concubine by Rasputina
8. Dead & Buried Suite by Joe Renzetti
9. Now I'm Feeling Zombified by Alien Sex Fiend
10a. Sadismo trailer
10b. Shadowman by Link Wray
11a. 781 Redrum by Brotha Lynch Hung
11b. Pass The Shovel by Gravediggaz
12. Boo! from The Canterville Ghost by Gordon Getty

ACT THREE

1. The Munge by Genki Genki Panic
2. Werewolf & Witchbreath by The Troll
3. Clip #3 of The Masque of the Red Death read by William S. Burroughs
4a. The Hills Have Eyes Opening Theme by Don Peake
4b. Sammy Terry Nightmare Theater opening
5. Dr. Holmes (He Stripped Their Bones) by Macabre
6a. Abby Trailer
6b. Day of Wrath Funk Breaks by The Rite of Exorcism
7a. Penn Jillette on Monstervision: Ed Wood defense
7b. Opening Theme to Ed Wood by Howard Shore
8a. Hot Rod Herman clip
8b. The Munsters theme by The Surf Dawgs
9a. Subway scene from Possession (1981)
9b. Demon Host by Timber Timbre
10a. Don't by Garden on a Trampoline
10b. New Jim Jones (live) by Dre Dog

It took 17 years, three god-awful sequels, 18 spec scripts and meetings with every person who ever worked in Hollywood but we got here, we have arrived, grab your shit from the overhead bin because the plane has landed, Freddy Vs. Jason is upon us.

A stupid idea inspired by only the most juvenile among the fanbases somehow, some way, turned out to be one of the best entries in either series, a well-crafted and energetic bit of party cinema, grab your gummi bears and throw them at the screen, shouting is enouraged! And in that spirit join Patrick as well as Genre Grinder's Gabe Powers for a rollicking good time commentary that dares to ask:

When did horror movie soundtracks become heavy metal mixtapes? Where did Kane Hodder go? And who the hell approved that original ending that caps off a decades-awaited monster mash with Freddy committing sexual assault?

All that PLUS we pitch our own Freddy Vs. Jason ideas on this latest episode of Tracks of the Damned!

0:00 - 5:12 - Intro
5:13 - 1:50:57 - Commentary
1:50:58 - 2:08:39 - Our Freddy Vs. Jason Pitches
2:08:40 - 2:13:40 - Outro

After Paramount squeezed all of the blood they could from their stone they sold that dry-ass stone to New Line with a shrug and a smile. They say the plan was always Freddy vs. Jason, but when Wes Craven threw a monkey wrench into the spokes of his old friend Sean Cunningham and, with no ideas and no real interest in anything but money, Cunningham went the dirt cheap route of hiring a bunch of college kids, including his son's old best friend Adam, to radically alter the massive film franchise he didn't quite intend to create.

Did this gambit pay off and redefine the beloved series? Or did they make Jason Goes To Hell?

On the latest episode of Tracks of the Damned, Patrick takes a look at the misbegotten sequel and asks important questions such as: What adored horror icon gave a blessing to this rip-off of his work? What does Kane Hodder do all day on the set of a Jason movie with little to no Jason? And why the hell is this movie so fucking hard to watch?

Also featuring an introduction from indie wrestling star and AAW champion Mance Warner! Kneepad up, kneepad down!

0:00 - 2:02 - Mance Warner intro
2:03 - 9:18 - Intro
9:19 - 1:40:18 - Commentary
1:40:19 - 1:46:47 - Outro

If the quintessential quarantine experience is walking around your house bored doing nothing as you wait for the pizza you ordered to arrive, than The House of the Devil is the quintessential quarantine movie. Alternately thought of as brilliant and a total waste of time, Ti West's divisive modern classic may not have a quick pace but will it quicken your pulse?

To find out we got Jim and Patrick to take a look and debate it's relative merits as horror and as art, time capsule and post-modern riff, homage and parody. And also complain a lot because THIS MOVIE IS BORING AS SHIT. Or at least, so sayeth Patrick. But Jim forsooth sayeth thy atmosphere et thee pace is interesting.

Or something.

0:00 - 3:40 - 2020 Intro
3:41 - 9:07 - 2017 Intro
9:08 - 1:46:31 - Commentary
1:46:32 - 1:48:05 - 2020 Outro

Parting can be such sweet sorrow, but it can also just be sorrow, no sweetness, nothing good about it whatsoever. As we close the book on the Paramount years of the Friday the 13th series we see that Frank Mancuso Jr. opted to go out not with a bang, or even a whimper, just a shrug, a gimmicky ad campaign and no fucks given whatsoever.

Welcome to Friday the 13th Part 8: Jason Takes Manhattan, where the ideas ran out long before the money did. But if we are to continue down the thankless path to hell, chronicling the remaining years of Jason Voorhees, we need not do it alone. On this episode of Tracks of the Damned, the horror film commentary track podcast, Patrick is joined by Louisa Herron of Hack the Net to watch this execrable mess and ask the big questions, like:

Did Rob Hedden have any ideas to begin with? What type of Pokemon is Jason? And would you rather live without potatoes or onions?

Punch it up!

0:00 - 6:17 - Intro
6:18 - 1:49:30 - Commentary
1:49:31 - 2:01:59 - Outro

So you get your X-Ray Vision but the truth is that after a week of staring at everyone's boobs and dongs nudity fails to do anything for you anymore. What are you going to use it for? Cheating at cards? Curing the sick? Hiding in a dingy Long Beach boardwalk doing insult comedy while dressed lake a blindfolded Pharaoh?

If you said all three you might be Dr. James Xavier, star of Roger Corman's 1963 classic X: The Man with the X-ray Eyes. On the latest episode of Tracks of the Damned we take a look at a pivotal AIP sci-fi shocker and ask the big questions like:

How did this movie change the career of Roger Corman? What classic novel does it resemble? And is that really any way to test a monkey? All this and more! Pluck em out!

0:00 - 4:35 - Intro
4:36 - 1:24:40 - Commentary
1:24:41 - 1:30:00 - Outro