caregiver fatigue

Caregiver Stress

Are you a parent, caring for your parent, caring for a special need’s child and/or working in a caring profession?  Becky and Franne feel you.  This episode addresses the stress you experience and ways to reduce it.

✨ Shrink Rap the Podcast is a mental health podcast where your hosts, Franne & Becky, give proper respect to various mental health issues, with a healthy dose of smart-assery.

In each episode, we dive into diverse topics, from navigating relationships to the intricacies of mental well-being. Our mission is to dismantle stigma, foster understanding, and provide you with valuable insights to enhance your mental health journey.

Join us as we bring you engaging conversations with experts, share personal and professional experiences, and offer practical tips to navigate life’s challenges. We believe in the power of conversation to inspire, educate, and empower.

📲 How to Connect with The Shrinks:
- Subscribe/follow to never miss an episode!
- Leave a review to share your thoughts and answer the Spotify Q&A.
- Connect with us on social media:
- IG: @shrink_rap_thepodcast
- FB: https://www.facebook.com/ShrinkRapPodcast
- Visit our website for additional resources, episodes, and gear! https://www.shrinkrapthepodcast.com

🫱🏼‍🫲🏻 Thank you for being part of the Shrink Rap community. Let’s continue the conversation and create a world where mental health is understood, embraced, and celebrated.

Why do you feel like a dirty dish rag (or wet noodle) when you are with your loved one sitting all day in the clinic?  It's stressful, exhausting, frustrating and boring.  Right?

In this episode,  we're talking about surviving those long days, what to bring to help you combat the boredom and ways to combat the energy that gets sucked out of you.  

Thank you for listening. If you know of another caregiver who could benefit from this podcast, please copy and share this episode.

Follow me by clicking on the links below:

• ➡️ Get my free resource: 17 SHIFTS TO RECUDE CAREGIVER STRESS & SAY GOOD-BYE TO CAREGIVER BURNOUT
• If you're interested in 1:1 Coaching ➡️ schedule a 30 minute FREE chat
• CONNECT WITH CATHY ON INSTAGRAM @cathylynnvan for daily tips and inspiration

Tired of being triggered? Tired of feeling overwhelmed, and like you are your own worst parenting enemy? 

I know the guilt that comes from yelling at my kids, or feeling angry when I know there isn't a reason. Mom burnout is REAL.

Mom burnout can lead to feelings of failure, guilt, overwhelm, and a breakdown in the very relationships we hold SO dear. We can become of victim of this, if we don't recognize it for what it is, and take charge. You will LOVE yourself for overcoming mom burnout, and your family will too.

Today Dr. Jessica Buhler and I are breaking down mom burnout, and showing you what it is, so you can call it out and get rid of it ONCE AND FOR ALL! Banish the overwhelm and burnout!

Self care is not selfish, it's just what you need, and what we share might surprise you! We will chat about how to get out of burnout, and love your life more.

Every mom needs to hear this, it's always a good reminder, no matter how many times we have over come burnout before. It's always a temptation to get overcommitted and start putting ourselves last.

Grab your warm mug of goodness, and let's dig in.
XO
Katie

Our Gift to You!
Nurturing a Joyful Homeschool and Creating a Harmonious Home: herhomeandheart.net/free

4 Simple Steps TO REDUCE OVERWHELM:

STEP 1)
FEEL GOOD with proven cellular science:
familysuccess.lifevantage.com

STEP 2)
Be part of Community! 

https://urlgeni.us/facebook/HHAHGroup

Step 3)
Hacks, Coupons, Courses, Memberships, and FUN THINGS :

https://linktr.ee/FamilySuccess

Step 4) 
Want Your Question Considered For The Podcast? Leave me a message!
https://www.speakpipe.com/Katie

To Find Dr. Buhler: 
https://www.facebook.com/jessica.buhler.549

Being aware of what caregiver season you are in, will help you in many ways.   In this episode we're breaking down each season.  

• LOW / GREEN
• MEDIUM / YELLOW
• HIGH / RED 

Are you in a low, medium or high this week? 
 

If you are in that high season right now.  Remember the color it is.  Red means that you may need to stop doing things and prioritize what’s most important.  It may require you to ask for help and most importantly grant yourself grace.  Your focus is in the present.  

If you are in the low, you may be able to take a breath and enjoy yourself more.   

I personally find the medium, the hardest.  Your emotions and thoughts want to be in low and you tend to be hard on myself.  When you're in the middle, you have to shift and adjust more.  

As you enter your day and week, my hope is that you assess where you are at.  That way you can realistically be at your best.   Your caregiver stress will be different in each season.  Your self-care will look different in each level.   

It’s a constant learning process and an awareness.   But you can make choices for yourself in each season. 

Get my free resource:  17 SHIFTS TO TAKE CONTROL OF CAREGIVER STRESS that will take you to the best version of yourself.

Thank you for listening. If you know of another caregiver who could benefit from this podcast, please copy and share this episode.

Follow me by clicking on the links below:

• ➡️ Get my free resource: 17 SHIFTS TO RECUDE CAREGIVER STRESS & SAY GOOD-BYE TO CAREGIVER BURNOUT
• If you're interested in 1:1 Coaching ➡️ schedule a 30 minute FREE chat
• CONNECT WITH CATHY ON INSTAGRAM @cathylynnvan for daily tips and inspiration

Loving  yourself is an integral part of establishing healthy boundaries.  Yet for women caregivers, we don’t always listen to ourselves and make improvements.   

If we don’t, it leads to health issues, fatigue, burnout and more.  

The first step is identifying your healthy boundaries by looking at your challenges and  causes.  Then ask yourself, if it’s due to unhealthy boundaries.    

The next is  focus on one.   Find the one you really feel passionate about.  The one that you need the most.  For example,  If you are exhausted and feel tired all the time.  Then list out why you think you are tired.  Write them all down.  

Now you are ready to take action.   Your healthy boundaries is something personal and you need to buy into it.  Drawing a boundary is one of the highest expressions of self-love.  

The more you love yourself  in real and tangible ways, the more you will trust yourself.  Life is so much better when you have  your own back.   

The energy that comes from self-awareness, self-care and self-love is immeasurable.  When you are true to yourself and make empowered decisions to set healthy boundaries, you are able to give genuinely to yourself, your loved one and be the best version of yourself.

I know what you are thinking.  Your mind is telling you, I can’t, it’s too hard,  there is no-one that can help.    Your mind is talking you out of it.   My friend,  it’s fear that’s talking to you.   It your people pleaser tendencies that’s talking you out of it.  

Instead, let your heart, courage and will-power walk you towards joy and self-love for you.  You look out for your loved one’s best interests - now you have to look after yourself too.  

Your level of self-love sets the bar for everything - your relationship with your loved one, your joy in this journey, your success in juggling everything, your decision making,  - you fill in the blank.  So Aim high.  

Now this won’t make all your challenges go away but you can control your health and well-being so you can feel good about your caregiving. 

I want you to give yourself permission to explore doing things differently, to change your mind, to say no, to laugh, to sing, to smile, to feel happy, to simply be.   You can make decisions for you first.  You can put yourself first.  

I’m challenging you and cheering you on this week to identify a personal boundary you want to work on and that small step.   

Grab the show notes here  ➡️ https://www.cathylvan.com/episode122
Listen to another great episode on healthy boundaries :   ➡️ https://www.cathylvan.com/episode121
Join the Caregiver Cup Circle  ❤️ https://www.cathylvan.com/caregivercircle
1:1 Coaching  ➡️   DM Cathy at

Get my free resource:  17 SHIFTS TO TAKE CONTROL OF CAREGIVER STRESS that will take you to the best version of yourself.

Thank you for listening. If you know of another caregiver who could benefit from this podcast, please copy and share this episode.

Follow me by clicking on the links below:

• ➡️ Get my free resource: 17 SHIFTS TO RECUDE CAREGIVER STRESS & SAY GOOD-BYE TO CAREGIVER BURNOUT
• If you're interested in 1:1 Coaching ➡️ schedule a 30 minute FREE chat
• CONNECT WITH CATHY ON INSTAGRAM @cathylynnvan for daily tips and inspiration

This is Part 2.  Identifying your burnout is key and being aware of your physical and emotional signs (or your lack of thoughts, actions or words).  

Figuring out the why will help you better understand how to reduce your burnout.  

In this episode,  I'm going through the vital steps to understand why and move you towards your own action:

• Focus and live in the present
• Accepting your situation and circumstances
• Finding meaning in your challenges and struggles
• Working on managing your energy
• Starting with quiet activities to reduce stress

Stress is inevitable, but you need to assess it by asking:

• Am I creating this stress?
• What caused the stress?
• How do I respond to stress?
• Can I improve the stress going forward?  

Burnout can't be reduced overnight.  It will feel messy, uncomfortable, emotional and scary.  But when you take micro steps and celebrate each little win, you will see progress. 

Grab the show notes here  ➡️ https://www.cathylvan.com/episode117

Download  ➡️   3 Stages of Caregiver Overwhelm

Take the      ➡️ Caregiver Quiz

Join the Caregiver Cup Circle  ❤️ https://www.cathylvan.com/caregivercircle
The small group meets every other Tuesday.  We would love to have you!

>>CONNECT WITH CATHY ON INSTAGRAM @cathylynnvan for daily tips and inspiration
https://instagram.com/cathylynnvan/

Get my free resource:  17 SHIFTS TO TAKE CONTROL OF CAREGIVER STRESS that will take you to the best version of yourself.

Thank you for listening. If you know of another caregiver who could benefit from this podcast, please copy and share this episode.

Follow me by clicking on the links below:

• ➡️ Get my free resource: 17 SHIFTS TO RECUDE CAREGIVER STRESS & SAY GOOD-BYE TO CAREGIVER BURNOUT
• If you're interested in 1:1 Coaching ➡️ schedule a 30 minute FREE chat
• CONNECT WITH CATHY ON INSTAGRAM @cathylynnvan for daily tips and inspiration

Burnout is easy to identify if you really reflect on your thoughts, actions, and the words you say to yourself or others. 

Words you say:  

• Things will be ok when my loved one feels better
• I just have to get through the next week and I have a day off to catch up.

Actions:  

• You feel exhausted, emotional or irritable.  A little challenge sets you off - ie:  driving the car, or forgetting the keys, or you snappping at your loved one.
• Your to-do list stresses you out.  You try to replan it but the load is still too heavy

Thoughts:

• You think about escaping.  wish you could pack your bag and run away
• You don’t like your loved one (resentment) and then you feel guilty for feeling this way 

But the reality is that you are a caregiver.  The universe is not conspiring against you, no one is trying to put these road blocks in your way intentionally   Caregiving and its challenges are just happening.  How you choose to look at things- ultimately determines your stress level. 

But if you let the stress get the best of you - it will lead to burnout.  And there is a cost to burnout. 

 So the big question is,  how do you show up as an effective and passionate caregiver , and not burn out.

Grab the show notes here  ➡️ https://www.cathylvan.com/episode116

Download  ➡️   3 Stages of Caregiver Overwhelm

Take the      ➡️ Caregiver Quiz

Join the Caregiver Cup Circle  ❤️ https://www.cathylvan.com/caregivercircle
The small group meets every other Tuesday.  We would love to have you!

>>CONNECT WITH CATHY ON INSTAGRAM @cathylynnvan for daily tips and inspiration
https://instagram.com/cathylynnvan/

Get my free resource:  17 SHIFTS TO TAKE CONTROL OF CAREGIVER STRESS that will take you to the best version of yourself.

Thank you for listening. If you know of another caregiver who could benefit from this podcast, please copy and share this episode.

Follow me by clicking on the links below:

• ➡️ Get my free resource: 17 SHIFTS TO RECUDE CAREGIVER STRESS & SAY GOOD-BYE TO CAREGIVER BURNOUT
• If you're interested in 1:1 Coaching ➡️ schedule a 30 minute FREE chat
• CONNECT WITH CATHY ON INSTAGRAM @cathylynnvan for daily tips and inspiration

A gift for our listeners: Download Maureen's free interactive workbook and video From Pain to Power: Mastering the Vertical Path to Immediate, Miraculous Healing No Matter What Problems, Challenges, Obstacles or Pain Stand in Your Way

Topics addressed in this episode include:

• The physical vs. the non-physical parts of us
• The limitations of a body-focused perspective
• What is the Unmanifested?
• How to tap the Unmanifested to unlock your creative potential
• The stages to becoming a Miracle Renegade
• The difference between making and creating
• Why appreciation is essential to manifestation
• Lessons on sacrifice and suffering

Learn more about the three phases of the E3 Transformational Triad: Miracle Mindedness, Miracle Matrixing and Miracle Mastery. (<-- link underlined text to https://www.experienceaxiom.com/about-maureen-whitehouse-transformational-triad-spiritual-teachings/ )

[The following can be copy/pasted from Simplecast:]

Support us on Patreon and get access to bonus recordings, meditations, outtakes and more! www.patreon.com/miraclerenegade

For behind-the-scene updates and a little taste of the miraculous everyday, follow @miraclerenegade on Instagram 

Produced with ❤️by Adam Gamwell for Axiom Productions

Have you said to yourself :  Why don’t I have the energy like I used to have?   Or, I am so tired all the time.   

It’s called caregiver fatigue.   This occurs when you feel emotionally and physically exhausted.  You are wearing out.  You are feeling totally used up due to too many demands.  You are burning out.

• What are your emotional demands?   Your loved one is sick and you can’t make them better.  They demand an extreme degree of physical and emotional care.
• What are your conflicting priorities?   Who else needs your time and energy?   Your family, your children, your boss, your employees, your co-workers,  Trying to meeting everyone’s needs creates conflict and stress.  
• Do you feel ambiguity in your new normal?  You really don’t know exactly what to do, meaning your roles and responsibilities.   
• You workload.  What’s on your plate?  Are you trying to juggle everything?  
• What about all the advocacy responsibilities?  The insurance, medical decisions,  medical visits, doctor conversations and nursing questions.   On top of that, making the hard decisions on finances, home care, hospice care and estate plans.   
• Then there’s the lack of privacy.  Do you feel it?  There is no time to be alone.  There may be many people in and out of your home or your life assisting with some facet of the caregiving all the time.  

These factors may contribute to feelings  that you have no control, or that you don’t have adequate skills or knowledge in this area.  Feeling that you don’t have independence or “say so” in your life.   Feeling you can’t succeed, or that you’re a failure.

When burnout reaches a critical level, it begins to be very evident in your life.  Burnout can manifest itself in various ways, including:  depression, withdrawal, feelings of helplessness or hopelessness, negative emotions, physical fatigue, sleep deprivation or sleep disorders, personal health problems and lowered self-esteem.

What do you do when you recognize this feeling of caregiver fatigue 

• Ask yourself, how are you taking care of yourself?   I know how hard it can be to stop and look at yourself in the mirror and say, you are not well.   
• Be honest and truthful with yourself.   Look at your sleep, nutrition, hydration and exercise.  Look at your schedule from work to family to your loved one’s care.  

When you admit the burn out,  you can start working on you.   Make a commitment.  It may start with a walk each evening after supper or coffee on the porch in the morning with a gratitude journal or food prepping each week or scheduling therapy.  

Now you can’t wake up and say, I’m committed to this great plan.  Take baby steps and just start.  Maybe this week it’s drinking your water.   Remember in this caregiver life you're in, you can’t add more pressure and stress to yourself.  So small steps will be better for you.  

Schedule one evening or day to f

Get my free resource:  17 SHIFTS TO TAKE CONTROL OF CAREGIVER STRESS that will take you to the best version of yourself.

Thank you for listening. If you know of another caregiver who could benefit from this podcast, please copy and share this episode.

Follow me by clicking on the links below:

• ➡️ Get my free resource: 17 SHIFTS TO RECUDE CAREGIVER STRESS & SAY GOOD-BYE TO CAREGIVER BURNOUT
• If you're interested in 1:1 Coaching ➡️ schedule a 30 minute FREE chat
• CONNECT WITH CATHY ON INSTAGRAM @cathylynnvan for daily tips and inspiration

Are you burning out?  
Are you exhausted, fatigued, or just plain tired?
What’s your stress level? 
What about your anxiety level?
Are you sad or depressed?

How do you feel about your health?  Are you taking care of yourself?  Are you losing weight?  Or are you gaining weight?  

These are just a few symptoms of caregiver stress and caregiver burnout?  

I want to talk today about the ONE thing you can do.  The ONE thing you can take control of.  

I'm here to give you some tough love and hard talk.  

It’s time . Let me say it again.  It’s time.  Time to move!   

I'm here to tell you that you have to move.  

You have to even if you don’t feel like it.  Even if you're tired.  Even if you don’t think you have time.  

Start small -  just 20 minutes a day is all you need.   Or even if it’s 15 minutes.  

A study from Harvard says:   “Exercising as little as 15 minutes of physical activity a day can increase your life span by 3 years." 

Here’s another stat from caregiver.org and the Family Caregiver Alliance:  35% of female caregivers report high levels of stress.  Those symptoms go from headaches to high blood pressure to weight gain.  

Think of movement and exercise as an outlet.  A place to go to recharge, think and take care of yourself

Let me share my story.   

Pre-caregiving, I was very active.   I went to the gym 5-6 days a week.  Prior to my Dad and Spouse getting their cancer diagnosis in Sept 2017, I was training for my 9th half marathon.  

It was a habit and routine I stuck with since I felt better.  I watched what I ate.  Don’t get me wrong, there were days I didn’t want to get up and move my body.  But when I did, I was happier.   

Then Sept 2017 came and I thought I didn’t have time.  I told myself I was too tired.

By Summer of 2019, I was 30 pounds heavier.  I had digestive issues and was clinically depressed.  I looked in the mirror at me and decided enough was enough.  

I knew I had to move each day.  It was hard to start again.  I knew what to do but breaking the caregiver life routine without exercise was harder than I could ever imagine.  

But I'm working on moving 20 minutes each day.   Even with the pandemic, I knew I could still move.

What about you?   Can you find just 20 minutes each day?   YOU Can.  You have to!!!  It’s just 20.    

Let’s talk about what you and I can do in these 20 minutes.  It has to be fun or you won’t stay with it.  So if you hate running - don’t run.  But if you don’t mind walking - walk.  

• Walk - make it fun by putting on your ear buds and listening to your favorite music or a podcast.  Walk with a friend.  Take the dog for a walk.  Find a trail or window shop downtown
• Bike - Last summer I would schedule my break time and go for a bike ride.  
• Yoga 
• Dancing
• Elliptical / Treadmill
• Weights / bands 
• Vaccuuming
• Gardening

It’s just about getting your heart rate up which then can lower your stress, anxiety and improve your mood

Join me this week LIVE on

Thank you for listening. If you know of another caregiver who could benefit from this podcast, please copy and share this episode.

Follow me by clicking on the links below:

• ➡️ Get my free resource: 17 SHIFTS TO RECUDE CAREGIVER STRESS & SAY GOOD-BYE TO CAREGIVER BURNOUT
• If you're interested in 1:1 Coaching ➡️ schedule a 30 minute FREE chat
• CONNECT WITH CATHY ON INSTAGRAM @cathylynnvan for daily tips and inspiration

FACT:  You have 168 hours a week.  24 hours a day.  No more.  

• How many hours do you work your job or business?
• How many hours do you spend working around your home?
• How many hours running errands?
• Now at the time of the podcast - it’s holiday season. How many hours are you shopping, wrapping, baking, decorating or doing other activities of the season?
• How many hours do you spend caregiving?
• Time for you?

Have you said any of these words out loud or to yourself  

• I am so tired?  
• I can barely make it through the day.  
• I would give anything to take a nap.  
• I can’t remember the last time I had a goodnight sleep. 
• I just keep drinking caffeine hoping to stay awake. 

I want to share a couple stories with you.  

These two stories are my own.  I didn’t want to realize my reality.  I didn’t want to face that I couldn’t do it all.  

I lied to myself that things would get better.   I was at a virtual conference this week and listened to Michael Hyatt and this so resonated with me  

• “Resist the illusion to think your workload is temporary.”  
  • I kept telling myself that life would get better and this wouldn’t be forever.  
  • I needed to take a trip to the honest planet and come clean - I needed to change

I let this go on and on for months.  Looking back, I now recognize it.  I also see the negative results:  I gained 30 pounds, didn’t get my yearly raise, disconnected with my friends, and struggled with health issues.  

This is hard for me to talk about.  People kept telling me I was an inspiration but deep inside I was so tired.  I felt exhausted all the time.  I felt like a failure.  

But one can only do what they can do.  One can only do what you know and think is right.  

Friend, I am telling you that it’s time to take a look in that mirror and really ask yourself are you being honest with yourself.  

If you want to reduce fatigue, you need to start with recognition.  

Look at your week and write down all the things you have on your schedule.  All the details.  

Evaluate how you are spending your time.  

• What things were necessary?  (sleep, nutrition)
• What things could you get help with? (home chores)
• What things were missing?  (time away)
• What things could you eliminate or get efficiency in  (online deliveries)

You can’t put more coffee in your filled cup

Unfortunately there is not a quick fix to Caregiver Fatigue or Caregiver Stress.  But what I know is that you can take baby steps.  You deserve it.  You can’t drink from an empty cup

Thank you for listening. If you know of another caregiver who could benefit from this podcast, please copy and share this episode.

Follow me by clicking on the links below:

• ➡️ Get my free resource: 17 SHIFTS TO RECUDE CAREGIVER STRESS & SAY GOOD-BYE TO CAREGIVER BURNOUT
• If you're interested in 1:1 Coaching ➡️ schedule a 30 minute FREE chat
• CONNECT WITH CATHY ON INSTAGRAM @cathylynnvan for daily tips and inspiration